Is "sugar" a thing in DMV upper class?

[Anonymous]

It is men with more power and money exploiting women with less and poor self esteem.

If he is married—more the sleaze.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:“Sugar???”

Stop with the euphemisms.

If you have to use them, be aware that what you are doing is gross.

That's what it's called.

This is like saying we should only call it "sexual intercourse".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is men with more power and money exploiting women with less and poor self esteem.

If he is married—more the sleaze.

OR, women extracting money from morons?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A lot of men use SA to try stuff their wife won’t allow, like putting the schlong in the chocolate starfish, certain types of role play, and start to finish BJ’s. Me and all of my friends use it. I’ve met a few dozen off there over the years.

And it does not bother you that this is what they do with different men every week?

Would you let your daughter use this outlet for extra spending money?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Disagree. Many I have met have the education...they really do.

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Please define having a degree. I doubt that women who graduate from top20 schools are doing this.

I went to an elite boarding school, private top 20 college, ivy-league graduate school. I have a full-time job and a part-time gig job.

I am on there because I am a single parent after husband left. I need the money to support my children to stay in my houses. To support my career in the social justice field. I’m there because men make way more than women.

I don’t want to be there but also do not have time for a third job.

Please do not judge what you don’t know about.

There are plenty of “highly educated” girls moonlighting as sugar baby. I came across two medical residents, a Harvard grad and a couple of PHD students too. It’s frankly no big deal to the younger generation.

Tell yourself whatever stories you like, but you know and we know the average sugar baby is not UMC and not highly educated. I hate that media like Tiktok and articles in Cosmopolitan glamorize this for young women.

+1. Prostitutes from any background have the street smarts to say that they are in school and that is why they need money, not their heroin addiction. This way their customer can tell himself he is helping out struggling law or nursing student, not exploiting a drug addict or mentally unstable poor person. Like every salesperson, they know they can extract more money from happy customers who feel good about themselves.

Exactly . anyone who goes along with calling this sugar has an extreme need to deny the reality of what he is doing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:male 40s high income, 12yrs married, two kids. not much marital sex but otherwise nice marriage. i use sugar to satisfy a need and ease the resentment at home. i can be a good husband while getting my needs met in a NSA arrangement that has little chance of getting ugly (no real emotional entanglements) .. DW and I haven't discussed this but I think she may suspect this because she knows I have always been as horny as fkc at the same time I don't think we are technically DADT either. sugar is also much safer and less "eww" than going for the real pros (hookers, happy ending massages etc) .... plus in the DC area the sugar babies are generally collage girls (educated) and "interesting" outside of the few mins of sex.
'

Sure, you are a good husband.

And you are kidding yourself that you are almost not lying to your wife about this.

So sad that you are paying young women who will be ashamed for the rest of their lives that they had to stoop to servicing you for money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My wealthyish 40s single friend did it a few times. He was a gentleman and took them to dinner, paid for a hotel, but said it was just not worth the money. Sometimes they showed up dressed like high end escorts, and it was embarrassing to be in public with them. An average looking middle age guy might want a beautiful companion, but you don't want everyone near you to assume it is an arrangement.

It WAS an arrangement.

He is a gentleman . He was disappointed that the prostitutes had had hired would not play along with that facade.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:male 40s high income, 12yrs married, two kids. not much marital sex but otherwise nice marriage. i use sugar to satisfy a need and ease the resentment at home. i can be a good husband while getting my needs met in a NSA arrangement that has little chance of getting ugly (no real emotional entanglements) .. DW and I haven't discussed this but I think she may suspect this because she knows I have always been as horny as fkc at the same time I don't think we are technically DADT either. sugar is also much safer and less "eww" than going for the real pros (hookers, happy ending massages etc) .... plus in the DC area the sugar babies are generally collage girls (educated) and "interesting" outside of the few mins of sex.
'

Sure, you are a good husband.

And you are kidding yourself that you are almost not lying to your wife about this.

So sad that you are paying young women who will be ashamed for the rest of their lives that they had to stoop to servicing you for money.

This guy is definitely a bad husband, but I don't think the women have anything to be ashamed of. And, as I said above, based on my friends in college who did this, they are not losing sleep over it and it hasn't affected their lives. And they wouldn't have called it "stooping to service men for money" they would call it, "having the same sex they were going to have anyway."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My wealthyish 40s single friend did it a few times. He was a gentleman and took them to dinner, paid for a hotel, but said it was just not worth the money. Sometimes they showed up dressed like high end escorts, and it was embarrassing to be in public with them. An average looking middle age guy might want a beautiful companion, but you don't want everyone near you to assume it is an arrangement.

He was paying, they should've worn what he wanted.

It's his fault for not telling them what to wear or saying, sorry, we're skipping the theater and we're going straight to mine.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Yes. I'd say half my friends (I'm male, in my 40s) do this, and that's just the ones who admit to it. We're all in the higher income level (entrepreneurs, finance, lawyers).

Are you one of them?

Where did you meet these friends? College? Grow up together? At work? I'm wondering what i the common denominator. I'm also in my 40s and higher income level (lawyers) and I don't know anyone doing this.
And what are the demographics of their wives? Equivalent education and income level to your friends? I just can't imagine in my social circles the wives not noticing a substantial financial outlay.

Some I've know for years, some more recent. Eveyone in my circle is college educated and usually a masters. Wives tend to be career types also.

When you have a high HHI, no one is noticing $1-2k every month. Besides, you usually have a bunch of different accounts and credit cards at that level. No one has time to dig through all that.

$1-2k a month? That’s it?!?

Remember college girls aren't doing it for a living. Your typical GW student (GW is #1 in the DC area in terms of % of undergrads who do this) has all her tuition and room and board covered by her parents. This is fun money to buy fancy clothes, and also just fun to go out with someone mature and wealthy.

Umm just get a real job, then. You can’t find a job that will pay you $250 a week? Willing to lose your dignity and have sex with an old guy... eww. I was poor in college and worked my way through an Ivy. No way would I consider $1-2k a month to have sex with a guy in his 40s. No one I knew would have done it either. Just yuck.

There are entire websites with thousands of young women willing to "Lose their dignity" for $$. What the sugar baby trend and the OnlyFans trend show is that many young women are willing to trade their sexuality for $$. They have grown up in an era where casual sex "hooking up culture", kink and the like is acceptable. LGBT lifestyles even polyamory are seen as acceptable expressions of one's gender/sexuality. Sex workers are acceptable and should not be stigmatized. Porn is ubiquitous. Given these trends, it is not surprise that many young women are willing to be sugar babies.
Your "yuck" reactions sounds like something from the 20th century. I'm not saying your wrong, maybe society would be better off with 20th century attitudes towards sex.
A question for the pp who said "yuck", why is one's dignity lost if they have freely choose to have sex for money?

No mentally healthy woman with good self esteem and a promising future would do this.

Not one.

Trading sex for money reduces women to their cavities, and makes them commodities. The man with power and money rents the most private parts of her body. Sad and twisted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. I'd say half my friends (I'm male, in my 40s) do this, and that's just the ones who admit to it. We're all in the higher income level (entrepreneurs, finance, lawyers).

Are you one of them?

Where did you meet these friends? College? Grow up together? At work? I'm wondering what i the common denominator. I'm also in my 40s and higher income level (lawyers) and I don't know anyone doing this.
And what are the demographics of their wives? Equivalent education and income level to your friends? I just can't imagine in my social circles the wives not noticing a substantial financial outlay.

Some I've know for years, some more recent. Eveyone in my circle is college educated and usually a masters. Wives tend to be career types also.

When you have a high HHI, no one is noticing $1-2k every month. Besides, you usually have a bunch of different accounts and credit cards at that level. No one has time to dig through all that.

$1-2k a month? That’s it?!?

Remember college girls aren't doing it for a living. Your typical GW student (GW is #1 in the DC area in terms of % of undergrads who do this) has all her tuition and room and board covered by her parents. This is fun money to buy fancy clothes, and also just fun to go out with someone mature and wealthy.

Umm just get a real job, then. You can’t find a job that will pay you $250 a week? Willing to lose your dignity and have sex with an old guy... eww. I was poor in college and worked my way through an Ivy. No way would I consider $1-2k a month to have sex with a guy in his 40s. No one I knew would have done it either. Just yuck.

There are entire websites with thousands of young women willing to "Lose their dignity" for $$. What the sugar baby trend and the OnlyFans trend show is that many young women are willing to trade their sexuality for $$. They have grown up in an era where casual sex "hooking up culture", kink and the like is acceptable. LGBT lifestyles even polyamory are seen as acceptable expressions of one's gender/sexuality. Sex workers are acceptable and should not be stigmatized. Porn is ubiquitous. Given these trends, it is not surprise that many young women are willing to be sugar babies.
Your "yuck" reactions sounds like something from the 20th century. I'm not saying your wrong, maybe society would be better off with 20th century attitudes towards sex.
A question for the pp who said "yuck", why is one's dignity lost if they have freely choose to have sex for money?

No mentally healthy woman with good self esteem and a promising future would do this.

Not one.

Trading sex for money reduces women to their cavities, and makes them commodities. The man with power and money rents the most private parts of her body. Sad and twisted.

But if that woman was going to have sex with a guy she's not interested in ANYWAY, what do you care if he pays her car note?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:male 40s high income, 12yrs married, two kids. not much marital sex but otherwise nice marriage. i use sugar to satisfy a need and ease the resentment at home. i can be a good husband while getting my needs met in a NSA arrangement that has little chance of getting ugly (no real emotional entanglements) .. DW and I haven't discussed this but I think she may suspect this because she knows I have always been as horny as fkc at the same time I don't think we are technically DADT either. sugar is also much safer and less "eww" than going for the real pros (hookers, happy ending massages etc) .... plus in the DC area the sugar babies are generally collage girls (educated) and "interesting" outside of the few mins of sex.
'

Sure, you are a good husband.

And you are kidding yourself that you are almost not lying to your wife about this.

So sad that you are paying young women who will be ashamed for the rest of their lives that they had to stoop to servicing you for money.

This guy is definitely a bad husband, but I don't think the women have anything to be ashamed of. And, as I said above, based on my friends in college who did this, they are not losing sleep over it and it hasn't affected their lives. And they wouldn't have called it "stooping to service men for money" they would call it, "having the same sex they were going to have anyway."

Let’s see if you are right:

> do they list this on their resume?
> do they tell their parents?
> do they reveal this to any guys who they hope would marry them?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My wealthyish 40s single friend did it a few times. He was a gentleman and took them to dinner, paid for a hotel, but said it was just not worth the money. Sometimes they showed up dressed like high end escorts, and it was embarrassing to be in public with them. An average looking middle age guy might want a beautiful companion, but you don't want everyone near you to assume it is an arrangement.

It WAS an arrangement.

He is a gentleman . He was disappointed that the prostitutes had had hired would not play along with that facade.

Should have read NOT a gentleman

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Sugar???”

Stop with the euphemisms.

If you have to use them, be aware that what you are doing is gross.

That's what it's called.

This is like saying we should only call it "sexual intercourse".

Prostitution?

Sex with?

[Anonymous]

* sex work