If adults kids don’t have kids what’s the point?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I suspect the ones clamoring for grandchildren are also the least likely to help out with babysitting or to visit. They just want the status symbol of telling their friends how many grandkids they have and don't want to help out current parents in a world that has made it much harder to raise children than they experienced.

Why should we help out? Our parents did not help us neither did any previous generation parents since dawn of time.

My grandparents had 8 kids and we lived 3,000 miles away yet somehow my mom had four kids and me three kids. Today the precious snowflakes wit two kids except both grandparents helping, daycare, babysitters, after school programs, summer camps. Raise your own damn kids.

All I ask, marry well, have 2-3 kids, buy a house and have me over thanksgiving, Xmas, kids birthday parties. I am not your servant. I raises my kids.

All I ask… as if it’s a tiny thing! Those are huge asks! Why would you ask that they marry or have kids (specifically 2-3 kids)? You’re correct in that you’re not their servant but perhaps in the same way, neither are they yours. They get to choose their life and if you want, you can be happy for them and support their choices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I suspect the ones clamoring for grandchildren are also the least likely to help out with babysitting or to visit. They just want the status symbol of telling their friends how many grandkids they have and don't want to help out current parents in a world that has made it much harder to raise children than they experienced.

Why should we help out? Our parents did not help us neither did any previous generation parents since dawn of time.

My grandparents had 8 kids and we lived 3,000 miles away yet somehow my mom had four kids and me three kids. Today the precious snowflakes wit two kids except both grandparents helping, daycare, babysitters, after school programs, summer camps. Raise your own damn kids.

All I ask, marry well, have 2-3 kids, buy a house and have me over thanksgiving, Xmas, kids birthday parties. I am not your servant. I raises my kids.

All I ask… as if it’s a tiny thing! Those are huge asks! Why would you ask that they marry or have kids (specifically 2-3 kids)? You’re correct in that you’re not their servant but perhaps in the same way, neither are they yours. They get to choose their life and if you want, you can be happy for them and support their choices.

Less than two is weird and more than four is a cult. Pretty much 2-3 is normal. Honestly two is bare minimum for a couple to break even.

I assume a married women with no kids she is the in the closet guys beard. Or worse he will run off at 55 with a 35 year old and start a family

I have a creepy cousin around 63 with his 62 year old wife. No kids. His sister has three. His dad still alive. It is weird in their place. Got that old people waiting to die smell with no kids

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I suspect the ones clamoring for grandchildren are also the least likely to help out with babysitting or to visit. They just want the status symbol of telling their friends how many grandkids they have and don't want to help out current parents in a world that has made it much harder to raise children than they experienced.

Why should we help out? Our parents did not help us neither did any previous generation parents since dawn of time.

My grandparents had 8 kids and we lived 3,000 miles away yet somehow my mom had four kids and me three kids. Today the precious snowflakes wit two kids except both grandparents helping, daycare, babysitters, after school programs, summer camps. Raise your own damn kids.

All I ask, marry well, have 2-3 kids, buy a house and have me over thanksgiving, Xmas, kids birthday parties. I am not your servant. I raises my kids.

Oh yes let me bully my my children into having grandchildren that I will ignore all year and then want to socialize twice a year for the culturally mandated times when you're expected to want to spend time with family and then go back to ignoring them.

Isn't the point of wanting to have grandchildren is wanting to have a relationship with the grandchildren?

Involved in your grandchildren's life does not mean that you are raising them for the parents. I am absolutely willing to bet that you op hired childcare at some point. And if you didn't it's not like you're going to get some magical gold star for never hiring a babysitter or having family help out

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I suspect the ones clamoring for grandchildren are also the least likely to help out with babysitting or to visit. They just want the status symbol of telling their friends how many grandkids they have and don't want to help out current parents in a world that has made it much harder to raise children than they experienced.

Why should we help out? Our parents did not help us neither did any previous generation parents since dawn of time.

My grandparents had 8 kids and we lived 3,000 miles away yet somehow my mom had four kids and me three kids. Today the precious snowflakes wit two kids except both grandparents helping, daycare, babysitters, after school programs, summer camps. Raise your own damn kids.

All I ask, marry well, have 2-3 kids, buy a house and have me over thanksgiving, Xmas, kids birthday parties. I am not your servant. I raises my kids.

Oh yes let me bully my my children into having grandchildren that I will ignore all year and then want to socialize twice a year for the culturally mandated times when you're expected to want to spend time with family and then go back to ignoring them.

Isn't the point of wanting to have grandchildren is wanting to have a relationship with the grandchildren?

Involved in your grandchildren's life does not mean that you are raising them for the parents. I am absolutely willing to bet that you op hired childcare at some point. And if you didn't it's not like you're going to get some magical gold star for never hiring a babysitter or having family help out

OP for my three kids I never hired a babysitter or had childcare once. We saw grandparents at our house or a venues for bigger events when we threw birthday parties, baptisms, communions, sweet 16s and graduations. They did host Xmas each year and we went over their Mother’s Day, Father’s Day and their birthdays. They raised their kids not their job to raise our kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I suspect the ones clamoring for grandchildren are also the least likely to help out with babysitting or to visit. They just want the status symbol of telling their friends how many grandkids they have and don't want to help out current parents in a world that has made it much harder to raise children than they experienced.

Why should we help out? Our parents did not help us neither did any previous generation parents since dawn of time.

My grandparents had 8 kids and we lived 3,000 miles away yet somehow my mom had four kids and me three kids. Today the precious snowflakes wit two kids except both grandparents helping, daycare, babysitters, after school programs, summer camps. Raise your own damn kids.

All I ask, marry well, have 2-3 kids, buy a house and have me over thanksgiving, Xmas, kids birthday parties. I am not your servant. I raises my kids.

Oh yes let me bully my my children into having grandchildren that I will ignore all year and then want to socialize twice a year for the culturally mandated times when you're expected to want to spend time with family and then go back to ignoring them.

Isn't the point of wanting to have grandchildren is wanting to have a relationship with the grandchildren?

Involved in your grandchildren's life does not mean that you are raising them for the parents. I am absolutely willing to bet that you op hired childcare at some point. And if you didn't it's not like you're going to get some magical gold star for never hiring a babysitter or having family help out

OP for my three kids I never hired a babysitter or had childcare once. We saw grandparents at our house or a venues for bigger events when we threw birthday parties, baptisms, communions, sweet 16s and graduations. They did host Xmas each year and we went over their Mother’s Day, Father’s Day and their birthdays. They raised their kids not their job to raise our kids.

That has got to be the biggest lie on the face of the Earth that you never once had a babysitter.

It's also kind of sad did the grandparents only got to see their grandchildren like four or five times a year and apparently didn't want to spend any more time with them than that. (Or less because you would be switching between sets of grandparents)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I suspect the ones clamoring for grandchildren are also the least likely to help out with babysitting or to visit. They just want the status symbol of telling their friends how many grandkids they have and don't want to help out current parents in a world that has made it much harder to raise children than they experienced.

Why should we help out? Our parents did not help us neither did any previous generation parents since dawn of time.

My grandparents had 8 kids and we lived 3,000 miles away yet somehow my mom had four kids and me three kids. Today the precious snowflakes wit two kids except both grandparents helping, daycare, babysitters, after school programs, summer camps. Raise your own damn kids.

All I ask, marry well, have 2-3 kids, buy a house and have me over thanksgiving, Xmas, kids birthday parties. I am not your servant. I raises my kids.

Oh yes let me bully my my children into having grandchildren that I will ignore all year and then want to socialize twice a year for the culturally mandated times when you're expected to want to spend time with family and then go back to ignoring them.

Isn't the point of wanting to have grandchildren is wanting to have a relationship with the grandchildren?

Involved in your grandchildren's life does not mean that you are raising them for the parents. I am absolutely willing to bet that you op hired childcare at some point. And if you didn't it's not like you're going to get some magical gold star for never hiring a babysitter or having family help out

OP for my three kids I never hired a babysitter or had childcare once. We saw grandparents at our house or a venues for bigger events when we threw birthday parties, baptisms, communions, sweet 16s and graduations. They did host Xmas each year and we went over their Mother’s Day, Father’s Day and their birthdays. They raised their kids not their job to raise our kids.

Basically you never hired any childcare because either you had like massive anxiety around other people taking care of your children and or massive control issues. Proby why you didn't want to have the grandparents spend any time with the grandkids outside of major holidays because again they might have some sort of outside influence on your children

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I suspect the ones clamoring for grandchildren are also the least likely to help out with babysitting or to visit. They just want the status symbol of telling their friends how many grandkids they have and don't want to help out current parents in a world that has made it much harder to raise children than they experienced.

Why should we help out? Our parents did not help us neither did any previous generation parents since dawn of time.

My grandparents had 8 kids and we lived 3,000 miles away yet somehow my mom had four kids and me three kids. Today the precious snowflakes wit two kids except both grandparents helping, daycare, babysitters, after school programs, summer camps. Raise your own damn kids.

All I ask, marry well, have 2-3 kids, buy a house and have me over thanksgiving, Xmas, kids birthday parties. I am not your servant. I raises my kids.

Oh yes let me bully my my children into having grandchildren that I will ignore all year and then want to socialize twice a year for the culturally mandated times when you're expected to want to spend time with family and then go back to ignoring them.

Isn't the point of wanting to have grandchildren is wanting to have a relationship with the grandchildren?

Involved in your grandchildren's life does not mean that you are raising them for the parents. I am absolutely willing to bet that you op hired childcare at some point. And if you didn't it's not like you're going to get some magical gold star for never hiring a babysitter or having family help out

OP for my three kids I never hired a babysitter or had childcare once. We saw grandparents at our house or a venues for bigger events when we threw birthday parties, baptisms, communions, sweet 16s and graduations. They did host Xmas each year and we went over their Mother’s Day, Father’s Day and their birthdays. They raised their kids not their job to raise our kids.

My parents and my husband's parents have offered to take care of their grandchildren on occasion because they actually enjoy spending time with their grandchildren and they understand the importance of parents having a break to go out for a childfree dinner or see a show. It's strange to me that you think that occasionally getting childcare is the same thing as expecting other people to raise your children and I'm sorry that you did not have support. Maybe that gave you a self aggrandizing attitude that you were the only person who could take care of your children

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I suspect the ones clamoring for grandchildren are also the least likely to help out with babysitting or to visit. They just want the status symbol of telling their friends how many grandkids they have and don't want to help out current parents in a world that has made it much harder to raise children than they experienced.

Why should we help out? Our parents did not help us neither did any previous generation parents since dawn of time.

My grandparents had 8 kids and we lived 3,000 miles away yet somehow my mom had four kids and me three kids. Today the precious snowflakes wit two kids except both grandparents helping, daycare, babysitters, after school programs, summer camps. Raise your own damn kids.

All I ask, marry well, have 2-3 kids, buy a house and have me over thanksgiving, Xmas, kids birthday parties. I am not your servant. I raises my kids.

Oh yes let me bully my my children into having grandchildren that I will ignore all year and then want to socialize twice a year for the culturally mandated times when you're expected to want to spend time with family and then go back to ignoring them.

Isn't the point of wanting to have grandchildren is wanting to have a relationship with the grandchildren?

Involved in your grandchildren's life does not mean that you are raising them for the parents. I am absolutely willing to bet that you op hired childcare at some point. And if you didn't it's not like you're going to get some magical gold star for never hiring a babysitter or having family help out

OP for my three kids I never hired a babysitter or had childcare once. We saw grandparents at our house or a venues for bigger events when we threw birthday parties, baptisms, communions, sweet 16s and graduations. They did host Xmas each year and we went over their Mother’s Day, Father’s Day and their birthdays. They raised their kids not their job to raise our kids.

My parents and my husband's parents have offered to take care of their grandchildren on occasion because they actually enjoy spending time with their grandchildren and they understand the importance of parents having a break to go out for a childfree dinner or see a show. It's strange to me that you think that occasionally getting childcare is the same thing as expecting other people to raise your children and I'm sorry that you did not have support. Maybe that gave you a self aggrandizing attitude that you were the only person who could take care of your children

You do realize people with multiple kids don’t have money for babysitters and date nights when kids young.

My parents dead and my in-laws have nine grandkids and one great grandkid. Plus they had jobs when kids little. My mother in law oldest grandchild was 23 when she retired. But some years I had three birthday parties, graduations, communions and Father’s Day Mother’s Day their birthdays I see them 10x a year. Thank god we are back to once a year!! We moved out of state.

I’m only met my grandparents twice in my life both before age of 8. But no worries I have 40 first cousins!!! And my grandparents never baby sat any of them!!

[Anonymous]

I will just leave 1/4 my money directly to granddads and other 2/4 trust fund great grandkids and other 1/4 trust fund great great grandkids all in 21st birthday to be used pay off student loans and first time home. All back in pot of unspent for future generations.

I only have ten million but imagine compounding effect on that final 1/4.

Adults kids don’t need money with or without kids

Not payable till 21 on student loans and housing not payable to married with at least one kid and over 25 and obtained college level degree.

[Anonymous]

I mean my grandma had 7 kids. 4 girls and 3 boys. Only 2 boys had kids and only 2 girls had kids. My mom wanted more but since my dad was an irresponsible f*ck she didn't want that many with him. Honestly, kids have issues. My aunts and uncles without kids seem to have had the most relaxed lives but they did attract an opportunistic materialistic bunch.

[Anonymous]

I totally get how you feel OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I suspect the ones clamoring for grandchildren are also the least likely to help out with babysitting or to visit. They just want the status symbol of telling their friends how many grandkids they have and don't want to help out current parents in a world that has made it much harder to raise children than they experienced.

Why should we help out? Our parents did not help us neither did any previous generation parents since dawn of time.

My grandparents had 8 kids and we lived 3,000 miles away yet somehow my mom had four kids and me three kids. Today the precious snowflakes wit two kids except both grandparents helping, daycare, babysitters, after school programs, summer camps. Raise your own damn kids.

All I ask, marry well, have 2-3 kids, buy a house and have me over thanksgiving, Xmas, kids birthday parties. I am not your servant. I raises my kids.

All I ask… as if it’s a tiny thing! Those are huge asks! Why would you ask that they marry or have kids (specifically 2-3 kids)? You’re correct in that you’re not their servant but perhaps in the same way, neither are they yours. They get to choose their life and if you want, you can be happy for them and support their choices.

Less than two is weird and more than four is a cult. Pretty much 2-3 is normal. Honestly two is bare minimum for a couple to break even.

I assume a married women with no kids she is the in the closet guys beard. Or worse he will run off at 55 with a 35 year old and start a family

I have a creepy cousin around 63 with his 62 year old wife. No kids. His sister has three. His dad still alive. It is weird in their place. Got that old people waiting to die smell with no kids

It’s clear from your post who the weird one is.

Assuming every woman must have children and there is something wrong if a couple doesn’t want to have children is some right wing fundamentalist bull crap. Go troll somewhere else. No one buys that load of horse shite here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP - my kids may have kids yet. Buy I had a brother who literally worked 60 hours a week for 40 years to make a ton of money and his wife stayed home running around with kid, paying college, paying grad school, paying for wedding.

After all that they announce the decided not to have kids. (Why even get married?)

My brother sold the family home, (no point having it as no Xmas or Thanksgiving or family parties with a house full of grandkids), sold his collector car he loved as no grand kid to leave it to.

They retired to a HOA in Florida with their now “worthless” millions. No one to leave it to. They go to early bird special, play golf. Soon their DNA will disappear along with their branch of the family tree.

Would it have killed their daughter just to pop out a kid or two?

My brother aged 10 years overnight. His entire 40 years of work means nothing and his wife doming multiple rounds of fertility treatment to have kid and quitting work to be a SAHM now all meaningless

The reality is that op hates her own children. There is no way she has a good relationship with them.

[Anonymous]

Do you think it matters where you live and what schools kids go to that determines whether they will marry and have kids? I'm considering moving away. I wonder if it's just a mega city problem. There are lots of people in small towns and the military that pop out tons of kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I suspect the ones clamoring for grandchildren are also the least likely to help out with babysitting or to visit. They just want the status symbol of telling their friends how many grandkids they have and don't want to help out current parents in a world that has made it much harder to raise children than they experienced.

Why should we help out? Our parents did not help us neither did any previous generation parents since dawn of time.

My grandparents had 8 kids and we lived 3,000 miles away yet somehow my mom had four kids and me three kids. Today the precious snowflakes wit two kids except both grandparents helping, daycare, babysitters, after school programs, summer camps. Raise your own damn kids.

All I ask, marry well, have 2-3 kids, buy a house and have me over thanksgiving, Xmas, kids birthday parties. I am not your servant. I raises my kids.

All I ask . . . just these little things. LOL. My parents never helped us either. Not even a little. Nor do DHs. They get to ask nothing of us. ANd you, frankly, don't deserve it.

You sound like you were a peach to have as a parent, btw.