Was accidentally on a group text...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK, OP here. I replied with Wow - had no idea you felt that way about my kid. And hate finding out this way.

The texter replied - "I'm sorry. Having a bad day and he was really loud last time we were together. Not personal. Must be too much time with family this weekend" with a stressed wine emoji.

So I guess that's that...

She sounds like a super bitch.

Maybe, but I want to hear more about this last time you were all together, OP. What were the circumstances and were you aware then that your son might have been annoying other people?

Oh my god. It literally does not matter. There is nothing that kid could have done that would make what text lady did okay. Why is this so hard for people to understand.

This. It's the kind of remark that I would totally make in private to my husband about an annoying kid. But never to a whole crowd or virtual crowd. If text lady had said the same thing to her husband during a Zoom because she mistakenly thought she was on mute, I would be much more sympathetic to her but would still expect a profuse apology and would make one myself if it was me.

My guess is that this kid has been the topic of many texts between the group.

If so, that just means that there are more jerks than one. Saying unkind things to one's spouse or other close confidant one-on-one (which we all do to vent) is totally different than trashing someone to a group of people to get laughs.

I wonder if maybe there was a group text going on simultaneously while mean texter lady was also texting a close confidant within the group and she got her wires crossed. I can see myself doing something stupid like that and feeling like a total idiot. At that point, it’s worse to admit that you meant for it to go to someone else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK, OP here. I replied with Wow - had no idea you felt that way about my kid. And hate finding out this way.

The texter replied - "I'm sorry. Having a bad day and he was really loud last time we were together. Not personal. Must be too much time with family this weekend" with a stressed wine emoji.

So I guess that's that...

She sounds like a super bitch.

Maybe, but I want to hear more about this last time you were all together, OP. What were the circumstances and were you aware then that your son might have been annoying other people?

Oh my god. It literally does not matter. There is nothing that kid could have done that would make what text lady did okay. Why is this so hard for people to understand.

This. It's the kind of remark that I would totally make in private to my husband about an annoying kid. But never to a whole crowd or virtual crowd. If text lady had said the same thing to her husband during a Zoom because she mistakenly thought she was on mute, I would be much more sympathetic to her but would still expect a profuse apology and would make one myself if it was me.

My guess is that this kid has been the topic of many texts between the group.

If so, that just means that there are more jerks than one. Saying unkind things to one's spouse or other close confidant one-on-one (which we all do to vent) is totally different than trashing someone to a group of people to get laughs.

While I agree one-on-one complaints may not be nice, but totally different than a group complaint, we don't actually know that she meant to send the text to the whole group. I have by mistake intended to text one friend and they happened to be part of a recent group text so their name in the group text popped up first and by accident texted the group (fortunately much smaller group and just involved some irrelevant info for the other people.)

[Anonymous]

Total mean girl crap and a terrible “apology.”

I have a friend with “that kid” and I have spoken to ONE other mom about him in a private, in-person setting. It’s usually something like “that kid is sweet but his behavior problems have made my kid’s experience so difficult in class, I feel really bad for his mom because I know she’s trying so hard, I need to bring her some wine.”

Yeah we all know about “that kid” but how you talk about people is a reflection of you, not the child. Everybody is trying their best and there is no need to be mean, especially about kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK, OP here. I replied with Wow - had no idea you felt that way about my kid. And hate finding out this way.

The texter replied - "I'm sorry. Having a bad day and he was really loud last time we were together. Not personal. Must be too much time with family this weekend" with a stressed wine emoji.

So I guess that's that...

She sounds like a super bitch.

Maybe, but I want to hear more about this last time you were all together, OP. What were the circumstances and were you aware then that your son might have been annoying other people?

Oh my god. It literally does not matter. There is nothing that kid could have done that would make what text lady did okay. Why is this so hard for people to understand.

This. It's the kind of remark that I would totally make in private to my husband about an annoying kid. But never to a whole crowd or virtual crowd. If text lady had said the same thing to her husband during a Zoom because she mistakenly thought she was on mute, I would be much more sympathetic to her but would still expect a profuse apology and would make one myself if it was me.

My guess is that this kid has been the topic of many texts between the group.

If so, that just means that there are more jerks than one. Saying unkind things to one's spouse or other close confidant one-on-one (which we all do to vent) is totally different than trashing someone to a group of people to get laughs.

I wonder if maybe there was a group text going on simultaneously while mean texter lady was also texting a close confidant within the group and she got her wires crossed. I can see myself doing something stupid like that and feeling like a total idiot. At that point, it’s worse to admit that you meant for it to go to someone else.

You can apologize profusely without admitting the whole truth. "I'm so sorry! That was a totally inappropriate and unkind joke on my part!" Etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Total mean girl crap and a terrible “apology.”

I have a friend with “that kid” and I have spoken to ONE other mom about him in a private, in-person setting. It’s usually something like “that kid is sweet but his behavior problems have made my kid’s experience so difficult in class, I feel really bad for his mom because I know she’s trying so hard, I need to bring her some wine.”

Yeah we all know about “that kid” but how you talk about people is a reflection of you, not the child. Everybody is trying their best and there is no need to be mean, especially about kids.

What if you know that she's not "trying so hard"? Friends who hang out with her often would see this for themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK, OP here. I replied with Wow - had no idea you felt that way about my kid. And hate finding out this way.

The texter replied - "I'm sorry. Having a bad day and he was really loud last time we were together. Not personal. Must be too much time with family this weekend" with a stressed wine emoji.

So I guess that's that...

She sounds like a super bitch.

Maybe, but I want to hear more about this last time you were all together, OP. What were the circumstances and were you aware then that your son might have been annoying other people?

Oh my god. It literally does not matter. There is nothing that kid could have done that would make what text lady did okay. Why is this so hard for people to understand.

This. It's the kind of remark that I would totally make in private to my husband about an annoying kid. But never to a whole crowd or virtual crowd. If text lady had said the same thing to her husband during a Zoom because she mistakenly thought she was on mute, I would be much more sympathetic to her but would still expect a profuse apology and would make one myself if it was me.

My guess is that this kid has been the topic of many texts between the group.

The unkindness isn't great but it's not like what she said isn't true, and OP hasn't had much to say about that. Anyone with a modicum of self-awareness knows when their kid is THAT KID and hard for other parents to have around.

👏🏼WHAT DONT YALL UNDERSTAND 👏🏼 Even if the kid is “that kid” it is not okay what she did! It was immature, high school Regina George crap but mean mom version. If that’s how she feels about the kid, fine. There are kids in our social circle I find kind of annoying. But they aren’t bad kids or deserving to be put down in a group text of other mean moms. Those convos are reserved for your spouse while doing the dishes in the privacy of your home. What she did was wrong. There’s no take away for OP except that the woman and others in the text are a pile of snakes. Period.

+1. Adults gossiping about children aren’t happy people, and the gossip is a reflection of the adults issues, not the kid.

I wonder if the texter didn't know exactly what she was doing, and didn't want to deal with OP's kid any more.

[Anonymous]

Adults gossiping about kids are most definitely the very definition of lovers.

You know what this thread makes me grateful for this Thankgiving weekend? That i don't have loser friends

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Total mean girl crap and a terrible “apology.”

I have a friend with “that kid” and I have spoken to ONE other mom about him in a private, in-person setting. It’s usually something like “that kid is sweet but his behavior problems have made my kid’s experience so difficult in class, I feel really bad for his mom because I know she’s trying so hard, I need to bring her some wine.”

Yeah we all know about “that kid” but how you talk about people is a reflection of you, not the child. Everybody is trying their best and there is no need to be mean, especially about kids.

What if you know that she's not "trying so hard"? Friends who hang out with her often would see this for themselves.

Because I’m friends with his mom and I know she is trying so hard.

[Anonymous]

I did something similar, though NOT about a child. Jesus Chrisr, you people who think this is OK are trash.

When I did this ( it was about a friend's controlling douchebag of a husband) and accidentally assumed my friend to the text trashing her DH i was beyond horrified. I wanted to crawl in a hole with compete and utter shame. I called said friend and begged for forgiveness for my horrible behavior. She luckily accepted it.

This was a huge wake up call to me. Gossip is never ok. It is classless, rude and extremely hurtful.

The "friend" in this situation is a piece of trash

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK, OP here. I replied with Wow - had no idea you felt that way about my kid. And hate finding out this way.

The texter replied - "I'm sorry. Having a bad day and he was really loud last time we were together. Not personal. Must be too much time with family this weekend" with a stressed wine emoji.

So I guess that's that...

She sounds like a super bitch.

Maybe, but I want to hear more about this last time you were all together, OP. What were the circumstances and were you aware then that your son might have been annoying other people?

Oh my god. It literally does not matter. There is nothing that kid could have done that would make what text lady did okay. Why is this so hard for people to understand.

This. It's the kind of remark that I would totally make in private to my husband about an annoying kid. But never to a whole crowd or virtual crowd. If text lady had said the same thing to her husband during a Zoom because she mistakenly thought she was on mute, I would be much more sympathetic to her but would still expect a profuse apology and would make one myself if it was me.

My guess is that this kid has been the topic of many texts between the group.

The unkindness isn't great but it's not like what she said isn't true, and OP hasn't had much to say about that. Anyone with a modicum of self-awareness knows when their kid is THAT KID and hard for other parents to have around.

👏🏼WHAT DONT YALL UNDERSTAND 👏🏼 Even if the kid is “that kid” it is not okay what she did! It was immature, high school Regina George crap but mean mom version. If that’s how she feels about the kid, fine. There are kids in our social circle I find kind of annoying. But they aren’t bad kids or deserving to be put down in a group text of other mean moms. Those convos are reserved for your spouse while doing the dishes in the privacy of your home. What she did was wrong. There’s no take away for OP except that the woman and others in the text are a pile of snakes. Period.

+1. Adults gossiping about children aren’t happy people, and the gossip is a reflection of the adults issues, not the kid.

I wonder if the texter didn't know exactly what she was doing, and didn't want to deal with OP's kid any more.

She may have volunteered to take one for the team. I also suggest accidentally getting the time, date, or location of the next play date wrong “by accident”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK, OP here. I replied with Wow - had no idea you felt that way about my kid. And hate finding out this way.

The texter replied - "I'm sorry. Having a bad day and he was really loud last time we were together. Not personal. Must be too much time with family this weekend" with a stressed wine emoji.

So I guess that's that...

She sounds like a super bitch.

Maybe, but I want to hear more about this last time you were all together, OP. What were the circumstances and were you aware then that your son might have been annoying other people?

Oh my god. It literally does not matter. There is nothing that kid could have done that would make what text lady did okay. Why is this so hard for people to understand.

This. It's the kind of remark that I would totally make in private to my husband about an annoying kid. But never to a whole crowd or virtual crowd. If text lady had said the same thing to her husband during a Zoom because she mistakenly thought she was on mute, I would be much more sympathetic to her but would still expect a profuse apology and would make one myself if it was me.

My guess is that this kid has been the topic of many texts between the group.

The unkindness isn't great but it's not like what she said isn't true, and OP hasn't had much to say about that. Anyone with a modicum of self-awareness knows when their kid is THAT KID and hard for other parents to have around.

👏🏼WHAT DONT YALL UNDERSTAND 👏🏼 Even if the kid is “that kid” it is not okay what she did! It was immature, high school Regina George crap but mean mom version. If that’s how she feels about the kid, fine. There are kids in our social circle I find kind of annoying. But they aren’t bad kids or deserving to be put down in a group text of other mean moms. Those convos are reserved for your spouse while doing the dishes in the privacy of your home. What she did was wrong. There’s no take away for OP except that the woman and others in the text are a pile of snakes. Period.

+1. Adults gossiping about children aren’t happy people, and the gossip is a reflection of the adults issues, not the kid.

I wonder if the texter didn't know exactly what she was doing, and didn't want to deal with OP's kid any more.

She may have volunteered to take one for the team. I also suggest accidentally getting the time, date, or location of the next play date wrong “by accident”.

Ok, now that’s way, way worse than what mean texter did.

[Anonymous]

Op I’m so sorry. I can’t believe what a non-apology she gave. I mean really can’t believe it. It was like she shrugged her shoulders. She is clearly not a very empathic person (which is why she can’t empathize that some people’s kids might be having a hard day, or be a louder kid etc). This is all hurtful and reading this thread and her texts is the kind of thing that always reminds me we really shouldn’t be surprised when middle school and high school is filled with kids who make mean comments and sometimes even bully. They learn at home to be more worried about themselves than others. Even her response was all about her. So yeah your child might be hard sometimes but empathic parents know that most of us will have at least one of our kids struggle at some point, and we hope that others will have empathy for us when that time comes too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK, OP here. I replied with Wow - had no idea you felt that way about my kid. And hate finding out this way.

The texter replied - "I'm sorry. Having a bad day and he was really loud last time we were together. Not personal. Must be too much time with family this weekend" with a stressed wine emoji.

So I guess that's that...

She sounds like a super bitch.

Maybe, but I want to hear more about this last time you were all together, OP. What were the circumstances and were you aware then that your son might have been annoying other people?

Oh my god. It literally does not matter. There is nothing that kid could have done that would make what text lady did okay. Why is this so hard for people to understand.

This. It's the kind of remark that I would totally make in private to my husband about an annoying kid. But never to a whole crowd or virtual crowd. If text lady had said the same thing to her husband during a Zoom because she mistakenly thought she was on mute, I would be much more sympathetic to her but would still expect a profuse apology and would make one myself if it was me.

My guess is that this kid has been the topic of many texts between the group.

The unkindness isn't great but it's not like what she said isn't true, and OP hasn't had much to say about that. Anyone with a modicum of self-awareness knows when their kid is THAT KID and hard for other parents to have around.

👏🏼WHAT DONT YALL UNDERSTAND 👏🏼 Even if the kid is “that kid” it is not okay what she did! It was immature, high school Regina George crap but mean mom version. If that’s how she feels about the kid, fine. There are kids in our social circle I find kind of annoying. But they aren’t bad kids or deserving to be put down in a group text of other mean moms. Those convos are reserved for your spouse while doing the dishes in the privacy of your home. What she did was wrong. There’s no take away for OP except that the woman and others in the text are a pile of snakes. Period.

+1. Adults gossiping about children aren’t happy people, and the gossip is a reflection of the adults issues, not the kid.

I wonder if the texter didn't know exactly what she was doing, and didn't want to deal with OP's kid any more.

She may have volunteered to take one for the team. I also suggest accidentally getting the time, date, or location of the next play date wrong “by accident”.

Ok, now that’s way, way worse than what mean texter did.

Needs must. No one should be held captive by the behavior of one child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK, OP here. I replied with Wow - had no idea you felt that way about my kid. And hate finding out this way.

The texter replied - "I'm sorry. Having a bad day and he was really loud last time we were together. Not personal. Must be too much time with family this weekend" with a stressed wine emoji.

So I guess that's that...

She sounds like a super bitch.

Maybe, but I want to hear more about this last time you were all together, OP. What were the circumstances and were you aware then that your son might have been annoying other people?

Oh my god. It literally does not matter. There is nothing that kid could have done that would make what text lady did okay. Why is this so hard for people to understand.

This. It's the kind of remark that I would totally make in private to my husband about an annoying kid. But never to a whole crowd or virtual crowd. If text lady had said the same thing to her husband during a Zoom because she mistakenly thought she was on mute, I would be much more sympathetic to her but would still expect a profuse apology and would make one myself if it was me.

My guess is that this kid has been the topic of many texts between the group.

The unkindness isn't great but it's not like what she said isn't true, and OP hasn't had much to say about that. Anyone with a modicum of self-awareness knows when their kid is THAT KID and hard for other parents to have around.

👏🏼WHAT DONT YALL UNDERSTAND 👏🏼 Even if the kid is “that kid” it is not okay what she did! It was immature, high school Regina George crap but mean mom version. If that’s how she feels about the kid, fine. There are kids in our social circle I find kind of annoying. But they aren’t bad kids or deserving to be put down in a group text of other mean moms. Those convos are reserved for your spouse while doing the dishes in the privacy of your home. What she did was wrong. There’s no take away for OP except that the woman and others in the text are a pile of snakes. Period.

Well, IIRC, we don’t have proof that the other women have participated in gossip, do we? Just uncomfortable silence, or not being near their phones.

[Anonymous]

You people are the mean girls that people on DCUM complain about.