Was accidentally on a group text...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I’ll be honest I have never been so invested in a DCUM thread. Team OP.

Same!! I find myself coming back to check for updates and more people yelling at each other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s a boy in our neighborhood I find somewhat annoying. He’s extremely extroverted, loud, always goofing off and coming up with silly stories etc...he’s definitely “that” kid. Even then, I would never in 100 million years say anything negative about him to any of the other moms in our social circle. In fact even though he’s a little bit too much personality for me, I recognize the fact that his creativity and fearlessness around people will do him well later in life and he will probably do well in college and have a great career. His mother is lovely and frankly there’s no parenting this big personality out of the kid. It’s just who he is.

I guess my larger point is just because a child gets on your nerves doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with them. It’s a clash of personalities. And you should never be gossiping about children with other parents. It’s mean girls all grown up. How is this so hard for others in this thread to understand?

Or he will continue to be obnoxious and off-putting to people and be perfectly average.

Look, the mom was rude. I'd say something to her. I'd also take it as maybe a pause moment to evaluate if maybe I need to reign my kid in a bit more.

And while loud chatty kids aren't bad lets not be silly and start the narrative that they're all destined to be super stars.

+1

+2 finally a sensible, balanced comment.

I didn’t get the impression that OP’s kid is “chatty”. I’m sure she would have clarified if that was the case. I was thinking obnoxiously loud, shouting, getting into things, running around when it’s not appropriate, being rough with toys and other kids, etc.

Chatty is something else entirely.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s a boy in our neighborhood I find somewhat annoying. He’s extremely extroverted, loud, always goofing off and coming up with silly stories etc...he’s definitely “that” kid. Even then, I would never in 100 million years say anything negative about him to any of the other moms in our social circle. In fact even though he’s a little bit too much personality for me, I recognize the fact that his creativity and fearlessness around people will do him well later in life and he will probably do well in college and have a great career. His mother is lovely and frankly there’s no parenting this big personality out of the kid. It’s just who he is.

I guess my larger point is just because a child gets on your nerves doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with them. It’s a clash of personalities. And you should never be gossiping about children with other parents. It’s mean girls all grown up. How is this so hard for others in this thread to understand?

Or he will continue to be obnoxious and off-putting to people and be perfectly average.

Look, the mom was rude. I'd say something to her. I'd also take it as maybe a pause moment to evaluate if maybe I need to reign my kid in a bit more.

And while loud chatty kids aren't bad lets not be silly and start the narrative that they're all destined to be super stars.

+1

+2 finally a sensible, balanced comment.

I didn’t get the impression that OP’s kid is “chatty”. I’m sure she would have clarified if that was the case. I was thinking obnoxiously loud, shouting, getting into things, running around when it’s not appropriate, being rough with toys and other kids, etc.

Chatty is something else entirely.

I also think of out of control screaming. I mentioned this thread to a friend who once told me that her brother was so loud that the police came because someone told them a child was being abused. They were just wrestling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:in which a texter badmouthed my kid!
I'm on a few different group threads for my kids' various activities, and I'm sure the sender did NOT know I was in this thread. She wrote, "Unfortunately, [DS's name] will be there, so bring Advil and wine."

My son can get hyper and loud. OK, I'm sure she has no idea I saw this, but it will dawn on her after a fashion - do I chime in or let it stew or what. NOBODY has responded....

I'm almost amused but also like, WTF lady...Nobody's kid is perfect.

In the pandemic, I have zero bandwidth for BS like this. CALL. this. person. out.

OK, but apparently this woman feels the same way about OP's son. Zero bandwidth for loud, hyper kids.

So you avoid them. You don't shit talk a small child to a group of other parents AND be stupid enough to not check to see who you are texting. This daft cow has it coming, even if this kid is the spawn-child, this bitch is just dumb

I don’t think this is a small child like 4 or 5. I think this is 7 or 8 and should know better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s a boy in our neighborhood I find somewhat annoying. He’s extremely extroverted, loud, always goofing off and coming up with silly stories etc...he’s definitely “that” kid. Even then, I would never in 100 million years say anything negative about him to any of the other moms in our social circle. In fact even though he’s a little bit too much personality for me, I recognize the fact that his creativity and fearlessness around people will do him well later in life and he will probably do well in college and have a great career. His mother is lovely and frankly there’s no parenting this big personality out of the kid. It’s just who he is.

I guess my larger point is just because a child gets on your nerves doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with them. It’s a clash of personalities. And you should never be gossiping about children with other parents. It’s mean girls all grown up. How is this so hard for others in this thread to understand?

Or he will continue to be obnoxious and off-putting to people and be perfectly average.

Look, the mom was rude. I'd say something to her. I'd also take it as maybe a pause moment to evaluate if maybe I need to reign my kid in a bit more.

And while loud chatty kids aren't bad lets not be silly and start the narrative that they're all destined to be super stars.

+1

+2 finally a sensible, balanced comment.

I didn’t get the impression that OP’s kid is “chatty”. I’m sure she would have clarified if that was the case. I was thinking obnoxiously loud, shouting, getting into things, running around when it’s not appropriate, being rough with toys and other kids, etc.

Chatty is something else entirely.

I also think of out of control screaming. I mentioned this thread to a friend who once told me that her brother was so loud that the police came because someone told them a child was being abused. They were just wrestling.

Yeah screaming is worse than anything else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread is an anthropological marvel. I'm the OP. I'm not sure what has been more eye-opening -- the offensive text or this 500-plus-post thread.

Did you respond to her non-apology?

[Anonymous]

This is simple. This group of women are not kind! Period. If they are talking about your child, they are talking about you too. Please walk away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My god. This thread has gotten so off the rails.

It’s also obvious how some people on here are self projecting their own experiences who have “that child” and overreacting and telling OP to do crazy things....

Yes, lots of snowflake moms who relate to OP. Parents who don't take responsibility for their children's behavior are the worst. They'll need to stock up on participation trophies.

NP. I disagree. I have teenagers now and have been able to see the otherside of these "loud and wild boys". The loudest and most energetic boy was the star athlete at our high school. He received a huge athletic scholarship and is doing well in his first year of college. Still there were a few moms who would talk crap about him at every football game, wrestling tournament, and lacrosse game. Yes he was loud and energetic, but his parents helped him focus that into healthy outlets. Their annoyance quickly turned to jealousy. The only ones who didn't grow up were the moms.

I'm the mom of teens who posted earlier and I have seen this too. That kid I talked about who was objectively difficult, not just loud, but jumping on the furniture, drawing on walls, literally bouncing off walls etc.? That kid is going to be a successful entrepreneur. He is already founding companies and he's just a teenager. He's starting to soar, and I am so glad that we were kind to him rather than being nasty gossips. I would rather contribute to making the world better than tearing down children, personally.

I guarantee you that when this "successful entrepreneur" is going to the bank to ask for money, he knows to use his inside voice and say please and thank you and shut up when it's time to shut up. I guarantee you that your D1 athletes who were "loud", know to shut up in front of the coach and use their inside voice with a professor - particularly if they want something. Don't tell me they can't help themselves. They can and they do when they want to, or realize the other person is in the position of authority vs. them. For whatever reason, if they are not doing it with you, they don't perceive you as authority, or don't think that there's anything you can do to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I’ll be honest I have never been so invested in a DCUM thread. Team OP.

Same!! I find myself coming back to check for updates and more people yelling at each other.

I’m really sad. I skipped a day, and missed pages 7-35. There’s no catching up at this point. Anybody want to write a tl/dr?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My god. This thread has gotten so off the rails.

It’s also obvious how some people on here are self projecting their own experiences who have “that child” and overreacting and telling OP to do crazy things....

Yes, lots of snowflake moms who relate to OP. Parents who don't take responsibility for their children's behavior are the worst. They'll need to stock up on participation trophies.

NP. I disagree. I have teenagers now and have been able to see the otherside of these "loud and wild boys". The loudest and most energetic boy was the star athlete at our high school. He received a huge athletic scholarship and is doing well in his first year of college. Still there were a few moms who would talk crap about him at every football game, wrestling tournament, and lacrosse game. Yes he was loud and energetic, but his parents helped him focus that into healthy outlets. Their annoyance quickly turned to jealousy. The only ones who didn't grow up were the moms.

I'm the mom of teens who posted earlier and I have seen this too. That kid I talked about who was objectively difficult, not just loud, but jumping on the furniture, drawing on walls, literally bouncing off walls etc.? That kid is going to be a successful entrepreneur. He is already founding companies and he's just a teenager. He's starting to soar, and I am so glad that we were kind to him rather than being nasty gossips. I would rather contribute to making the world better than tearing down children, personally.

I guarantee you that when this "successful entrepreneur" is going to the bank to ask for money, he knows to use his inside voice and say please and thank you and shut up when it's time to shut up. I guarantee you that your D1 athletes who were "loud", know to shut up in front of the coach and use their inside voice with a professor - particularly if they want something. Don't tell me they can't help themselves. They can and they do when they want to, or realize the other person is in the position of authority vs. them. For whatever reason, if they are not doing it with you, they don't perceive you as authority, or don't think that there's anything you can do to them.

Well, OP's kid is probably like 8, so.....what is your point? Do you have one?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I’ll be honest I have never been so invested in a DCUM thread. Team OP.

Same!! I find myself coming back to check for updates and more people yelling at each other.

I’m really sad. I skipped a day, and missed pages 7-35. There’s no catching up at this point. Anybody want to write a tl/dr?

The mean mom replied. Said nothing personal he was just really loud last time. Nothing else worth noting has been said.

[Anonymous]

“Bring me some to go please!”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My god. This thread has gotten so off the rails.

It’s also obvious how some people on here are self projecting their own experiences who have “that child” and overreacting and telling OP to do crazy things....

Yes, lots of snowflake moms who relate to OP. Parents who don't take responsibility for their children's behavior are the worst. They'll need to stock up on participation trophies.

NP. I disagree. I have teenagers now and have been able to see the otherside of these "loud and wild boys". The loudest and most energetic boy was the star athlete at our high school. He received a huge athletic scholarship and is doing well in his first year of college. Still there were a few moms who would talk crap about him at every football game, wrestling tournament, and lacrosse game. Yes he was loud and energetic, but his parents helped him focus that into healthy outlets. Their annoyance quickly turned to jealousy. The only ones who didn't grow up were the moms.

I'm the mom of teens who posted earlier and I have seen this too. That kid I talked about who was objectively difficult, not just loud, but jumping on the furniture, drawing on walls, literally bouncing off walls etc.? That kid is going to be a successful entrepreneur. He is already founding companies and he's just a teenager. He's starting to soar, and I am so glad that we were kind to him rather than being nasty gossips. I would rather contribute to making the world better than tearing down children, personally.

I guarantee you that when this "successful entrepreneur" is going to the bank to ask for money, he knows to use his inside voice and say please and thank you and shut up when it's time to shut up. I guarantee you that your D1 athletes who were "loud", know to shut up in front of the coach and use their inside voice with a professor - particularly if they want something. Don't tell me they can't help themselves. They can and they do when they want to, or realize the other person is in the position of authority vs. them. For whatever reason, if they are not doing it with you, they don't perceive you as authority, or don't think that there's anything you can do to them.

Well, OP's kid is probably like 8, so.....what is your point? Do you have one?

The thread has long drifted past OP and her son. My point is that the loud kids that you think are brilliant or have gone on to brilliant things absolutely do know how to turn it down - when the circumstances are right. Don't tell me they can't help it. They can.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Something similar happened to me years ago. At a party, I overheard parents talking about my kid is too hyper and out of control.

To be honest, I always felt their kids were boring, incurious, and unimaginative, but each person is unique. I chalked it up to them not being used to having a spirited, curious child.

But after hearing that comment, I would start making low-key references to my children's superior imaginative play and curiosity to the other Dads at the party (I'm a dude)

Things like "DS is so into dinosaurs. He spent hours digging for dinosaur bones yesterday in the yard yesterday. You guys are lucky your kids don't want to get dirty"

Oh, good grief.

I posted that. I literally said in my post "each person is unique".

I never judged their kids for preferring to color over wrestling, or preferring to read a book the explore the woods. Like i said, each kid is unique. But if you bash my kid for preferring to play barefoot (always taking his shoes off in the grass), then trust me, your kid preferring to sit on mom's lap is definitely fair game

You thought their kids were boring, incurious and unimaginative. That’s pretty judge-y!

Thats not judgement. Judgement would be saying they were bad or inferior because they were boring.

Calling a boring person boring is just describing them. Saying they are "less than" because of it is judgement. I specifically went out of my way to shrug it off as "each person is unique". There's nothing wrong with boring people. But they are still boring. So not judging, just describing.

DP.

There is something wrong with your kind of "spirited" people who think they are entitled to creating noise and chaos for everyone. If you are usually the center of attention because you are too loud/obnoxious, you are not spirited; you are rude and badly behaved.

OP's child is only a child so he has some growing to do. You, on the other hand ...

+100 If the other kids seem boring to the PP, it’s probably because they’ve shut down in the presence of his attention-craving kid.

Lol. Sounds like I struck a nerve with all the parents of boring kids.

FWIW, this was 8 years ago and my DS is now 11. And with his creative spirit, he's been featured many places, in print and television, for his comedy, and ventriloquism.

the other kids are still sitting on the couch, but instead of looking at Dr. Suess books, they're playing Among Us.

I'll stand by my assessment.

And once again, I never even judged those kids! I just correctly acknowledged their lack of creativity.

My introvert won a coding prize from Apple and has trophies from many robotics competitions. She doesn’t have to bray like a donkey to get noticed.

NP. But apparently you do.

You are just as much an a-hole as the ventriloquist Dad.

[Anonymous]

My take is that the rude text lady is an alcoholic. Kids give her a headache when she's attending Larlo's game with a hangover. She has no filter. She takes no responsibility for her bad behavior.

Forget her, OP. She's a loser.