Why don't people leave their spouse instead of having affairs?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe asking this question on DCUM is just opening Pandora' Box, but are there really that many wives out there who just have no interest in sex anymore after a certain period of time? I've had two long-term relationships in my life, a girlfriend (10 years) and then my wife (6 years), and neither of them ever went more than a week at most without initiating sex (outside of circumstances like illness).

I had a friend whose wife stopped being interested in sex, claiming childcare, household chores, stress, and being married for 10+ years killed her sex drive. Turns out that just meant her sex drive with him. She didn't have any trouble having sex with her boss several times a week. Are women who stop having sex with their husbands/boyfriends stopping altogether, or just stopping with their spouse?

Either one is legit. I could easily stop having sex with my spouse and not replace him with somebody else. But if somebody else were to come along .... I could easily make it happen a few times a week!!!

Why could you "easily" stop having sex with your spouse but could also "easily" make it happen a few times a week with someone else? If the sex drive is there, how could you just stop?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe asking this question on DCUM is just opening Pandora' Box, but are there really that many wives out there who just have no interest in sex anymore after a certain period of time? I've had two long-term relationships in my life, a girlfriend (10 years) and then my wife (6 years), and neither of them ever went more than a week at most without initiating sex (outside of circumstances like illness).

I had a friend whose wife stopped being interested in sex, claiming childcare, household chores, stress, and being married for 10+ years killed her sex drive. Turns out that just meant her sex drive with him. She didn't have any trouble having sex with her boss several times a week. Are women who stop having sex with their husbands/boyfriends stopping altogether, or just stopping with their spouse?

Either one is legit. I could easily stop having sex with my spouse and not replace him with somebody else. But if somebody else were to come along .... I could easily make it happen a few times a week!!!

Why could you "easily" stop having sex with your spouse but could also "easily" make it happen a few times a week with someone else? If the sex drive is there, how could you just stop?

You must be a man. Because you clearly don't understand that very few women actually have a "sex drive" at all. Women don't really have a biological need for sex (well maybe once per month during peak fertility). Rather they need some external compelling reason to want sex. Like a new/interesting man who is pursuing her. Or she might want to secure a new relationship. Those are the standard reasons for women wanting sex. You can see how, after a few years together, they have no more reason to want sex (... with their current man).

[Anonymous]

^ Not true. I am still attracted to my husband after 20+ years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^ Not true. I am still attracted to my husband after 20+ years.

Perhaps you are one of the few I mentioned? But let's just see about that. Being "attracted to" your husband is different from wanting sex with him. Well? And how often do YOU initiate? How often do you reject?

Now take a poll amongst your long time married lady friends. You will see that I am right, that you are (by far!) the exception on this matter.

[Anonymous]

Because I like both.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe asking this question on DCUM is just opening Pandora' Box, but are there really that many wives out there who just have no interest in sex anymore after a certain period of time? I've had two long-term relationships in my life, a girlfriend (10 years) and then my wife (6 years), and neither of them ever went more than a week at most without initiating sex (outside of circumstances like illness).

I had a friend whose wife stopped being interested in sex, claiming childcare, household chores, stress, and being married for 10+ years killed her sex drive. Turns out that just meant her sex drive with him. She didn't have any trouble having sex with her boss several times a week. Are women who stop having sex with their husbands/boyfriends stopping altogether, or just stopping with their spouse?

Either one is legit. I could easily stop having sex with my spouse and not replace him with somebody else. But if somebody else were to come along .... I could easily make it happen a few times a week!!!

Why could you "easily" stop having sex with your spouse but could also "easily" make it happen a few times a week with someone else? If the sex drive is there, how could you just stop?

You must be a man. Because you clearly don't understand that very few women actually have a "sex drive" at all. Women don't really have a biological need for sex (well maybe once per month during peak fertility). Rather they need some external compelling reason to want sex. Like a new/interesting man who is pursuing her. Or she might want to secure a new relationship. Those are the standard reasons for women wanting sex. You can see how, after a few years together, they have no more reason to want sex (... with their current man).

Yep, I'm a man last I checked. So let me make sure I have this right: I somehow stumbled upon two of these "rare" women whose sex drive never dropped throughout the combined 15+ years I was with them? I better go pick up a lottery ticket.

[Anonymous]

^exactly. You did some things right.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ Not true. I am still attracted to my husband after 20+ years.

Perhaps you are one of the few I mentioned? But let's just see about that. Being "attracted to" your husband is different from wanting sex with him. Well? And how often do YOU initiate? How often do you reject?

Now take a poll amongst your long time married lady friends. You will see that I am right, that you are (by far!) the exception on this matter.

Men like to chase women. The low drive ones know this and can hold out. The high drive ones have sex because they want to. Men marry the low drive ones thinking it is a prize, only to find themselves in sexless marriages years later. Men still live the fruitless chase.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe asking this question on DCUM is just opening Pandora' Box, but are there really that many wives out there who just have no interest in sex anymore after a certain period of time? I've had two long-term relationships in my life, a girlfriend (10 years) and then my wife (6 years), and neither of them ever went more than a week at most without initiating sex (outside of circumstances like illness).

I had a friend whose wife stopped being interested in sex, claiming childcare, household chores, stress, and being married for 10+ years killed her sex drive. Turns out that just meant her sex drive with him. She didn't have any trouble having sex with her boss several times a week. Are women who stop having sex with their husbands/boyfriends stopping altogether, or just stopping with their spouse?

Either one is legit. I could easily stop having sex with my spouse and not replace him with somebody else. But if somebody else were to come along .... I could easily make it happen a few times a week!!!

Why could you "easily" stop having sex with your spouse but could also "easily" make it happen a few times a week with someone else? If the sex drive is there, how could you just stop?

You must be a man. Because you clearly don't understand that very few women actually have a "sex drive" at all. Women don't really have a biological need for sex (well maybe once per month during peak fertility). Rather they need some external compelling reason to want sex. Like a new/interesting man who is pursuing her. Or she might want to secure a new relationship. Those are the standard reasons for women wanting sex. You can see how, after a few years together, they have no more reason to want sex (... with their current man).

Yep, I'm a man last I checked. So let me make sure I have this right: I somehow stumbled upon two of these "rare" women whose sex drive never dropped throughout the combined 15+ years I was with them? I better go pick up a lottery ticket.

Yes you’ve been spectacularly lucky. There is lots of research supporting my position. I’ll pay for your lottery ticket if we can go halvesies on the jackpot?

[Anonymous]

^love

[Anonymous]

Answer to OP: Cowardice

Answer to 17:20 above: 50+ Woman here. I'm glad I have a man who can now keep up with me and keeps me satisfied beyond my wildest fantasies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe asking this question on DCUM is just opening Pandora' Box, but are there really that many wives out there who just have no interest in sex anymore after a certain period of time? I've had two long-term relationships in my life, a girlfriend (10 years) and then my wife (6 years), and neither of them ever went more than a week at most without initiating sex (outside of circumstances like illness).

I had a friend whose wife stopped being interested in sex, claiming childcare, household chores, stress, and being married for 10+ years killed her sex drive. Turns out that just meant her sex drive with him. She didn't have any trouble having sex with her boss several times a week. Are women who stop having sex with their husbands/boyfriends stopping altogether, or just stopping with their spouse?

Either one is legit. I could easily stop having sex with my spouse and not replace him with somebody else. But if somebody else were to come along .... I could easily make it happen a few times a week!!!

Why could you "easily" stop having sex with your spouse but could also "easily" make it happen a few times a week with someone else? If the sex drive is there, how could you just stop?

You must be a man. Because you clearly don't understand that very few women actually have a "sex drive" at all. Women don't really have a biological need for sex (well maybe once per month during peak fertility). Rather they need some external compelling reason to want sex. Like a new/interesting man who is pursuing her. Or she might want to secure a new relationship. Those are the standard reasons for women wanting sex. You can see how, after a few years together, they have no more reason to want sex (... with their current man).

Yep, I'm a man last I checked. So let me make sure I have this right: I somehow stumbled upon two of these "rare" women whose sex drive never dropped throughout the combined 15+ years I was with them? I better go pick up a lottery ticket.

Yes you’ve been spectacularly lucky. There is lots of research supporting my position. I’ll pay for your lottery ticket if we can go halvesies on the jackpot?

You want me to give you half of the money I earned without you really doing anything for it? Oh, the irony.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe asking this question on DCUM is just opening Pandora' Box, but are there really that many wives out there who just have no interest in sex anymore after a certain period of time? I've had two long-term relationships in my life, a girlfriend (10 years) and then my wife (6 years), and neither of them ever went more than a week at most without initiating sex (outside of circumstances like illness).

I had a friend whose wife stopped being interested in sex, claiming childcare, household chores, stress, and being married for 10+ years killed her sex drive. Turns out that just meant her sex drive with him. She didn't have any trouble having sex with her boss several times a week. Are women who stop having sex with their husbands/boyfriends stopping altogether, or just stopping with their spouse?

Either one is legit. I could easily stop having sex with my spouse and not replace him with somebody else. But if somebody else were to come along .... I could easily make it happen a few times a week!!!

Why could you "easily" stop having sex with your spouse but could also "easily" make it happen a few times a week with someone else? If the sex drive is there, how could you just stop?

You must be a man. Because you clearly don't understand that very few women actually have a "sex drive" at all. Women don't really have a biological need for sex (well maybe once per month during peak fertility). Rather they need some external compelling reason to want sex. Like a new/interesting man who is pursuing her. Or she might want to secure a new relationship. Those are the standard reasons for women wanting sex. You can see how, after a few years together, they have no more reason to want sex (... with their current man).

No I’m a woman and that’s completely untrue. I have a biological need for sex. I would like it several times a week if it is good but only if it is good. I honestly have never understood people that say women do not need sex like men because they do.

[Anonymous]

My goodness, talk to your doctor, women.

I am a woman and I love sex!! I can’t live without it. It makes my days brighter. I liked sex when I was 19, 29, 39 and I still like it now, at 49. It only gets better, trust me.

If you don’t like sex, you may have a hormonal problem. Or you may need a better partner!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ Not true. I am still attracted to my husband after 20+ years.

Perhaps you are one of the few I mentioned? But let's just see about that. Being "attracted to" your husband is different from wanting sex with him. Well? And how often do YOU initiate? How often do you reject?

Now take a poll amongst your long time married lady friends. You will see that I am right, that you are (by far!) the exception on this matter.

You are so wrong. Maybe you have psychological issues blocking your sex drive. Really. I had been there. In my case, it was a health issue that I didn’t know about. Luckily, my doctor discovered the problem and my sex drive is stronger than ever. Life is great again.