19 year gap - Will everything be okay?

[Anonymous]

My father recently passed away at the age of 90. He was 20 years older than my mother when they married, and she was 25 at the time. My father was the CEO of a Fortune 1000 company and encouraged my mother to leave her job after they married so she could pursue her passion for art and music. He also used his influence to help my mother’s brothers and sisters secure high-paying jobs, creating generational wealth for their families. Because of this, my mother was deeply grateful to my father and treated him as the greatest blessing in her life. My father often said that marrying my mother was like winning the lottery. Although he faced medical issues during the last five years of his life and my mother cared for him tirelessly, she said at his funeral that they shared 45 wonderful years together—and that she would choose that life with him again without hesitation.

Age is just a number. In the end, everything will be fine

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My father recently passed away at the age of 90. He was 20 years older than my mother when they married, and she was 25 at the time. My father was the CEO of a Fortune 1000 company and encouraged my mother to leave her job after they married so she could pursue her passion for art and music. He also used his influence to help my mother’s brothers and sisters secure high-paying jobs, creating generational wealth for their families. Because of this, my mother was deeply grateful to my father and treated him as the greatest blessing in her life. My father often said that marrying my mother was like winning the lottery. Although he faced medical issues during the last five years of his life and my mother cared for him tirelessly, she said at his funeral that they shared 45 wonderful years together—and that she would choose that life with him again without hesitation.

Age is just a number. In the end, everything will be fine

Sounds like OP's man is nowhere near this wealthy.

What do your father's first batch of children think about all this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My father recently passed away at the age of 90. He was 20 years older than my mother when they married, and she was 25 at the time. My father was the CEO of a Fortune 1000 company and encouraged my mother to leave her job after they married so she could pursue her passion for art and music. He also used his influence to help my mother’s brothers and sisters secure high-paying jobs, creating generational wealth for their families. Because of this, my mother was deeply grateful to my father and treated him as the greatest blessing in her life. My father often said that marrying my mother was like winning the lottery. Although he faced medical issues during the last five years of his life and my mother cared for him tirelessly, she said at his funeral that they shared 45 wonderful years together—and that she would choose that life with him again without hesitation.

Age is just a number. In the end, everything will be fine

Sounds like OP's man is nowhere near this wealthy.

What do your father's first batch of children think about all this?

Exactly. I'm sure their version of this man's life would be a lot less rosy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think the problem is the physical age. I know lots of people in their 70s in great shape.

The problem is he’s a complete creeper, emotionally stunted weirdo that he would be focused on dating so much younger. Alternatively, he doesn’t see you as a partner at all; just a F buddy who looks pretty on his arm and lets him talk and takes care of him. Because there is no world where a man at his age would have a natural and equal and healthy partnership with someone ops age. Either he’s mentally screwed up, or it’s not an equal partnership.

NP. This is just like my separated xH, who at almost 60 chases 22 year-olds (plural, I recently found out). I have posted on here before, so the veteran ladies of this forum will recognize me. My teenage D calls him a "predator."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My father recently passed away at the age of 90. He was 20 years older than my mother when they married, and she was 25 at the time. My father was the CEO of a Fortune 1000 company and encouraged my mother to leave her job after they married so she could pursue her passion for art and music. He also used his influence to help my mother’s brothers and sisters secure high-paying jobs, creating generational wealth for their families. Because of this, my mother was deeply grateful to my father and treated him as the greatest blessing in her life. My father often said that marrying my mother was like winning the lottery. Although he faced medical issues during the last five years of his life and my mother cared for him tirelessly, she said at his funeral that they shared 45 wonderful years together—and that she would choose that life with him again without hesitation.

Age is just a number. In the end, everything will be fine

I don't think this story is as charming as you think it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My father recently passed away at the age of 90. He was 20 years older than my mother when they married, and she was 25 at the time. My father was the CEO of a Fortune 1000 company and encouraged my mother to leave her job after they married so she could pursue her passion for art and music. He also used his influence to help my mother’s brothers and sisters secure high-paying jobs, creating generational wealth for their families. Because of this, my mother was deeply grateful to my father and treated him as the greatest blessing in her life. My father often said that marrying my mother was like winning the lottery. Although he faced medical issues during the last five years of his life and my mother cared for him tirelessly, she said at his funeral that they shared 45 wonderful years together—and that she would choose that life with him again without hesitation.

Age is just a number. In the end, everything will be fine

Sounds like OP's man is nowhere near this wealthy.

What do your father's first batch of children think about all this?

What prompted you to say that? My brother, sister, and I are his only children. My mother was his first and only wife.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My father recently passed away at the age of 90. He was 20 years older than my mother when they married, and she was 25 at the time. My father was the CEO of a Fortune 1000 company and encouraged my mother to leave her job after they married so she could pursue her passion for art and music. He also used his influence to help my mother’s brothers and sisters secure high-paying jobs, creating generational wealth for their families. Because of this, my mother was deeply grateful to my father and treated him as the greatest blessing in her life. My father often said that marrying my mother was like winning the lottery. Although he faced medical issues during the last five years of his life and my mother cared for him tirelessly, she said at his funeral that they shared 45 wonderful years together—and that she would choose that life with him again without hesitation.

Age is just a number. In the end, everything will be fine

I don't think this story is as charming as you think it is.

typical ignorance on DCUM.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My father recently passed away at the age of 90. He was 20 years older than my mother when they married, and she was 25 at the time. My father was the CEO of a Fortune 1000 company and encouraged my mother to leave her job after they married so she could pursue her passion for art and music. He also used his influence to help my mother’s brothers and sisters secure high-paying jobs, creating generational wealth for their families. Because of this, my mother was deeply grateful to my father and treated him as the greatest blessing in her life. My father often said that marrying my mother was like winning the lottery. Although he faced medical issues during the last five years of his life and my mother cared for him tirelessly, she said at his funeral that they shared 45 wonderful years together—and that she would choose that life with him again without hesitation.

Age is just a number. In the end, everything will be fine

Sounds like OP's man is nowhere near this wealthy.

What do your father's first batch of children think about all this?

What prompted you to say that? My brother, sister, and I are his only children. My mother was his first and only wife.

Then it’s a different situation from OP .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sounds fake. 10 years is ok, not 19.

How does this sound fake? Tje responses to this are really surprising. It’s always been very common for wealthy men to date women much younger than themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds fake. 10 years is ok, not 19.

How does this sound fake? Tje responses to this are really surprising. It’s always been very common for wealthy men to date women much younger than themselves.

Not really - stop normalizing what’s not typical. Even historically wealthy men remarried to women about same age as themselves. Only a smaller percentage dates younger even if wealthy. I’m late 40s and most men I dated were “one percenters”. Look at Bezos - his new spouse is 7 years younger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds fake. 10 years is ok, not 19.

How does this sound fake? Tje responses to this are really surprising. It’s always been very common for wealthy men to date women much younger than themselves.

Not really - stop normalizing what’s not typical. Even historically wealthy men remarried to women about same age as themselves. Only a smaller percentage dates younger even if wealthy. I’m late 40s and most men I dated were “one percenters”. Look at Bezos - his new spouse is 7 years younger.

You need to get out more often. Jason Statham is 58, and he is engaged/married to his wife who is 38. Harrison Ford is 83, and his wife Calista Flockhart is 61. 69 years old Las Vegas Raiders owner Mark Davis with a 26 years old girlfriend. Based on my small sample size, I would say yes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My father recently passed away at the age of 90. He was 20 years older than my mother when they married, and she was 25 at the time. My father was the CEO of a Fortune 1000 company and encouraged my mother to leave her job after they married so she could pursue her passion for art and music. He also used his influence to help my mother’s brothers and sisters secure high-paying jobs, creating generational wealth for their families. Because of this, my mother was deeply grateful to my father and treated him as the greatest blessing in her life. My father often said that marrying my mother was like winning the lottery. Although he faced medical issues during the last five years of his life and my mother cared for him tirelessly, she said at his funeral that they shared 45 wonderful years together—and that she would choose that life with him again without hesitation.

Age is just a number. In the end, everything will be fine

Sounds like OP's man is nowhere near this wealthy.

What do your father's first batch of children think about all this?

What prompted you to say that? My brother, sister, and I are his only children. My mother was his first and only wife.

That is a completely different situation. OPs entire life is going to be impacted by his first set of kids and his ex wife. His attention, wealth etc has to be divided from the start, and she and any kids she has will be second in priority.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds fake. 10 years is ok, not 19.

How does this sound fake? Tje responses to this are really surprising. It’s always been very common for wealthy men to date women much younger than themselves.

Not really - stop normalizing what’s not typical. Even historically wealthy men remarried to women about same age as themselves. Only a smaller percentage dates younger even if wealthy. I’m late 40s and most men I dated were “one percenters”. Look at Bezos - his new spouse is 7 years younger.

You need to get out more often. Jason Statham is 58, and he is engaged/married to his wife who is 38. Harrison Ford is 83, and his wife Calista Flockhart is 61. 69 years old Las Vegas Raiders owner Mark Davis with a 26 years old girlfriend. Based on my small sample size, I would say yes.

Daniel Craig and Rachel Weisz are 4 years apart; and I can go on. Your selection is not statistical average even for the wealthy . Average age gap for 2bd marriage is not 20 years

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds fake. 10 years is ok, not 19.

How does this sound fake? Tje responses to this are really surprising. It’s always been very common for wealthy men to date women much younger than themselves.

Not really - stop normalizing what’s not typical. Even historically wealthy men remarried to women about same age as themselves. Only a smaller percentage dates younger even if wealthy. I’m late 40s and most men I dated were “one percenters”. Look at Bezos - his new spouse is 7 years younger.

You need to get out more often. Jason Statham is 58, and he is engaged/married to his wife who is 38. Harrison Ford is 83, and his wife Calista Flockhart is 61. 69 years old Las Vegas Raiders owner Mark Davis with a 26 years old girlfriend. Based on my small sample size, I would say yes.

Daniel Craig and Rachel Weisz are 4 years apart; and I can go on. Your selection is not statistical average even for the wealthy . Average age gap for 2bd marriage is not 20 years

Here’s the official statistics: average age gap at second marriage in the US is 5 years
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/12158964/#:~:text=The%20mean%20age%20of%201st,a%20woman%205.3%20years%20younger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My father recently passed away at the age of 90. He was 20 years older than my mother when they married, and she was 25 at the time. My father was the CEO of a Fortune 1000 company and encouraged my mother to leave her job after they married so she could pursue her passion for art and music. He also used his influence to help my mother’s brothers and sisters secure high-paying jobs, creating generational wealth for their families. Because of this, my mother was deeply grateful to my father and treated him as the greatest blessing in her life. My father often said that marrying my mother was like winning the lottery. Although he faced medical issues during the last five years of his life and my mother cared for him tirelessly, she said at his funeral that they shared 45 wonderful years together—and that she would choose that life with him again without hesitation.

Age is just a number. In the end, everything will be fine

Sounds like OP's man is nowhere near this wealthy.

What do your father's first batch of children think about all this?

What prompted you to say that? My brother, sister, and I are his only children. My mother was his first and only wife.

Because you can't say "everything will be fine" without being specific about for whom it is fine.

Your situation seems very different and much easier since there were no older half siblings.