Millennials feel 'abandoned' by parents not available to help raise grandkids: 'Too busy'

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I do get a bit annoyed at my boomer parents, who are always on vacation, while I have small children at home, a demanding career, and cannot get enough sleep.

That’s really bizarre. You made choices to have children and keep a demanding job. And you’re annoyed at retired parents who spent 30 or 40 years working jobs, taking care of children and are now taking vacations?

+1. The sense of entitlement is beyond me.

From our perspective, it is the grandparents who are entitled and making demands of us.

What demands are they making of you?

.

To have grandkids, to see the grandkids on holidays, to host them at our house, to FaceTime with them, to send them pictures and give them updates. But they can’t lift a finger. We just don’t have the time for that anymore. It just creates more work for us.

You should never had kids. You are unfit for the job.

Not at all. We just see the priorities of our grandparents clearly.

They have done their job to raise kids (i.e., you and your siblings). Now, STFU and do YOUR job and raise your own damn kids! You sound terribly entitled.

You sound like a caricature of a lazy boomer.

No, she sounds correct. You sound like the caricature of a lazy, spoiled, entitled Millennial.

-Gen C

Well, Gen X who apparently can’t type.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I do get a bit annoyed at my boomer parents, who are always on vacation, while I have small children at home, a demanding career, and cannot get enough sleep.

So you're annoyed that your parents raised their kids and are enjoying their lives??

They are free to not make us a priority and it will be reciprocated.

You are a spoiled brat. Every time you post, I’m more embarrassed for you.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I do get a bit annoyed at my boomer parents, who are always on vacation, while I have small children at home, a demanding career, and cannot get enough sleep.

So you're annoyed that your parents raised their kids and are enjoying their lives??

They are free to not make us a priority and it will be reciprocated.

Why are you telling people here? Tell your own parents.

She’s “telling people here” for attention.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I feel like a lot of millennials refuse to do the math. When I was small, my grandma was in her 50s. People complaining about lack of help when “my parents’ parents helped them”: how old are your parents? My guess is, substantially older than their parents were when you were born.

It’s nobody’s fault. It’s just a societal change. Complaining won’t help.

Agree with this

Seriously. These millennials have parents who are in the 60’s and 70’s. Millenials need to help take care of their elderly parents, not ask their parents to take care of their small children! Wtf

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I do get a bit annoyed at my boomer parents, who are always on vacation, while I have small children at home, a demanding career, and cannot get enough sleep.

So you're annoyed that your parents raised their kids and are enjoying their lives??

They are free to not make us a priority and it will be reciprocated.

You are clearly unable to make anyone but yourself a priority, reciprocated or not. You parents are smart to no waste their time and energy on you.

You sound lovely.

They are correct. Sorry the truth hurts. Shrug.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I do get a bit annoyed at my boomer parents, who are always on vacation, while I have small children at home, a demanding career, and cannot get enough sleep.

So you're annoyed that your parents raised their kids and are enjoying their lives??

They are free to not make us a priority and it will be reciprocated.

You are a spoiled brat. Every time you post, I’m more embarrassed for you.

So you think parents should never call their kids and not even try to have a relationship with their grandkids and then expect full on care when it’s time. No thanks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And barely Gen Exer Growing up in the 70’s and 80’s, I don’t remember very many kids with grandparents helping out. I remember latch key kids instead. It certainly wasn’t the norm in either of my parent’s extended families.

Yup. I’m 49 and this was how we were raised as gen xers. We did a lot of things on our own and grandparents certainly didn’t help out much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So amusing how this thread went from criticizing boomers for not helping to criticizing them for not doing it right. You just can’t win with you people.

Just keep booking your vacations then and enjoy your life of leisure.

They will. Cry more about it, you massive toddler.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Why do grandparents owe their children and grandchildren anything? Yes, it would be great if they could help out but some of your are downright entitled. You think your parents still owe you their time and effort? How messed up is that?

Why do we owe you Social security or medicare?

The average boomer never paid enough into those systems, which is why they're going broke.

That’s not how it works.

For decades Boomers vehementy opposed paying more taxes to shore up SS or medicare. Instead they always pushed for expanding yet abother benefit for themselves. So they're getting way more out of those systems than they ever paid in. Now Millennials are left holding the bag with all this national debt while Boomers basically have the gov pay for their viagra and pleasure cruises.

Precisely. Most selfish generation in history.

Still not how it works. SS has never been a get what you pay in. It’s always been you get what the current working generations pay in.

So why don't younger generations simply stop paying for SS and Medicare then? I'd like to keep more of my hard-earned money for my own retirement instead of being forced to subsidize gilded pleasure cruises for greedy and ungrateful boomers.

I mean, Boomers selfishly never paid enough into the system, so why should anyone else feel bad about wanting to keep more of their own money now?

Keep tantruming. It’s SO attractive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And barely Gen Exer Growing up in the 70’s and 80’s, I don’t remember very many kids with grandparents helping out. I remember latch key kids instead. It certainly wasn’t the norm in either of my parent’s extended families.

Yup. I’m 49 and this was how we were raised as gen xers. We did a lot of things on our own and grandparents certainly didn’t help out much.

We went home to empty houses. Nobody was waiting for us, or driving all over hell's half acre to take us to various activities. Go home, get a snack, watch TV. Or start supper, depending on the household.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:As a boomer I never expected child care or financial support from my parents and my parents never received that from their parents. Why do millennials expect it from their parents? We all faced child care and financial challenges when we were in our 30s and 40s but somehow survived over time. I still cringe when I think about our 17.25% mortgage in 1981. I never had one below 6-7% which is now considered outrageous.

Cost of living and home prices back then were in a completely different league than today.

+1

In 1965, one could buy a house in the Northeast for about $30k. A new car was about $3k. What do you think those comparables cost now?

Does that make you entitled to your parent's help?

Boomers didn't buy new all the time. A hole in your pants, or sock? Get out the needle and thread. Take care of things so they last. That $3k car - how long did they have it? They had one car, too.

DP. My Boomer parents have never, in my lifetime, had fewer than three cars for the two of them.

I love how you thought this dramatic proclamation meant anything at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a boomer I never expected child care or financial support from my parents and my parents never received that from their parents. Why do millennials expect it from their parents? We all faced child care and financial challenges when we were in our 30s and 40s but somehow survived over time. I still cringe when I think about our 17.25% mortgage in 1981. I never had one below 6-7% which is now considered outrageous.

Right but what was the value of your mortgage? Guessing it wasnt 1.5 million. 17% of 100000 is less than 4% of 1 million. Full picture here, which I know is not boomers strong suite.

Sweetie pie, you know what it was called when you took out a 1.5m mortgage?

Your CHOICE.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I do get a bit annoyed at my boomer parents, who are always on vacation, while I have small children at home, a demanding career, and cannot get enough sleep.

You had them. Why is it up to your parents to take the pressure off?

Their own parents helped them out quite a lot. However, they will not return the favor as grandparents themself. They are pretty much checked out.

Returning the favor would be your parents caring for their elderly parents. You haven’t done anything for them to repay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a boomer I never expected child care or financial support from my parents and my parents never received that from their parents. Why do millennials expect it from their parents? We all faced child care and financial challenges when we were in our 30s and 40s but somehow survived over time. I still cringe when I think about our 17.25% mortgage in 1981. I never had one below 6-7% which is now considered outrageous.

Cost of living and home prices back then were in a completely different league than today.

Yes, and incomes were much lower. No boomer ever had a 3% mortgage and with debt that cheap size of homes and prices escalate which is very understandable. Cost of living? Boomers never, in their 30s and 40s, paid for cell phones, streaming services, Instacart, Uber Eats etc. They didn’t exist! Our cost of living may have been lower because we didn’t have all of these things to piss our money away on. We actually cooked our own meals and watched free TV.

So y’all weren’t smarter or more self-disciplined. You just had fewer options.

[Anonymous]

Gen X here and the only time my grandparents came to visit us was the one time my parents took an extended vacation together. Otherwise, we always went to them.

My parents and my in-laws both live in different states~ 5+ hours away. They come to visit a few times a year. They are always helpful when they come and will pitch in with kids and household chores. They obviously can’t help regularly, but we welcome their interaction with grandkids.