2023: where will you move when your kids leave home?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm ambivalent. I have not found an amazing community of people in my DC suburb but I do have a few people I like and could potentially make more friends with some effort. The DMV feels comfortably familiar even with its limitations (no beach, ugly suburbs, insects and humidity, high COL.) When I visit other places I think I'd like to live, I never get a "home" feeling but maybe that is because I am only there for vacation. Other places are prettier, better weather, etc. but they also lack something that only DC and maybe a few other major cities have. The diversity is another draw. For me, living in an all-white area for me would get old fast. I like a slower pace of life in theory but when it comes down to it, I think the need to be among well-educated, liberal people. And yet, I don't want to live my entire adult life in one place. A second home somewhere else seems ideal or summers spent elsewhere.

Most people move to be near similar people in retirement.

For example I want to retire at 70. Is it crazy to want to live near other retirees with similar race, religion and age who like to do similar things? You need to make friends very quick. Hard to do unless you got something in common

It’s crazy to me that you think people have to be of the same race or religion to have something in common and to like to do similar things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're moving to Belize in October. Can't wait. The kids can't wait to visit and we will be back a few times a year for a few weeks each time.

Oooh! Sounds amazing! Tell us more!

We're moving to an island off the coast so not on the mainland. The mainland is cheaper but we fell in love with the island (Ambergris Caye). We're buying a small house on the lagoon side on a canal with a small swimming pool and a nice fenced in lot for under $300K. There are no private cars so you have a golf cart or bike or walk (or boat). There's about 20,000 people on the island altogether at peak season. It's around 82 degrees and usually sunny every day. English is the official language. There's no one day delivery, no chain stores or restaurants, no mass shootings, no commuting. It's a simpler, slower way of life. I've been working online/phone throughout the pandemic so I'll continue to do that. We're also starting a small, simple business that we can at least afford to run/break even on and will probably significantly contribute to our expenses.

Including my portion of my kids' college tuition, health insurance in the US just in case of a catastrophic illness (routine care down there is super cheap), and a reasonable day-to-day existence including travel to/from the US, tickets for the kids, and meals out usually at local, sometimes at tourist restaurants, we can live on under $4,000/month. Easily. Most Belizeans on the island live on under $1,000/month so that would be a very comfortable existence.

We're tired of the violence in the US, the political situation, the orange man possibly coming back, the traffic, the commute, the commercialism, the expense. Belize is absolutely not perfect, but people are happy, it's beautiful, we can work to live and have more time for outdoor activities, we will have a lighter footprint on the earth, and it's really not that much harder to get to than if my kids went to college anywhere from the Midwest to California. Around 8 hours from BWI to the island if you work it right.

Are you as all concerned about healthcare? I loved Belize but that would be my major concern about moving there

I’ve posted on this previously. I have a lot of experience in that part of the Americas, including investing in property and spending lots and lots of time there and interacting frequently with expats.

The bottom line: OP is romanticizing living there full time and will discover soon enough that it gets old real fast. Yes, health care is a serious issue, especially for an older adult. But beyond that, island fever is real. OP is joining a very small expat community. She will see the same people, attend the same small number of establishments, and engage in the same limited variety of activities constantly. Many of the expats are, for want of a better word, “different” - often not in a good way. Many will have very little money. Many will take advantage of, exploit or at a minimum be entirely indifferent to and make no effort to mix with the locals.

And here’s the real kicker: a majority of expats, particularly the newer ones, won’t be aging leftist hippies, which has its charms - they will be older white Americans and Canadians, disproportionately male and divorced - and ignorant right wing Trump supporters with little formal education who embrace conspiracy theories and are anti-vaccine.

I’m not saying they ALL will be that way. They won’t all be. The problem is that it’s such a small community and cutting out such a large portion of it makes it truly suffocating. Such a great place to visit. But no more than a couple months a year and when family can tag along. Otherwise, nope.

I'm absolutely puzzled as to why someone would think that I would move to Belize just to make friends with other expats? So far the friends I have made in my trips there, with whom I have kept in touch and who are eagerly awaiting our return, are mostly Belizeans. We have made a few expat friends as well who seem completely normal, not right wing whackos, and fun and interesting. We also will be running a business and working online in the States so we will be very busy. We are not planning on frequenting touristy/expat hangouts. There are a few that we have gotten to know where we've met many people to hang out with for a night or a few nights on previous visits and that's an additional fun social activity, but won't be our only. We also tend to spend a ton of time together as a couple so we don't need tons and tons of other friends.

It's so easy to make acquaintances among the Belizeans -- they're so friendly and 2-3 trips to the same establishments puts you on a first-name basis with them. Compared to where we live now, a city neighborhood with tons of walking and friendly people, we feel much more neighborly in Belize. There's a strong population of professionals on the island working in a variety of capacities and we anticipate getting to know them. If we also make some expat friends, great, but what a strange way of thinking. I don't want to be rude, but it's good that a person who thinks you move to another country only to be friends with other people from your home country is, in fact, not trying to move to another country! We're living in a Belizean neighborhood and meeting Belizean people. Yes, some of the people we encounter are significantly less well off than we are creating an unbalanced relationship, but that's not an insurmountable problem. I also have a very high tolerance for a variety of kinds of people -- not everyone I hang out on the beach and have a beer with has to line up with my political views.

As for health care, we have no particular problems now. We understand that we might have to start going to Mexico on the water taxi for more complicated care if that arises. My biggest problem right now is arthritis which I plan to help by swimming every day in either our pool at our house or the ocean. My DH's biggest problem is a physically taxing job so once he's not doing that anymore (and we can afford for him to take a step down because of the lower cost of living) his body will not be as abused. He also has a minor syndrome that makes cold weather particularly hard on him so the warmer climate will significantly decrease his pain. Otherwise, life is life. The lower stress, no cars, healthy eating, increased exercise and just general activity, will likely at least balance out the chances of a catastrophic health issue. Yes, in 20 years we might have to reevaluate, but I'll take the risk.

Nowhere is perfect. We've been here all our lives and are ready for a change. We can't afford to live the standard of living that we would like to (on the water, not Florida, warm, car free, able to travel) in the US.

The last line (“we can’t afford to live the standard of living that we would like to in the US”) says it all. That’s why virtually everyone moves south of the border to retire. Not because it’s paradise, but because they can’t afford the paradise they want in the US.

Good luck to you. You’re gonna need it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're moving to Belize in October. Can't wait. The kids can't wait to visit and we will be back a few times a year for a few weeks each time.

Oooh! Sounds amazing! Tell us more!

We're moving to an island off the coast so not on the mainland. The mainland is cheaper but we fell in love with the island (Ambergris Caye). We're buying a small house on the lagoon side on a canal with a small swimming pool and a nice fenced in lot for under $300K. There are no private cars so you have a golf cart or bike or walk (or boat). There's about 20,000 people on the island altogether at peak season. It's around 82 degrees and usually sunny every day. English is the official language. There's no one day delivery, no chain stores or restaurants, no mass shootings, no commuting. It's a simpler, slower way of life. I've been working online/phone throughout the pandemic so I'll continue to do that. We're also starting a small, simple business that we can at least afford to run/break even on and will probably significantly contribute to our expenses.

Including my portion of my kids' college tuition, health insurance in the US just in case of a catastrophic illness (routine care down there is super cheap), and a reasonable day-to-day existence including travel to/from the US, tickets for the kids, and meals out usually at local, sometimes at tourist restaurants, we can live on under $4,000/month. Easily. Most Belizeans on the island live on under $1,000/month so that would be a very comfortable existence.

We're tired of the violence in the US, the political situation, the orange man possibly coming back, the traffic, the commute, the commercialism, the expense. Belize is absolutely not perfect, but people are happy, it's beautiful, we can work to live and have more time for outdoor activities, we will have a lighter footprint on the earth, and it's really not that much harder to get to than if my kids went to college anywhere from the Midwest to California. Around 8 hours from BWI to the island if you work it right.

Are you as all concerned about healthcare? I loved Belize but that would be my major concern about moving there

I’ve posted on this previously. I have a lot of experience in that part of the Americas, including investing in property and spending lots and lots of time there and interacting frequently with expats.

The bottom line: OP is romanticizing living there full time and will discover soon enough that it gets old real fast. Yes, health care is a serious issue, especially for an older adult. But beyond that, island fever is real. OP is joining a very small expat community. She will see the same people, attend the same small number of establishments, and engage in the same limited variety of activities constantly. Many of the expats are, for want of a better word, “different” - often not in a good way. Many will have very little money. Many will take advantage of, exploit or at a minimum be entirely indifferent to and make no effort to mix with the locals.

And here’s the real kicker: a majority of expats, particularly the newer ones, won’t be aging leftist hippies, which has its charms - they will be older white Americans and Canadians, disproportionately male and divorced - and ignorant right wing Trump supporters with little formal education who embrace conspiracy theories and are anti-vaccine.

I’m not saying they ALL will be that way. They won’t all be. The problem is that it’s such a small community and cutting out such a large portion of it makes it truly suffocating. Such a great place to visit. But no more than a couple months a year and when family can tag along. Otherwise, nope.

I'm absolutely puzzled as to why someone would think that I would move to Belize just to make friends with other expats? So far the friends I have made in my trips there, with whom I have kept in touch and who are eagerly awaiting our return, are mostly Belizeans. We have made a few expat friends as well who seem completely normal, not right wing whackos, and fun and interesting. We also will be running a business and working online in the States so we will be very busy. We are not planning on frequenting touristy/expat hangouts. There are a few that we have gotten to know where we've met many people to hang out with for a night or a few nights on previous visits and that's an additional fun social activity, but won't be our only. We also tend to spend a ton of time together as a couple so we don't need tons and tons of other friends.

It's so easy to make acquaintances among the Belizeans -- they're so friendly and 2-3 trips to the same establishments puts you on a first-name basis with them. Compared to where we live now, a city neighborhood with tons of walking and friendly people, we feel much more neighborly in Belize. There's a strong population of professionals on the island working in a variety of capacities and we anticipate getting to know them. If we also make some expat friends, great, but what a strange way of thinking. I don't want to be rude, but it's good that a person who thinks you move to another country only to be friends with other people from your home country is, in fact, not trying to move to another country! We're living in a Belizean neighborhood and meeting Belizean people. Yes, some of the people we encounter are significantly less well off than we are creating an unbalanced relationship, but that's not an insurmountable problem. I also have a very high tolerance for a variety of kinds of people -- not everyone I hang out on the beach and have a beer with has to line up with my political views.

As for health care, we have no particular problems now. We understand that we might have to start going to Mexico on the water taxi for more complicated care if that arises. My biggest problem right now is arthritis which I plan to help by swimming every day in either our pool at our house or the ocean. My DH's biggest problem is a physically taxing job so once he's not doing that anymore (and we can afford for him to take a step down because of the lower cost of living) his body will not be as abused. He also has a minor syndrome that makes cold weather particularly hard on him so the warmer climate will significantly decrease his pain. Otherwise, life is life. The lower stress, no cars, healthy eating, increased exercise and just general activity, will likely at least balance out the chances of a catastrophic health issue. Yes, in 20 years we might have to reevaluate, but I'll take the risk.

Nowhere is perfect. We've been here all our lives and are ready for a change. We can't afford to live the standard of living that we would like to (on the water, not Florida, warm, car free, able to travel) in the US.

I find it remarkable if you can truly move to Belize and not need to rely on an expat community. Belize is either the perfect, most friendly place for outsiders OR you’re delusional and in for a rude awakening. There’s a decent chance the people are friendly but do not have any interest in actually becoming friends with you.

Look, this poster is living in La La land. It’s a pretty common trap for Americans of a certain stripe - a few touristy visits to a place like Belize, where locals are friendly because they think you have money and weird expats only tell you about the sunny side of life there and you’re hooked. I totally get it.

It’s worth noting that she’s not planning to retire there yet, either. She plans on running a business and working on line still. That tells me she doesn’t have a lot of money. That’s another one of the ways that they get you. Thinking you can move there and work and live the good life. “Running a business” in a place like Belize where you have no prior experience is a real eye-opener though. It’s a good thing it’s cheaper to live there because you’re going to earn less in any business you run there and you’re not gonna be working any less hard for it. But you know who will work less hard? Your employees. I don’t mean this as a criticism of the locals either - it’s cultural and that’s fine. Just get ready.

Yea, she’ll go to a local pub a few times, as she said, and before you know it everyone will love her. You know why? They’ll be hoping she buys the next round.

[Anonymous]

PP here. One more thing. The poster says it’s “usually sunny every day.” That’s the kind of misleading statement you’ll find in a travel or investment brochure. Belize has a rainy season from June to November, with a brief respite for half days in August if you’re lucky. Torrential rains at times, no tourists, many businesses close down - and yes it’s in the hurricane zone.

The standard recommendation for anyone contemplating OP’s move is to rent first, then buy. Apparently that ship for OP has already sailed. Congrats to whoever in Belize (my guess is an expat real estate agent) who reeled her in.

[Anonymous]

To the person moving to Belize….be extremely cautious about healthcare in Mexico!!!

[Anonymous]

Belize was most recently hit by a Hurricane in November 2022, less than a year ago. While Belize City was hit the hardest, the despite the player’s insistence that “something about the reef is protective” the Cay District suffered serious damage as well.

According to PAHO:

“Classified as a small island developing state, Belize's low-lying coasts, rising sea level, coastal erosion and topical climate combine to make the country vulnerable to hurricanes, flooding, and storm surges. Almost all national health facilities are in areas at risk.”

[Anonymous]

Sorry I meant “poster” not “player.” Although she IS playing - with fire that is lol

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To the person moving to Belize….be extremely cautious about healthcare in Mexico!!!

I've visited Belize years ago, it was such a sh*thole. Why would anyone want to live there full time beats me. So many nicer places, and weather/nature isn't any better. Beaches were not impressive either, one of them was inundated by sand flies and unusable, and not very pretty TBH despite white sand and blue water. the other was similar to one of the worse FL beaches but without much in terms of amenities. They have some cute resorts, but so many bugs, it's a jungle. Population is mostly poor and lives in dilapidated housing making it a depressing place outside of touristy places. Maybe if you are big into diving and would do this daily it makes sense, even then

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To the person moving to Belize….be extremely cautious about healthcare in Mexico!!!

I've visited Belize years ago, it was such a sh*thole. Why would anyone want to live there full time beats me. So many nicer places, and weather/nature isn't any better. Beaches were not impressive either, one of them was inundated by sand flies and unusable, and not very pretty TBH despite white sand and blue water. the other was similar to one of the worse FL beaches but without much in terms of amenities. They have some cute resorts, but so many bugs, it's a jungle. Population is mostly poor and lives in dilapidated housing making it a depressing place outside of touristy places. Maybe if you are big into diving and would do this daily it makes sense, even then

Now now. I wouldn’t go THAT far. Belize is a nice place! To visit, that is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're moving to Belize in October. Can't wait. The kids can't wait to visit and we will be back a few times a year for a few weeks each time.

Oooh! Sounds amazing! Tell us more!

We're moving to an island off the coast so not on the mainland. The mainland is cheaper but we fell in love with the island (Ambergris Caye). We're buying a small house on the lagoon side on a canal with a small swimming pool and a nice fenced in lot for under $300K. There are no private cars so you have a golf cart or bike or walk (or boat). There's about 20,000 people on the island altogether at peak season. It's around 82 degrees and usually sunny every day. English is the official language. There's no one day delivery, no chain stores or restaurants, no mass shootings, no commuting. It's a simpler, slower way of life. I've been working online/phone throughout the pandemic so I'll continue to do that. We're also starting a small, simple business that we can at least afford to run/break even on and will probably significantly contribute to our expenses.

Including my portion of my kids' college tuition, health insurance in the US just in case of a catastrophic illness (routine care down there is super cheap), and a reasonable day-to-day existence including travel to/from the US, tickets for the kids, and meals out usually at local, sometimes at tourist restaurants, we can live on under $4,000/month. Easily. Most Belizeans on the island live on under $1,000/month so that would be a very comfortable existence.

We're tired of the violence in the US, the political situation, the orange man possibly coming back, the traffic, the commute, the commercialism, the expense. Belize is absolutely not perfect, but people are happy, it's beautiful, we can work to live and have more time for outdoor activities, we will have a lighter footprint on the earth, and it's really not that much harder to get to than if my kids went to college anywhere from the Midwest to California. Around 8 hours from BWI to the island if you work it right.

Are you as all concerned about healthcare? I loved Belize but that would be my major concern about moving there

I’ve posted on this previously. I have a lot of experience in that part of the Americas, including investing in property and spending lots and lots of time there and interacting frequently with expats.

The bottom line: OP is romanticizing living there full time and will discover soon enough that it gets old real fast. Yes, health care is a serious issue, especially for an older adult. But beyond that, island fever is real. OP is joining a very small expat community. She will see the same people, attend the same small number of establishments, and engage in the same limited variety of activities constantly. Many of the expats are, for want of a better word, “different” - often not in a good way. Many will have very little money. Many will take advantage of, exploit or at a minimum be entirely indifferent to and make no effort to mix with the locals.

And here’s the real kicker: a majority of expats, particularly the newer ones, won’t be aging leftist hippies, which has its charms - they will be older white Americans and Canadians, disproportionately male and divorced - and ignorant right wing Trump supporters with little formal education who embrace conspiracy theories and are anti-vaccine.

I’m not saying they ALL will be that way. They won’t all be. The problem is that it’s such a small community and cutting out such a large portion of it makes it truly suffocating.

Such a great place to visit. But no more than a couple months a year and when family can tag along. Otherwise, nope.

Oh, you know my uncle who moved to Panama. He and his third wife divorced while there and then he moved to Florida. So, pretty much a lateral move.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For the relatively few who are leaving, it seems like they’re headed to lower-cost, but uninteresting parts of the country. It’s like all they want is cheap housing and warm weather. In the long-run, that seems pretty boring.

Because the DMV is that interesting? It’s mostly strip malls and cheap looking housing. A lot of traffic and bad weather. Hot summers but no beaches or large bodies of water. Most people are just here for the jobs. You may find this area interesting but many of us do not.

I totally agree

+2

I don't understand the bashing of people who actually have an opinion, and are heard - instead of squishing your thoughts down and not being heard: "oh this place is great!" No. No, it is not. Get out a little more and experience the world.

They aren’t talking about the world, they are talking about Phoenix/Mesa, Dallas/Ft Worth, and The Villages.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're moving to Belize in October. Can't wait. The kids can't wait to visit and we will be back a few times a year for a few weeks each time.

Oooh! Sounds amazing! Tell us more!

We're moving to an island off the coast so not on the mainland. The mainland is cheaper but we fell in love with the island (Ambergris Caye). We're buying a small house on the lagoon side on a canal with a small swimming pool and a nice fenced in lot for under $300K. There are no private cars so you have a golf cart or bike or walk (or boat). There's about 20,000 people on the island altogether at peak season. It's around 82 degrees and usually sunny every day. English is the official language. There's no one day delivery, no chain stores or restaurants, no mass shootings, no commuting. It's a simpler, slower way of life. I've been working online/phone throughout the pandemic so I'll continue to do that. We're also starting a small, simple business that we can at least afford to run/break even on and will probably significantly contribute to our expenses.

Including my portion of my kids' college tuition, health insurance in the US just in case of a catastrophic illness (routine care down there is super cheap), and a reasonable day-to-day existence including travel to/from the US, tickets for the kids, and meals out usually at local, sometimes at tourist restaurants, we can live on under $4,000/month. Easily. Most Belizeans on the island live on under $1,000/month so that would be a very comfortable existence.

We're tired of the violence in the US, the political situation, the orange man possibly coming back, the traffic, the commute, the commercialism, the expense. Belize is absolutely not perfect, but people are happy, it's beautiful, we can work to live and have more time for outdoor activities, we will have a lighter footprint on the earth, and it's really not that much harder to get to than if my kids went to college anywhere from the Midwest to California. Around 8 hours from BWI to the island if you work it right.

Are you as all concerned about healthcare? I loved Belize but that would be my major concern about moving there

I’ve posted on this previously. I have a lot of experience in that part of the Americas, including investing in property and spending lots and lots of time there and interacting frequently with expats.

The bottom line: OP is romanticizing living there full time and will discover soon enough that it gets old real fast. Yes, health care is a serious issue, especially for an older adult. But beyond that, island fever is real. OP is joining a very small expat community. She will see the same people, attend the same small number of establishments, and engage in the same limited variety of activities constantly. Many of the expats are, for want of a better word, “different” - often not in a good way. Many will have very little money. Many will take advantage of, exploit or at a minimum be entirely indifferent to and make no effort to mix with the locals.

And here’s the real kicker: a majority of expats, particularly the newer ones, won’t be aging leftist hippies, which has its charms - they will be older white Americans and Canadians, disproportionately male and divorced - and ignorant right wing Trump supporters with little formal education who embrace conspiracy theories and are anti-vaccine.

I’m not saying they ALL will be that way. They won’t all be. The problem is that it’s such a small community and cutting out such a large portion of it makes it truly suffocating.

Such a great place to visit. But no more than a couple months a year and when family can tag along. Otherwise, nope.

Oh, you know my uncle who moved to Panama. He and his third wife divorced while there and then he moved to Florida. So, pretty much a lateral move.

Well, there you have it. Pretty typical. A bunch of misfits.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband and I have lived in the city (DC) for the past 25+ years in 3 different homes and we are finally done with this city. Not bagging on it, but we are ready to stop taking care of a home and start living our semi-retired lives in a new place. We both have remote jobs and can live anywhere. We hate the frigid cold but also don’t want to burn up in the desert SW. We think out West is best because of the natural beauty, national parks, and lower density of humans. But we don’t want to live super remote. Anyone else either moved already or making plans to go someplace that fits this bill or plans to go? Help us decide!!!

Moving to the Villages in Florida where we can live free and not be judged by neighbors

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: Probably one of the Carolinas or somewhere west like California.

North Carolina is closed, there are already too many Yankees from the DMV here telling everyone “that’s not how we did it in Virginia”, or “oh the food here in North Carolina isn’t anything like the food we had in Maryland” or “why doesn’t South Carolina have diners?”

[Anonymous]

Oregon.