Daughter and grandson just turned down full scholarship to Maryland (UMD)

[Anonymous]

If he's a UMD fan but targeting crappy colleges, he's acting like he thinks he'd be rejected from UMD. Does grandpa have admissions juice too?

[Anonymous]

OP,

Lots of things seem off in your post:

1. First, even if it may be legal, it's unethical to use a board position to give an advantage to a family member. As board members, my colleagues and I are careful to avoid even the appearance of impropriety.

2. You claim to follow your daughter's and grandson's movements on FB, but do you spend time communicating constructively on the important issues? Did you actually sit down and discuss the situation frankly, as in: "we are hoping to get you a full ride scholarship to UMD, do you want to do your part in this, or shall we scrap those plans?" However immoral such an abuse of your husband's position that may have been, it would have been a good idea to be clear on your grandson's participation beforehand. If he said we would do it, then reneged, you now know not to help him anymore. If he was ambivalent, the current situation should not come as a surprise.

[Anonymous]

M
Y
O
B

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like he is not interested in UMD - not really your business why, or how his parents will pay for college, unless they're asking you to contribute. Based on your post it sounds like there is a history of intrusiveness and control. I'd guess your daughter is fed up and doesn't want to deal with your reaction, so she's letting you find out passively.

A facebook post on Saturday said he was rooting for the Maryland football team and wished he could have gone to the game versus Rutgers. How does one get fed up with a scholarship?

PP - I meant she's probably fed up with you intruding and trying to direct her kid to the college of your choice. Which is why she and her son are ignoring your calls and not sharing information. Whether or not it's a good decision, it's not really your business. You have made your opinion known, now it's time to back off.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
OP,

Lots of things seem off in your post:

1. First, even if it may be legal, it's unethical to use a board position to give an advantage to a family member. As board members, my colleagues and I are careful to avoid even the appearance of impropriety.

2. You claim to follow your daughter's and grandson's movements on FB, but do you spend time communicating constructively on the important issues? Did you actually sit down and discuss the situation frankly, as in: "we are hoping to get you a full ride scholarship to UMD, do you want to do your part in this, or shall we scrap those plans?" However immoral such an abuse of your husband's position that may have been, it would have been a good idea to be clear on your grandson's participation beforehand. If he said we would do it, then reneged, you now know not to help him anymore. If he was ambivalent, the current situation should not come as a surprise.

There's nothing unethical. This is a local private scholarship given to qualified children of friends and family year in year out. Some years they don't even get enough qualified kids to apply so it carries over.

Yes, they reneged and now I wonder if we didn't articulate the generosity of the scholarship. It's puzzling, especially when we see him now interested in less competitive colleges which will cost them serious loans to attend, if they even qualify to take out loans.

[Anonymous]

TROLL.

[Anonymous]

I don't see what is the issue here? Kid doesn't want to go to UMD. Maybe he is a tennis player and UMD cut the tennis program. But, it is sad to see that, as usual, corruption and nepotism rules.

[Anonymous]

About 8 people in my family have received scholarships to UMD and all but 3 have turned them down. Why do you care?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
OP,

Lots of things seem off in your post:

1. First, even if it may be legal, it's unethical to use a board position to give an advantage to a family member. As board members, my colleagues and I are careful to avoid even the appearance of impropriety.

2. You claim to follow your daughter's and grandson's movements on FB, but do you spend time communicating constructively on the important issues? Did you actually sit down and discuss the situation frankly, as in: "we are hoping to get you a full ride scholarship to UMD, do you want to do your part in this, or shall we scrap those plans?" However immoral such an abuse of your husband's position that may have been, it would have been a good idea to be clear on your grandson's participation beforehand. If he said we would do it, then reneged, you now know not to help him anymore. If he was ambivalent, the current situation should not come as a surprise.

There's nothing unethical. This is a local private scholarship given to qualified children of friends and family year in year out. Some years they don't even get enough qualified kids to apply so it carries over.

Yes, they reneged and now I wonder if we didn't articulate the generosity of the scholarship. It's puzzling, especially when we see him now interested in less competitive colleges which will cost them serious loans to attend, if they even qualify to take out loans.

Pp you quoted. In that case, pick up the phone, and explain to your grandson how much money this was and how it could have helped him, and the effort your husband went to obtain it for him. And if ever they ask you for money for something else, politely decline. You're done here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am on facebook all afternoon and it updates with friends posts. My grandson and I are friends so I see his posts. I don't stalk the boy.

Good Lord. Get a damn life

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
OP,

Lots of things seem off in your post:

1. First, even if it may be legal, it's unethical to use a board position to give an advantage to a family member. As board members, my colleagues and I are careful to avoid even the appearance of impropriety.

2. You claim to follow your daughter's and grandson's movements on FB, but do you spend time communicating constructively on the important issues? Did you actually sit down and discuss the situation frankly, as in: "we are hoping to get you a full ride scholarship to UMD, do you want to do your part in this, or shall we scrap those plans?" However immoral such an abuse of your husband's position that may have been, it would have been a good idea to be clear on your grandson's participation beforehand. If he said we would do it, then reneged, you now know not to help him anymore. If he was ambivalent, the current situation should not come as a surprise.

There's nothing unethical. This is a local private scholarship given to qualified children of friends and family year in year out. Some years they don't even get enough qualified kids to apply so it carries over.

Yes, they reneged and now I wonder if we didn't articulate the generosity of the scholarship. It's puzzling, especially when we see him now interested in less competitive colleges which will cost them serious loans to attend, if they even qualify to take out loans.

Dear lord. They are obviously avoiding the topic for a reason, and it's not because they didn't understand the terms of the scholarship - it's probably because you were so pushy about it! It's only puzzling because you refuse to take silence as an answer.

[Anonymous]

This post is a fraud. Priority applications were due Nov 1 and decisions don't come out until end of Jan beginnings of Feb.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He did not show.
.
.
.
They make good money but the family has zero savings.

So a family with lengthy history of making dumb decisions made another dumb decision? This shouldn't come as a surprise.

+1

+2

[Anonymous]

In five years they'll be praying you die soon so they can inherit the estate to pay off the kid's 60 grand in loans they co-signed.

[Anonymous]

Sorry OP, you raised a spoiled dumb daughter who married same and passed it down to grandson. Enjoy your life, let them figure out theirs. And for goodness sakes never loan them cash ever again.