Found out my son is not mine

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you been raising him since birth, in the same household? I have a 3 yo, and I can't imagine just up and walking out on her one day. It breaks my heart just thinking about a child having to go through that.

+1000

Yep. And this lousy mother can take full credit for putting her little boy and these two men in this terrible situation.

I suppose the Op should just suck it up and allow himself to be relegated to the child support provider while this other man takes over the parenting duties with his biological son....is that right?

Do you have kids?

[Anonymous]

I'd find a way to stay in his life, while perhaps not being his main father figure. Obviously some of that depends on the mother (and bio dad) allowing this.

I'm sorry OP, this is such a hard situation. But I have a 2 year old and I can not imagine leaving her and not looking back. I just couldn't do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you been raising him since birth, in the same household? I have a 3 yo, and I can't imagine just up and walking out on her one day. It breaks my heart just thinking about a child having to go through that.

+1000

Yep. And this lousy mother can take full credit for putting her little boy and these two men in this terrible situation.

I suppose the Op should just suck it up and allow himself to be relegated to the child support provider while this other man takes over the parenting duties with his biological son....is that right?

Do you have kids?

Yes, I do. I have two boys who adore and look up to their daddy as a matter of fact. I can not imagine having to sit down and tell them "Mommy's got a surprise for you - meet Jerry!"

[Anonymous]

The kid is 2.5 which means he knows who Daddy is, but won't understand who "new" Daddy is. Sure he probably won't remember, but it sure as he'll will break his heart. Women that do this deserve something awful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd find a way to stay in his life, while perhaps not being his main father figure. Obviously some of that depends on the mother (and bio dad) allowing this.

I'm sorry OP, this is such a hard situation. But I have a 2 year old and I can not imagine leaving her and not looking back. I just couldn't do it.

This is it in a nutshell. So much about this situation is not in Op's control.

Op needs to work on strengthening his own position. He does not owe this woman a thing. The one to consider is this child. And if the relationship/bond is what is important (as opposed to the ka-ching! Money) then Op needs to figure out if it will be possible to remain in the picture for this kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you been raising him since birth, in the same household? I have a 3 yo, and I can't imagine just up and walking out on her one day. It breaks my heart just thinking about a child having to go through that.

+1000

Yep. And this lousy mother can take full credit for putting her little boy and these two men in this terrible situation.

I suppose the Op should just suck it up and allow himself to be relegated to the child support provider while this other man takes over the parenting duties with his biological son....is that right?

Do you have kids?

Yes, I do. I have two boys who adore and look up to their daddy as a matter of fact. I can not imagine having to sit down and tell them "Mommy's got a surprise for you - meet Jerry!"

Yes, that would be awful. I'm sure you're a good parent, and could also not imagine just abandoning your boys one day if you found out you weren't their bio parent.

I would hope that OP would get to continue his relationship with his kid, without having to pay child support. Paying child support while not getting to see his son would be horrible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you been raising him since birth, in the same household? I have a 3 yo, and I can't imagine just up and walking out on her one day. It breaks my heart just thinking about a child having to go through that.

+1000

Yep. And this lousy mother can take full credit for putting her little boy and these two men in this terrible situation.

I suppose the Op should just suck it up and allow himself to be relegated to the child support provider while this other man takes over the parenting duties with his biological son....is that right?

Do you have kids?

Yes, I do. I have two boys who adore and look up to their daddy as a matter of fact. I can not imagine having to sit down and tell them "Mommy's got a surprise for you - meet Jerry!"

Yes, that would be awful. I'm sure you're a good parent, and could also not imagine just abandoning your boys one day if you found out you weren't their bio parent.

I would hope that OP would get to continue his relationship with his kid, without having to pay child support. Paying child support while not getting to see his son would be horrible.

Op has to figure out what is in the best interests of this child. Op is under no obligation to continue a relationship with this dishonest woman. If Op and the biological can work together that might be best....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Run, don't walk

This. OP, you must be crazy to entertain any other option. Don't refer to the child as your son. He is not. He has a father who is willing to step in.

This whole thing sucks, but man up and cut your losses here. Go find a woman who will have children with you.

Oh yes, that's just great for a 2.5 year old kid to have a "new daddy" one day. No problems there. Yeah, run like the wind. You're a piece of shit.

That's on mom. Not OP's responsibility.

+1 The biological father wants to have a relationship with the child. It's very sad, but I suggest leaving the crazy people to themselves. OP deserves more. It is also highly confusing to the child to have two daddies active in his life + a mom that is not married to either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Run, don't walk

This. OP, you must be crazy to entertain any other option. Don't refer to the child as your son. He is not. He has a father who is willing to step in.

This whole thing sucks, but man up and cut your losses here. Go find a woman who will have children with you.

Oh yes, that's just great for a 2.5 year old kid to have a "new daddy" one day. No problems there. Yeah, run like the wind. You're a piece of shit.

That's on mom. Not OP's responsibility.

+1 The biological father wants to have a relationship with the child. It's very sad, but I suggest leaving the crazy people to themselves. OP deserves more. It is also highly confusing to the child to have two daddies active in his life + a mom that is not married to either.

It's on mom....to act like a human being? To not be a piece of shit? Wow. You're scary. And when your next child has problems, maybe special needs...out the door you go. Please get it snipped.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Run, don't walk

This. OP, you must be crazy to entertain any other option. Don't refer to the child as your son. He is not. He has a father who is willing to step in.

This whole thing sucks, but man up and cut your losses here. Go find a woman who will have children with you.

Oh yes, that's just great for a 2.5 year old kid to have a "new daddy" one day. No problems there. Yeah, run like the wind. You're a piece of shit.

That's on mom. Not OP's responsibility.

+1 The biological father wants to have a relationship with the child. It's very sad, but I suggest leaving the crazy people to themselves. OP deserves more. It is also highly confusing to the child to have two daddies active in his life + a mom that is not married to either.

It's on mom....to act like a human being? To not be a piece of shit? Wow. You're scary. And when your next child has problems, maybe special needs...out the door you go. Please get it snipped.

You got issues. He isn't the biological father, no need to get it snipped. Maybe you should read the post again. You don't make sense.

[Anonymous]

If the ex agrees not to have you on the hook for child support, I would walk away from the whole mess. Thankfully the bio dad does want to be involved, which will be less confusing for the little guy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:State law differs, but in most cases, people have between 2 months and 2 years to get a DNA test to remove their name from the birth certificate. If the person fails to do so in the required time period, they will be legally responsible for child support until the child reaches the age of majority, usually 18. The only way they will be excused from child support payments is if the biological parent (or another responsible individual in the court’s discretion) steps up and claims support for the child.

Well, if the Op is legally the father than the Op could fight for custody of this child? Maybe that would be the way to go. He could then sue for this woman for child support...

Well, no. Why take the child away from his mother unless she's unfit. (Which is another discussion when women pull this bs)

However, OP. If you're on the birth certificate and have been raising this child as your son, believing that to be true, then I wonder about visitation rights.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Run, don't walk

This. OP, you must be crazy to entertain any other option. Don't refer to the child as your son. He is not. He has a father who is willing to step in.

This whole thing sucks, but man up and cut your losses here. Go find a woman who will have children with you.

Oh yes, that's just great for a 2.5 year old kid to have a "new daddy" one day. No problems there. Yeah, run like the wind. You're a piece of shit.

That's on mom. Not OP's responsibility.

Wrong wrong wrong. Once we have become involved with a child, it becomes OUR responsibility. We are the adults. The child should not suffer more from this.

Tough shit. Again, it's on momma. Not OP's responsibility.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you been raising him since birth, in the same household? I have a 3 yo, and I can't imagine just up and walking out on her one day. It breaks my heart just thinking about a child having to go through that.

+1000

Yep. And this lousy mother can take full credit for putting her little boy and these two men in this terrible situation.

I suppose the Op should just suck it up and allow himself to be relegated to the child support provider while this other man takes over the parenting duties with his biological son....is that right?

Agree. PPs are ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Run, don't walk

This. OP, you must be crazy to entertain any other option. Don't refer to the child as your son. He is not. He has a father who is willing to step in.

This whole thing sucks, but man up and cut your losses here. Go find a woman who will have children with you.

Oh yes, that's just great for a 2.5 year old kid to have a "new daddy" one day. No problems there. Yeah, run like the wind. You're a piece of shit.

That's on mom. Not OP's responsibility.

+1 The biological father wants to have a relationship with the child. It's very sad, but I suggest leaving the crazy people to themselves. OP deserves more. It is also highly confusing to the child to have two daddies active in his life + a mom that is not married to either.

It's on mom....to act like a human being? To not be a piece of shit? Wow. You're scary. And when your next child has problems, maybe special needs...out the door you go. Please get it snipped.

What in the world are you talking about? It's not his child. End of story. It's heartbreaking, but he is not the baby daddy. I could see this somewhat working if OP had no hope of having genetic children, and the genetic dad was not in the picture, but the way it stands... it's freaking crazy. Who would expect a guy to raise a random child?