Back on the dating scene. Confused.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Or he could stop being an impotent ass and ask her himself than set a time

He'll probably call when he gets back. What is so fucking difficult about this?

Women: truly their own worst enemies.

She's on the trip, and he should check his manhood, ask when she's coming back, then say "great, let's go to (insert activity here) on (insert day here). I'll pick you up at (insert time here).

Jesus people, it's not fucking rocket science. No wonder dudes here complain they can't get laid

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"So it's up to him to suggest concrete plans? Why don't you take the initiative, OP? His response was perfectly reasonable."

Oh come on, this guy's totally playing. If you ask if someone is free for a date and the response is "yes, I'm free on X day," but you never follow up with a suggestion for doing something specific, then you're not really interested. If you do that multiple times, you are just stringing someone along while managing someone else.

OP, a guy who really wants to see you will make sure he makes specific plans with you with a decent amount of advanced notice. You could continue to play games with this one, but what's the point?

Does it make a difference if he already approached me with something specific but wanted to know when I'm free and I say in a few days starting on x day?

Really? Does someone need to come on the date with you and watch over you? You can ask if doing something would be appropriate too and get guidance.

Yes, your answer is fine. It's up to him to make a time/day/activity

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:**edit**

He asked about going to dinner and wanted to know when I would be *free* and I told him starting in a few days (traveling for work). All he said was sounds good. I may be overrracting here but that really put a bad tatse in my mouth. 

Why? How did you expect him to react/to say? Seems like a perfectly reasonable response to me.

To actually say how about *insert day*?

See my issue is I can't decide if this guy is just playing games or he's just not very assertive (either one I dislike)
For example:
He'll say I want to see you and ask if the weekend is good for me. I'll tell him the weekend is good but when the weekend comes he'll skirt around it. He'll ask what my plans are, when I'll be done, *then* he'll say I want to see you even though I already said I was good with seeing him. Or ask me where I'm at becsuse he wants to know if I'm out and about instsad if jusr saying hey are you free I want to see you.

You should have put all this in your OP. Just don't plan on seeing him, since it's casual, and stay on the market.

Thanks. To be honest that's what I had been doing. He asks almost weekly to see me and usually I have something come up on my end but still the lack of planning is just something I don't like.

Sounds as if you don't really care if you see him or not. Why are you fucking with him?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Or he could stop being an impotent ass and ask her himself than set a time

He'll probably call when he gets back. What is so fucking difficult about this?

Women: truly their own worst enemies.

She's on the trip, and he should check his manhood, ask when she's coming back, then say "great, let's go to (insert activity here) on (insert day here). I'll pick you up at (insert time here).

Jesus people, it's not fucking rocket science. No wonder dudes here complain they can't get laid

So you pretty much think OP's guy lacks balls?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:**edit**

He asked about going to dinner and wanted to know when I would be *free* and I told him starting in a few days (traveling for work). All he said was sounds good. I may be overrracting here but that really put a bad tatse in my mouth. 

Why? How did you expect him to react/to say? Seems like a perfectly reasonable response to me.

To actually say how about *insert day*?

See my issue is I can't decide if this guy is just playing games or he's just not very assertive (either one I dislike)
For example:
He'll say I want to see you and ask if the weekend is good for me. I'll tell him the weekend is good but when the weekend comes he'll skirt around it. He'll ask what my plans are, when I'll be done, *then* he'll say I want to see you even though I already said I was good with seeing him. Or ask me where I'm at becsuse he wants to know if I'm out and about instsad if jusr saying hey are you free I want to see you.

You should have put all this in your OP. Just don't plan on seeing him, since it's casual, and stay on the market.

Thanks. To be honest that's what I had been doing. He asks almost weekly to see me and usually I have something come up on my end but still the lack of planning is just something I don't like.

So just set up a specific date when he calls you. Say, "I'm traveling for work but how about brunch on Sunday'?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:May be so because I have been the one to turn him down the last few times he asked but I'm not sure. Can't decide if he's playing it cool or playing games.

In other words, you have communicated that you are uninterested, but you are on here complaining about receiving mixed signals.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:**edit**

He asked about going to dinner and wanted to know when I would be *free* and I told him starting in a few days (traveling for work). All he said was sounds good. I may be overrracting here but that really put a bad tatse in my mouth. 

Why? How did you expect him to react/to say? Seems like a perfectly reasonable response to me.

To actually say how about *insert day*?

See my issue is I can't decide if this guy is just playing games or he's just not very assertive (either one I dislike)
For example:
He'll say I want to see you and ask if the weekend is good for me. I'll tell him the weekend is good but when the weekend comes he'll skirt around it. He'll ask what my plans are, when I'll be done, *then* he'll say I want to see you even though I already said I was good with seeing him. Or ask me where I'm at becsuse he wants to know if I'm out and about instsad if jusr saying hey are you free I want to see you.

You should have put all this in your OP. Just don't plan on seeing him, since it's casual, and stay on the market.

Thanks. To be honest that's what I had been doing. He asks almost weekly to see me and usually I have something come up on my end but still the lack of planning is just something I don't like.

So he has been inquiring about your availability for several weeks but doesn't follow up once he has the information? This is easy, there is another woman out there. He is casually dating or thinking about ending a relationship or something. This non-committal behavior screams other chick

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Or he could stop being an impotent ass and ask her himself than set a time

He'll probably call when he gets back. What is so fucking difficult about this?

Women: truly their own worst enemies.

She's on the trip, and he should check his manhood, ask when she's coming back, then say "great, let's go to (insert activity here) on (insert day here). I'll pick you up at (insert time here).

Jesus people, it's not fucking rocket science. No wonder dudes here complain they can't get laid

So you pretty much think OP's guy lacks balls?

PP here, yes. She must too, she's not exactly jumping at his other offers

[Anonymous]

OMG!

[Anonymous]

So you have been flaky but you are questioning why you aren't one of his iPhone favorites?

[Anonymous]

travel Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:**edit**

He asked about going to dinner and wanted to know when I would be *free* and I told him starting in a few days (traveling for work). All he said was sounds good. I may be overrracting here but that really put a bad tatse in my mouth. 

Why? How did you expect him to react/to say? Seems like a perfectly reasonable response to me.

To actually say how about *insert day*?

See my issue is I can't decide if this guy is just playing games or he's just not very assertive (either one I dislike)
For example:
He'll say I want to see you and ask if the weekend is good for me. I'll tell him the weekend is good but when the weekend comes he'll skirt around it. He'll ask what my plans are, when I'll be done, *then* he'll say I want to see you even though I already said I was good with seeing him. Or ask me where I'm at becsuse he wants to know if I'm out and about instsad if jusr saying hey are you free I want to see you.

You should have put all this in your OP. Just don't plan on seeing him, since it's casual, and stay on the market.

Thanks. To be honest that's what I had been doing. He asks almost weekly to see me and usually I have something come up on my end but still the lack of planning is just something I don't like.

So he has been inquiring about your availability for several weeks but doesn't follow up once he has the information? This is easy, there is another woman out there. He is casually dating or thinking about ending a relationship or something. This non-committal behavior screams other chick

No he's been asking and I've been the one who has had some reason or another why I couldn't see him (work, travel ect.). My issue is him saying sounds good instead of something concrete.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Or he could stop being an impotent ass and ask her himself than set a time

He'll probably call when he gets back. What is so fucking difficult about this?

Women: truly their own worst enemies.

She's on the trip, and he should check his manhood, ask when she's coming back, then say "great, let's go to (insert activity here) on (insert day here). I'll pick you up at (insert time here).

Jesus people, it's not fucking rocket science. No wonder dudes here complain they can't get laid

So you pretty much think OP's guy lacks balls?

PP here, yes. She must too, she's not exactly jumping at his other offers

Well OP there you have it. Sounds like you need to light some fire under this. I'm sure this will give him so reassurance if you do and probably will make things run smoother.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:travel Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:**edit**

He asked about going to dinner and wanted to know when I would be *free* and I told him starting in a few days (traveling for work). All he said was sounds good. I may be overrracting here but that really put a bad tatse in my mouth. 

Why? How did you expect him to react/to say? Seems like a perfectly reasonable response to me.

To actually say how about *insert day*?

See my issue is I can't decide if this guy is just playing games or he's just not very assertive (either one I dislike)
For example:
He'll say I want to see you and ask if the weekend is good for me. I'll tell him the weekend is good but when the weekend comes he'll skirt around it. He'll ask what my plans are, when I'll be done, *then* he'll say I want to see you even though I already said I was good with seeing him. Or ask me where I'm at becsuse he wants to know if I'm out and about instsad if jusr saying hey are you free I want to see you.

You should have put all this in your OP. Just don't plan on seeing him, since it's casual, and stay on the market.

Thanks. To be honest that's what I had been doing. He asks almost weekly to see me and usually I have something come up on my end but still the lack of planning is just something I don't like.

So he has been inquiring about your availability for several weeks but doesn't follow up once he has the information? This is easy, there is another woman out there. He is casually dating or thinking about ending a relationship or something. This non-committal behavior screams other chick

No he's been asking and I've been the one who has had some reason or another why I couldn't see him (work, travel ect.). My issue is him saying sounds good instead of something concrete.

You need to be more concrete with him, too. "I'm out of town the next few das but free on Monday. Is that good for you?"

[Anonymous]

Let me get this straight - he's been askin you out a few times, you've flaked on him, and now you are mad he doesn't make plans after you say "sorry I'm busy"?

Wtf - how is he supposed to suggest a different concrete time without knowing your schedule and with you giving a track record of being unavailable?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Let me get this straight - he's been askin you out a few times, you've flaked on him, and now you are mad he doesn't make plans after you say "sorry I'm busy"?

Wtf - how is he supposed to suggest a different concrete time without knowing your schedule and with you giving a track record of being unavailable?

I told him the day I would get back. Not mad, confused. Like one of the PP said if a guy is really interested he's going to make concrete plans if he knows you're available. I was raised to think the same way so that's why I said I was confused.