Feeling sorry for my single partying friends in their 30's

[Anonymous]

PP,

How would you be living if you were still single? Or if you became a widow? I can tell you, if you find yourself widowed or divorced, your social life will suffer. Married folks as a group are not always kind to the singletons of the worlds!

[Anonymous]

Ugh, I am old and boring and have been married forever, but I would much rather hang out with her than you!

IMO, there's no way a 33 yo woman can be considered a cougar. Jeeezus.

[Anonymous]

OP, twenty bucks that you now feel like you married too young and secretly hate your own life in the 'burbs, where a big night out is dinner at Olive Garden.

Get over yourself. Your friend sounds a lot happier than you do.

[Anonymous]

It totally, totally depends whether the OP's friend(s) are happy doing it. If they are, more power to them. If they WANT to settle down, I can see that it's kind of sad.

[Anonymous]

Sounds exactly like my life when I was 33. I was single and "looking", sure, but I was having a hell of a lot of fun while doing it.

Damn, I miss those days.

[Anonymous]

So what IS the magic age when it's too old to "party"? Is it okay when you're 29, but as soon as you turn 30 you need to limit yourself to book clubs and knitting circles? What about men? Is football still okay at 30 as long as there's no beer involved?

Please, enlighten us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP I know exactly what you're talking about and my friends will often call or come over to talk about the disastrous hook ups.

They look like cougars on the outside and the jerks complimenting them on a Sat night boosts the ego but when Sunday morning comes and the bed is empty and they get a headache/hangover they call to cry on my shoulder (mostly ecause they know we'll be awake and sober on Sunday at 7am LOL)

They often invite themselves for family meals. They feel so lonely deep inside. I tried suggesting cooking classes, speed dating, book clubs and online dating sites but they say they're not "that" desperate yet.

DH picked me in a bar among 5 other girls and we were both turning 30 at the time (and already felt like part of the older crowd) I can imagine how much worse it must be now...

did it ever occur to you that men don't do cooking classes or book clubs--those are horrible places to meet men. actually it is relatively easy and low pressure to meet guys watching football--especially if you go with a big group of people.

[Anonymous]

wow! 33 is not old by any means, to be single and going out -- especially in DC! a LOT of women in their early 30s are never-married.

that doesn't mean they don't want to eventually be, but how can you judge them for going out and having fun?

they should go out and enjoy their free time and single status!

[Anonymous]

I think you need to get out more. There's a panera bread in front of my store and I've seen several groups of guys and girls disuse g books. Also there are cooking classes made just for singles to meet. Did you know there are websites on the Internet where you can meet guys and date????? I guess you've been out of the maket for a while. Haha!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP I know exactly what you're talking about and my friends will often call or come over to talk about the disastrous hook ups.

They look like cougars on the outside and the jerks complimenting them on a Sat night boosts the ego but when Sunday morning comes and the bed is empty and they get a headache/hangover they call to cry on my shoulder (mostly ecause they know we'll be awake and sober on Sunday at 7am LOL)

They often invite themselves for family meals. They feel so lonely deep inside. I tried suggesting cooking classes, speed dating, book clubs and online dating sites but they say they're not "that" desperate yet.

DH picked me in a bar among 5 other girls and we were both turning 30 at the time (and already felt like part of the older crowd) I can imagine how much worse it must be now...

did it ever occur to you that men don't do cooking classes or book clubs--those are horrible places to meet men. actually it is relatively easy and low pressure to meet guys watching football--especially if you go with a big group of people.

[Anonymous]

I didn't meet my husband until I was 35. In a long term relationship until I was 30. Between 30-35, I was insane!! Had a blast, travelled all over the world, slept in late, partied hard and worked hard. Believe me, I was not feeling sorry for myself and or looking at my married friends, wishing I had their life. It was awesome and now that I have 2 kids under 4, Im so grateful for that time!

[Anonymous]

Oh, I'd love me some fun with a younger guy. I'm in love with hubby, but I sure can dream....I have a 28yr old partying hottie that works for me now and what I'd do to that.....

[Anonymous]

33 years old is still totally in the normal range for partying and having fun in this town. You sound like someone I wouldn't want to hang out with, OP. I'm 39 and have a ton of single friends who are having a great time in their 30's and 40's. (and some married friends, and some friends w/ kids.) I join them whenever I have a free night from my daughter, about once a week. I don't get wasted, but I do have a couple glasses of wine or a few beers and I have a great time catching up with friends and meeting new ones. Plenty of my friends didn't meet a marry-able guy till their mid-30's so they just had fun till then. She sounds like she might actually be a lot happier than you, OP. Being single and childless can be perfectly fulfilling, believe it or not.

Now if she ever does ask your advice, the thing you *could* tell her is that she should make sure that she finds a guy who is not *just* a partier - who is comfortable in settings where it's not all about drinking. It can be frustrating to date someone who is drunk all the time (been there) or who doesn't want to do anything on a nice fall afternoon but sit in a sports bar and watch football all day.

(oh, and she's totally not a cougar - at worst, she's a puma.)

[Anonymous]

My 31 year old divorced cousin (also a parent of a 4 yr old) just posted (on facebook) photos of her and three of her bikini clad friends making out with a blow up doll at a a co-ed bachelorette party. Makes the family proud.

[Anonymous]

Don't worry about it. I'm sure she doesn't feel sorry for you.

[Anonymous]

Don't feel "embarrassed" for her - save your energy (I won't say empathy because I don't really think you have much for her). She has nothing to be embarrasses about. Nothing.