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Feeling sorry for my single partying friends in their 30's
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Anonymous
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Only one of them is truly my friend, and I love her, but I feel so embarrassed and sad for her. She is 33, not ancient by any means, but too old to be out at those kinds of bars on the weekends (the guys are in their early-mid twenties, but if you ask her she'll say that there is a mix into their 30's. Really not true, 95% of the guys and girls are younger). She also does these marathon drinking football Sunday things all season long. I know she wants to meet someone, but she isn't going to find him there. And it isn't all about catching some man, she really should have other outlets for fun, right? She has never dated anyone her age or older. He is always a few years younger.
Obviously I can't say anything, just be supportive, but does anyone else have a friend or friends like this? That just refuse to realize how old they are? |
Anonymous
| Wow OP. I can't help but read, something else into your post. Jealousy or resentment? Maybe not but your post sure came across that way. Let people live how they want to live. Your friend may find someone tomorrow, settle down, get married and have kids, or she may not, but I would either do her a favor and stay away. Doesn't sound like you are that much of a friend and you sound really superior and condescending. With friends like that.... |
Anonymous
| Sounds like she likes drinking and younger men. What do you care? |
Anonymous
| Feeling sorry or a tad jealous? |
Anonymous
| soon or if she hasn't she will get a small convertable and start hanging out at Clyde's |
Anonymous
That was funny. |
Anonymous
| I just want her to be happy, and I am definitely not jealous. I feel genuine embarrassment for her, especially when I hear comments behind her back from other guys, jerks! But younger guys have called her a cougar, etc. |
Anonymous
Where are YOU hanging out that you are overhearing "younger guys" calling her a cougar. You sound a little high school yourself. |
Anonymous
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OP,
Have you heard the term "smug marrieds" before? You sound like one of them. Your friend might be enjoying herself. News flash: Some single people look at their married friends and do not want that life for them. Maybe your friend is conflicted about what she wants, or is happier than you think she is? Or maybe she's trying to get her partying side out of her system in anticipation of settling down? |
Anonymous
| for themselves. |
Anonymous
| hah, I read the OP's post and thought DAMN, that sounds awesome! seriously. I am 42 (male) and married with 2 kids. Would LOVE to be able to pound beers all day watching college football with my buddies while I hit on girls. (and trust me, you can meet people that way. I often did). |
Anonymous
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I bet your DH wouldn't mind you taking a page from her book. Not everyone gets boring when they get older.
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Anonymous
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Wow, OP. Why exactly do you feel sorry for her? Because she's not enlightened like you?
At 30, I was single and going to those bars (as well as most of my friends too). How do you know the age mix? Because its not all just-out-of-college 20-something kids in these bars. 33 is not a cougar. |
Anonymous
| I think the bigger question here is whether she is feeling sorry for herself. If not, then clearly you don't need to do anything other than live vicariously. I know it's hard not to see others through the lens of your own values/lifestyle choices. But try and see if this is what *you* want for your friend or what *she* wants for herself. |
Anonymous
| MYOB. |