Best way to change the rules regarding boys in the bedroom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:[img]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD is 18 and will be a senior this fall. She’s had the same boy best friend since sophomore year. They’ve always been completely platonic.

In the past I’ve let this boy hang out in DD’s bedroom, even with the door closed. It’s never been a problem.

The boy has been out of town for the summer but they keep in touch through calls and texting. Lately ive had an inkling that they might be developing feelings for each other. I wouldn’t be surprised if they start dating when he returns this fall.

If they start dating I definitely don’t want him in DD’s bedroom, but I don’t know exactly how to present this to her. I don’t feel comfortable telling her that I think she might start dating her friend. I don’t want to push her in that direction. How should I proceed?

If they’re going to boink, they’re going to boink. It matters little whether or not they are allowed by you to use her room.

Yes, they will figure out a way to do it if they want to but why encourage it and make it easier for them? Allowing them to hang out in a closed bedroom screams, "Go for it, kids. Bonk away!"

Not really, it says that you did your job asa a parent to educate the child and trust her judgement.

Maybe they want some privacy to have a personal conversation.

18 YOs do not have good “judgment.” I don’t care how well they are raised.

Your “judgement” is not that great either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[img]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD is 18 and will be a senior this fall. She’s had the same boy best friend since sophomore year. They’ve always been completely platonic.

In the past I’ve let this boy hang out in DD’s bedroom, even with the door closed. It’s never been a problem.

The boy has been out of town for the summer but they keep in touch through calls and texting. Lately ive had an inkling that they might be developing feelings for each other. I wouldn’t be surprised if they start dating when he returns this fall.

If they start dating I definitely don’t want him in DD’s bedroom, but I don’t know exactly how to present this to her. I don’t feel comfortable telling her that I think she might start dating her friend. I don’t want to push her in that direction. How should I proceed?

If they’re going to boink, they’re going to boink. It matters little whether or not they are allowed by you to use her room.

Yes, they will figure out a way to do it if they want to but why encourage it and make it easier for them? Allowing them to hang out in a closed bedroom screams, "Go for it, kids. Bonk away!"

Not really, it says that you did your job asa a parent to educate the child and trust her judgement.

Maybe they want some privacy to have a personal conversation.

18 YOs do not have good “judgment.” I don’t care how well they are raised.

Your “judgement” is not that great either.

I spent 75K on my divorce 30 years ago, and my one free takeaway, was that judgment is spelled "judgment".

I don't know if you are trying to do a gotcha on the spelling, but if you are in the US, I think you just "failed".

Here is AI on judgment vs judgement:

The words "judgment" and "judgement" are essentially the same, referring to the ability to make considered decisions or the outcome of a decision, particularly in legal contexts. The difference lies primarily in spelling, with "judgment" being the preferred spelling in American English and "judgement" being more common in British English.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[img]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD is 18 and will be a senior this fall. She’s had the same boy best friend since sophomore year. They’ve always been completely platonic.

In the past I’ve let this boy hang out in DD’s bedroom, even with the door closed. It’s never been a problem.

The boy has been out of town for the summer but they keep in touch through calls and texting. Lately ive had an inkling that they might be developing feelings for each other. I wouldn’t be surprised if they start dating when he returns this fall.

If they start dating I definitely don’t want him in DD’s bedroom, but I don’t know exactly how to present this to her. I don’t feel comfortable telling her that I think she might start dating her friend. I don’t want to push her in that direction. How should I proceed?

If they’re going to boink, they’re going to boink. It matters little whether or not they are allowed by you to use her room.

Yes, they will figure out a way to do it if they want to but why encourage it and make it easier for them? Allowing them to hang out in a closed bedroom screams, "Go for it, kids. Bonk away!"

Not really, it says that you did your job asa a parent to educate the child and trust her judgement.

Maybe they want some privacy to have a personal conversation.

18 YOs do not have good “judgment.” I don’t care how well they are raised.

Your “judgement” is not that great either.

I spent 75K on my divorce 30 years ago, and my one free takeaway, was that judgment is spelled "judgment".

I don't know if you are trying to do a gotcha on the spelling, but if you are in the US, I think you just "failed".

Here is AI on judgment vs judgement:

The words "judgment" and "judgement" are essentially the same, referring to the ability to make considered decisions or the outcome of a decision, particularly in legal contexts. The difference lies primarily in spelling, with "judgment" being the preferred spelling in American English and "judgement" being more common in British English.

Ah, of course you’re long time divorced. No surprise here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[img]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD is 18 and will be a senior this fall. She’s had the same boy best friend since sophomore year. They’ve always been completely platonic.

In the past I’ve let this boy hang out in DD’s bedroom, even with the door closed. It’s never been a problem.

The boy has been out of town for the summer but they keep in touch through calls and texting. Lately ive had an inkling that they might be developing feelings for each other. I wouldn’t be surprised if they start dating when he returns this fall.

If they start dating I definitely don’t want him in DD’s bedroom, but I don’t know exactly how to present this to her. I don’t feel comfortable telling her that I think she might start dating her friend. I don’t want to push her in that direction. How should I proceed?

If they’re going to boink, they’re going to boink. It matters little whether or not they are allowed by you to use her room.

Yes, they will figure out a way to do it if they want to but why encourage it and make it easier for them? Allowing them to hang out in a closed bedroom screams, "Go for it, kids. Bonk away!"

Not really, it says that you did your job asa a parent to educate the child and trust her judgement.

Maybe they want some privacy to have a personal conversation.

18 YOs do not have good “judgment.” I don’t care how well they are raised.

Your “judgement” is not that great either.

I spent 75K on my divorce 30 years ago, and my one free takeaway, was that judgment is spelled "judgment".

I don't know if you are trying to do a gotcha on the spelling, but if you are in the US, I think you just "failed".

Here is AI on judgment vs judgement:

The words "judgment" and "judgement" are essentially the same, referring to the ability to make considered decisions or the outcome of a decision, particularly in legal contexts. The difference lies primarily in spelling, with "judgment" being the preferred spelling in American English and "judgement" being more common in British English.

Ah, of course you’re long time divorced. No surprise here.

Well I remarried 2 years after my divorce and we just celebrated our 30th anniversary. And we have a 26 yo daughter. Not sure of your point?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[img]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD is 18 and will be a senior this fall. She’s had the same boy best friend since sophomore year. They’ve always been completely platonic.

In the past I’ve let this boy hang out in DD’s bedroom, even with the door closed. It’s never been a problem.

The boy has been out of town for the summer but they keep in touch through calls and texting. Lately ive had an inkling that they might be developing feelings for each other. I wouldn’t be surprised if they start dating when he returns this fall.

If they start dating I definitely don’t want him in DD’s bedroom, but I don’t know exactly how to present this to her. I don’t feel comfortable telling her that I think she might start dating her friend. I don’t want to push her in that direction. How should I proceed?

If they’re going to boink, they’re going to boink. It matters little whether or not they are allowed by you to use her room.

Yes, they will figure out a way to do it if they want to but why encourage it and make it easier for them? Allowing them to hang out in a closed bedroom screams, "Go for it, kids. Bonk away!"

Not really, it says that you did your job asa a parent to educate the child and trust her judgement.

Maybe they want some privacy to have a personal conversation.

18 YOs do not have good “judgment.” I don’t care how well they are raised.

Your “judgement” is not that great either.

I spent 75K on my divorce 30 years ago, and my one free takeaway, was that judgment is spelled "judgment".

I don't know if you are trying to do a gotcha on the spelling, but if you are in the US, I think you just "failed".

Here is AI on judgment vs judgement:

The words "judgment" and "judgement" are essentially the same, referring to the ability to make considered decisions or the outcome of a decision, particularly in legal contexts. The difference lies primarily in spelling, with "judgment" being the preferred spelling in American English and "judgement" being more common in British English.

Ah, of course you’re long time divorced. No surprise here.

Well I remarried 2 years after my divorce and we just celebrated our 30th anniversary. And we have a 26 yo daughter. Not sure of your point?

Lady, you have quite an abrasive personality turning into grammar police in the age of typing on the phone. People have different language and cultural backgrounds, if you think knowing the American spelling of judgement (lol) and doing a quick google search make you superior in some way or you need to point that out, you’re pathetic and cringe.

Being past 60 you’re in no position to give teens and young adults any dating and sex advice. Likely your daughter is just tuning you out and puts up with your insufferable droning about how the young generation is corrupted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[img]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD is 18 and will be a senior this fall. She’s had the same boy best friend since sophomore year. They’ve always been completely platonic.

In the past I’ve let this boy hang out in DD’s bedroom, even with the door closed. It’s never been a problem.

The boy has been out of town for the summer but they keep in touch through calls and texting. Lately ive had an inkling that they might be developing feelings for each other. I wouldn’t be surprised if they start dating when he returns this fall.

If they start dating I definitely don’t want him in DD’s bedroom, but I don’t know exactly how to present this to her. I don’t feel comfortable telling her that I think she might start dating her friend. I don’t want to push her in that direction. How should I proceed?

If they’re going to boink, they’re going to boink. It matters little whether or not they are allowed by you to use her room.

Yes, they will figure out a way to do it if they want to but why encourage it and make it easier for them? Allowing them to hang out in a closed bedroom screams, "Go for it, kids. Bonk away!"

Not really, it says that you did your job asa a parent to educate the child and trust her judgement.

Maybe they want some privacy to have a personal conversation.

18 YOs do not have good “judgment.” I don’t care how well they are raised.

Your “judgement” is not that great either.

I spent 75K on my divorce 30 years ago, and my one free takeaway, was that judgment is spelled "judgment".

I don't know if you are trying to do a gotcha on the spelling, but if you are in the US, I think you just "failed".

Here is AI on judgment vs judgement:

The words "judgment" and "judgement" are essentially the same, referring to the ability to make considered decisions or the outcome of a decision, particularly in legal contexts. The difference lies primarily in spelling, with "judgment" being the preferred spelling in American English and "judgement" being more common in British English.

Ah, of course you’re long time divorced. No surprise here.

Well I remarried 2 years after my divorce and we just celebrated our 30th anniversary. And we have a 26 yo daughter. Not sure of your point?

Lady, you have quite an abrasive personality turning into grammar police in the age of typing on the phone. People have different language and cultural backgrounds, if you think knowing the American spelling of judgement (lol) and doing a quick google search make you superior in some way or you need to point that out, you’re pathetic and cringe.

Being past 60 you’re in no position to give teens and young adults any dating and sex advice. Likely your daughter is just tuning you out and puts up with your insufferable droning about how the young generation is corrupted.

And you’re just another Democrat millennial sheep.

[Anonymous]

So for those saying OP created the problem- what happens if you allow antother kids in the room before knowing if the kid is gay or straight?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[img]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD is 18 and will be a senior this fall. She’s had the same boy best friend since sophomore year. They’ve always been completely platonic.

In the past I’ve let this boy hang out in DD’s bedroom, even with the door closed. It’s never been a problem.

The boy has been out of town for the summer but they keep in touch through calls and texting. Lately ive had an inkling that they might be developing feelings for each other. I wouldn’t be surprised if they start dating when he returns this fall.

If they start dating I definitely don’t want him in DD’s bedroom, but I don’t know exactly how to present this to her. I don’t feel comfortable telling her that I think she might start dating her friend. I don’t want to push her in that direction. How should I proceed?

If they’re going to boink, they’re going to boink. It matters little whether or not they are allowed by you to use her room.

Yes, they will figure out a way to do it if they want to but why encourage it and make it easier for them? Allowing them to hang out in a closed bedroom screams, "Go for it, kids. Bonk away!"

Not really, it says that you did your job asa a parent to educate the child and trust her judgement.

Maybe they want some privacy to have a personal conversation.

18 YOs do not have good “judgment.” I don’t care how well they are raised.

Your “judgement” is not that great either.

I spent 75K on my divorce 30 years ago, and my one free takeaway, was that judgment is spelled "judgment".

I don't know if you are trying to do a gotcha on the spelling, but if you are in the US, I think you just "failed".

Here is AI on judgment vs judgement:

The words "judgment" and "judgement" are essentially the same, referring to the ability to make considered decisions or the outcome of a decision, particularly in legal contexts. The difference lies primarily in spelling, with "judgment" being the preferred spelling in American English and "judgement" being more common in British English.

Ah, of course you’re long time divorced. No surprise here.

Well I remarried 2 years after my divorce and we just celebrated our 30th anniversary. And we have a 26 yo daughter. Not sure of your point?

Lady, you have quite an abrasive personality turning into grammar police in the age of typing on the phone. People have different language and cultural backgrounds, if you think knowing the American spelling of judgement (lol) and doing a quick google search make you superior in some way or you need to point that out, you’re pathetic and cringe.

Being past 60 you’re in no position to give teens and young adults any dating and sex advice. Likely your daughter is just tuning you out and puts up with your insufferable droning about how the young generation is corrupted.

What?? I was just calling out the person who corrected someone using "judgment" and implying it was spelled "judgement". When in fact in the US, "judgment" is the preferred spelling.

So now *I'm* the grammar police? I was correcting the grammar police who were trying to correct someone else and were ignorant to the correct spelling.

You must have been the American who wrongly thought judgement was correct.

I can give 45-55 year old mothers advice who have 15 yo kids. I'm only a few short years past that.

My daughter doesn't tune me out. She lives in her own apartment and does whatever she wants. Calls a few times a week to catch up, as she's in her first independent job. My advice when she became sexually active - get on birth control!!

And my advice to moms of teen girls - don't allow closed doors at all!

Good grief...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So for those saying OP created the problem- what happens if you allow another kids in the room before knowing if the kid is gay or straight?

Simple - don't allow closed doors. Preferably, if you have other spaces, discourage bedrooms and encourage teems to entertain in the living room, on the back patio, in the game room if you have one. Gay or straight doesn't matter.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thank you for all the helpful responses. For those who asked, I’m certain they are not dating at this point. They did not go to junior prom together, and my DD hangs out (goes on dates) with other guys occasionally.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[img]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD is 18 and will be a senior this fall. She’s had the same boy best friend since sophomore year. They’ve always been completely platonic.

In the past I’ve let this boy hang out in DD’s bedroom, even with the door closed. It’s never been a problem.

The boy has been out of town for the summer but they keep in touch through calls and texting. Lately ive had an inkling that they might be developing feelings for each other. I wouldn’t be surprised if they start dating when he returns this fall.

If they start dating I definitely don’t want him in DD’s bedroom, but I don’t know exactly how to present this to her. I don’t feel comfortable telling her that I think she might start dating her friend. I don’t want to push her in that direction. How should I proceed?

If they’re going to boink, they’re going to boink. It matters little whether or not they are allowed by you to use her room.

Yes, they will figure out a way to do it if they want to but why encourage it and make it easier for them? Allowing them to hang out in a closed bedroom screams, "Go for it, kids. Bonk away!"

Not really, it says that you did your job asa a parent to educate the child and trust her judgement.

Maybe they want some privacy to have a personal conversation.

18 YOs do not have good “judgment.” I don’t care how well they are raised.

Your “judgement” is not that great either.

I spent 75K on my divorce 30 years ago, and my one free takeaway, was that judgment is spelled "judgment".

I don't know if you are trying to do a gotcha on the spelling, but if you are in the US, I think you just "failed".

Here is AI on judgment vs judgement:

The words "judgment" and "judgement" are essentially the same, referring to the ability to make considered decisions or the outcome of a decision, particularly in legal contexts. The difference lies primarily in spelling, with "judgment" being the preferred spelling in American English and "judgement" being more common in British English.

Ah, of course you’re long time divorced. No surprise here.

Well I remarried 2 years after my divorce and we just celebrated our 30th anniversary. And we have a 26 yo daughter. Not sure of your point?

Lady, you have quite an abrasive personality turning into grammar police in the age of typing on the phone. People have different language and cultural backgrounds, if you think knowing the American spelling of judgement (lol) and doing a quick google search make you superior in some way or you need to point that out, you’re pathetic and cringe.

Being past 60 you’re in no position to give teens and young adults any dating and sex advice. Likely your daughter is just tuning you out and puts up with your insufferable droning about how the young generation is corrupted.

What?? I was just calling out the person who corrected someone using "judgment" and implying it was spelled "judgement". When in fact in the US, "judgment" is the preferred spelling.

So now *I'm* the grammar police? I was correcting the grammar police who were trying to correct someone else and were ignorant to the correct spelling.

You must have been the American who wrongly thought judgement was correct.

I can give 45-55 year old mothers advice who have 15 yo kids. I'm only a few short years past that.

My daughter doesn't tune me out. She lives in her own apartment and does whatever she wants. Calls a few times a week to catch up, as she's in her first independent job. My advice when she became sexually active - get on birth control!!

And my advice to moms of teen girls - don't allow closed doors at all!

Good grief...

What a shocker, the 65 year old lady is full of righteous indignation from two young adults wanting to close the door and have some privacy because “respect my authoritah”.

How’s that conversation is even going to be like? Larla, I don’t want you to have sex in my house, that’s disrespectful and when the bf comes over you need to leave the door open so everyone can check no shenanigans are taking place. Then you’ll run down the hallway to make sure his hand is not under her blouse.

Don’t you have something better to do? It’s always shriveled post menopausal women with zero interest in sex that are most freaked out about young people having fun.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[img]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD is 18 and will be a senior this fall. She’s had the same boy best friend since sophomore year. They’ve always been completely platonic.

In the past I’ve let this boy hang out in DD’s bedroom, even with the door closed. It’s never been a problem.

The boy has been out of town for the summer but they keep in touch through calls and texting. Lately ive had an inkling that they might be developing feelings for each other. I wouldn’t be surprised if they start dating when he returns this fall.

If they start dating I definitely don’t want him in DD’s bedroom, but I don’t know exactly how to present this to her. I don’t feel comfortable telling her that I think she might start dating her friend. I don’t want to push her in that direction. How should I proceed?

If they’re going to boink, they’re going to boink. It matters little whether or not they are allowed by you to use her room.

Yes, they will figure out a way to do it if they want to but why encourage it and make it easier for them? Allowing them to hang out in a closed bedroom screams, "Go for it, kids. Bonk away!"

Not really, it says that you did your job asa a parent to educate the child and trust her judgement.

Maybe they want some privacy to have a personal conversation.

18 YOs do not have good “judgment.” I don’t care how well they are raised.

Your “judgement” is not that great either.

I spent 75K on my divorce 30 years ago, and my one free takeaway, was that judgment is spelled "judgment".

I don't know if you are trying to do a gotcha on the spelling, but if you are in the US, I think you just "failed".

Here is AI on judgment vs judgement:

The words "judgment" and "judgement" are essentially the same, referring to the ability to make considered decisions or the outcome of a decision, particularly in legal contexts. The difference lies primarily in spelling, with "judgment" being the preferred spelling in American English and "judgement" being more common in British English.

Ah, of course you’re long time divorced. No surprise here.

Well I remarried 2 years after my divorce and we just celebrated our 30th anniversary. And we have a 26 yo daughter. Not sure of your point?

Lady, you have quite an abrasive personality turning into grammar police in the age of typing on the phone. People have different language and cultural backgrounds, if you think knowing the American spelling of judgement (lol) and doing a quick google search make you superior in some way or you need to point that out, you’re pathetic and cringe.

Being past 60 you’re in no position to give teens and young adults any dating and sex advice. Likely your daughter is just tuning you out and puts up with your insufferable droning about how the young generation is corrupted.

What?? I was just calling out the person who corrected someone using "judgment" and implying it was spelled "judgement". When in fact in the US, "judgment" is the preferred spelling.

So now *I'm* the grammar police? I was correcting the grammar police who were trying to correct someone else and were ignorant to the correct spelling.

You must have been the American who wrongly thought judgement was correct.

I can give 45-55 year old mothers advice who have 15 yo kids. I'm only a few short years past that.

My daughter doesn't tune me out. She lives in her own apartment and does whatever she wants. Calls a few times a week to catch up, as she's in her first independent job. My advice when she became sexually active - get on birth control!!

And my advice to moms of teen girls - don't allow closed doors at all!

Good grief...

What a shocker, the 65 year old lady is full of righteous indignation from two young adults wanting to close the door and have some privacy because “respect my authoritah”.

How’s that conversation is even going to be like? Larla, I don’t want you to have sex in my house, that’s disrespectful and when the bf comes over you need to leave the door open so everyone can check no shenanigans are taking place. Then you’ll run down the hallway to make sure his hand is not under her blouse.

Don’t you have something better to do? It’s always shriveled post menopausal women with zero interest in sex that are most freaked out about young people having fun.

Oh, you're so far off the mark on me, but so what.

More than half the posters here agree with me to have a doors open policy with teenagers.

I personally don't care once they are over 18. We have done vacation rentals when my son was in college and brought his girlfriend and we gave them their own room. If my daughter visited us now and brought a boyfriend, I wouldn't care if they want to sleep (and do whatever!) in her room.

But I didn't allow my teens in HS to have visitors in their bedroom with the door closed. If other parents think it's fine, I'm ok with them having house rules as they see fit.

But I don't think my opinion is unusual or warrants such hostile insults!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[img]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD is 18 and will be a senior this fall. She’s had the same boy best friend since sophomore year. They’ve always been completely platonic.

In the past I’ve let this boy hang out in DD’s bedroom, even with the door closed. It’s never been a problem.

The boy has been out of town for the summer but they keep in touch through calls and texting. Lately ive had an inkling that they might be developing feelings for each other. I wouldn’t be surprised if they start dating when he returns this fall.

If they start dating I definitely don’t want him in DD’s bedroom, but I don’t know exactly how to present this to her. I don’t feel comfortable telling her that I think she might start dating her friend. I don’t want to push her in that direction. How should I proceed?

If they’re going to boink, they’re going to boink. It matters little whether or not they are allowed by you to use her room.

Yes, they will figure out a way to do it if they want to but why encourage it and make it easier for them? Allowing them to hang out in a closed bedroom screams, "Go for it, kids. Bonk away!"

Not really, it says that you did your job asa a parent to educate the child and trust her judgement.

Maybe they want some privacy to have a personal conversation.

18 YOs do not have good “judgment.” I don’t care how well they are raised.

Your “judgement” is not that great either.

I spent 75K on my divorce 30 years ago, and my one free takeaway, was that judgment is spelled "judgment".

I don't know if you are trying to do a gotcha on the spelling, but if you are in the US, I think you just "failed".

Here is AI on judgment vs judgement:

The words "judgment" and "judgement" are essentially the same, referring to the ability to make considered decisions or the outcome of a decision, particularly in legal contexts. The difference lies primarily in spelling, with "judgment" being the preferred spelling in American English and "judgement" being more common in British English.

Ah, of course you’re long time divorced. No surprise here.

Well I remarried 2 years after my divorce and we just celebrated our 30th anniversary. And we have a 26 yo daughter. Not sure of your point?

Lady, you have quite an abrasive personality turning into grammar police in the age of typing on the phone. People have different language and cultural backgrounds, if you think knowing the American spelling of judgement (lol) and doing a quick google search make you superior in some way or you need to point that out, you’re pathetic and cringe.

Being past 60 you’re in no position to give teens and young adults any dating and sex advice. Likely your daughter is just tuning you out and puts up with your insufferable droning about how the young generation is corrupted.

What?? I was just calling out the person who corrected someone using "judgment" and implying it was spelled "judgement". When in fact in the US, "judgment" is the preferred spelling.

So now *I'm* the grammar police? I was correcting the grammar police who were trying to correct someone else and were ignorant to the correct spelling.

You must have been the American who wrongly thought judgement was correct.

I can give 45-55 year old mothers advice who have 15 yo kids. I'm only a few short years past that.

My daughter doesn't tune me out. She lives in her own apartment and does whatever she wants. Calls a few times a week to catch up, as she's in her first independent job. My advice when she became sexually active - get on birth control!!

And my advice to moms of teen girls - don't allow closed doors at all!

Good grief...

What a shocker, the 65 year old lady is full of righteous indignation from two young adults wanting to close the door and have some privacy because “respect my authoritah”.

How’s that conversation is even going to be like? Larla, I don’t want you to have sex in my house, that’s disrespectful and when the bf comes over you need to leave the door open so everyone can check no shenanigans are taking place. Then you’ll run down the hallway to make sure his hand is not under her blouse.

Don’t you have something better to do? It’s always shriveled post menopausal women with zero interest in sex that are most freaked out about young people having fun.

Oh, you're so far off the mark on me, but so what.

More than half the posters here agree with me to have a doors open policy with teenagers.

I personally don't care once they are over 18. We have done vacation rentals when my son was in college and brought his girlfriend and we gave them their own room. If my daughter visited us now and brought a boyfriend, I wouldn't care if they want to sleep (and do whatever!) in her room.

But I didn't allow my teens in HS to have visitors in their bedroom with the door closed. If other parents think it's fine, I'm ok with them having house rules as they see fit.

But I don't think my opinion is unusual or warrants such hostile insults!

This exactly. It amazes me how some people on here get so offended by the mere idea that parents actually want to set some boundaries for their household and children. And no, High School kids are not adults!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DD is 18 and will be a senior this fall. She’s had the same boy best friend since sophomore year. They’ve always been completely platonic.

In the past I’ve let this boy hang out in DD’s bedroom, even with the door closed. It’s never been a problem.

The boy has been out of town for the summer but they keep in touch through calls and texting. Lately ive had an inkling that they might be developing feelings for each other. I wouldn’t be surprised if they start dating when he returns this fall.

If they start dating I definitely don’t want him in DD’s bedroom, but I don’t know exactly how to present this to her. I don’t feel comfortable telling her that I think she might start dating her friend. I don’t want to push her in that direction. How should I proceed?

You make it simple: please leave the door open when friends come over.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD is 18 and will be a senior this fall. She’s had the same boy best friend since sophomore year. They’ve always been completely platonic.

In the past I’ve let this boy hang out in DD’s bedroom, even with the door closed. It’s never been a problem.

The boy has been out of town for the summer but they keep in touch through calls and texting. Lately ive had an inkling that they might be developing feelings for each other. I wouldn’t be surprised if they start dating when he returns this fall.

If they start dating I definitely don’t want him in DD’s bedroom, but I don’t know exactly how to present this to her. I don’t feel comfortable telling her that I think she might start dating her friend. I don’t want to push her in that direction. How should I proceed?

If they’re going to boink, they’re going to boink. It matters little whether or not they are allowed by you to use her room.

Yes, they will figure out a way to do it if they want to but why encourage it and make it easier for them? Allowing them to hang out in a closed bedroom screams, "Go for it, kids. Bonk away!"

Not really, it says that you did your job asa a parent to educate the child and trust her judgement.

Maybe they want some privacy to have a personal conversation.

18 YOs do not have good “judgment.” I don’t care how well they are raised.

Your “judgement” is not that great either.

I spent 75K on my divorce 30 years ago, and my one free takeaway, was that judgment is spelled "judgment".

I don't know if you are trying to do a gotcha on the spelling, but if you are in the US, I think you just "failed".

Here is AI on judgment vs judgement:

The words "judgment" and "judgement" are essentially the same, referring to the ability to make considered decisions or the outcome of a decision, particularly in legal contexts. The difference lies primarily in spelling, with "judgment" being the preferred spelling in American English and "judgement" being more common in British English.

Ah, of course you’re long time divorced. No surprise here.

Well I remarried 2 years after my divorce and we just celebrated our 30th anniversary. And we have a 26 yo daughter. Not sure of your point?

Lady, you have quite an abrasive personality turning into grammar police in the age of typing on the phone. People have different language and cultural backgrounds, if you think knowing the American spelling of judgement (lol) and doing a quick google search make you superior in some way or you need to point that out, you’re pathetic and cringe.

Being past 60 you’re in no position to give teens and young adults any dating and sex advice. Likely your daughter is just tuning you out and puts up with your insufferable droning about how the young generation is corrupted.

What?? I was just calling out the person who corrected someone using "judgment" and implying it was spelled "judgement". When in fact in the US, "judgment" is the preferred spelling.

So now *I'm* the grammar police? I was correcting the grammar police who were trying to correct someone else and were ignorant to the correct spelling.

You must have been the American who wrongly thought judgement was correct.

I can give 45-55 year old mothers advice who have 15 yo kids. I'm only a few short years past that.

My daughter doesn't tune me out. She lives in her own apartment and does whatever she wants. Calls a few times a week to catch up, as she's in her first independent job. My advice when she became sexually active - get on birth control!!

And my advice to moms of teen girls - don't allow closed doors at all!

Good grief...

What a shocker, the 65 year old lady is full of righteous indignation from two young adults wanting to close the door and have some privacy because “respect my authoritah”.

How’s that conversation is even going to be like? Larla, I don’t want you to have sex in my house, that’s disrespectful and when the bf comes over you need to leave the door open so everyone can check no shenanigans are taking place. Then you’ll run down the hallway to make sure his hand is not under her blouse.

Don’t you have something better to do? It’s always shriveled post menopausal women with zero interest in sex that are most freaked out about young people having fun.

Oh, you're so far off the mark on me, but so what.

More than half the posters here agree with me to have a doors open policy with teenagers.

I personally don't care once they are over 18. We have done vacation rentals when my son was in college and brought his girlfriend and we gave them their own room. If my daughter visited us now and brought a boyfriend, I wouldn't care if they want to sleep (and do whatever!) in her room.

But I didn't allow my teens in HS to have visitors in their bedroom with the door closed. If other parents think it's fine, I'm ok with them having house rules as they see fit.

But I don't think my opinion is unusual or warrants such hostile insults!

This exactly. It amazes me how some people on here get so offended by the mere idea that parents actually want to set some boundaries for their household and children. And no, High School kids are not adults!

Exactly.