If you grew up poor…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But you are not now, what are some things you do that you know are directly related to how you grew up?

We fly direct even if more expensive. I remember a family vacation where we flew to Florida and I swear we changed planes 3 times and landed somewhere else in the state and drove 2 hours because it was cheaper that way.


This is not poor. Poor people never ever fly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But you are not now, what are some things you do that you know are directly related to how you grew up?

We fly direct even if more expensive. I remember a family vacation where we flew to Florida and I swear we changed planes 3 times and landed somewhere else in the state and drove 2 hours because it was cheaper that way.

This is not poor. Poor people never ever fly.

PP flies direct *now*. Not back then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm trying to change this habit, but I'm kind of the opposite with clothing. I change out of my "good" work clothes right when I get home. I too often wear junky clothing because I don't want to ruin anything since when I was small I'd have to wear it no matter if it was stained or had a small hole.

Shoes, 100 percent I get better quality shoes. Don't care about name brand, but after messing up my feet with poor quality shoes, I can't do that anymore. But I would like to step it up here, since my instinct is to go for sturdy and I don't look quite right in some professional environments.

In general spending money on myself is hard. And throwing things away is very hard as well since it feels like I could be poor again so easily.

I'm more like this than OP> I love my old clothes. I also married into an old landed New England family where that's ok and appreciated. Now, my work clothes are another thing. Expensive and classic and I take care of them.

[Anonymous]

Husband is pretty adamant about taking at least two vacations a year because his family never did them.

He also really likes to eat out on the weekend, especially Saturdays. He got a job as soon as he was able to working in grocery stores and Walmart (put himself through college thanks to Walmart) and said he always promised himself one day he’d be the one eating out, not working, on the weekends.

He can’t really eat potato soup, even if it’s fancy, because it reminds him of the potato soup his mom made- water, potatoes, a splash of milk and some salt and pepper.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But you are not now, what are some things you do that you know are directly related to how you grew up?

We fly direct even if more expensive. I remember a family vacation where we flew to Florida and I swear we changed planes 3 times and landed somewhere else in the state and drove 2 hours because it was cheaper that way.

This is not poor. Poor people never ever fly.

PP flies direct *now*. Not back then.

NP. The fact there was any flying does indeed mean they weren't poor. --first plane ride at late 20's

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We were poor for the first 10 years of my life, but those years had an affect on me for sure. I'm constantly fighting intrusive thoughts that we're one paycheck away from living under a bridge - could not be further from the truth but I still can't shake the notion. I hoard takeout napkins and condiments. I re-use foil when possible. I turn my ketchup bottles upside down to get the last drop.

I hate that I have such an unhealthy relationship with money.

DH made fun of me for halving our napkins. I found it to be such a waste that we would wipe our mouths once, and throw them out.

I also have a big tupperware full of takeout ketchup packets.

I cut them in 1/2 too and use 1 a day not 1 per meal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We were poor for the first 10 years of my life, but those years had an affect on me for sure. I'm constantly fighting intrusive thoughts that we're one paycheck away from living under a bridge - could not be further from the truth but I still can't shake the notion. I hoard takeout napkins and condiments. I re-use foil when possible. I turn my ketchup bottles upside down to get the last drop.

I hate that I have such an unhealthy relationship with money.

DH made fun of me for halving our napkins. I found it to be such a waste that we would wipe our mouths once, and throw them out.

I also have a big tupperware full of takeout ketchup packets.

I cut them in 1/2 too and use 1 a day not 1 per meal.

you win

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We grew up poor. We’re not rich now but not poor. I still only order water in a restaurant and I get a lot of clothes from the thrift store for myself annd my kid even though I can afford new, I can’t justify it.

Where I spend now is on my kid. I missed out on activities as a child because of money and I knew I couldn’t ask. I never want my kid to feel like that so if she wants to do a sport or go somewhere I make it happen.

+1 I could’ve written this post.

My parents were children during the Depression/WW2 era and we had little when I was growing up. Canned foods were somewhat of an exception because both had literally gone to bed hungry (more than a few times). I still have a bit of a hoarder/prepper mentality with food/staples. Came in handy during COVID!

Love my “old” clothes, though, still shop in thrift/second hand stores (I figure someone else liked it enough, too, to buy it the first time!).

DH likewise grew up on the very wrong side of town and has clawed his way to having helped create this very nice life we have.

Kids are “spoiled” with our time and, perhaps, a few too many activities but I’m ok with that. Stuff? Not so much.

And, shhhh, I also still have my nail clippers from high school way too many decades ago. I’d be crushed if I lost or broke them. “Trim” brand. Love ‘em!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But you are not now, what are some things you do that you know are directly related to how you grew up?

We fly direct even if more expensive. I remember a family vacation where we flew to Florida and I swear we changed planes 3 times and landed somewhere else in the state and drove 2 hours because it was cheaper that way.


This is not poor. Poor people never ever fly.

Yeah, that’s your parents just being cheap. Poor people do not fly.

[Anonymous]

Good shoes
Appropriate eyeglasses
Appropriate orthodontia

[Anonymous]

I was actually thinking about this last night.

When I was growing up poor, we had old threadbare sheets and no top sheets. Our blankets were quilts used to wrap furniture that my father brought home from work. Our towels were packed in cheap laundry detergent as an incentive to buy the cheap detergent.

I now have the best sheets, towels, and blankets, even for my kids and in the guest room. My husband doesn't understand even though he also grew up poor.

We bought all bread and related products from the day old bread store that always had a hint of mold. I rarely throw away food, but if I smell mold on bread, it immediately goes out the window for birds or other critters.

We couldn't afford sanitary napkins, so I wore bundled up rags that had to be washed by hand in cold water to get out the blood. When I joined the Navy, the best thing was real Kotex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:But you are not now, what are some things you do that you know are directly related to how you grew up?

Me: 1.if clothes have any holes or stains they go right in the trash or get used for cleaning rags. I had to wear clothes until they quite literally fell apart as a child and now have an aversion to the thought of wearing clothes in disrepair.
2. Consistently working through “worst case scenario” for every financial situation even if it’s hypothetical. Worst case scenario was often a reality growing up and honestly it’s just how my brain is wired now.
3. Buying store brand of most things. We rarely got name brand groceries/cleaning supplies etc…growing up but with experience I have learned that there is only a difference in quality in few items-mostly still buy store brand even though can afford to not.
4. Making sure my kids have actual brand name shoes. It’s seems so stupid but growing up I ALWAYS had Payless/k mart/walk at shoes and kids know. They just know. Did not having name brand shoes growing up make me a better person? No it didn’t-it just made me have to deal with teasing from other kids on the regular about my cheap shoes.
5. Still have a taste for cheap foods I grew up with. Rice/beans, grilled cheese etc…and eat them pretty regularly.

1&4 seem in direct conflict with 3&5.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was actually thinking about this last night.

When I was growing up poor, we had old threadbare sheets and no top sheets. Our blankets were quilts used to wrap furniture that my father brought home from work. Our towels were packed in cheap laundry detergent as an incentive to buy the cheap detergent.

I now have the best sheets, towels, and blankets, even for my kids and in the guest room. My husband doesn't understand even though he also grew up poor.

We bought all bread and related products from the day old bread store that always had a hint of mold. I rarely throw away food, but if I smell mold on bread, it immediately goes out the window for birds or other critters.

We couldn't afford sanitary napkins, so I wore bundled up rags that had to be washed by hand in cold water to get out the blood. When I joined the Navy, the best thing was real Kotex.

DCUM can be toxic sometimes but there was a thread a couple of years ago similar to this one and a poster mentioned not having access to Kotex. It really opened my eyes and I’ve been donating Kotex to various organizations ever since. I’m so glad you’re doing well!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But you are not now, what are some things you do that you know are directly related to how you grew up?

Me: 1.if clothes have any holes or stains they go right in the trash or get used for cleaning rags. I had to wear clothes until they quite literally fell apart as a child and now have an aversion to the thought of wearing clothes in disrepair.
2. Consistently working through “worst case scenario” for every financial situation even if it’s hypothetical. Worst case scenario was often a reality growing up and honestly it’s just how my brain is wired now.
3. Buying store brand of most things. We rarely got name brand groceries/cleaning supplies etc…growing up but with experience I have learned that there is only a difference in quality in few items-mostly still buy store brand even though can afford to not.
4. Making sure my kids have actual brand name shoes. It’s seems so stupid but growing up I ALWAYS had Payless/k mart/walk at shoes and kids know. They just know. Did not having name brand shoes growing up make me a better person? No it didn’t-it just made me have to deal with teasing from other kids on the regular about my cheap shoes.
5. Still have a taste for cheap foods I grew up with. Rice/beans, grilled cheese etc…and eat them pretty regularly.

1&4 seem in direct conflict with 3&5.

How so? Food/cleaning supplies are not the same as clothes that other people see.

[Anonymous]

My kids always have snow pants and snow boots. Every year, every size. Good ones.