My house is on fire

[Anonymous]

It is so funny that you immediately blame your mother in law since you know she is a Democrat, but you don't even mention all the fires which took place during the Bush administration. This fire was probably burning for years, but you just notice it more now.

Let me ask you this: do you think your house would be LESS on fire had Sarah Palin been housesitting?

[Anonymous]

If your name is Levi and your MIL-to-be is Sarah, there's a good chance she actually does want to burn your house down.

[Anonymous]

It is God's wrath because yes, you didn't breastfeed long enough (so what if you got a staph infection-suck it up!) , you didn't send your child to the right preschool, so she didn't get into the right private school. Oh and because of all that and the fact she is the only child in the area with below a 99.9%ile IQ she is destined to have a life of firesetting. But at least she's female and couldn't go to Landon.

[Anonymous]

You really shouldn't blame your MIL for the fire, if those contractor guys hadn't taken a huge dump in your toilet, she wouldn't have had to light a match to clear the stench.

[Anonymous]

Yeah, you mean the dump that she BLAMED on the contractor guys... I never bought that one.

[Anonymous]

Its because you circumcised. Blame the mohel.

HTH!

[Anonymous]

OP, I totally know how you are feeling. Your house is on fire, you're hot, you're scared of the flames reaching you, you want to race out of the house...

Listen, I am not trying to discourage you from leaving the house if you feel like you absolutely can't take it anymore. I just wanted you to know there are resources out there for new moms whose houses are burning down, and they were really so helpful for me when my first house was burning. Someone can come over and help you learn how to manage the flames, the smoke, the cinders flying in your eyes (believe me, I've been there! ) and they can even help you build up your body's ability to handle the pain (like, by running out of the house, but then coming back in after you've caught your breath, etc).

Anyway, if you can manage to stay in the house at least until it's been burning 3 months, even, you will have helped your family build up so much scar tissue that will help them later on. I totally think it's worth it, but of course, you're not a bad mom if you decide to just run out of the house.

Good luck!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yeah, you mean the dump that she BLAMED on the contractor guys... I never bought that one.

Did your MIL start the recent thread about constipation? Because that would be a smoking gun, so to speak.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I totally know how you are feeling. Your house is on fire, you're hot, you're scared of the flames reaching you, you want to race out of the house...

Listen, I am not trying to discourage you from leaving the house if you feel like you absolutely can't take it anymore. I just wanted you to know there are resources out there for new moms whose houses are burning down, and they were really so helpful for me when my first house was burning. Someone can come over and help you learn how to manage the flames, the smoke, the cinders flying in your eyes (believe me, I've been there! ) and they can even help you build up your body's ability to handle the pain (like, by running out of the house, but then coming back in after you've caught your breath, etc).

Anyway, if you can manage to stay in the house at least until it's been burning 3 months, even, you will have helped your family build up so much scar tissue that will help them later on. I totally think it's worth it, but of course, you're not a bad mom if you decide to just run out of the house.

Good luck!!!

This post would have been spot on if you had remembered that her MIL's generation did not realize the benefits of house fires and probably never started one in the first place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I totally know how you are feeling. Your house is on fire, you're hot, you're scared of the flames reaching you, you want to race out of the house...

Listen, I am not trying to discourage you from leaving the house if you feel like you absolutely can't take it anymore. I just wanted you to know there are resources out there for new moms whose houses are burning down, and they were really so helpful for me when my first house was burning. Someone can come over and help you learn how to manage the flames, the smoke, the cinders flying in your eyes (believe me, I've been there! ) and they can even help you build up your body's ability to handle the pain (like, by running out of the house, but then coming back in after you've caught your breath, etc).

Anyway, if you can manage to stay in the house at least until it's been burning 3 months, even, you will have helped your family build up so much scar tissue that will help them later on. I totally think it's worth it, but of course, you're not a bad mom if you decide to just run out of the house.

Good luck!!!

This might be one of the best posts I've read on DCUM.

[Anonymous]

In typicaly DCUM fashion, you're totally blowing this out of proportion. The house isn't on fire. The kitchen is hot and you obviously can't stand the heat. But, you don't want to take responsibility for making it that way so you blame your MIL - also typical DCUM. You need therapy.

[Anonymous]

OP, I think you'd get more helpful answers if you could take the time to phrase your question more clearly. Is it truly the fire you're concerned about? Your relationship with your MIL? Could you prioritize? I find DCUM to be incredibly helpful and the posters to be very supportive IF I take the time to really write clearly so there is no confusion about what I'm really asking for. Please try again.

[Anonymous]

OP, I have taken the time to find out what are the top three ranked reasons for houses catching on fire, which I'll post. I realize that people do not like to see these things ranked, that these reasons may not "fit" your fire, but frankly, let's get a grip on reality. You cannot possibly say that a MIL starting a fire is even in the SAME LEAGUE as these other reasons.

1. Smoking (that actually includes three apparatus: cigars, cigarettes, and pipes...but everyone just refers to them as "Smoking")
2. Cooking
3. Heating

I'm sure MIL is a perfectly good way to set a fire, but most recognized fire experts (and there are experts, whether people want to believe it or not) would not put MIL on the same plane as the Big 3 reasons.

[Anonymous]

11:24, why do you have to perpetuate the myth, and yes it's a myth, that there are only three reasons for starting a fire?

You don't even mention electrical shortages, for example. Yet it would be unfair to underestimate the roll of sparks. So really, we need to talk about a "big 5" or a "big 10" list of fire causes.

And frankly, I'm not sure if you were causing the fire for your MIL. Quite possibly you caused the fire yourself because of your own desire to be at the center of attention. We all know about the prestige associated with having a fire in your house, big firetrucks driving up, and other things to cause your neighbors to talk about you and envy you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:11:24, why do you have to perpetuate the myth, and yes it's a myth, that there are only three reasons for starting a fire?

You don't even mention electrical shortages, for example. Yet it would be unfair to underestimate the roll of sparks. So really, we need to talk about a "big 5" or a "big 10" list of fire causes.

And frankly, I'm not sure if you were causing the fire for your MIL. Quite possibly you caused the fire yourself because of your own desire to be at the center of attention. We all know about the prestige associated with having a fire in your house, big firetrucks driving up, and other things to cause your neighbors to talk about you and envy you.

If you read my post carefully, which you obviously didn't, I never said that there were only three reasons. I said these were the TOP reasons.

And by the way, some of us actually don't like all the attention of a house fire caused by smoking (Yes, I WILL mention how my house fire was started, even if you think I'm showing off). You just keep rubbing your two little sticks together and hope for the best. Yeah, right.