Is is ok for a kid to not date (or interact with) the opposite sex until college?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why wouldn’t it be? Such an odd question. Plenty of girls in co-ed schools don’t date until college too.

Except they've had plenty of interactions with boys before college.

[Anonymous]

Think back to the Kavanaugh hearings and the description of how the teen boys at Georgetown Prep treated the girls they interacted with. Girls who don't know how to handle themselves around little predators are at risk.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn’t want to send a daughter, who has zero experience interacting with males, away to college to figure it out on her own. I think, as women, we rely on our experience to judge new situations and to judge men and figure out how to hone in on the ones we want in our lives and how to deal with the ones we don’t want around us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Think back to the Kavanaugh hearings and the description of how the teen boys at Georgetown Prep treated the girls they interacted with. Girls who don't know how to handle themselves around little predators are at risk.

This is an awful thing to say, "how to handle themselves" ? Girls from any background or with any amount of experience can get taken advantage of.
Anyway, I went to an all girls school, was a late bloomer, and had some interaction with boys on a club swim team but not much. Very few of my classmates had zero interaction with boys outside of school because most of us did outside extracurriculars but few in my circle were dating.
I was awkward with boys my first year of college but if anything I was overly cautious, not at all reckless. Obviously this will vary person to person. I figured it out by sophomore year and had a great experience socially. Met my husband shortly after college and am happily married.

FWIW, I only have sons now and I wouldn't be keen on sending them to an all boys school but if I had a daughter I would have no reservations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Think back to the Kavanaugh hearings and the description of how the teen boys at Georgetown Prep treated the girls they interacted with. Girls who don't know how to handle themselves around little predators are at risk.

This is an awful thing to say, "how to handle themselves" ? Girls from any background or with any amount of experience can get taken advantage of.
Anyway, I went to an all girls school, was a late bloomer, and had some interaction with boys on a club swim team but not much. Very few of my classmates had zero interaction with boys outside of school because most of us did outside extracurriculars but few in my circle were dating.
I was awkward with boys my first year of college but if anything I was overly cautious, not at all reckless. Obviously this will vary person to person. I figured it out by sophomore year and had a great experience socially. Met my husband shortly after college and am happily married.

FWIW, I only have sons now and I wouldn't be keen on sending them to an all boys school but if I had a daughter I would have no reservations.

That's true, but girls who are used to boys are much better at dealing with boys.

[Anonymous]

I think that the OP is a troll. All of the all-girls schools in the DMV have lots of events with brother schools. And since most of the girls at the all-girls schools also have brothers, most of the girls have had experiences with boys outside of school when they are at each others' houses. Additionally, for events like Homecoming and Prom or Fall/Winter/Spring balls, the kids set each other up on dates. Even the most shy girls or boys attend with a date of the opposite sex. So the OP's post seems off, especially if she is trying to portray it as her daughter being at a school in the DMV.

[Anonymous]

Okay to not date - definitely not okay to not interact

She could be gay too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I went to an all girls high school and a women's college and managed to turn out a-ok.

That wasn't the questions. Did you never interact with any men those entire 8 years?

[Anonymous]

OP I have a different thought process.

What have you taught her about sex ed? Her body? How to treat a partner?

How about birth control?

[Anonymous]

Yes, it's fine to not date. Many kids don't. Let them interact in a neutral way. Don't they put on plays and have dances, SSL hour projects etc with all-boys schools?

[Anonymous]

"I think that the OP is a troll. All of the all-girls schools in the DMV have lots of events with brother schools. And since most of the girls at the all-girls schools also have brothers, most of the girls have had experiences with boys outside of school when they are at each others' houses. Additionally, for events like Homecoming and Prom or Fall/Winter/Spring balls, the kids set each other up on dates. Even the most shy girls or boys attend with a date of the opposite sex. So the OP's post seems off, especially if she is trying to portray it as her daughter being at a school in the DMV."

Like PP, I couldn't believe that this would be a real situation. But I can now vouch for this being how it is for an 18-yr-old boy I know at my local all boy Catholic school. We tried to set him up with a prom date (I even found a cute girl who agreed to go with him) but he was too uncomfortable about the whole thing and called it off. At first he was excited about going to prom with a fixed up date but I guess that once he thought about it, he felt overwhelmed. I specifically tried brainstorming ideas with him for girls he could invite and he literally did not have any female friends in real life or online.

Not sure what he'll do this year when it's his senior prom, but from what I can tell he still hasn't made any female friends who might blossom into potential prom dates. At DC's high school kids go to proms without dates, but they are not a single sex school so there are plenty of classmates to group dance with. I seriously doubt that a dozen teen boys will dance together without any girls around at a Catholic school event. And if you're a guy who brought a date, she probably won't want to be passed around and shared with your buddies who didn't bring a date. I know I wouldn't appreciate that.

[Anonymous]

Our kids have been through so much. Lay off, OP. Her upbringing is so vastly different from yours. There is virtually no comparison between the two.

Let her go at her pace in these strange times that we adults have paved for her. It is OUR fault that things are things are this wierd, this dangerous, this unpredictable.

Build your daughter up instead of tearing her down. You need to be in her corner. No one else is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went to an all girls high school and a women's college and managed to turn out a-ok.

That wasn't the questions. Did you never interact with any men those entire 8 years?

And why is this a problem?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"I think that the OP is a troll. All of the all-girls schools in the DMV have lots of events with brother schools. And since most of the girls at the all-girls schools also have brothers, most of the girls have had experiences with boys outside of school when they are at each others' houses. Additionally, for events like Homecoming and Prom or Fall/Winter/Spring balls, the kids set each other up on dates. Even the most shy girls or boys attend with a date of the opposite sex. So the OP's post seems off, especially if she is trying to portray it as her daughter being at a school in the DMV."

Like PP, I couldn't believe that this would be a real situation. But I can now vouch for this being how it is for an 18-yr-old boy I know at my local all boy Catholic school. We tried to set him up with a prom date (I even found a cute girl who agreed to go with him) but he was too uncomfortable about the whole thing and called it off. At first he was excited about going to prom with a fixed up date but I guess that once he thought about it, he felt overwhelmed. I specifically tried brainstorming ideas with him for girls he could invite and he literally did not have any female friends in real life or online.

Not sure what he'll do this year when it's his senior prom, but from what I can tell he still hasn't made any female friends who might blossom into potential prom dates. At DC's high school kids go to proms without dates, but they are not a single sex school so there are plenty of classmates to group dance with. I seriously doubt that a dozen teen boys will dance together without any girls around at a Catholic school event. And if you're a guy who brought a date, she probably won't want to be passed around and shared with your buddies who didn't bring a date. I know I wouldn't appreciate that.

??? It is a prom date, they aren't getting married. At our kids' schools, sometimes kids who are set up don't even meet until the pre-party. Maybe they will talk ahead of time or try to see each other before hand, but usually not. That's fine and expected in this area. The kids don't need to know each others' life stories. They just need enough information so they can get the right color/type corsage or boutonnière. Most of the kids are meeting in groups at pre-parties at someone's house or at a country club or something. Then they travel together in a bus or a bunch of limos to the actual event, and the same for the return. They usually go to after-parties at someone's house and then either get picked up there or do a sleepover at someone's house.

I agree that I don't think that the OP is talking about this area. I also think the whole tone of her post is off so I agree that she may be a troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went to an all girls high school and a women's college and managed to turn out a-ok.

That wasn't the questions. Did you never interact with any men those entire 8 years?

And why is this a problem?

Because you didn’t answer her f’ing question LOL