I hate the comments my husband makes about what I eat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve mentioned it before how his comments come across as rude and unhelpful. Im 5’2, 130lbs. Im not overweight or trying to change my body, I know im not at an ideal weight for my size but im healthy that that’s the most important thing to me.

He constantly makes side commentary about what I eat. I had put a second tablespoon of parmesan and he snorted/laughed when I did this. I asked him what the problem was and he commented about how I must "really like parmesan." I asked him what the problem is and he said nothing.

I was eating wheat crackers earlier today about an hour before dinner and grabbed one more cracker from the bag, he said "are you sure you’re going to be hungry for dinner later?" I asked him why it’s his concern if/when I eat crackers and he went "oh god THIS again", like how dare I have the audacity to be offended by what be said.

I cook and do all the grocery shopping in our household. We eat healthy and have indulgences once in a while. He has some weird hangups about his own body.

Honestly I’m just sick of him and his snide commentary - if it’s not what I’m eating it’s what I’m buying or doing. He always has some kind of unkind comment.

Textbook VBA.

Seriously, what is VBA???

what is VBA?

Veiled brag alert.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The first example with the cheese doesn't sound bad. You honestly just seem sensitive.

I don't agree at all, this would drive me nuts

I would probably react by eating spoonfuls of parmesan straight out the container. Not saying it's good, but that's how I react to criticism about my eating

[Anonymous]

Run. My Dad is like this. He has major eating disorders and is a control freak. He calls his wife (he is visiting us) in Miami 4 times a day so that she can report what she eats and drinks, what and how much exercise she has done. Then, he goes through my pantry and fridge and throws out anything with sugar or that he feels is processed. He makes veggie juices and forces my kids to eat what he makes them. He calls my youngest fat and praises my thin teen and instructs her to stay that way. Then, it is my turn. He kinda goes easy on me now as I have a lot of serious health issues and have always been on specialized diets. Growing up was pure hell. I suffered with very bad eating disorders, body dysmorphia, and very low self-esteem. Living through my chronic illness, depression, etc has helped me realize my strength. I am now proud of my body and what it can do. But, man, do not let this man start with you. He will never change!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Run. My Dad is like this. He has major eating disorders and is a control freak. He calls his wife (he is visiting us) in Miami 4 times a day so that she can report what she eats and drinks, what and how much exercise she has done. Then, he goes through my pantry and fridge and throws out anything with sugar or that he feels is processed. He makes veggie juices and forces my kids to eat what he makes them. He calls my youngest fat and praises my thin teen and instructs her to stay that way. Then, it is my turn. He kinda goes easy on me now as I have a lot of serious health issues and have always been on specialized diets. Growing up was pure hell. I suffered with very bad eating disorders, body dysmorphia, and very low self-esteem. Living through my chronic illness, depression, etc has helped me realize my strength. I am now proud of my body and what it can do. But, man, do not let this man start with you. He will never change!!!

Why do you still invite him over?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve mentioned it before how his comments come across as rude and unhelpful. Im 5’2, 130lbs. Im not overweight or trying to change my body, I know im not at an ideal weight for my size but im healthy that that’s the most important thing to me.

He constantly makes side commentary about what I eat. I had put a second tablespoon of parmesan and he snorted/laughed when I did this. I asked him what the problem was and he commented about how I must "really like parmesan." I asked him what the problem is and he said nothing.

I was eating wheat crackers earlier today about an hour before dinner and grabbed one more cracker from the bag, he said "are you sure you’re going to be hungry for dinner later?" I asked him why it’s his concern if/when I eat crackers and he went "oh god THIS again", like how dare I have the audacity to be offended by what be said.

I cook and do all the grocery shopping in our household. We eat healthy and have indulgences once in a while. He has some weird hangups about his own body.

Honestly I’m just sick of him and his snide commentary - if it’s not what I’m eating it’s what I’m buying or doing. He always has some kind of unkind comment.

Textbook VBA.

what is VBA?

Veiled Brag Alert

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Run. My Dad is like this. He has major eating disorders and is a control freak. He calls his wife (he is visiting us) in Miami 4 times a day so that she can report what she eats and drinks, what and how much exercise she has done. Then, he goes through my pantry and fridge and throws out anything with sugar or that he feels is processed. He makes veggie juices and forces my kids to eat what he makes them. He calls my youngest fat and praises my thin teen and instructs her to stay that way. Then, it is my turn. He kinda goes easy on me now as I have a lot of serious health issues and have always been on specialized diets. Growing up was pure hell. I suffered with very bad eating disorders, body dysmorphia, and very low self-esteem. Living through my chronic illness, depression, etc has helped me realize my strength. I am now proud of my body and what it can do. But, man, do not let this man start with you. He will never change!!!

He sounds like my uncle…he constantly talks about how awful his daughter’s “weight problem” is (my cousin…she’s healthy and active and not obese, just very tall and broad shoulders and hips ). He checks trash cans to monitor what everyone is eating in his house.

[Anonymous]

Pp here. Apparently my uncle used to be even worse and once my dad (his brother in law) stormed out during a family dinner and refused to come back

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, if he always is snide and disrespectful, please see a therapist and figure out that you should divorce him. This is no way to live. And it’s not going to get better.

This. OP do NOT have kids with this man. He will not be a loving kind and supportive father. Get into therapy to figure out why you picked him so if you remarry you will pick better. The constant tension around food would be a deal breaker for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He doesnt love you. So base your future decision making from this low point

How can you possibly know this?! You are rude and unhelpful. What is your motive?

[Anonymous]

OP does he just make these mean comments and eye rolls about food, or does he do this of other stuff as well?

My ex once told me my weight gain, l was still in the healthy range btw, was causing him to be depressed. Sooooo many issues with that. If a guy lets his self esteem and mental health be based on looks of his partner not cool. And the cruelty towards me by saying that - it didn’t even register to him. He has very low empathy, there were other issues besides the comments on my weight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He's trying to tell you he's not that into you at your current weight.

Obviously.
That doesn't make it okay though.

[Anonymous]

I would tell him loudly to back off and stop being controlling about what you eat. Tell him that you don't appreciate the comments about eating, that they make you feel bad, and that whatever his intent, the message he is sending is that you should be eating less. And that you want him to stop.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's trying to tell you he's not that into you at your current weight.

Obviously.
That doesn't make it okay though.

DH does the same and I believe it’s because he doesn’t like my weight gain. I think it’s a control issue - If he comments on my food choices and controls what I eat then I’ll be thin. It totally doesn’t work. No one can calorie restrict unless they want to and shaming your partner doesn’t make them want to lose weight. I hate the comments so I eat really healthy around DH, then eat what I want when he’s not around. We just went on vacation and I was starving the whole time. We got home and I ate everything that wasn’t tied down. I’m 5’5” 160lbs and have accepted my weight. I wish DH would just accept me at my weight and let me live around him.

[Anonymous]

I think you're bmi is ok you should show him that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The first example with the cheese doesn't sound bad. You honestly just seem sensitive.

You’re awful, too, then.