Offended over hand-me-downs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can’t think of anyone UMC who wouldn’t be offended by gifting their kids used kid clothes. Just no.

Hi, it’s me. I’m UMC and I wouldn’t be offended—at all. I believe in saving money (especially on kids’ clothes, which are outgrown so fast) and making the environmentally friendlier option that is re-using clothes. That said, I always ask first if people want something and never assume, because if you assume and hand someone something they do not want, you are literally trying to hand them a chore.

[Anonymous]

If you don’t ask me first, no I would not be pleased. If only because my car is often chock-full of things because I work in events and catering, and you never know when my backseat has banners and baskets and bottles of wine and who knows what. ASK and offer, don’t assume and shove things on people.

[Anonymous]

Oh oops, OP is long gone because no one thinks she did the right thing by not asking and simply trying to shove stuff off on SIL.

[Anonymous]

Generous impulse, OP. Your sister could have graciously declined without getting offended, which is a weird reaction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Generous impulse, OP. Your sister could have graciously declined without getting offended, which is a weird reaction.

OP has yet to prove that SIL was actually offended. We have no idea what SIL actually said or did, we just have OP’s assumption/impression.

[Anonymous]

I wasn't offended, but when my sister arrived at my house with several boxes of her kids' hand-me-downs, I almost burst into tears. We were already overwhelmed with baby stuff and most of the clothes were for 3/4 year olds, which meant we just had to store it until it fit. It all sat around our basement until we did a big basement clean-up and donated 99% of it.

[Anonymous]

I honestly don’t see what’s so generous about castoffs. Textiles are stupidly cheap and any org that collects used clothing is completely overwhelmed. They ship donated clothes to India, and now it’s a common myth that Americans throw their clothes out after one wear because laundry is more expensive here than new clothes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can’t think of anyone UMC who wouldn’t be offended by gifting their kids used kid clothes. Just no.

Hi, it’s me. I’m UMC and I wouldn’t be offended—at all. I believe in saving money (especially on kids’ clothes, which are outgrown so fast) and making the environmentally friendlier option that is re-using clothes. That said, I always ask first if people want something and never assume, because if you assume and hand someone something they do not want, you are literally trying to hand them a chore.

Hi friend. My umc kids wore tons of cousin hand me downs. Why not?? Great for the planet!

[Anonymous]

The aholes are out in force on this thread.

[Anonymous]

What did she say or do to indicate she was offended?

Was she flustered rather than offended at the thought of dealing with a huge box of stuff? Some people are really overwhelmed and flustered at the thought of dealing with more stuff.

[Anonymous]

You shouldn’t have packed the box up before asking first, that was a bit presumptuous. That being said, I love hand me downs! I would have been thrilled although maybe wouldn’t have chosen to use every outfit.

[Anonymous]

It's weird that she was offended but that's on her. Move on and don't offer her anything ever again. Someone else will gladly take them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The aholes are out in force on this thread.

Nah. Just you so far.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's weird that she was offended but that's on her. Move on and don't offer her anything ever again. Someone else will gladly take them.

I’m starting to doubt SIL was offended.
OP assumed that much as she assumed someone would want her random crap just because it was J. Crew, Nordstrom, and Janie and whatever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The aholes are out in force on this thread.

Is that you, OP?

Just donate to Goodwill, no need to schlep a box to a cookout.