18 yo son spent the night at a date's apartment

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Make sure he knows that Roe has been struck down and that he needs to use a condom every single time.

THIS. Y'all need to teach your boys that they are also responsible for birth control. Pill + Condom EVERY SINGLE TIME.

100% I said as much to my boys today. Your life will be over as you know it. Hopefully that gets them to the polls.

Yep, don’t let him get trapped.

[Anonymous]

Why are you upset, did you get a gate pass to get him on a flight a few months ago or something?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Make sure he knows that Roe has been struck down and that he needs to use a condom every single time.

THIS. Y'all need to teach your boys that they are also responsible for birth control. Pill + Condom EVERY SINGLE TIME.

100% I said as much to my boys today. Your life will be over as you know it. Hopefully that gets them to the polls.

Fascinating to me that apparently none of you know it was ALREADY TRUE before today that if he knocked her up he’d be on the hook for child support and you should ALREADY have been telling him to use contraception. Was it your plan before today to tell him he doesn’t have to worry about contraception because she could get an abortion? Really? What was the plan if she didn’t?

Not to mention, abortion remains legal in VA and MD so nothing has changed with Roe being struck down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

He told you his plans and since he is an adult, you don't really get much of a say about this. I'd be happy he let me know where he was.

I disagree. If my kid (of any age) is living rent-free in my house and eating my food, etc., I am totally entitled to make some rules surrounding that. At my house, they have to be home by a certain time because my house, my rules. FWIW, I have four kids in their twenties and none of them has ever complained about this. Of course, there were nights they slept at friends’ houses, but they always showed enough respect to let us know what was going on.

As far as you know. LOL.

This is a great way to get your kid to lie to you.

[Anonymous]

Adoption is a choice.

Not for him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He is 18. He should not have a curfew. Him having sex with his girlfriend is totally normal. There should be no conflict.

The thing is this isn't his girlfriend this was a girl he met at a coffee shop and asked out, this is the first time he's spent any amount of time with her and I'm worried about what this means for his future romantic and sexual health

Then have that conversation with him. He texted to let you know he'd be out all night, and that's great. That's what adults do when they change plans, out of courtesy to the people they live with, so they aren't up worrying.

Talk about the potential consequences of casual sex with people he doesn't know well. I've been preaching this to my son since he was about 11. Whether it sticks or not? No idea. But I keep harping on it. My spiel is no sex until you are 18, and only with someone you really care about. There are too many ways things could go sideways. Do I think he will wait til 18? Nope. But do I hope he will have sex within trusting, caring relationships? I absolutely hope so. And we talk about the ramifications. STIs, pregnancy, and the one that hits home with him the most -- potential accusations of rape -- possibly legit because intoxicated people can't consent to sex. (remind your son that intoxicated people can't consent to sex).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

He told you his plans and since he is an adult, you don't really get much of a say about this. I'd be happy he let me know where he was.

I disagree. If my kid (of any age) is living rent-free in my house and eating my food, etc., I am totally entitled to make some rules surrounding that. At my house, they have to be home by a certain time because my house, my rules. FWIW, I have four kids in their twenties and none of them has ever complained about this. Of course, there were nights they slept at friends’ houses, but they always showed enough respect to let us know what was going on.

Okay. So then why is the OP asking DCUMs what the consequences should be? If these are her rules, she should have thought about the consequences of breaking them. The OP's kid spent the night somewhere else and let her know what he was doing. It sounds like her rules are that her kid can't do that. Now she can figure out how to punish him.

[Anonymous]

Charge him rent. Charge him for the cell phone. He is 18 now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Adoption is a choice.

I know it’s hard to understand, but there are women who are not interested in being incubators for others.

[Anonymous]

Op you should be happy you have an attractive son that is sexually desired.

Would you rather he be an incel?

[Anonymous]

He needs to use the sox
Or he will get monkey pox

[Anonymous]

How old is his girlfriend that she has her own apt and he lives home with you and isn’t in college yet?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:BFD op. Unclench your pearls.

If it was your 18-yr old daughter out getting railed by some dude she just met I bet you wouldn't be such acting like such a jack off right now.

[Anonymous]

Who cares? Stock up on condoms and be happy he’s happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He is 18. He should not have a curfew. Him having sex with his girlfriend is totally normal. There should be no conflict.

The thing is this isn't his girlfriend this was a girl he met at a coffee shop and asked out, this is the first time he's spent any amount of time with her and I'm worried about what this means for his future romantic and sexual health

Riiiiight. He met her on the internet for the mutual purpose of hooking up. Get with it.