Parents please believe your child’s teacher

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My child was having issues so we had an evaluator sit in the classroom.

They evaluator had a list of 5 things for the teacher (not the child, not the parent) to change.

You paid a person to tell you your kid was perfect and it was all the teacher at fault? Got it.

No I paid a person to tell me my child was dyslexic.

When she observed the classroom she made suggestions to the teacher (and principal). The design of the desks, the order of the classes, the use of the board vs lecture, etc.

The teacher wasn’t as defensive as you she used all the suggestions to make her classroom a better environment for learning.

But you fo demonstrate his the teacher can be the problem and simple suggestions to improve are net with hostility.

I’m left wondering how the teacher accommodated all of these suggestions that directly benefit your child while simultaneously supporting all of the other children in the class.

Also, you need to realize how your initial statement sounds to a teacher. Teachers have to take responsibility for everything. They are used to hearing “simple suggestions” from their administrators, from parents, and from anybody else who spends 2 seconds in their classrooms. Often these suggestions contradict.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Teachers need to understand that often parents already know these things and instead of approaching us as “generic parent in denial” consider that it MIGHT be possible we know our kids better than you do.

Of course! But if you already know these things please talk with the teacher about it to problem solve. You can be on the same team, pulling together to support your child.

Happily, but it’s hard to be on the same team if the teacher is approaching it from OP’s perspective. It’s an attitude that will put people in the defensive immediately and actually demonstrates a lot of arrogance. Do you really think a teacher who has spent a few months in a classroom environment with a kid is going to know MORE than the child’s parent? Come on.

I mean, they know more about the child in the school environment than the parents do. YOU “come on.” Good thing my older sister’s teacher spoke up to say she was very withdrawn and checked-out at school after skipping a grade, even though at home she was the oldest/bossy/controlling/always getting her way and very outspoken. When my parents realized that skipping a grade had such a big impact on her socially and academically, they worked with her teacher on strategies to make the adjustment period easier. -NP

Sounds like the teacher in this case approached the parents as authorities on their own kid and your parents respond using all the information at their disposal, including what the teacher shared.

No one said teachers don’t have important insight. OP is positioning herself as the ultimate arbiter of a child’s situation, when she just has a piece of the puzzle. And your story also illustrates something important for teachers to remember— parents are the ones who are going to be dealing with any issues long term. A teacher gets nine months of classroom time. So the teacher’s input, while valuable, is just part of a much larger picture. I’ve had teachers in subsequent years who had very different takes on how best to address issues with my kid (who is not remotely shy generally but has serious social anxiety in school settings only). It’s not that one teacher was wrong and the other right. It’s that they each got a snapshot and offered their best insight on that glimpse of my kid. I’m not going to dismiss it but I’m not always going to do exactly what they say because I’m also incorporating info from other teachers, specialists, and my own observation.

You are all so defensive and “whataboutist” with your responses. There is nothing wrong with what OP originally stated. And then you all pile on and make it into something it wasn’t and make obvious points that don’t need to be overtly stated. Like, duh of course teachers need to listen to parent perspectives, too, and lead with positives where possible, etc. I stand by what I said: there is nothing wrong with that OP posted. Some of you are knee-jerk negative any time a teacher expresses anything on here, honestly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also, severe constipation can look like autism to an untrained eye. Lack of vision correction can present itself as a student with learning difficulties. Teacher – stay in your lane.

Signed, another teacher who is also a parent.

+1, this stuff happens all the time. Turns out teachers are not all-knowing beings.

Well then take the information they are giving you and use it to try to figure out what is really going on. You know, like, BE A PARENT? Do you dismiss and discount any feedback you get from doctors, nurses, coaches, babysitters, and after-care providers, too? Take whatever information the teacher gives you and use it to get the big picture. This is not some great mystery, people. This is basic Parenting 101: use the information you get from the people who come into contact with your kid to get the big picture and get help where needed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My child was having issues so we had an evaluator sit in the classroom.

They evaluator had a list of 5 things for the teacher (not the child, not the parent) to change.

You paid a person to tell you your kid was perfect and it was all the teacher at fault? Got it.

No I paid a person to tell me my child was dyslexic.

When she observed the classroom she made suggestions to the teacher (and principal). The design of the desks, the order of the classes, the use of the board vs lecture, etc.

The teacher wasn’t as defensive as you she used all the suggestions to make her classroom a better environment for learning.

But you fo demonstrate his the teacher can be the problem and simple suggestions to improve are net with hostility.

This is hilarious. So many of those things are out if a teacher’s control. You think a teacher gets to unilaterally pick what order to teach classes. It has to be coordinated with specialists and the school. If the entire school teaches math before recess your observer’s recommendation that the teacher teaches reading first is laughable. The design of of the desks? Often times the leadership is dictating how they want desks arranged. If a teacher want to use rows of desks that wouldn’t be allowed at some schools. The teacher probably was relieved when your child left the class at the end of the year.

[Anonymous]

I found the opposite to be true with my oldest. I wish his teachers were MORE direct. Granted, my kid never had major behavioral issues, but if I had known to get an eval at 5 as opposed to 8.5 (when he began saying he wished he was dead), I think he’d be better off.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My child was having issues so we had an evaluator sit in the classroom.

They evaluator had a list of 5 things for the teacher (not the child, not the parent) to change.

You paid a person to tell you your kid was perfect and it was all the teacher at fault? Got it.

No I paid a person to tell me my child was dyslexic.

When she observed the classroom she made suggestions to the teacher (and principal). The design of the desks, the order of the classes, the use of the board vs lecture, etc.

The teacher wasn’t as defensive as you she used all the suggestions to make her classroom a better environment for learning.

But you fo demonstrate his the teacher can be the problem and simple suggestions to improve are net with hostility.

This is hilarious. So many of those things are out if a teacher’s control. You think a teacher gets to unilaterally pick what order to teach classes. It has to be coordinated with specialists and the school. If the entire school teaches math before recess your observer’s recommendation that the teacher teaches reading first is laughable. The design of of the desks? Often times the leadership is dictating how they want desks arranged. If a teacher want to use rows of desks that wouldn’t be allowed at some schools. The teacher probably was relieved when your child left the class at the end of the year.

Teachers have autonomy to put desks the way they want. That’s not from leadership.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My child was having issues so we had an evaluator sit in the classroom.

They evaluator had a list of 5 things for the teacher (not the child, not the parent) to change.

You paid a person to tell you your kid was perfect and it was all the teacher at fault? Got it.

No I paid a person to tell me my child was dyslexic.

When she observed the classroom she made suggestions to the teacher (and principal). The design of the desks, the order of the classes, the use of the board vs lecture, etc.

The teacher wasn’t as defensive as you she used all the suggestions to make her classroom a better environment for learning.

But you fo demonstrate his the teacher can be the problem and simple suggestions to improve are net with hostility.

This is hilarious. So many of those things are out if a teacher’s control. You think a teacher gets to unilaterally pick what order to teach classes. It has to be coordinated with specialists and the school. If the entire school teaches math before recess your observer’s recommendation that the teacher teaches reading first is laughable. The design of of the desks? Often times the leadership is dictating how they want desks arranged. If a teacher want to use rows of desks that wouldn’t be allowed at some schools. The teacher probably was relieved when your child left the class at the end of the year.

This anecdote really highlights the problem with education. The parent assumes the teacher is the problem and brings in an expert, somebody without teaching experience who is unfamiliar with the operations of an actual classroom. This expert doesn’t know the many conflicting priorities a teacher needs to meet on a daily basis. Would I have an “expert” sit in on a doctor’s appointment with me? No. I assume my doctor has the training and knowledge to be the expert in that environment. Why can’t we give teachers that same respect? I’m a general education teacher who is about to spend my whole summer in supplemental training programs. And for what? To have an “expert” second guess what I do in my classroom?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My child was having issues so we had an evaluator sit in the classroom.

They evaluator had a list of 5 things for the teacher (not the child, not the parent) to change.

You paid a person to tell you your kid was perfect and it was all the teacher at fault? Got it.

No I paid a person to tell me my child was dyslexic.

When she observed the classroom she made suggestions to the teacher (and principal). The design of the desks, the order of the classes, the use of the board vs lecture, etc.

The teacher wasn’t as defensive as you she used all the suggestions to make her classroom a better environment for learning.

But you fo demonstrate his the teacher can be the problem and simple suggestions to improve are net with hostility.

This is hilarious. So many of those things are out if a teacher’s control. You think a teacher gets to unilaterally pick what order to teach classes. It has to be coordinated with specialists and the school. If the entire school teaches math before recess your observer’s recommendation that the teacher teaches reading first is laughable. The design of of the desks? Often times the leadership is dictating how they want desks arranged. If a teacher want to use rows of desks that wouldn’t be allowed at some schools. The teacher probably was relieved when your child left the class at the end of the year.

Again, thanks for continuing to show how rude and defensive teachers mostly are.

Nope, I am friends with the teacher and we see each other often.

The principal was thankful to understand why the class design was causing issues, my son was the only child being evaluated but the evaluator could see many kids having similar issues.

You should not stack academics and cluster specials. The school did that and when they saw why tgat was bad they actually changed the class schedule.

It improved the behavior and learning for all kids and made the teachers life much easier. She was thankful for the feedback.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My child was having issues so we had an evaluator sit in the classroom.

They evaluator had a list of 5 things for the teacher (not the child, not the parent) to change.

This is what I see most often. Too often, classrooms/schools are not set up to be developmentally appropriate and teachers notice "challenging behaviors" that would not exist if kids had adequate outdoor time, movement time, social-emotional learning, etc. Teachers, who spend a few hours a day for 180 days with a child in a group setting, should consider their own practices first before blaming parents or jumping to some diagnosis they aren't qualified to make.


--Former teacher & teacher educator

[Anonymous]

I definitely believe the teacher but I know of a mother of a black boy who got phone calls for behavior, and it turned out his behavior was identical to the behavior of white kids and black girls who did not get phone calls. Yes it was true that he was rocking back and forth on the carpet and looking away while the teacher was talking. It was also true that she was biased against this poor kid. So while I believe the teacher’s facts I won’t always wholesale accept their conclusions

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My child was having issues so we had an evaluator sit in the classroom.

They evaluator had a list of 5 things for the teacher (not the child, not the parent) to change.

You paid a person to tell you your kid was perfect and it was all the teacher at fault? Got it.

No I paid a person to tell me my child was dyslexic.

When she observed the classroom she made suggestions to the teacher (and principal). The design of the desks, the order of the classes, the use of the board vs lecture, etc.

The teacher wasn’t as defensive as you she used all the suggestions to make her classroom a better environment for learning.

But you fo demonstrate his the teacher can be the problem and simple suggestions to improve are net with hostility.

This is hilarious. So many of those things are out if a teacher’s control. You think a teacher gets to unilaterally pick what order to teach classes. It has to be coordinated with specialists and the school. If the entire school teaches math before recess your observer’s recommendation that the teacher teaches reading first is laughable. The design of of the desks? Often times the leadership is dictating how they want desks arranged. If a teacher want to use rows of desks that wouldn’t be allowed at some schools. The teacher probably was relieved when your child left the class at the end of the year.

This anecdote really highlights the problem with education. The parent assumes the teacher is the problem and brings in an expert, somebody without teaching experience who is unfamiliar with the operations of an actual classroom. This expert doesn’t know the many conflicting priorities a teacher needs to meet on a daily basis. Would I have an “expert” sit in on a doctor’s appointment with me? No. I assume my doctor has the training and knowledge to be the expert in that environment. Why can’t we give teachers that same respect? I’m a general education teacher who is about to spend my whole summer in supplemental training programs. And for what? To have an “expert” second guess what I do in my classroom?

This post is hilariously ignorant.

PARENTS! Listen to teachers do something with your problem child!

Okay, I paid $3000 for an evaluation like you suggested which includes evaluation the child in the classroom.

PARENTS! Don’t use experts !

Like WTF! You want parents to take your feedback and get help or not? Sorry the observation found flaws in your teaching but if you have such a low self esteem that you can’t receive feedback maybe you shouldn’t teach.

[Anonymous]

No I paid a person to tell me my child was dyslexic.

When she observed the classroom she made suggestions to the teacher (and principal). The design of the desks, the order of the classes, the use of the board vs lecture, etc.

The teacher wasn’t as defensive as you she used all the suggestions to make her classroom a better environment for learning.

But you fo demonstrate his the teacher can be the problem and simple suggestions to improve are net with hostility.



I’m left wondering how the teacher accommodated all of these suggestions that directly benefit your child while simultaneously supporting all of the other children in the class.

Also, you need to realize how your initial statement sounds to a teacher. Teachers have to take responsibility for everything. They are used to hearing “simple suggestions” from their administrators, from parents, and from anybody else who spends 2 seconds in their classrooms. Often these suggestions contradict.

NP.
I was left wondering why the 1st poster initially described the teacher as in need of 5 suggestions for improvement (connotation: poor teacher) when the teacher, once presented with information specifically about how to help a student with dyslexia, made all the changes requested. This teacher, who probably was never trained in how to help a student with this condition, did everything asked of them by an evaluator whose job it is to know all about dyslexia. Sounds like a pretty good teacher to me.

[Anonymous]

It’s no wonder why teachers are fleeing the classroom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s no wonder why teachers are fleeing the classroom.

Bingo!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s no wonder why teachers are fleeing the classroom.

Was about to say, what a toxic freaking thread for the last day of school. Keep on stinking DCUM