Did a 180 and decided to redshirt my child- question for parents who decided to do the same

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: If I must, I would say our family is not ready for a 7 hour day yet.

Your family isn't going to kindergarten.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So your kid will turn 7 in kindergarten? Yeah I wouldn't celebrate his 7th birthday with his kinder friends. My son who just finished 2nd grade is still 7.

I agree. That is insane. My child will celebrate their 5th birthday in kindergarten. The fact that your 7 year old may be in class with my 5 year old is ridiculous.

My child will turn 7 in second grade, too. You have not done the right thing by him or his classmates, and you know it - hence your extreme self-consciousness, embarrassment about birthday parties, and longwinded, overexplaining posts. You want just want your athletic, academic ready kid to get a TWO YEAR LEG UP on the other kids - not because he needs it, but because you're extra ambitious for him. Go pray on that. I don't think Jesus would approve of abusing the loopholes like this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So your kid will turn 7 in kindergarten? Yeah I wouldn't celebrate his 7th birthday with his kinder friends. My son who just finished 2nd grade is still 7.

I agree. That is insane. My child will celebrate their 5th birthday in kindergarten. The fact that your 7 year old may be in class with my 5 year old is ridiculous.

My child will turn 7 in second grade, too. You have not done the right thing by him or his classmates, and you know it - hence your extreme self-consciousness, embarrassment about birthday parties, and longwinded, overexplaining posts. You want just want your athletic, academic ready kid to get a TWO YEAR LEG UP on the other kids - not because he needs it, but because you're extra ambitious for him. Go pray on that. I don't think Jesus would approve of abusing the loopholes like this.

p.s. Check your math!

[Anonymous]

I hope colleges take note of this weird trend and adjust accordingly. But they won't. This is just a general comment: if a critical mass of people start doing this, there will be social and economic costs to those who don't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thank you to the mothers/fathers who answered my question. Everyone who answered the question seemed to advise being confident and to the point. Thank you for the advice. I am excited about the future.

Yes, my son will turn 7 a few days or weeks before K graduation. He will be 6 the whole school year like many other children. Children start turning 6 on day one. And in my social circle, just about everybody redshirted for August and September and a few July/June too. Sorry if it bothers you or makes you think ill of me or my child but I had to do what is best for my child, of course. I researched this and thought about it for over a year and discussed and researched this ad nausuem. It's an old and dull subject to me now- read so many articles, books, comments, and had many conversations with friends and relatives. It's a dead horse- the debate of whether to redshirt or not. I already decided to do it and I just wanted advice from "veterans" so to speak. My own child told me if he's ever the youngest- to get him outta there! lol All the important people in my life are on board w it. It's what we did and are doing.


Yes, he will turn 19 a few days or weeks before high school graduation, as did my husband. We met in college and I never cared or noticed much that we had the same birthday but were in different grades. Actually this is a bonus for me because it gives me more time to influence and teach my child and gives him more time to mature. I graduated from college at 17 and did well but would have much preferred my child's path.

Please don't turn this thread into a redshirt debate- there are 9430940329 of those elsewhere and all over the internet. We don't need another one.

Besides, I know its cliché but every child and every family is different and has different needs. One of the main things I am looking forward to about having another year of half-day school is that my husband will be able to have father/son time with our child. He has been out of the country for 3 years. I'm not going to tell people this though, I am going to stick with "It was/is best for our family." Not going to protest too much in person

Still trying to understand -- if a kid turns six in August or September - I don't have an issue with that. They were five when K started or just turned six. Which as I understand it is the requirment. You can put them in at five but at six they must go. Your poor kid has been six almost a WHOLE year! And, he will be precluded from sports teams with his class mates because teams are getting strict with the ages and when kids are born. Your kid turns SEVEN in K! He will be so bored.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Redshirted late August girl. I just say was right for us.
Honestly wasn't even a close call. Who cares what others think?

August and September seem fine to me. Your kid will be 18 when they graduate and not 17 (which that seems so much worse).

I am still trying to understand why you would red shirt a May kid.

[Anonymous]

We redshirted my late July girl and regret it now that she is headed to 4th. She doesn't like being the oldest in her class and now I realize she really would have been fine starting on time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
My post was seeking "been there- done that" from parents who gave their kids the gift the time My post was not an apology or explanation/reason as to why I am redshirting my child. Numerous posters tried to dissuade me or stated my reasoning was poor, etc.. I did not list my reasons- which are many. If I must, I would say our family is not ready for a 7 hour day yet. I could have found a half-day kindergarten but I am new to all of this. Also, my son is very physical and is a class clown. he enjoys being silly and playing around. My family is in the position where half of the children in the grade below are closer in age to my child than half of the children in his grade. So either way, my son is going to be too young or too old. I do understand this could change, it may have been an anomaly. However I grew up in Hawaii and if we go back there the cutoff is July 31 and redshirting here will be a good move for us. Lastly, yes, my child doesn't want to be the youngest. He just doesn't. If that bothers him, it bothers me. My prek teacher also recs redshirting him.

What does it mean that your family isn't ready for a 7 hour day? Does it mean you aren't ready for your kid to be gone 7 hours a day or you logistically can't figure things out?

On the second point, are you afraid of an ADD diagnosis in the future? Do you think if you hold him back the behavior will get better?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So your kid will turn 7 in kindergarten? Yeah I wouldn't celebrate his 7th birthday with his kinder friends. My son who just finished 2nd grade is still 7.

I agree. That is insane. My child will celebrate their 5th birthday in kindergarten. The fact that your 7 year old may be in class with my 5 year old is ridiculous.

My child will turn 7 in second grade, too. You have not done the right thing by him or his classmates, and you know it - hence your extreme self-consciousness, embarrassment about birthday parties, and longwinded, overexplaining posts. You want just want your athletic, academic ready kid to get a TWO YEAR LEG UP on the other kids - not because he needs it, but because you're extra ambitious for him. Go pray on that. I don't think Jesus would approve of abusing the loopholes like this.

p.s. Check your math!

You're faking a confidence you don't feel, OP - your long and defensive posts tell all. Redshirting a child as old as yours was a shady move, as you well know. He's going to be bored, and yes, the other parents (and teachers) will think less of you for such a late redshirting.



Other PPs have also made good points about athletic ineligibility, age adjustments on testing, and the risk of statutory charges for your son in h.s. He'll have you to thank. Wow.

[Anonymous]

We are redshirting our late september twins (cut off is Oct 1). My husband was born the same time of year. He hated starting at four and he hated graduating at 17 and being the youngest. It was tough on him. Personally sending a 17 year old off to college really did not appeal to me.

We talked to their preschool and a few other educators and figure the three days is not a huge deal. I still struggled with it. I thought that they would be the oldest in the class. Guess I am wrong. They will graduate at 18 and be slighly older.

[Anonymous]

Just curious, has anyone redshirted an earlier-summer (May/June/July) second or third child? If so, what was the motivation?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hope colleges take note of this weird trend and adjust accordingly. But they won't. This is just a general comment: if a critical mass of people start doing this, there will be social and economic costs to those who don't.

We didn't redshirt any of our summer boys, and they are doing fine.

There are social and economic costs to holding back a kid who is ready.

[Anonymous]

OP, To answer your questions: Yes people will question your decision and talk about you and your son. Kids will say things to your son and talk about him and make fun of him. You are not only redshirting, but practicing a more extreme form of redshirting and you will be judged and questioned, especially since there is no obvious reason for holding back - if your child indeed is academically and athletically advanced. Your reason for holding back is so he won't be the youngest (he won't even be the youngest with a may birthday as there are kids born June-October starting on time or testing in early) and so he can have one more "fun" year. If asked, I don't know if I would list these as the reasons for holding back because they are not really valid reasons. This will be your reality, but it sounds like you are confident in your decision, so stop worrying about the rest.

[Anonymous]

Just be prepared that any accomplishment your child makes will be accompanied by a disclaimer "....but he's SO much older, of course he's a better fill-in-the-blank".

Everyone will know by end of kindergarten what you did, and that stigma will me with him. As you can see by this thread, other parents don't like it.

I wouldnt want to saddle my child with that

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, To answer your questions: Yes people will question your decision and talk about you and your son. Kids will say things to your son and talk about him and make fun of him. You are not only redshirting, but practicing a more extreme form of redshirting and you will be judged and questioned, especially since there is no obvious reason for holding back - if your child indeed is academically and athletically advanced. Your reason for holding back is so he won't be the youngest (he won't even be the youngest with a may birthday as there are kids born June-October starting on time or testing in early) and so he can have one more "fun" year. If asked, I don't know if I would list these as the reasons for holding back because they are not really valid reasons. This will be your reality, but it sounds like you are confident in your decision, so stop worrying about the rest.

This, except for the bolded. I think if you do this, you need to become confident and own it. Honestly, it's not a big deal. Probably he'll be better at some things physically, but so what. He might be bored in class, but hopefully you can figure out how to challenge him. It will be a little weird for him, but life will go on.