Hosting step-grandson for two weeks- how to deal with food fussiness

[Anonymous]

When is the last time you have seen this kid? If you mentioned that I missed it. Kids change. Obviously you are not close and do not have regular visits. A kid may only want hotdogs and say ewww when he’s 9 then do a 180 and is a vegetarian by the time they are 12. I’m guessing it’s been at least a year since you’ve been around him for an extended period of time since he’s staying for two weeks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She said that she would be expected to do 50% of the cooking. Because it's two weeks, and not two days. That's not hard to believe.

She can say no. She’s in her 40s. Lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When is the last time you have seen this kid? If you mentioned that I missed it. Kids change. Obviously you are not close and do not have regular visits. A kid may only want hotdogs and say ewww when he’s 9 then do a 180 and is a vegetarian by the time they are 12. I’m guessing it’s been at least a year since you’ve been around him for an extended period of time since he’s staying for two weeks. [/quote

OP here-saw him last Christmas. It's not like this child is visiting us for the first time in ages. He was only supposed to stay for one week but it ended up being two for reasons unknown to us. He's the kind of kid who needs to have a lot of attention. Not the type to just sit down and read. He used to reject my ideas to take him to the library so I just gave up trying to connect with him. Sorry to ruffle your feathers but I'm saying like it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When is the last time you have seen this kid? If you mentioned that I missed it. Kids change. Obviously you are not close and do not have regular visits. A kid may only want hotdogs and say ewww when he’s 9 then do a 180 and is a vegetarian by the time they are 12. I’m guessing it’s been at least a year since you’ve been around him for an extended period of time since he’s staying for two weeks. [/quote

OP here-saw him last Christmas. It's not like this child is visiting us for the first time in ages. He was only supposed to stay for one week but it ended up being two for reasons unknown to us. He's the kind of kid who needs to have a lot of attention. Not the type to just sit down and read. He used to reject my ideas to take him to the library so I just gave up trying to connect with him. Sorry to ruffle your feathers but I'm saying like it is.

The more you post about your (step)grandson, the more I wish he had somewhere else to be for the 2 weeks. Do you have children of your own?

My grandson has a step mom, that he calls mommy and her mom is thrilled to be a grandma. They rarely explain he's a "step". Our grandson has behavior issues, not perfect, but we love him and would never give up on him. You sound miserable. Maybe you're a troll....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When is the last time you have seen this kid? If you mentioned that I missed it. Kids change. Obviously you are not close and do not have regular visits. A kid may only want hotdogs and say ewww when he’s 9 then do a 180 and is a vegetarian by the time they are 12. I’m guessing it’s been at least a year since you’ve been around him for an extended period of time since he’s staying for two weeks. [/quote

OP here-saw him last Christmas. It's not like this child is visiting us for the first time in ages. He was only supposed to stay for one week but it ended up being two for reasons unknown to us. He's the kind of kid who needs to have a lot of attention. Not the type to just sit down and read. He used to reject my ideas to take him to the library so I just gave up trying to connect with him. Sorry to ruffle your feathers but I'm saying like it is.

He added a week to spend time with his grandfather. That’s not hard to understand. How old is your husband? If you tell us where you live we could provide suggestions for restaurants or places to go in your area. 12 yo boys do not want to go to the library.

[Anonymous]

Hell, my son has NEVER wanted to go to the library.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When is the last time you have seen this kid? If you mentioned that I missed it. Kids change. Obviously you are not close and do not have regular visits. A kid may only want hotdogs and say ewww when he’s 9 then do a 180 and is a vegetarian by the time they are 12. I’m guessing it’s been at least a year since you’ve been around him for an extended period of time since he’s staying for two weeks. [/quote

OP here-saw him last Christmas. It's not like this child is visiting us for the first time in ages. He was only supposed to stay for one week but it ended up being two for reasons unknown to us. He's the kind of kid who needs to have a lot of attention. Not the type to just sit down and read. He used to reject my ideas to take him to the library so I just gave up trying to connect with him. Sorry to ruffle your feathers but I'm saying like it is.

The more you post about your (step)grandson, the more I wish he had somewhere else to be for the 2 weeks. Do you have children of your own?

My grandson has a step mom, that he calls mommy and her mom is thrilled to be a grandma. They rarely explain he's a "step". Our grandson has behavior issues, not perfect, but we love him and would never give up on him. You sound miserable. Maybe you're a troll....

OP already indicated she doesn't have children way earlier in this thread. Anyway, kids are hard especially if they aren't yours and you aren't used to them.

[Anonymous]

It seems that you dislike your step-grandson!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:. He's the kind of kid who needs to have a lot of attention. Not the type to just sit down and read. He used to reject my ideas to take him to the library so I just gave up trying to connect with him. Sorry to ruffle your feathers but I'm saying like it is.

You tried one thing. Wow. And one that you knew he wouldn’t like since he doesn’t like to sit down and read. The food thing is bad but this really explains things.

Maybe you could find a day camp that provides breakfast and lunch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Having a limited selection of American foods that he eats is not "plenty of foods". It's embarrassing that more parents cannot encourage their children to eat better.

Might be, but it is not the job of step-grandma to correct this situation in a 2 week visit.

She can still introduce him to new foods. Why is that considered bad? It's her home; she shouldn't have to feel like the family's dining habits are being overhauled for a 12yo. And I think that is where the conflict lies. The 12yo shouldn't be running the show. When I was growing up none of the grownups ask me what they should be cooking, and they shouldn't have. It's the same philosophy I have with my own children to the chagrin of my sister who gives in to her children so readily. I see how differently our children behave and I have no doubt it is because my kids don't get their way but hers do.

Okay, tell the parents and let them decide whether to send their son. OP is trying to do this sneakily so the parents don't know. When your kids go to your sister's house and she's serving pizza, mac and cheese, and hamburgers for meals, plus ice cream for dessert, do you want her to sneak and do that or do you want her to be upfront and say she's serving what she feels like? Same thing here. OP can serve whatever she wants, just be an adult and tell the parents instead of being sneaky about it.

I don't allow my children to be on their own at my sister's. They usually come over to ours when they visit the East Coast and we eat together as a family. They do wrinkle their noses at quinoa and avocado smoothies but I am not stocking up on unhealthy foods because of them. My sister knows I am who I am and if she has a problem, she can feed her kids junk food before coming over.

The point is that you and your sister are clear on the rules, no hiding. OP needs to be upfront with the parents and if they choose to send their kid anyway, OP has no reason to bend her rules.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When is the last time you have seen this kid? If you mentioned that I missed it. Kids change. Obviously you are not close and do not have regular visits. A kid may only want hotdogs and say ewww when he’s 9 then do a 180 and is a vegetarian by the time they are 12. I’m guessing it’s been at least a year since you’ve been around him for an extended period of time since he’s staying for two weeks. [/quote

OP here-saw him last Christmas. It's not like this child is visiting us for the first time in ages. He was only supposed to stay for one week but it ended up being two for reasons unknown to us. He's the kind of kid who needs to have a lot of attention. Not the type to just sit down and read. He used to reject my ideas to take him to the library so I just gave up trying to connect with him. Sorry to ruffle your feathers but I'm saying like it is.

The more you post about your (step)grandson, the more I wish he had somewhere else to be for the 2 weeks. Do you have children of your own?

My grandson has a step mom, that he calls mommy and her mom is thrilled to be a grandma. They rarely explain he's a "step". Our grandson has behavior issues, not perfect, but we love him and would never give up on him. You sound miserable. Maybe you're a troll....

OP already indicated she doesn't have children way earlier in this thread. Anyway, kids are hard especially if they aren't yours and you aren't used to them.

Sorry I missed reading that she doesn't have children. Kids are a lot if you aren't used to them. I suggested earlier that she go away for the 2 weeks. Let grandpa and grandson bond. She clearly should just stay away.

[Anonymous]

Day camp is a great idea!! Seriously op, look into it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When is the last time you have seen this kid? If you mentioned that I missed it. Kids change. Obviously you are not close and do not have regular visits. A kid may only want hotdogs and say ewww when he’s 9 then do a 180 and is a vegetarian by the time they are 12. I’m guessing it’s been at least a year since you’ve been around him for an extended period of time since he’s staying for two weeks. [/quote

OP here-saw him last Christmas. It's not like this child is visiting us for the first time in ages. He was only supposed to stay for one week but it ended up being two for reasons unknown to us. He's the kind of kid who needs to have a lot of attention. Not the type to just sit down and read. He used to reject my ideas to take him to the library so I just gave up trying to connect with him. Sorry to ruffle your feathers but I'm saying like it is.

So because a child 12 or under doesn't want to go to the library on his vacation you gave up trying to connect with him? You sound very rigid. Just tell DH you don't want his grandson to come. You're going to make the poor child miserable with your perception that kids are to do as they are told and will eat vegetables and read. No fun allowed. My step dad treats my kids as well as his biological grandkids. I feel bad for your step grandchild, you're going to ruin his relationship with his granddad because you don't like him.

[Anonymous]

OP, you definitely should tame a vacation while the kids is visiting. Your clearly don’t like this kid and didn’t really want him to visit. So why stick around and make everyone miserable? It sort of sounds like you don’t particularly like kids at all—that’s totally fine but just don’t take it out on this kid that he happens to be a kid! Tell your husband you think you’ll have a better relationship with Larlo in another decade and that you forgot you have a very pressing engagement in the Bahamas (or wherever) that week! Please!

[Anonymous]

What a spoiled brat. Tell him to eat what is served.