Van Lifer couple camping in Utah national park - two weeks later fiancee arrives in FL alone

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She was killed 2 weeks after the police encounter. What were the police supposed to do with her to prevent that from happening 2 weeks later? They separated them. She went right back to him within 12 hours.

The people who failed her were her parents and friends. They were the ones who had any chance of getting her to wise up and leave this looser. If I was her mom or dad I'd be on an airplane the day of that call with the police. When I was growing up, my dad did crazy stuff like that for me. When I was in graduate school (early 20s) he once drove 12 hours straight to help me move out of a bad situation. He just got in the car, arrived and helped me get my sh%t together. That's what parents are supposed to do, even with young 20 somethings. And friends too. Where were her friends in this? They had to have known that she was dating a verbally abusive loser.

Wrong.

The person who failed her was her fiancé. Then after that his parents.

No offense, but it doesn’t sound like they were really engaged.

Okay, let's stick to the important stuff instead of petty nonsense.

Yes what is happening with Dog?

Oh, he's a follow-on-er looking for another 15 minutes of fame.

Yeah the more attention Dog gets the less likely people are to continue looking for Brian Landerie. People will have bystander effect and assume between Dog, FBI and Police that they’ve got a hold of where he is and stop paying attention everywhere else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sadly, at the end of the day, it’s pretty difficult to help someone who doesn’t want or isn’t ready for help. She could have said so many things to the police or her parents there that she didn’t say. She absolutely did not deserve what happened to her, but people are not mind readers. It’s really easy after the fact to say what you would have done.

People who had received proper training in domestic violence and followed that training would have been far more use to her than what she received. The police knew that an eyewitness had reported seen him hitting her multiple times — no need for mind reading. The lengths some of you go to defend incompetence is quite something.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:After watching both police videos, I shake my head how the police could not see what a con artist Brian was. Look at his body language, how he seems so hyper, apologized over and over while nervously making little jokes. Didn’t those cops ever see Chris Watts body language after his wife/kids went “missing?” Same body language, smiling while playing a part. Brian was displaying sociopathic vibes like Chris was. And hopefully will share the same fate too.
I watch these videos of Gabby basically crying out to whoever will listen. So many cries for help.
I want to tell her, Gabby leave him at the hotel. Let him have a hot shower and a real bed to sleep in. Meanwhile get in the van and drive, drive all night if you can. Go home to your parents. Let Brian figure out the rest after his little free mini-vaca. The Bowen Hotel ain’t too bad.

Hindsight is 20/20. The cops surely see a lot of nervous, apologetic people. They did their job and separated the two to cool down for the night. They listened to Gabby, but they aren’t psychologists, social workers, or psychics. There are limits to what they are allowed to do, especially since Brian was the one sporting scratches, and Gabby didn’t in fact “cry for help.”

+1

+2. Exactly. Sad if anyone loses their job over this.

In a world with no training in domestic violence maybe. It’s pretty much domestic violence 101 that an abused woman will not admit abuse to strangers. Also that abusers are liars. Which is why the initial report from a neutral third party that he was hitting her should have guided all subsequent police action.

I don't get it that Brian is labeled as a domestic abuser. Where are the bruises on Gabby? It looks like that girl took so many pictures of herself that surely, there would some indication of his previous abusing behavior.

Listen, I think this guy is a dirt bag for what he did after she disappeared but that doesn't make him an abuser. Save that terms for dudes who actually abuse. Brian is just a low life dirt bag with no conscious.

He literally killed his girlfriend you weirdo. What is murder if not abuse...

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sadly, at the end of the day, it’s pretty difficult to help someone who doesn’t want or isn’t ready for help. She could have said so many things to the police or her parents there that she didn’t say. She absolutely did not deserve what happened to her, but people are not mind readers. It’s really easy after the fact to say what you would have done.

People who had received proper training in domestic violence and followed that training would have been far more use to her than what she received. The police knew that an eyewitness had reported seen him hitting her multiple times — no need for mind reading. The lengths some of you go to defend incompetence is quite something.

DP the lengths people go to defending BL over the police is quite something.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She was killed 2 weeks after the police encounter. What were the police supposed to do with her to prevent that from happening 2 weeks later? They separated them. She went right back to him within 12 hours.

The people who failed her were her parents and friends. They were the ones who had any chance of getting her to wise up and leave this looser. If I was her mom or dad I'd be on an airplane the day of that call with the police. When I was growing up, my dad did crazy stuff like that for me. When I was in graduate school (early 20s) he once drove 12 hours straight to help me move out of a bad situation. He just got in the car, arrived and helped me get my sh%t together. That's what parents are supposed to do, even with young 20 somethings. And friends too. Where were her friends in this? They had to have known that she was dating a verbally abusive loser.

Still, the police should have anticipated what would happen.

This is why their funding must be cut, and used instead for training them to better handle these type situations, provide counseling to women like Gabby, and lock up men like Brian.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She was killed 2 weeks after the police encounter. What were the police supposed to do with her to prevent that from happening 2 weeks later? They separated them. She went right back to him within 12 hours.

The people who failed her were her parents and friends. They were the ones who had any chance of getting her to wise up and leave this looser. If I was her mom or dad I'd be on an airplane the day of that call with the police. When I was growing up, my dad did crazy stuff like that for me. When I was in graduate school (early 20s) he once drove 12 hours straight to help me move out of a bad situation. He just got in the car, arrived and helped me get my sh%t together. That's what parents are supposed to do, even with young 20 somethings. And friends too. Where were her friends in this? They had to have known that she was dating a verbally abusive loser.

Still, the police should have anticipated what would happen.

This is why their funding must be cut, and used instead for training them to better handle these type situations, provide counseling to women like Gabby, and lock up men like Brian.

Should we forgo putting people like BL on trial and let social workers handle it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sadly, at the end of the day, it’s pretty difficult to help someone who doesn’t want or isn’t ready for help. She could have said so many things to the police or her parents there that she didn’t say. She absolutely did not deserve what happened to her, but people are not mind readers. It’s really easy after the fact to say what you would have done.

People who had received proper training in domestic violence and followed that training would have been far more use to her than what she received. The police knew that an eyewitness had reported seen him hitting her multiple times — no need for mind reading. The lengths some of you go to defend incompetence is quite something.

Gabby told the officer that she hit Brian first, and that he didn’t hit her, he “grabbed her face” in the altercation. It’s really not clear why some of you think that the officers should have disregarded what Gabby herself had to say. They were already giving her a break by not charging her for instigating the whole thing, as she claimed to have done.

Expecting police officers to disregard what a woman has to say is some pretty f’d up thinking. We’ve fought for generations to move beyond that kind of societal norm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She was killed 2 weeks after the police encounter. What were the police supposed to do with her to prevent that from happening 2 weeks later? They separated them. She went right back to him within 12 hours.

The people who failed her were her parents and friends. They were the ones who had any chance of getting her to wise up and leave this looser. If I was her mom or dad I'd be on an airplane the day of that call with the police. When I was growing up, my dad did crazy stuff like that for me. When I was in graduate school (early 20s) he once drove 12 hours straight to help me move out of a bad situation. He just got in the car, arrived and helped me get my sh%t together. That's what parents are supposed to do, even with young 20 somethings. And friends too. Where were her friends in this? They had to have known that she was dating a verbally abusive loser.

Still, the police should have anticipated what would happen.

This is why their funding must be cut, and used instead for training them to better handle these type situations, provide counseling to women like Gabby, and lock up men like Brian.

Gmafb. Her parents, who knew him for years, didn’t even anticipate what would happen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She was killed 2 weeks after the police encounter. What were the police supposed to do with her to prevent that from happening 2 weeks later? They separated them. She went right back to him within 12 hours.

The people who failed her were her parents and friends. They were the ones who had any chance of getting her to wise up and leave this looser. If I was her mom or dad I'd be on an airplane the day of that call with the police. When I was growing up, my dad did crazy stuff like that for me. When I was in graduate school (early 20s) he once drove 12 hours straight to help me move out of a bad situation. He just got in the car, arrived and helped me get my sh%t together. That's what parents are supposed to do, even with young 20 somethings. And friends too. Where were her friends in this? They had to have known that she was dating a verbally abusive loser.

Still, the police should have anticipated what would happen.

This is why their funding must be cut, and used instead for training them to better handle these type situations, provide counseling to women like Gabby, and lock up men like Brian.

Gmafb. Her parents, who knew him for years, didn’t even anticipate what would happen.

Agree. People say they want the police to act like the Minority Report (beck in of the movie) but they would not like it in reality.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:After watching both police videos, I shake my head how the police could not see what a con artist Brian was. Look at his body language, how he seems so hyper, apologized over and over while nervously making little jokes. Didn’t those cops ever see Chris Watts body language after his wife/kids went “missing?” Same body language, smiling while playing a part. Brian was displaying sociopathic vibes like Chris was. And hopefully will share the same fate too.
I watch these videos of Gabby basically crying out to whoever will listen. So many cries for help.
I want to tell her, Gabby leave him at the hotel. Let him have a hot shower and a real bed to sleep in. Meanwhile get in the van and drive, drive all night if you can. Go home to your parents. Let Brian figure out the rest after his little free mini-vaca. The Bowen Hotel ain’t too bad.

Hindsight is 20/20. The cops surely see a lot of nervous, apologetic people. They did their job and separated the two to cool down for the night. They listened to Gabby, but they aren’t psychologists, social workers, or psychics. There are limits to what they are allowed to do, especially since Brian was the one sporting scratches, and Gabby didn’t in fact “cry for help.”

+1

+2. Exactly. Sad if anyone loses their job over this.

In a world with no training in domestic violence maybe. It’s pretty much domestic violence 101 that an abused woman will not admit abuse to strangers. Also that abusers are liars. Which is why the initial report from a neutral third party that he was hitting her should have guided all subsequent police action.

I don't get it that Brian is labeled as a domestic abuser. Where are the bruises on Gabby? It looks like that girl took so many pictures of herself that surely, there would some indication of his previous abusing behavior.

Listen, I think this guy is a dirt bag for what he did after she disappeared but that doesn't make him an abuser. Save that terms for dudes who actually abuse. Brian is just a low life dirt bag with no conscious.

He could slap her or have rough sex with her. Neither would show up in photos.

He could hit her with a sack of oranges, which hurts and doesn’t leave bruises.

[Anonymous]

I watched the bodycam video very early on and was one of the few people in this thread who thought she definitely was a victim and that Brian was definitely the abuser-- just based on their statements and behavior.

But cops aren't in the business of reading into situations to find the deeper truths. They are in the business of enforcing the law. Gabby was claiming fault for everything that went wrong between her and Brian, and Brian was saying a lot of words that didn't form a cohesive message. You can't form an actual case against Brian based on your biases. And my read of the situation comes from biases based on my interactions with DV victims and abusers, and my own experiences with DV. Victims see themselves as completely at fault so its not easy for cops to make a case.

I really don't blame the cops. Yes, they said some misogynistic stuff but we live In a misogynistic world, and it's unrealistic to think that cops will be anything other than normal and average when it comes to enlightened thinking about gender (and race). They spent over an hour with Gabby and Brian and did what they felt they could to de-escalate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I watched the bodycam video very early on and was one of the few people in this thread who thought she definitely was a victim and that Brian was definitely the abuser-- just based on their statements and behavior.

But cops aren't in the business of reading into situations to find the deeper truths. They are in the business of enforcing the law. Gabby was claiming fault for everything that went wrong between her and Brian, and Brian was saying a lot of words that didn't form a cohesive message. You can't form an actual case against Brian based on your biases. And my read of the situation comes from biases based on my interactions with DV victims and abusers, and my own experiences with DV. Victims see themselves as completely at fault so its not easy for cops to make a case.

I really don't blame the cops. Yes, they said some misogynistic stuff but we live In a misogynistic world, and it's unrealistic to think that cops will be anything other than normal and average when it comes to enlightened thinking about gender (and race). They spent over an hour with Gabby and Brian and did what they felt they could to de-escalate.

This is not true AT ALL.

Cops don’t enforce laws, laws are broken and cops show up.

Their job is to arrest people who already committed a crime.

Cops are trained to determine reasonable suspicion. They determine who, from what they observe, is possibly guilty. .. within reason, reasonable suspicion. Not guilty Beyond a reasonable doubt. Just possibly.

Anybody who sees the video and does not ask why does he have injuries on his face is irresponsible.

The cops know they were fighting.

The cops know she is upset, he is calm.

The cops know he has injuries on his face.

<the rest is not the cops fault, lack of training… social norm, idk but they F’d up>=

Their conclusion is she attacked him not she hit him defend herself.

Now she is dead.

[Anonymous]

So apparently half a dozen or more tips that he's in North Carolina/Appalachian Trail area. Who knows if it's true but it seems more likely if a half dozen people are claiming to have seen him as opposed to the other "sightings" in Alabama and in a hotel in Canada which was 1 person each time; like after a certain point, can a ton of people be wrong about someone's identity?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She was killed 2 weeks after the police encounter. What were the police supposed to do with her to prevent that from happening 2 weeks later? They separated them. She went right back to him within 12 hours.

The people who failed her were her parents and friends. They were the ones who had any chance of getting her to wise up and leave this looser. If I was her mom or dad I'd be on an airplane the day of that call with the police. When I was growing up, my dad did crazy stuff like that for me. When I was in graduate school (early 20s) he once drove 12 hours straight to help me move out of a bad situation. He just got in the car, arrived and helped me get my sh%t together. That's what parents are supposed to do, even with young 20 somethings. And friends too. Where were her friends in this? They had to have known that she was dating a verbally abusive loser.

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