Husband told me I don't have enough friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wait until you have kids. You'll be writing on here that you have no mom friends. Wonder why?

So what if it's a few hours with the other guy's wife? Shorten it if you like, by saying you need a nap or whatever. She probably isn't that excited to meet you either. You'll make it work.

That's what I told my husband: these other people probably have no desire to be around me either, so why don't the guys just do their own thing.

I can't see myself wanting mom friends.

BECAUSE THEY ARE DOING IT TO MAKE THEIR HUSBAND HAPPY. They don't care about you, but their husband wants to hang out with your husband, and instead of just throwing their hands up and saying "No can do, I wanna sit in the dark and eat saltines all weekend" they're like, "Sure, I can make that work."

I think it would be different if I was saying my husband couldn't go to these events, but I have no issue with him going on a weekend trip with friends! I just don't want to go. I don't know why I am needed there.

[Anonymous]

Ha ha ha! If the grandparents don't help you with kids, nobody else will. Your DH is delulu.

Also, why don't you arrange for similar expeditions with your friend and their spouse for DH to participate in? If you have to play nice with the wife of your husband's friend, he also have to do with your friends. Take him along for thrifting and clothes shopping.

Though, I have to say (being an introvert myself), part of adulting is the ability to spend social time with people you may not know very well. Google what you can do at the new place that you may like? Shopping, going to a museum or historic place, going for spa treatments...I mean there are a bunch of things you can do with someone else. If the wife is not interested in doing these things - you should then go solo.

[Anonymous]

This is a you problem OP. Stop the damn whining your husband won’t want to stay married with you acting like this all the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wait until you have kids. You'll be writing on here that you have no mom friends. Wonder why?

So what if it's a few hours with the other guy's wife? Shorten it if you like, by saying you need a nap or whatever. She probably isn't that excited to meet you either. You'll make it work.

That's what I told my husband: these other people probably have no desire to be around me either, so why don't the guys just do their own thing.

I can't see myself wanting mom friends.

BECAUSE THEY ARE DOING IT TO MAKE THEIR HUSBAND HAPPY. They don't care about you, but their husband wants to hang out with your husband, and instead of just throwing their hands up and saying "No can do, I wanna sit in the dark and eat saltines all weekend" they're like, "Sure, I can make that work."

I think it would be different if I was saying my husband couldn't go to these events, but I have no issue with him going on a weekend trip with friends! I just don't want to go. I don't know why I am needed there.

Because he wants to include you in something? Good God woman, you are exhausting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ha ha ha! If the grandparents don't help you with kids, nobody else will. Your DH is delulu.

Also, why don't you arrange for similar expeditions with your friend and their spouse for DH to participate in? If you have to play nice with the wife of your husband's friend, he also have to do with your friends. Take him along for thrifting and clothes shopping.

Though, I have to say (being an introvert myself), part of adulting is the ability to spend social time with people you may not know very well. Google what you can do at the new place that you may like? Shopping, going to a museum or historic place, going for spa treatments...I mean there are a bunch of things you can do with someone else. If the wife is not interested in doing these things - you should then go solo.

I agree as a fellow introvert, but given OP's replies and shitty attitude I don't think she's mastered "adulting."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You sound more like a b*t*h than an introvert.

This. I was mostly on her side at first bc I'm an introvert myself but omfg every response she has some curt reply. "I'm not obligated to do that." "They don't wanna hang out with me either." Good lord.

She sounds depressed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wait until you have kids. You'll be writing on here that you have no mom friends. Wonder why?

So what if it's a few hours with the other guy's wife? Shorten it if you like, by saying you need a nap or whatever. She probably isn't that excited to meet you either. You'll make it work.

That's what I told my husband: these other people probably have no desire to be around me either, so why don't the guys just do their own thing.

I can't see myself wanting mom friends.

BECAUSE THEY ARE DOING IT TO MAKE THEIR HUSBAND HAPPY. They don't care about you, but their husband wants to hang out with your husband, and instead of just throwing their hands up and saying "No can do, I wanna sit in the dark and eat saltines all weekend" they're like, "Sure, I can make that work."

Would OP husband would gladly hang out with the other DH while OP and her BFF have a spa weekend? It sounds absurd just typing that out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wait until you have kids. You'll be writing on here that you have no mom friends. Wonder why?

So what if it's a few hours with the other guy's wife? Shorten it if you like, by saying you need a nap or whatever. She probably isn't that excited to meet you either. You'll make it work.

That's what I told my husband: these other people probably have no desire to be around me either, so why don't the guys just do their own thing.

I can't see myself wanting mom friends.

BECAUSE THEY ARE DOING IT TO MAKE THEIR HUSBAND HAPPY. They don't care about you, but their husband wants to hang out with your husband, and instead of just throwing their hands up and saying "No can do, I wanna sit in the dark and eat saltines all weekend" they're like, "Sure, I can make that work."

I think it would be different if I was saying my husband couldn't go to these events, but I have no issue with him going on a weekend trip with friends! I just don't want to go. I don't know why I am needed there.

Because your DH is trying to have a social life as a couple. He wants to have friends, he wants to have plans, he wants to meet people and when he has kids he wants them to have other kids to play with. Sorry OP. You are the A**hole.

Creating a social group requires effort to socialize. You are not willing to do that and I am finding your excuses very suspect. You are coming across as unpleasant, socially inapt, sulky and disengaged.

[Anonymous]

I'm an introvert too but honestly you sound inflexible and snotty. It's not the same for him to go out with couples and his wife stays at home constantly. You may find out that you DO get along with some of them, I have and they are now good friends.

Honestly, you two never should have gotten married. He's going to resent you more and more. Id think a lot before having kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm an introvert too but honestly you sound inflexible and snotty. It's not the same for him to go out with couples and his wife stays at home constantly. You may find out that you DO get along with some of them, I have and they are now good friends.

Honestly, you two never should have gotten married. He's going to resent you more and more. Id think a lot before having kids.

Yeah, well judging from the responses I'm a horrible person / bad partner, etc., so yes, I am considering just leaving as clearly everyone would be better off w/o me.

[Anonymous]

NP here and an introvert. I have definitely gone on a few trips with my husband's friends and their wives. It's something my DH really values and over the years it has gotten easier and they are good people. I don't need to be besties with their wives.

I think if it was every weekend I would put my foot down but OP does sound a bit stubborn.

And now that we have a kid I have definitely been the one to go out and make neighborhood friends for my DC's sake and it is frustrating when DH doesn't make an effort. That being said the comment about "nobody helping you" is bizarre. When you have kids it's not going to much help to be friends with random women without kids or with kids of very different ages.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wait until you have kids. You'll be writing on here that you have no mom friends. Wonder why?

So what if it's a few hours with the other guy's wife? Shorten it if you like, by saying you need a nap or whatever. She probably isn't that excited to meet you either. You'll make it work.

That's what I told my husband: these other people probably have no desire to be around me either, so why don't the guys just do their own thing.

I can't see myself wanting mom friends.

BECAUSE THEY ARE DOING IT TO MAKE THEIR HUSBAND HAPPY. They don't care about you, but their husband wants to hang out with your husband, and instead of just throwing their hands up and saying "No can do, I wanna sit in the dark and eat saltines all weekend" they're like, "Sure, I can make that work."

Would OP husband would gladly hang out with the other DH while OP and her BFF have a spa weekend? It sounds absurd just typing that out.

I am sure. They would probably go and play golf or go for a beer.

I really think OP has low self-esteem or body issues. She may feel that she does not compare with the other wife.

-DP

[Anonymous]

Your " I'm better than them" and generally bad attitude is going to be a death sentence for your marriage. You also need to suck it up and be friendly with moms when your kid is little for the sake of their friendships. Becoming known as the snotty mom who thinks she's too good for everyone will be a detriment to your kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm an introvert too but honestly you sound inflexible and snotty. It's not the same for him to go out with couples and his wife stays at home constantly. You may find out that you DO get along with some of them, I have and they are now good friends.

Honestly, you two never should have gotten married. He's going to resent you more and more. Id think a lot before having kids.

Yeah, well judging from the responses I'm a horrible person / bad partner, etc., so yes, I am considering just leaving as clearly everyone would be better off w/o me.

OK, drama llama. Grow up. I pity your DH.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your " I'm better than them" and generally bad attitude is going to be a death sentence for your marriage. You also need to suck it up and be friendly with moms when your kid is little for the sake of their friendships. Becoming known as the snotty mom who thinks she's too good for everyone will be a detriment to your kids.

I don't understand why people are getting that I think I am better than other people.