I do not like the parent population at my kids school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you’ve been in the area for 10 plus years and we don’t either already know each other or have several mutual acquaintances, I’m frankly not interested in a new friend. Nothing personal. And if you act pushy and elbowy, I’ll cease even acknowledging you with smiles and nods at pickup and matches. Back off.

Pushy and elbowy? What. Lol lady you are wild.

Is saying hello pushy? Is having a convo about kids or activities elbowy? Or is the idea of someone who has less money or fewer connections deigning to go to school with your kid so upsetting that simply existing in that plane is enough to be iced out by you? You are deranged.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:and I don't know what to do about it. It is a great school but I am miserable.My kids seem happy and that its what matters. I am miserable

Translation: I’m a striver and the rich cool parents haven’t invited me into their orbit. Sorry your social climbing scheme hasn’t worked. If you didn’t have a lot of rich outgoing friends before your kid went to private school — via your neighborhood, career, country club, college and private school alum network, travel sport circuit, church or synagogue — why would you have them now? You have nothing in common, you don’t speak their language, you don’t know so and so and so and so. And frankly, you’re delusional on what private school provides you as a parent. It doesn’t guarantee any parent some brand new social orbit. And anyone who goes in expecting or fishing for that is pegged a social climbing worm from the get-go.

Translation: I'm a horrible human being who will judge you based on your job, clothes, country club, friends, school. I am one of those moms who will give you my elevator pitch on where I went to college twenty years ago, every job I have had since then, and I'll be sure to let you know how rich I am. I am shallow and don't have much depth as a human being so when I see you don't have value you to me I'll ignore you and pretend you don't exist. But I sure am hell nice to people who I deem rich and worthy and you'll see me pandering and lollygagging around them. So if your neighborhood, career, country club, college and private school alumni network aren't up to mine don't bother talking to me.

Are you new here, sweetie? Welcome to Washington. Don’t act like some babe in the woods when you moved to the most ruthlessly competitive, superficial and status and power obsessed place in the Western Hemisphere. Then chose to send your kid to an even more stratified private school. As for OP, if nobody liked him/her before the kid was in private, why would they magically like them now? Nobody likes a thirsty low born interloper; especially a creepy 30, 40 or 50 something one (we’re a long ways from being teenagers first week of college). If you’re that hard up for a friend, go get a spaniel.

DP. Holy shit are you okay? You sound off the hinges psychotic and mean. Op never said no one disliked them before private. They are saying they want to feel welcome at their kids new private. I suspect you may be part of the group she is referring to and now you feel you need to defend yourself and attack op? Please be a better person.

Context is key. Dislike in this context doesn't mean disliked in general, in life, we are specifically referring to the pedigreed private school parents the striver OP seeks to orbit. The point is if OP is an outsider, not a peer or a mutual i.e. friend of a friend to this network of parents, why would she suddenly become fast friends with them just because her kid goes to school there? It is delusional. It is actually pretty wormy and creepy to think or hope that your kid's new school gives you a new group of higher status friends. And if OP's obsessed enough to make a thread crying about it, it certainly projects in real life, which makes her seem transparently pushy and sketchy to the very people she seeks to orbit. You only get one first impression, you know. Rich and powerful are pretty guarded. In Washington, you could be Project Veritas or some foreign spook for all they know. Or just a low born waste of their time. Sorry, only so many hours in a day.

I prefer to be a "low born waste of time." My relationships are real and I never worry that someone likes me because of some arbitrary external characteristic.

I assume you are intentionally misreading OP's original post in order to make yourself feel better. Is that because you know others only care about you because of your status? Or just because reading comprehension is not your thing?

Please get therapy.

The rest of us are busy building quality communities for our children through respecting each other and our differences.

We all know why OP craves to make fast friends with private school privates. For superficial, social climbing reasons. Private parents are seen as wealthier, more powerful, members of clubs, and more connected. So who's really the shallow one? It's not the parents at the school living their life, it's OP for even having this scheme in the first place. Most parents are too busy with life, too busy with their career, obsessing over making new friends at their kid's new school is not on their radar. When it is on your radar, as OP admits, it's weird and creepy. No surprise if parents at the new school see right through that. And if you've gone 40 something years without this caliber of friend group, what makes you entitled to it now? It's frankly delusional.

Please get help. I beg of you for your kids sake. Op never said she was looking for friends. For gods sakes. She just said she would like to meet some friendly fellow parents and feel welcomed into her kids new school. Please get help and I am so concerned for your kids.

You mean that previous post wasn’t satire? Pls tell me it was satire.

No it isn't. She actually talks like this in person after a few glasses of wine. She is demented and possibly borderline psychotic. She thinks she has arrived because she finally got into the country club she wanted to. I worry for her kids because there is something terribly wrong with her.

This. There are a few people that use these actual words and love the phrase striver and speak this way very publicly. I wish they would stop posting for their kids sake because their language is very identifiable. The thing is neither of them present as being elite in person. They present as being sort of trashy and lower class. I don't know what their background is but it does not seem to make a difference in how they appear upon meeting them as they seem lower class in the way they conduct themselves and their language so I don't know why they are judging others as not being in their caliber because they are anything but elite.

I would rather have lunch with the OP any day of the week and I can attest my other DC private school parent friends would as well. BTW we are multi millionaires and are friendly to all families in our grade and consider everyone to be equals.

That caught my eye too. No one uses that phrase. What is wrong about wanting the best for your child? We all strive to do our best, even if it's community college. Why is being a "striver" a negative?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:and I don't know what to do about it. It is a great school but I am miserable.My kids seem happy and that its what matters. I am miserable

Translation: I’m a striver and the rich cool parents haven’t invited me into their orbit. Sorry your social climbing scheme hasn’t worked. If you didn’t have a lot of rich outgoing friends before your kid went to private school — via your neighborhood, career, country club, college and private school alum network, travel sport circuit, church or synagogue — why would you have them now? You have nothing in common, you don’t speak their language, you don’t know so and so and so and so. And frankly, you’re delusional on what private school provides you as a parent. It doesn’t guarantee any parent some brand new social orbit. And anyone who goes in expecting or fishing for that is pegged a social climbing worm from the get-go.

Translation: I'm a horrible human being who will judge you based on your job, clothes, country club, friends, school. I am one of those moms who will give you my elevator pitch on where I went to college twenty years ago, every job I have had since then, and I'll be sure to let you know how rich I am. I am shallow and don't have much depth as a human being so when I see you don't have value you to me I'll ignore you and pretend you don't exist. But I sure am hell nice to people who I deem rich and worthy and you'll see me pandering and lollygagging around them. So if your neighborhood, career, country club, college and private school alumni network aren't up to mine don't bother talking to me.

Are you new here, sweetie? Welcome to Washington. Don’t act like some babe in the woods when you moved to the most ruthlessly competitive, superficial and status and power obsessed place in the Western Hemisphere. Then chose to send your kid to an even more stratified private school. As for OP, if nobody liked him/her before the kid was in private, why would they magically like them now? Nobody likes a thirsty low born interloper; especially a creepy 30, 40 or 50 something one (we’re a long ways from being teenagers first week of college). If you’re that hard up for a friend, go get a spaniel.

DP. Holy shit are you okay? You sound off the hinges psychotic and mean. Op never said no one disliked them before private. They are saying they want to feel welcome at their kids new private. I suspect you may be part of the group she is referring to and now you feel you need to defend yourself and attack op? Please be a better person.

Context is key. Dislike in this context doesn't mean disliked in general, in life, we are specifically referring to the pedigreed private school parents the striver OP seeks to orbit. The point is if OP is an outsider, not a peer or a mutual i.e. friend of a friend to this network of parents, why would she suddenly become fast friends with them just because her kid goes to school there? It is delusional. It is actually pretty wormy and creepy to think or hope that your kid's new school gives you a new group of higher status friends. And if OP's obsessed enough to make a thread crying about it, it certainly projects in real life, which makes her seem transparently pushy and sketchy to the very people she seeks to orbit. You only get one first impression, you know. Rich and powerful are pretty guarded. In Washington, you could be Project Veritas or some foreign spook for all they know. Or just a low born waste of their time. Sorry, only so many hours in a day.

I prefer to be a "low born waste of time." My relationships are real and I never worry that someone likes me because of some arbitrary external characteristic.

I assume you are intentionally misreading OP's original post in order to make yourself feel better. Is that because you know others only care about you because of your status? Or just because reading comprehension is not your thing?

Please get therapy.

The rest of us are busy building quality communities for our children through respecting each other and our differences.

We all know why OP craves to make fast friends with private school privates. For superficial, social climbing reasons. Private parents are seen as wealthier, more powerful, members of clubs, and more connected. So who's really the shallow one? It's not the parents at the school living their life, it's OP for even having this scheme in the first place. Most parents are too busy with life, too busy with their career, obsessing over making new friends at their kid's new school is not on their radar. When it is on your radar, as OP admits, it's weird and creepy. No surprise if parents at the new school see right through that. And if you've gone 40 something years without this caliber of friend group, what makes you entitled to it now? It's frankly delusional.

Please get help. I beg of you for your kids sake. Op never said she was looking for friends. For gods sakes. She just said she would like to meet some friendly fellow parents and feel welcomed into her kids new school. Please get help and I am so concerned for your kids.

You mean that previous post wasn’t satire? Pls tell me it was satire.

No it isn't. She actually talks like this in person after a few glasses of wine. She is demented and possibly borderline psychotic. She thinks she has arrived because she finally got into the country club she wanted to. I worry for her kids because there is something terribly wrong with her.

This. There are a few people that use these actual words and love the phrase striver and speak this way very publicly. I wish they would stop posting for their kids sake because their language is very identifiable. The thing is neither of them present as being elite in person. They present as being sort of trashy and lower class. I don't know what their background is but it does not seem to make a difference in how they appear upon meeting them as they seem lower class in the way they conduct themselves and their language so I don't know why they are judging others as not being in their caliber because they are anything but elite.

I would rather have lunch with the OP any day of the week and I can attest my other DC private school parent friends would as well. BTW we are multi millionaires and are friendly to all families in our grade and consider everyone to be equals.

It’s not about being equals or thinking you’re better than anyone. It’s just not being hard up to make new friends if you’re not new to the area. When someone is middle aged and thirsty to make friends and “network” at a private school, it’s not only tacky, it reeks of inauthentic and wormy interloper. You’re not already friends or friends of friends with these people (prior to attending) because you have nothing in common. Your kid going to their kids’ school doesn’t really change that. And a lot of tight parent groups at private schools are people who’ve known each other for decades; kids are lifer legacies, they play the same travel sports, parents live in the same neighborhoods, work along side each other, many attended the same handful of colleges. A brand new rando is unlikely to penetrate that orbit unless you’re brand new to the region and have some status. If you’re not new to the area, everyone will rightfully assume you’ve been socially sorted.

Why won't you tell us your school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:and I don't know what to do about it. It is a great school but I am miserable.My kids seem happy and that its what matters. I am miserable

Translation: I’m a striver and the rich cool parents haven’t invited me into their orbit. Sorry your social climbing scheme hasn’t worked. If you didn’t have a lot of rich outgoing friends before your kid went to private school — via your neighborhood, career, country club, college and private school alum network, travel sport circuit, church or synagogue — why would you have them now? You have nothing in common, you don’t speak their language, you don’t know so and so and so and so. And frankly, you’re delusional on what private school provides you as a parent. It doesn’t guarantee any parent some brand new social orbit. And anyone who goes in expecting or fishing for that is pegged a social climbing worm from the get-go.

Translation: I'm a horrible human being who will judge you based on your job, clothes, country club, friends, school. I am one of those moms who will give you my elevator pitch on where I went to college twenty years ago, every job I have had since then, and I'll be sure to let you know how rich I am. I am shallow and don't have much depth as a human being so when I see you don't have value you to me I'll ignore you and pretend you don't exist. But I sure am hell nice to people who I deem rich and worthy and you'll see me pandering and lollygagging around them. So if your neighborhood, career, country club, college and private school alumni network aren't up to mine don't bother talking to me.

Are you new here, sweetie? Welcome to Washington. Don’t act like some babe in the woods when you moved to the most ruthlessly competitive, superficial and status and power obsessed place in the Western Hemisphere. Then chose to send your kid to an even more stratified private school. As for OP, if nobody liked him/her before the kid was in private, why would they magically like them now? Nobody likes a thirsty low born interloper; especially a creepy 30, 40 or 50 something one (we’re a long ways from being teenagers first week of college). If you’re that hard up for a friend, go get a spaniel.

DP. Holy shit are you okay? You sound off the hinges psychotic and mean. Op never said no one disliked them before private. They are saying they want to feel welcome at their kids new private. I suspect you may be part of the group she is referring to and now you feel you need to defend yourself and attack op? Please be a better person.

Context is key. Dislike in this context doesn't mean disliked in general, in life, we are specifically referring to the pedigreed private school parents the striver OP seeks to orbit. The point is if OP is an outsider, not a peer or a mutual i.e. friend of a friend to this network of parents, why would she suddenly become fast friends with them just because her kid goes to school there? It is delusional. It is actually pretty wormy and creepy to think or hope that your kid's new school gives you a new group of higher status friends. And if OP's obsessed enough to make a thread crying about it, it certainly projects in real life, which makes her seem transparently pushy and sketchy to the very people she seeks to orbit. You only get one first impression, you know. Rich and powerful are pretty guarded. In Washington, you could be Project Veritas or some foreign spook for all they know. Or just a low born waste of their time. Sorry, only so many hours in a day.

I prefer to be a "low born waste of time." My relationships are real and I never worry that someone likes me because of some arbitrary external characteristic.

I assume you are intentionally misreading OP's original post in order to make yourself feel better. Is that because you know others only care about you because of your status? Or just because reading comprehension is not your thing?

Please get therapy.

The rest of us are busy building quality communities for our children through respecting each other and our differences.

We all know why OP craves to make fast friends with private school privates. For superficial, social climbing reasons. Private parents are seen as wealthier, more powerful, members of clubs, and more connected. So who's really the shallow one? It's not the parents at the school living their life, it's OP for even having this scheme in the first place. Most parents are too busy with life, too busy with their career, obsessing over making new friends at their kid's new school is not on their radar. When it is on your radar, as OP admits, it's weird and creepy. No surprise if parents at the new school see right through that. And if you've gone 40 something years without this caliber of friend group, what makes you entitled to it now? It's frankly delusional.

Please get help. I beg of you for your kids sake. Op never said she was looking for friends. For gods sakes. She just said she would like to meet some friendly fellow parents and feel welcomed into her kids new school. Please get help and I am so concerned for your kids.

You mean that previous post wasn’t satire? Pls tell me it was satire.

No it isn't. She actually talks like this in person after a few glasses of wine. She is demented and possibly borderline psychotic. She thinks she has arrived because she finally got into the country club she wanted to. I worry for her kids because there is something terribly wrong with her.

This. There are a few people that use these actual words and love the phrase striver and speak this way very publicly. I wish they would stop posting for their kids sake because their language is very identifiable. The thing is neither of them present as being elite in person. They present as being sort of trashy and lower class. I don't know what their background is but it does not seem to make a difference in how they appear upon meeting them as they seem lower class in the way they conduct themselves and their language so I don't know why they are judging others as not being in their caliber because they are anything but elite.

I would rather have lunch with the OP any day of the week and I can attest my other DC private school parent friends would as well. BTW we are multi millionaires and are friendly to all families in our grade and consider everyone to be equals.

It’s not about being equals or thinking you’re better than anyone. It’s just not being hard up to make new friends if you’re not new to the area. When someone is middle aged and thirsty to make friends and “network” at a private school, it’s not only tacky, it reeks of inauthentic and wormy interloper. You’re not already friends or friends of friends with these people (prior to attending) because you have nothing in common. Your kid going to their kids’ school doesn’t really change that. And a lot of tight parent groups at private schools are people who’ve known each other for decades; kids are lifer legacies, they play the same travel sports, parents live in the same neighborhoods, work along side each other, many attended the same handful of colleges. A brand new rando is unlikely to penetrate that orbit unless you’re brand new to the region and have some status. If you’re not new to the area, everyone will rightfully assume you’ve been socially sorted.

“Socially sorted?” Is this a joke? Please get some help and get it fast. You sound unstable to the point that I am now worried for you and your family.

Yes agree. Sounds like they are on the verge of having a complete psychotic break. Something is very off with their posts.

I find the delulu poster totally entertaining. I didn’t know that this subtext existed at (maybe my kid’s???) Big 3/5 or whatever. If the poster is for real, they are in a circle of hell of their own making. Or they are a troll - which would be disappointing. Lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:and I don't know what to do about it. It is a great school but I am miserable.My kids seem happy and that its what matters. I am miserable

Cool outgoing rich parents come to you. They size you up pretty quickly and invite you into their circle if they deem you a peer. They can glance at your LinkedIn and Facebook for 30 seconds to see the friends you have in common, where you went to college, where you work, and where you live. Zillow stalking takes another 30 seconds. I'm afraid they don't see you as being on their level. But it sounds like your kids are having better luck and that's what it's all about, right?

I think “cool outgoing” parents is seriously subjective here. I don’t think you and I would agree as to who is “cool”, muffy. The 1980s called and they want their weird old classist biddies back. Go golf or something.

[Anonymous]

At my kids elementary school there was a group of moms who were very cliquey and would make comments to me (if they spoke to me) about how they never saw me at the school because I worked all the time, didn't know my kid had a mom (haha joking) or other similar things, also would walk right past/stare right through, but what I realized after a while was: i) this was the group that ran everything so were very visible but only made up like 10% of the moms, ii) the comments/exclusion wasn't personal to me it was wrapped up in their own world/insecurities, and iii) when in doubt of who to talk to at an event and really stressed at standing alone. I would just walk up to a random dad standing by himself (dad's are rarely in the loop and many wives leave them for hte clieque at the school events) and just ask a few questions to make conversation until I could make an exit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:and I don't know what to do about it. It is a great school but I am miserable.My kids seem happy and that its what matters. I am miserable

Translation: I’m a striver and the rich cool parents haven’t invited me into their orbit. Sorry your social climbing scheme hasn’t worked. If you didn’t have a lot of rich outgoing friends before your kid went to private school — via your neighborhood, career, country club, college and private school alum network, travel sport circuit, church or synagogue — why would you have them now? You have nothing in common, you don’t speak their language, you don’t know so and so and so and so. And frankly, you’re delusional on what private school provides you as a parent. It doesn’t guarantee any parent some brand new social orbit. And anyone who goes in expecting or fishing for that is pegged a social climbing worm from the get-go.

Translation: I'm a horrible human being who will judge you based on your job, clothes, country club, friends, school. I am one of those moms who will give you my elevator pitch on where I went to college twenty years ago, every job I have had since then, and I'll be sure to let you know how rich I am. I am shallow and don't have much depth as a human being so when I see you don't have value you to me I'll ignore you and pretend you don't exist. But I sure am hell nice to people who I deem rich and worthy and you'll see me pandering and lollygagging around them. So if your neighborhood, career, country club, college and private school alumni network aren't up to mine don't bother talking to me.

Are you new here, sweetie? Welcome to Washington. Don’t act like some babe in the woods when you moved to the most ruthlessly competitive, superficial and status and power obsessed place in the Western Hemisphere. Then chose to send your kid to an even more stratified private school. As for OP, if nobody liked him/her before the kid was in private, why would they magically like them now? Nobody likes a thirsty low born interloper; especially a creepy 30, 40 or 50 something one (we’re a long ways from being teenagers first week of college). If you’re that hard up for a friend, go get a spaniel.

DP. Holy shit are you okay? You sound off the hinges psychotic and mean. Op never said no one disliked them before private. They are saying they want to feel welcome at their kids new private. I suspect you may be part of the group she is referring to and now you feel you need to defend yourself and attack op? Please be a better person.

Context is key. Dislike in this context doesn't mean disliked in general, in life, we are specifically referring to the pedigreed private school parents the striver OP seeks to orbit. The point is if OP is an outsider, not a peer or a mutual i.e. friend of a friend to this network of parents, why would she suddenly become fast friends with them just because her kid goes to school there? It is delusional. It is actually pretty wormy and creepy to think or hope that your kid's new school gives you a new group of higher status friends. And if OP's obsessed enough to make a thread crying about it, it certainly projects in real life, which makes her seem transparently pushy and sketchy to the very people she seeks to orbit. You only get one first impression, you know. Rich and powerful are pretty guarded. In Washington, you could be Project Veritas or some foreign spook for all they know. Or just a low born waste of their time. Sorry, only so many hours in a day.

I prefer to be a "low born waste of time." My relationships are real and I never worry that someone likes me because of some arbitrary external characteristic.

I assume you are intentionally misreading OP's original post in order to make yourself feel better. Is that because you know others only care about you because of your status? Or just because reading comprehension is not your thing?

Please get therapy.

The rest of us are busy building quality communities for our children through respecting each other and our differences.

We all know why OP craves to make fast friends with private school privates. For superficial, social climbing reasons. Private parents are seen as wealthier, more powerful, members of clubs, and more connected. So who's really the shallow one? It's not the parents at the school living their life, it's OP for even having this scheme in the first place. Most parents are too busy with life, too busy with their career, obsessing over making new friends at their kid's new school is not on their radar. When it is on your radar, as OP admits, it's weird and creepy. No surprise if parents at the new school see right through that. And if you've gone 40 something years without this caliber of friend group, what makes you entitled to it now? It's frankly delusional.

Please get help. I beg of you for your kids sake. Op never said she was looking for friends. For gods sakes. She just said she would like to meet some friendly fellow parents and feel welcomed into her kids new school. Please get help and I am so concerned for your kids.

You mean that previous post wasn’t satire? Pls tell me it was satire.

No it isn't. She actually talks like this in person after a few glasses of wine. She is demented and possibly borderline psychotic. She thinks she has arrived because she finally got into the country club she wanted to. I worry for her kids because there is something terribly wrong with her.

This. There are a few people that use these actual words and love the phrase striver and speak this way very publicly. I wish they would stop posting for their kids sake because their language is very identifiable. The thing is neither of them present as being elite in person. They present as being sort of trashy and lower class. I don't know what their background is but it does not seem to make a difference in how they appear upon meeting them as they seem lower class in the way they conduct themselves and their language so I don't know why they are judging others as not being in their caliber because they are anything but elite.

I would rather have lunch with the OP any day of the week and I can attest my other DC private school parent friends would as well. BTW we are multi millionaires and are friendly to all families in our grade and consider everyone to be equals.

It’s not about being equals or thinking you’re better than anyone. It’s just not being hard up to make new friends if you’re not new to the area. When someone is middle aged and thirsty to make friends and “network” at a private school, it’s not only tacky, it reeks of inauthentic and wormy interloper. You’re not already friends or friends of friends with these people (prior to attending) because you have nothing in common. Your kid going to their kids’ school doesn’t really change that. And a lot of tight parent groups at private schools are people who’ve known each other for decades; kids are lifer legacies, they play the same travel sports, parents live in the same neighborhoods, work along side each other, many attended the same handful of colleges. A brand new rando is unlikely to penetrate that orbit unless you’re brand new to the region and have some status. If you’re not new to the area, everyone will rightfully assume you’ve been socially sorted.

“Socially sorted?” Is this a joke? Please get some help and get it fast. You sound unstable to the point that I am now worried for you and your family.

Yes agree. Sounds like they are on the verge of having a complete psychotic break. Something is very off with their posts.

I find the delulu poster totally entertaining. I didn’t know that this subtext existed at (maybe my kid’s???) Big 3/5 or whatever. If the poster is for real, they are in a circle of hell of their own making. Or they are a troll - which would be disappointing. Lol.

"Delulu" That made me laugh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At my kids elementary school there was a group of moms who were very cliquey and would make comments to me (if they spoke to me) about how they never saw me at the school because I worked all the time, didn't know my kid had a mom (haha joking) or other similar things, also would walk right past/stare right through, but what I realized after a while was: i) this was the group that ran everything so were very visible but only made up like 10% of the moms, ii) the comments/exclusion wasn't personal to me it was wrapped up in their own world/insecurities, and iii) when in doubt of who to talk to at an event and really stressed at standing alone. I would just walk up to a random dad standing by himself (dad's are rarely in the loop and many wives leave them for hte clieque at the school events) and just ask a few questions to make conversation until I could make an exit.

This has to be one of two elementary schools. No other schools have these types in such large numbers. That’s the issue admitting these types in large numbers then putting them on the board.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you’ve been in the area for 10 plus years and we don’t either already know each other or have several mutual acquaintances, I’m frankly not interested in a new friend. Nothing personal. And if you act pushy and elbowy, I’ll cease even acknowledging you with smiles and nods at pickup and matches. Back off.

Do you stand by these comments when your name is revealed and publicly announced with all of your shitty comments?

[Anonymous]

I read this thread with a morbid fascination. I have always tried to include and welcome other people without strings or judgments, whether it was when I was a kid in high school asking the lone girl sitting outside if she wanted to join us, or when I chased down all the parents to invite them to join Girl Scouts to make sure it wasn't cliquish like the older troops (by the way, my troop has the loveliest vibe). We have a HHI of 1 million and could certainly afford private school, but I guess I've always intuited that I wouldn't find "my people" there. I don't want to be around people who are concerned with striving, sorting themselves, etc. I just want to be part of a community that values everyone. We recently made some good friends who were new to the area and whose daughter joined our troop. Sure, we already have a nice group of friends but it's always nice "make new friends but keep the old." Surely another friend or two will not cause your entire world to collapse. But then, just being open and wanting to connect with others is a whole different paradigm than getting off on your connections and standing.

[Anonymous]

Wow nothing changes at these schools.

[Anonymous]

this is an interesting chain because the op does not share any details such as how old her kids are, how long they have been at the school, if she works or sahm or somewhere in between, if she is married or single/divorced, etc. and people load their own impressions/experiences.

i would say some of the seemingly distant people are some combination of busy and shy and you may get to know them better over time. you might also have your kids participate in some kind of neighborhood sport or activity where you can meet and chat with parents of same age kids who arent from your particular school community. you notice this particular group of very involved, presumably wealthy, they all socialize together families and you feel left out of it but you probably also arent fully or accurately seeing everyone else in the school community (the less involved parents, the crazy busy working parents, the single parents).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At my kids elementary school there was a group of moms who were very cliquey and would make comments to me (if they spoke to me) about how they never saw me at the school because I worked all the time, didn't know my kid had a mom (haha joking) or other similar things, also would walk right past/stare right through, but what I realized after a while was: i) this was the group that ran everything so were very visible but only made up like 10% of the moms, ii) the comments/exclusion wasn't personal to me it was wrapped up in their own world/insecurities, and iii) when in doubt of who to talk to at an event and really stressed at standing alone. I would just walk up to a random dad standing by himself (dad's are rarely in the loop and many wives leave them for hte clieque at the school events) and just ask a few questions to make conversation until I could make an exit.

This has to be one of two elementary schools. No other schools have these types in such large numbers. That’s the issue admitting these types in large numbers then putting them on the board.

Wait, which two elementary schools? In FCPS?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At my kids elementary school there was a group of moms who were very cliquey and would make comments to me (if they spoke to me) about how they never saw me at the school because I worked all the time, didn't know my kid had a mom (haha joking) or other similar things, also would walk right past/stare right through, but what I realized after a while was: i) this was the group that ran everything so were very visible but only made up like 10% of the moms, ii) the comments/exclusion wasn't personal to me it was wrapped up in their own world/insecurities, and iii) when in doubt of who to talk to at an event and really stressed at standing alone. I would just walk up to a random dad standing by himself (dad's are rarely in the loop and many wives leave them for hte clieque at the school events) and just ask a few questions to make conversation until I could make an exit.

This has to be one of two elementary schools. No other schools have these types in such large numbers. That’s the issue admitting these types in large numbers then putting them on the board.

Wait, which two elementary schools? In FCPS?

What is FCPS? Isn't that a public school? This is a private school thread so doubtful. My guess is one of two schools in DC.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you’ve been in the area for 10 plus years and we don’t either already know each other or have several mutual acquaintances, I’m frankly not interested in a new friend. Nothing personal. And if you act pushy and elbowy, I’ll cease even acknowledging you with smiles and nods at pickup and matches. Back off.

Do you stand by these comments when your name is revealed and publicly announced with all of your shitty comments?

**Pops popcorn**