If you were beaten as a child….

Anonymous
Kids are people and sometimes people are evil.
Anonymous
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Anonymous wrote:If you believe spanking is fine but feel the need to refer to it as "tapping" (I was spanked, no one ever "tapped" my butt -- they were hitting me), ask yourself why you feel the need to use an inaccurate euphemism to describe this thing you think is totally fine.

Spanking is hitting. If you spank, you are hitting your kids. You are using your hand or another object to strike your child. If you don't spank but you think it's okay if others do, you are saying it's okay for people to hit their kids.

I just think we should be very clear about what we are talking about. You don't get to advocate for spanking and then make it sound like a gentle caress. Spanking is hitting. If you want to defend spanking, you need to be willing to defend hitting kids.

Go ahead.


Different person. I spank and I don't care what you think. No one even knows I do.





Your kids know and they'll never forget it.


Are you an idiot? Several people on this thread have verified they were spanked and they love their parents.




I'm one of those people who was "spanked" and loved my parents. They were abusive at times and loving at times. Very confusing. What I'm not confused about is the fact that you are an abusive person. Look at your word choice in a thread written by someone who specified "being beaten in childhood". This question was posted for adults who were beaten in childhood, not for abusive people who continue the cycle of abuse. Piss. Off.


You are an idiot. Your experience is not my experience. I was not confused by it in the least bit. I also was never beaten. Bending over on someone's lap is not being beaten.


DP here… that pp was correct. You are an abusive person.


Seriously, then half the world is.


Now you’re on to something! Why do you think humans cause so much suffering in the world?


All because of spanking? Seriously, there are many other things that are causing suffering. I get what you're saying but spanking is not the leading cause of suffering in this world. If I spank my kids 3 times over the course of their childhood somehow that makes me an abuser? That's fine if you think so. CPS does not think so.


All because of trauma. One of which is definitely being beaten as a child.

This is so obvious and clear to so many of us that it is actually shocking to see so much confusion regarding this sort of cause/effect. Don’t you see how violent places like Afghanistan are? Culturally ingrained violence? Why is this not clearly related to how they treat their children?
Anonymous
If you hit your kid, you are a broken person.

You are a piece of sht.

End of story.
Anonymous
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Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Here’s the deal. I am Black American. In my “culture” spankings and beatings are the norm. I still do not do it and know it is wrong. I was spanked and don’t want that for my kids. I don’t care that it is acceptable in other cultures. Female genitalia mutilation is acceptable in some cultures, but we are pretty comfortable blanket deciding that practice is wrong right? What about child brides? Some cultures find that practice acceptable. IMO this is an issue where there is a clear right side and wrong side.


Would you hit an adult who defies you or pisses you off in some way? And have that be an acceptable course of action with that person where they would be expected to continue having a normal relationship with you after being hit? If it is not ok, why are you claiming it is acceptable in any way to beat kids?


Oh please. Would you take a toy from an adult as punishment. Would you ask an adult to sit in a corner for a few minutes as punishment? Would you call an adult's mother if they misbehave at work?

I don't spank, but this rationale of treating kids as adults would categorize most forms of punishment as wrong.


It would depend on the cognitive capacities of the adult. If an adult I was in charge of caring for was using his toy to hit people or something I would absolutely take it away.


Exactly. Kids don't have the cognitive ability to be treated as adults. There are arguments against spanking but this " if it's not ok with an adult, the why do it with kids? " argument is weak sauce because kids are not adults.


Exactly. But many of these new methods think consequences are wrong. Which is wild.


Nobody is saying that consequences are wrong. Nobody. Where do you guys come up with such nonsense?

It’s like you just cannot convince a person who hits children that the alternative is not chaos and anarchy. They cannot fathom a parent who can controll their kid any other way.
s

Seriously, there is a lot of guidance by psychologists that talking it out is better. I'm not saying it's right, but many of my friends don't believe it's right to have consequences for children. Spanking is wrong (ok sure makes sense), taking privileges away is wrong, have consequences doesn't help. So all I hear is to talk nicely and show empathy. I just don't understand how that leads to a respect for authority.


NP here.

You’re right that a lot of parents are way too permissive and don’t know how to set appropriate boundaries with their kids. But actually parents who spank can sometimes be like that too, and it’s not a new thing. It has always been the case that some parents don’t have the skills to be anything other than permissive.

For me, a respect for authority is not the goal. I want my kids to respect people, not authority (and anybody, authority figures included, can be undeserving of respect).

I am trying to focus on teaching my kids to regulate their emotions, to understand that their behavior has consequences for others, that it’s unacceptable to hurt others, and that they need to take accountability for their actions and the impacts of their actions. It’s hard to get there, but I just try to be firm and enforce boundaries while still being respectful. I don’t try to protect their feelings at the expense of important life lessons; their negative feelings are okay and can be useful.

Anyway, this is all really hard and it’s what I go for. And I’m so focused on that that it never crossed my mind to spank.


It's sad parents don't teach respect for authority. This is why kids are disrespectful to teachers, police officers, principals. Disgusting. And we wonder why crazy stuff is happening in the news.


Really? I’d rather have my kids be like the founding fathers who rebelled against their king because of taxes than like somebody who just blindly does what they’re told just because somebody had been endowed with authority.

Like I said, I want my kids to respect *people.* This includes authority figures. I would not be okay with my kid refusing to follow a teachers instructions to line up quietly , for instance. But I would also not want my kid to assume that you should always do what you’re told to do by a person in a position of power.


NP. You can respect people and not blindly follow. This statement is super ignorant.


DP It seems to me like the two of you agree that respect is good and blind obedience is bad. No need to be hostile.


Yes, but as a teacher I hate parents that believe they should not teach kids to respect authority. It makes our job so impossibly hard.


Real power is earned and not given based on job title or rank. That is a universal fact among human beings.


This is an odd statement considering for how long in human history power was based on physical dominance. Now that we are moving away from that, we need other ways to define power. Being the teacher in a classroom, is one way.


I don’t think you understand history very well. Hitler was not a big strong man. Neither was Napolean, or Kim Jong or Stalin or….

Power comes from persuasion, not brute strength.


Ummm without the physical part what did he really have though? You sound stupid.


9 out of 10 grown men could have easily whipped Hitler’s butt in a physical confrontation. Real power does not depend on being physically stronger.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:If you hit your kid, you are a broken person.

You are a piece of sht.

End of story.


+100
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
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Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If you believe spanking is fine but feel the need to refer to it as "tapping" (I was spanked, no one ever "tapped" my butt -- they were hitting me), ask yourself why you feel the need to use an inaccurate euphemism to describe this thing you think is totally fine.

Spanking is hitting. If you spank, you are hitting your kids. You are using your hand or another object to strike your child. If you don't spank but you think it's okay if others do, you are saying it's okay for people to hit their kids.

I just think we should be very clear about what we are talking about. You don't get to advocate for spanking and then make it sound like a gentle caress. Spanking is hitting. If you want to defend spanking, you need to be willing to defend hitting kids.

Go ahead.


Different person. I spank and I don't care what you think. No one even knows I do.





Your kids know and they'll never forget it.


Are you an idiot? Several people on this thread have verified they were spanked and they love their parents.




I'm one of those people who was "spanked" and loved my parents. They were abusive at times and loving at times. Very confusing. What I'm not confused about is the fact that you are an abusive person. Look at your word choice in a thread written by someone who specified "being beaten in childhood". This question was posted for adults who were beaten in childhood, not for abusive people who continue the cycle of abuse. Piss. Off.


You are an idiot. Your experience is not my experience. I was not confused by it in the least bit. I also was never beaten. Bending over on someone's lap is not being beaten.


DP here… that pp was correct. You are an abusive person.


Seriously, then half the world is.


Now you’re on to something! Why do you think humans cause so much suffering in the world?


All because of spanking? Seriously, there are many other things that are causing suffering. I get what you're saying but spanking is not the leading cause of suffering in this world. If I spank my kids 3 times over the course of their childhood somehow that makes me an abuser? That's fine if you think so. CPS does not think so.


All because of trauma. One of which is definitely being beaten as a child.

This is so obvious and clear to so many of us that it is actually shocking to see so much confusion regarding this sort of cause/effect. Don’t you see how violent places like Afghanistan are? Culturally ingrained violence? Why is this not clearly related to how they treat their children?


So killing is the same as spanking. Ok. If it were it would be illegal. Come on. I don't spank but this is an extreme view. I am also pro-life and have a view that many would not agree with...
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:If you hit your kid, you are a broken person.

You are a piece of sht.

End of story.




+ 1 It really is that simple.
Anonymous
For all of you endorsing hitting/spanking/tapping/whatever you call it, how long did/do you intend to spank your children? What age do you intend to stop and why at that age?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If you believe spanking is fine but feel the need to refer to it as "tapping" (I was spanked, no one ever "tapped" my butt -- they were hitting me), ask yourself why you feel the need to use an inaccurate euphemism to describe this thing you think is totally fine.

Spanking is hitting. If you spank, you are hitting your kids. You are using your hand or another object to strike your child. If you don't spank but you think it's okay if others do, you are saying it's okay for people to hit their kids.

I just think we should be very clear about what we are talking about. You don't get to advocate for spanking and then make it sound like a gentle caress. Spanking is hitting. If you want to defend spanking, you need to be willing to defend hitting kids.

Go ahead.


Different person. I spank and I don't care what you think. No one even knows I do.





Your kids know and they'll never forget it.


Are you an idiot? Several people on this thread have verified they were spanked and they love their parents.




I'm one of those people who was "spanked" and loved my parents. They were abusive at times and loving at times. Very confusing. What I'm not confused about is the fact that you are an abusive person. Look at your word choice in a thread written by someone who specified "being beaten in childhood". This question was posted for adults who were beaten in childhood, not for abusive people who continue the cycle of abuse. Piss. Off.


You are an idiot. Your experience is not my experience. I was not confused by it in the least bit. I also was never beaten. Bending over on someone's lap is not being beaten.


DP here… that pp was correct. You are an abusive person.


Seriously, then half the world is.


Now you’re on to something! Why do you think humans cause so much suffering in the world?


All because of spanking? Seriously, there are many other things that are causing suffering. I get what you're saying but spanking is not the leading cause of suffering in this world. If I spank my kids 3 times over the course of their childhood somehow that makes me an abuser? That's fine if you think so. CPS does not think so.


All because of trauma. One of which is definitely being beaten as a child.

This is so obvious and clear to so many of us that it is actually shocking to see so much confusion regarding this sort of cause/effect. Don’t you see how violent places like Afghanistan are? Culturally ingrained violence? Why is this not clearly related to how they treat their children?


So killing is the same as spanking. Ok. If it were it would be illegal. Come on. I don't spank but this is an extreme view. I am also pro-life and have a view that many would not agree with...


If you can’t see a direct line from being abused as a child to being an abusive and violent adult then you are beyond reason. No, that is not an “extreme” view.
Anonymous
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Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
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Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Here’s the deal. I am Black American. In my “culture” spankings and beatings are the norm. I still do not do it and know it is wrong. I was spanked and don’t want that for my kids. I don’t care that it is acceptable in other cultures. Female genitalia mutilation is acceptable in some cultures, but we are pretty comfortable blanket deciding that practice is wrong right? What about child brides? Some cultures find that practice acceptable. IMO this is an issue where there is a clear right side and wrong side.


Would you hit an adult who defies you or pisses you off in some way? And have that be an acceptable course of action with that person where they would be expected to continue having a normal relationship with you after being hit? If it is not ok, why are you claiming it is acceptable in any way to beat kids?


Oh please. Would you take a toy from an adult as punishment. Would you ask an adult to sit in a corner for a few minutes as punishment? Would you call an adult's mother if they misbehave at work?

I don't spank, but this rationale of treating kids as adults would categorize most forms of punishment as wrong.


It would depend on the cognitive capacities of the adult. If an adult I was in charge of caring for was using his toy to hit people or something I would absolutely take it away.


Exactly. Kids don't have the cognitive ability to be treated as adults. There are arguments against spanking but this " if it's not ok with an adult, the why do it with kids? " argument is weak sauce because kids are not adults.


Exactly. But many of these new methods think consequences are wrong. Which is wild.


Nobody is saying that consequences are wrong. Nobody. Where do you guys come up with such nonsense?

It’s like you just cannot convince a person who hits children that the alternative is not chaos and anarchy. They cannot fathom a parent who can controll their kid any other way.
s

Seriously, there is a lot of guidance by psychologists that talking it out is better. I'm not saying it's right, but many of my friends don't believe it's right to have consequences for children. Spanking is wrong (ok sure makes sense), taking privileges away is wrong, have consequences doesn't help. So all I hear is to talk nicely and show empathy. I just don't understand how that leads to a respect for authority.


NP here.

You’re right that a lot of parents are way too permissive and don’t know how to set appropriate boundaries with their kids. But actually parents who spank can sometimes be like that too, and it’s not a new thing. It has always been the case that some parents don’t have the skills to be anything other than permissive.

For me, a respect for authority is not the goal. I want my kids to respect people, not authority (and anybody, authority figures included, can be undeserving of respect).

I am trying to focus on teaching my kids to regulate their emotions, to understand that their behavior has consequences for others, that it’s unacceptable to hurt others, and that they need to take accountability for their actions and the impacts of their actions. It’s hard to get there, but I just try to be firm and enforce boundaries while still being respectful. I don’t try to protect their feelings at the expense of important life lessons; their negative feelings are okay and can be useful.

Anyway, this is all really hard and it’s what I go for. And I’m so focused on that that it never crossed my mind to spank.


It's sad parents don't teach respect for authority. This is why kids are disrespectful to teachers, police officers, principals. Disgusting. And we wonder why crazy stuff is happening in the news.


Really? I’d rather have my kids be like the founding fathers who rebelled against their king because of taxes than like somebody who just blindly does what they’re told just because somebody had been endowed with authority.

Like I said, I want my kids to respect *people.* This includes authority figures. I would not be okay with my kid refusing to follow a teachers instructions to line up quietly , for instance. But I would also not want my kid to assume that you should always do what you’re told to do by a person in a position of power.


NP. You can respect people and not blindly follow. This statement is super ignorant.


DP It seems to me like the two of you agree that respect is good and blind obedience is bad. No need to be hostile.


Yes, but as a teacher I hate parents that believe they should not teach kids to respect authority. It makes our job so impossibly hard.


Real power is earned and not given based on job title or rank. That is a universal fact among human beings.


This is an odd statement considering for how long in human history power was based on physical dominance. Now that we are moving away from that, we need other ways to define power. Being the teacher in a classroom, is one way.


I don’t think you understand history very well. Hitler was not a big strong man. Neither was Napolean, or Kim Jong or Stalin or….

Power comes from persuasion, not brute strength.


Ummm without the physical part what did he really have though? You sound stupid.


9 out of 10 grown men could have easily whipped Hitler’s butt in a physical confrontation. Real power does not depend on being physically stronger.



Are you one of the pro-spanking people? Do you not understand how messed up it is to invoke Hitler in your quest to explain that children shouldn't have to respect teachers by virtue of being the teacher?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:….how do you manage not repeating this with you own kids?

FTR I don’t hit my kids. But I will admit to sometimes being so filled with rage when they are being especially difficult that I get overwhelmed with the urge to do what I experienced as a kid. I always manage to fight it off but it is hard. Harder than I think it should be.

Anyone else in similar shoes? If you were beaten (whatever your own definition of corporal punishment is and your own line of what’s acceptable) do you have a hard time avoiding a repeat of the past?


I think it's a battle that you have to continue to fight. I had a pretty bad childhood with hitting and emotional abuse. Now, I have a son with ADHD (which can be more trying than what is typical).

One thing that has helped OP, is that I've let things go. I don't need to feel personally affronted because my DS isn't listening/responding to me as an authority figure. I also don't need to solve the primary issue (disobedience, lying, defiance, etc) in the moment. When I make it personal or feel that I need to immediately punish a certain behavior, situations have tended to escalate into anger on both sides, power struggles, and feeling that terrible anxiety/anger/helplessness that I felt as a child.

Real authoritative parenting will come from keeping a positive relationship with your child, teaching them to manage their own emotions, implementing reasonable consequences when everyone is calm and more thoughtful, and maintaining moral authority. You lose the moral high ground when you've lost control of yourself in anger-- your child will repeat your patterns, and they won't respect you.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:For all of you endorsing hitting/spanking/tapping/whatever you call it, how long did/do you intend to spank your children? What age do you intend to stop and why at that age?


In my opinion 5-8 years old but very rarely if at all. I noticed that after 8 there needs to be a longer period of discipline. I also don't think long periods of discipline are necessary for the younger ones.
Anonymous
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Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Here’s the deal. I am Black American. In my “culture” spankings and beatings are the norm. I still do not do it and know it is wrong. I was spanked and don’t want that for my kids. I don’t care that it is acceptable in other cultures. Female genitalia mutilation is acceptable in some cultures, but we are pretty comfortable blanket deciding that practice is wrong right? What about child brides? Some cultures find that practice acceptable. IMO this is an issue where there is a clear right side and wrong side.


Would you hit an adult who defies you or pisses you off in some way? And have that be an acceptable course of action with that person where they would be expected to continue having a normal relationship with you after being hit? If it is not ok, why are you claiming it is acceptable in any way to beat kids?


Oh please. Would you take a toy from an adult as punishment. Would you ask an adult to sit in a corner for a few minutes as punishment? Would you call an adult's mother if they misbehave at work?

I don't spank, but this rationale of treating kids as adults would categorize most forms of punishment as wrong.


It would depend on the cognitive capacities of the adult. If an adult I was in charge of caring for was using his toy to hit people or something I would absolutely take it away.


Exactly. Kids don't have the cognitive ability to be treated as adults. There are arguments against spanking but this " if it's not ok with an adult, the why do it with kids? " argument is weak sauce because kids are not adults.


Exactly. But many of these new methods think consequences are wrong. Which is wild.


Nobody is saying that consequences are wrong. Nobody. Where do you guys come up with such nonsense?

It’s like you just cannot convince a person who hits children that the alternative is not chaos and anarchy. They cannot fathom a parent who can controll their kid any other way.
s

Seriously, there is a lot of guidance by psychologists that talking it out is better. I'm not saying it's right, but many of my friends don't believe it's right to have consequences for children. Spanking is wrong (ok sure makes sense), taking privileges away is wrong, have consequences doesn't help. So all I hear is to talk nicely and show empathy. I just don't understand how that leads to a respect for authority.


NP here.

You’re right that a lot of parents are way too permissive and don’t know how to set appropriate boundaries with their kids. But actually parents who spank can sometimes be like that too, and it’s not a new thing. It has always been the case that some parents don’t have the skills to be anything other than permissive.

For me, a respect for authority is not the goal. I want my kids to respect people, not authority (and anybody, authority figures included, can be undeserving of respect).

I am trying to focus on teaching my kids to regulate their emotions, to understand that their behavior has consequences for others, that it’s unacceptable to hurt others, and that they need to take accountability for their actions and the impacts of their actions. It’s hard to get there, but I just try to be firm and enforce boundaries while still being respectful. I don’t try to protect their feelings at the expense of important life lessons; their negative feelings are okay and can be useful.

Anyway, this is all really hard and it’s what I go for. And I’m so focused on that that it never crossed my mind to spank.


It's sad parents don't teach respect for authority. This is why kids are disrespectful to teachers, police officers, principals. Disgusting. And we wonder why crazy stuff is happening in the news.


Really? I’d rather have my kids be like the founding fathers who rebelled against their king because of taxes than like somebody who just blindly does what they’re told just because somebody had been endowed with authority.

Like I said, I want my kids to respect *people.* This includes authority figures. I would not be okay with my kid refusing to follow a teachers instructions to line up quietly , for instance. But I would also not want my kid to assume that you should always do what you’re told to do by a person in a position of power.


NP. You can respect people and not blindly follow. This statement is super ignorant.


DP It seems to me like the two of you agree that respect is good and blind obedience is bad. No need to be hostile.


Yes, but as a teacher I hate parents that believe they should not teach kids to respect authority. It makes our job so impossibly hard.


Real power is earned and not given based on job title or rank. That is a universal fact among human beings.


This is an odd statement considering for how long in human history power was based on physical dominance. Now that we are moving away from that, we need other ways to define power. Being the teacher in a classroom, is one way.


I don’t think you understand history very well. Hitler was not a big strong man. Neither was Napolean, or Kim Jong or Stalin or….

Power comes from persuasion, not brute strength.


Ummm without the physical part what did he really have though? You sound stupid.


9 out of 10 grown men could have easily whipped Hitler’s butt in a physical confrontation. Real power does not depend on being physically stronger.



Are you one of the pro-spanking people? Do you not understand how messed up it is to invoke Hitler in your quest to explain that children shouldn't have to respect teachers by virtue of being the teacher?


The actual point that physical strength /= right seems to have flown over your head.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If you believe spanking is fine but feel the need to refer to it as "tapping" (I was spanked, no one ever "tapped" my butt -- they were hitting me), ask yourself why you feel the need to use an inaccurate euphemism to describe this thing you think is totally fine.

Spanking is hitting. If you spank, you are hitting your kids. You are using your hand or another object to strike your child. If you don't spank but you think it's okay if others do, you are saying it's okay for people to hit their kids.

I just think we should be very clear about what we are talking about. You don't get to advocate for spanking and then make it sound like a gentle caress. Spanking is hitting. If you want to defend spanking, you need to be willing to defend hitting kids.

Go ahead.


Different person. I spank and I don't care what you think. No one even knows I do.





Your kids know and they'll never forget it.


Are you an idiot? Several people on this thread have verified they were spanked and they love their parents.




I'm one of those people who was "spanked" and loved my parents. They were abusive at times and loving at times. Very confusing. What I'm not confused about is the fact that you are an abusive person. Look at your word choice in a thread written by someone who specified "being beaten in childhood". This question was posted for adults who were beaten in childhood, not for abusive people who continue the cycle of abuse. Piss. Off.


You are an idiot. Your experience is not my experience. I was not confused by it in the least bit. I also was never beaten. Bending over on someone's lap is not being beaten.


DP here… that pp was correct. You are an abusive person.


Seriously, then half the world is.


Now you’re on to something! Why do you think humans cause so much suffering in the world?


All because of spanking? Seriously, there are many other things that are causing suffering. I get what you're saying but spanking is not the leading cause of suffering in this world. If I spank my kids 3 times over the course of their childhood somehow that makes me an abuser? That's fine if you think so. CPS does not think so.


All because of trauma. One of which is definitely being beaten as a child.

This is so obvious and clear to so many of us that it is actually shocking to see so much confusion regarding this sort of cause/effect. Don’t you see how violent places like Afghanistan are? Culturally ingrained violence? Why is this not clearly related to how they treat their children?



So killing is the same as spanking. Ok. If it were it would be illegal. Come on. I don't spank but this is an extreme view. I am also pro-life and have a view that many would not agree with...


If you can’t see a direct line from being abused as a child to being an abusive and violent adult then you are beyond reason. No, that is not an “extreme” view.


I'm with you but what about the millions of people that were spanked and are not violent. Nobody is addressing that. My friends that were spanked and spank now aren't violent. This is very extreme to me.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If you believe spanking is fine but feel the need to refer to it as "tapping" (I was spanked, no one ever "tapped" my butt -- they were hitting me), ask yourself why you feel the need to use an inaccurate euphemism to describe this thing you think is totally fine.

Spanking is hitting. If you spank, you are hitting your kids. You are using your hand or another object to strike your child. If you don't spank but you think it's okay if others do, you are saying it's okay for people to hit their kids.

I just think we should be very clear about what we are talking about. You don't get to advocate for spanking and then make it sound like a gentle caress. Spanking is hitting. If you want to defend spanking, you need to be willing to defend hitting kids.

Go ahead.


Different person. I spank and I don't care what you think. No one even knows I do.





Your kids know and they'll never forget it.


Are you an idiot? Several people on this thread have verified they were spanked and they love their parents.




I'm one of those people who was "spanked" and loved my parents. They were abusive at times and loving at times. Very confusing. What I'm not confused about is the fact that you are an abusive person. Look at your word choice in a thread written by someone who specified "being beaten in childhood". This question was posted for adults who were beaten in childhood, not for abusive people who continue the cycle of abuse. Piss. Off.


You are an idiot. Your experience is not my experience. I was not confused by it in the least bit. I also was never beaten. Bending over on someone's lap is not being beaten.


DP here… that pp was correct. You are an abusive person.


Seriously, then half the world is.


Now you’re on to something! Why do you think humans cause so much suffering in the world?


All because of spanking? Seriously, there are many other things that are causing suffering. I get what you're saying but spanking is not the leading cause of suffering in this world. If I spank my kids 3 times over the course of their childhood somehow that makes me an abuser? That's fine if you think so. CPS does not think so.


All because of trauma. One of which is definitely being beaten as a child.

This is so obvious and clear to so many of us that it is actually shocking to see so much confusion regarding this sort of cause/effect. Don’t you see how violent places like Afghanistan are? Culturally ingrained violence? Why is this not clearly related to how they treat their children?


So killing is the same as spanking. Ok. If it were it would be illegal. Come on. I don't spank but this is an extreme view. I am also pro-life and have a view that many would not agree with...


If you can’t see a direct line from being abused as a child to being an abusive and violent adult then you are beyond reason. No, that is not an “extreme” view.


Bending a child on your knee is violent. I've worked as a social worker and we would not say that this is violent abuse.
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