DD's teacher won't call her by her nickname

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Every teacher I ever had, form pre-K to university, always asked student what they preferred to go by and then called them that.

Strange that this teacher wouldn't do this. Seems like a pretty easy thing to just call the kid the nickname she prefers.

It may SEEM like that, but in reality, it encourages favoritism, informality, and entitlement. More importantly, that's not what they did on Leave It To Beaver.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So if your name is James, and your nickname is Jim, and you want people to call you Jim, that makes you an entitled idiot...?

There must surely be only one nickname-hating poster on this thread? I have certainly never met anybody with a similar attitude in real life.

Yes, yes it does.

To ask people to call you Jim is one thing, but to insist on it and be offended when people don't call you Jim is a whole different thing.

Well, now I have another question. Let's say that your name is Siobhan. There it is, Siobhan, in black and white, on your birth certificate. Pronounced Shi-VAWN. Are you also an entitled idiot if you get upset when you ask people to call you Siobhan pronounced Shi-VAWN, but they insist on calling you SEE-oh-ban? Or Joan, which is Siobhan in English?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So if your name is James, and your nickname is Jim, and you want people to call you Jim, that makes you an entitled idiot...?

There must surely be only one nickname-hating poster on this thread? I have certainly never met anybody with a similar attitude in real life.

Yes, yes it does.

To ask people to call you Jim is one thing, but to insist on it and be offended when people don't call you Jim is a whole different thing.

And what does it make you if you're a person who refuses to call him Jim when he asks you to? We're not talking about making a mistake here. We're talking about taking a principled stand that he MUST be called JAMES, dammit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is it so hard to grasp that if you named your kid Isabella that people will actually call her ISABELLA!!!!! GOOD GOD!!!! Name her what you want her to be called.

A friend of mine is named James Henry. His parents called him Hank from the day he was born. When he came to school and the roster was called he didn't answer to "James" because he was never called that. Is that the teacher's fault. I DON'T think so! NAME YOUR KIDS WHAT YOU WANT THEM TO BE CALLED.

That's actually quite simple to grasp. What I find hard to grasp is that if your kid's nickname is Bella, and you ask the teacher to call the kid Bella, and the kid asks the teacher to call the kid Bella, people would nonetheless purposely insist on calling the kid Isabella.

Apparently it is not easy to grasp at all since 14 pages later you still can't grasp it. Let me tell it to you again, if you want your kid called Bella you should have put that on her birth certificate.

And let me tell it to you again, if a person named "James" asks you to call him "Jim", then you should call him Jim. Or you're an asshole.

No, you are the asshole for naming your child something that you didn't want her called and creating a lifetime uphill battle. But I can totally see how you're not going to see my point again.

Oh, honey. I can see your point. Understanding it isn't a problem. It's just that I also see that it's wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So if your name is James, and your nickname is Jim, and you want people to call you Jim, that makes you an entitled idiot...?

There must surely be only one nickname-hating poster on this thread? I have certainly never met anybody with a similar attitude in real life.

Yes, yes it does.

To ask people to call you Jim is one thing, but to insist on it and be offended when people don't call you Jim is a whole different thing.

Well, now I have another question. Let's say that your name is Siobhan. There it is, Siobhan, in black and white, on your birth certificate. Pronounced Shi-VAWN. Are you also an entitled idiot if you get upset when you ask people to call you Siobhan pronounced Shi-VAWN, but they insist on calling you SEE-oh-ban? Or Joan, which is Siobhan in English?

I think this was addressed on like page 2.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is it so hard to grasp that if you named your kid Isabella that people will actually call her ISABELLA!!!!! GOOD GOD!!!! Name her what you want her to be called.

A friend of mine is named James Henry. His parents called him Hank from the day he was born. When he came to school and the roster was called he didn't answer to "James" because he was never called that. Is that the teacher's fault. I DON'T think so! NAME YOUR KIDS WHAT YOU WANT THEM TO BE CALLED.

That's actually quite simple to grasp. What I find hard to grasp is that if your kid's nickname is Bella, and you ask the teacher to call the kid Bella, and the kid asks the teacher to call the kid Bella, people would nonetheless purposely insist on calling the kid Isabella.

Apparently it is not easy to grasp at all since 14 pages later you still can't grasp it. Let me tell it to you again, if you want your kid called Bella you should have put that on her birth certificate.

And let me tell it to you again, if a person named "James" asks you to call him "Jim", then you should call him Jim. Or you're an asshole.

No, you are the asshole for naming your child something that you didn't want her called and creating a lifetime uphill battle. But I can totally see how you're not going to see my point again.

Oh, honey. I can see your point. Understanding it isn't a problem. It's just that I also see that it's wrong.

Yet, I'm not the one asking for help.

[Anonymous]

NP. The poor teacher has to remember all the nicknames as well? I don't think she's paid enough. Get over it LOL

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is it so hard to grasp that if you named your kid Isabella that people will actually call her ISABELLA!!!!! GOOD GOD!!!! Name her what you want her to be called.

A friend of mine is named James Henry. His parents called him Hank from the day he was born. When he came to school and the roster was called he didn't answer to "James" because he was never called that. Is that the teacher's fault. I DON'T think so! NAME YOUR KIDS WHAT YOU WANT THEM TO BE CALLED.

That's actually quite simple to grasp. What I find hard to grasp is that if your kid's nickname is Bella, and you ask the teacher to call the kid Bella, and the kid asks the teacher to call the kid Bella, people would nonetheless purposely insist on calling the kid Isabella.

Apparently it is not easy to grasp at all since 14 pages later you still can't grasp it. Let me tell it to you again, if you want your kid called Bella you should have put that on her birth certificate.

And let me tell it to you again, if a person named "James" asks you to call him "Jim", then you should call him Jim. Or you're an asshole.

No, you are the asshole for naming your child something that you didn't want her called and creating a lifetime uphill battle. But I can totally see how you're not going to see my point again.

Oh, honey. I can see your point. Understanding it isn't a problem. It's just that I also see that it's wrong.

Yet, I'm not the one asking for help.

Nor am I. You're cray-cray.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:NP. The poor teacher has to remember all the nicknames as well? I don't think she's paid enough. Get over it LOL

I bet you're not really a NP. But regardless, no. The teacher actually ONLY has to remember the nicknames. Which are on the same forms that had the "real" names on them. So it's not any harder. If this is too much for her, she really shouldn't be teaching.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:NP. The poor teacher has to remember all the nicknames as well? I don't think she's paid enough. Get over it LOL

Oh, for the love...

What happens is that the teacher barely has to remember the "official" name.

Not to mention that it's not hard to remember that Bella is officially Isabella or vice versa.

Look, I have always gone by my middle name. Always. I was named after my parents (Mom'sFirstName FeminineofDad'sFirstName) and they always called me by my middle, as my first was the same as my mom's. Common Southern thing (mom is from the South).

I was born in the late 70s and attended MCPS from K-12 in the 80s and 90s.

Not one of my teachers ever called me anything but Middle Name after the first day of school. They made a note of it on their attendance sheets-- done. Actually, they often explicitly asked you to tell them, on the first day, if you went by another name, to let them know. I don't remember any kid that went by a nickname/middle name not being called by his/her "unofficial" name.

And I had some jerky teachers (IMO), who were all about rules and regulations and old-school respect and formality. This was never, ever, ever a problem for me. Not once.

If a teacher really clung to the "formal name 'rule,'" I would think there were bigger issues at work. For the teacher.

Not.

That.

Serious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So if your name is James, and your nickname is Jim, and you want people to call you Jim, that makes you an entitled idiot...?

There must surely be only one nickname-hating poster on this thread? I have certainly never met anybody with a similar attitude in real life.

Yes, yes it does.

To ask people to call you Jim is one thing, but to insist on it and be offended when people don't call you Jim is a whole different thing.

Well, now I have another question. Let's say that your name is Siobhan. There it is, Siobhan, in black and white, on your birth certificate. Pronounced Shi-VAWN. Are you also an entitled idiot if you get upset when you ask people to call you Siobhan pronounced Shi-VAWN, but they insist on calling you SEE-oh-ban? Or Joan, which is Siobhan in English?

I think this was addressed on like page 2.

OK, what was the answer? I don't want to go back to like page 2 to look.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you ever hear the Beaver's teacher call him "Beaver". Nope. She called him Theodore. And you didn't see his parents demanding that she cater to their whims.

I have a child who goes by his middle name at home. Even in kindergarten, he was smart enough to answer when his teacher called him by his first name.

Leave It To Beaver was a fictional TV show. True fact.

Yes, but it is reflective of reality. The school I went to growing up had a no nicknames policy. So, Jo was Josephine, Billy was William, Tommy was Thomas, Nancy was Ann. It actually is nice for children to realize that school is a more formal place than the playground, with different behavioral expectations. The use of the more formal form of a child's name helps to create an atmosphere that the classroom is a place for attention and learning.

OMG -- that's awesome. The "I'll call you your formal name regardless of what you want" fascist thinks Leave It To Beaver is "reflective of reality". You win the internet today!

The reality is that school is a more formal place than the playground. A teacher who is setting up a classroom where she is teaching children to treat each other with respect and, yes, a little touch of formality is creating a calm environment for learning. A teacher who is giving her students a sense that the classroom calls for different behavior than the playground is doing her students a favor. A person who has learned at a younger age how to conduct him/herself in formal and business situations will have an advantage later in life

[Anonymous]

Oh, also, I want to know from the "ONLY THE NAME ON THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE MAY BE USED" people (who I suspect is really just one person): what do you do with "Mary Jane". Her name is Mary Jane Smith. She goes by "Mary Jane". She does not go by "Mary". What say you, oh great name determiner? Should the teacher call her "Mary Jane"?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you ever hear the Beaver's teacher call him "Beaver". Nope. She called him Theodore. And you didn't see his parents demanding that she cater to their whims.

I have a child who goes by his middle name at home. Even in kindergarten, he was smart enough to answer when his teacher called him by his first name.

Leave It To Beaver was a fictional TV show. True fact.

Yes, but it is reflective of reality. The school I went to growing up had a no nicknames policy. So, Jo was Josephine, Billy was William, Tommy was Thomas, Nancy was Ann. It actually is nice for children to realize that school is a more formal place than the playground, with different behavioral expectations. The use of the more formal form of a child's name helps to create an atmosphere that the classroom is a place for attention and learning.

OMG -- that's awesome. The "I'll call you your formal name regardless of what you want" fascist thinks Leave It To Beaver is "reflective of reality". You win the internet today!

The reality is that school is a more formal place than the playground. A teacher who is setting up a classroom where she is teaching children to treat each other with respect and, yes, a little touch of formality is creating a calm environment for learning. A teacher who is giving her students a sense that the classroom calls for different behavior than the playground is doing her students a favor. A person who has learned at a younger age how to conduct him/herself in formal and business situations will have an advantage later in life

That's ridiculous. All you're teaching the kid is that teachers make arbitrary, nonsensical decisions that are disrespectful toward kids. If anything, this would make me LESS respectful of authority, not more. And, somehow, being called "Beth" instead of "Elizabeth" even *gasp* in school did not make me a failure in life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

The reality is that school is a more formal place than the playground. A teacher who is setting up a classroom where she is teaching children to treat each other with respect and, yes, a little touch of formality is creating a calm environment for learning. A teacher who is giving her students a sense that the classroom calls for different behavior than the playground is doing her students a favor. A person who has learned at a younger age how to conduct him/herself in formal and business situations will have an advantage later in life

How about a workplace? Is that a more formal place than the playground? I have bosses who call themselves Tom, Debbie, and Dave. Should I insist on calling them Thomas, Deborah, and David?