Party requesting guests to take shoes off

[Anonymous]

We are a no shoes house. However, when we entertain, we do not ask people to remove shoes. I just make sure that the day after when I'm cleaning up the house, floors are thoroughly mopped and vacuumed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, super weird. It’s one thing when it’s close friends or family, but this is a very diverse group of people. Just don’t host OP.

We are also a no shoe house. The kids’ friends, our close friends and family who come often, just remove their shoes on their own now. But when we have a party, I usually wet wipe the common areas / kitchen after guests leave. It’s not that tough unless you have wall to wall carpet.

Agree. We are a shoeless household and close family and friends take off shoes when they are over. But a large and/or formal gathering I would expect shoes to stay on. For one, a giant pile of shoes in the entrance is gross and a tripping hazard and secondly, footwear is part of a more formal outfit. We have all hardwood floors in main areas so I just vacuum and steam mop after larger gatherings.

[Anonymous]

For those that are so adamant about taking off shoes...

how exactly do you think the dirt from shoes is going to make you sick?
Do you eat on the floor? (I know in some cultures they do, so that would make some more sense.) Do you not wash your hands before eating?

Exactly how are you envisioning the grossness from people's shoes getting into your body in a way that won't happen when the shoes are sitting inside but by the door?

(For the record, if I go to OP's house I'll happily take off my shoes and wouldn't really care one way or the other as long as I had warning so as to wear appropriate socks.)

[Anonymous]

I think you should warn people if you're going to ask them to take their shoes off. Most women's shoes that you would wear to a dinner don't go with socks and I would feel odd walking around barefoot (which by the way is kind of gross in someone else's house).

[Anonymous]

It’s a faux pas to ask people to take off their shoes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:After reading this, I live in a no shoes/indoor slippers house and think OP should find a way to be excused from hosting. It's not worth it.

OP here. Yes, I think I will decline hosting. I will just invite kids and families over that we like and are friends with my child.

We host parties with friends and no one seems to mind taking their shoes off.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you’re going to be that anal, just don’t host a formal event.

If you host, things can be broken and items can be stained. Do your best to clean to and move on. Or will you only serve beige food and drink?

I don’t get why you can’t just clean the floors after. It’s such an annoying control freak thing.

Would you be upset if it was a conservative religious family asking people to come with shoulders covered? Or a Muslim or Mormon family that didn't serve alcohol? People are allowed to have different traditions and customs even if you find it weird.

Announce it in the invitation. People who can't bear to be parted from their high heels can decline. Everyone else can bring socks (or, if they have orthotics issue, an appropriate pair of house shoes).

Putting on a shawl to cover your shoulders and taking off your dress shoes and being barefoot are not remotely the same thing.

And who wears socks with a dress?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I have to admit, as a Canadian, American’s requirement to wear shoes inside is completely bizarre to me. It’s another difference that, like circumcision and guns, I feel the complete polarities in our culture. I live minutes from the border so it’s not like the disparity should be so great, but it is.

This is part of why I love DCUM.

Do you know what requirement means?

I have also never been in a Canadian house in which I was asked to remove my shoes (barring the obvious removal of wet or muddy footwear, which shockingly Americans will do as well). Canadian gymnasiums will often have a pile of shoes outside the door, but about half the people inside the gym don’t bother to remove their outdoor footwear, so what’s the point?

Just typical Canadian pretending to be better than Americans while not actually doing a simple task correctly or completely.

Well I already qualified my wording, but I guess you weren’t through enough, like I wouldn’t expect you to be through enough to wipe the sidewalk dog poop off your shoes before walking on my carpets!

And people wearing their shoes in the gym are generally known to be jerks, but we accept them too. It’s rude, and we know who is who.

We’re not better. This is just simple. What do you think you’re catching WEARING SOCKS? This kind of explains why the mask this was so hard for the US and fairly simple for most of the rest of the world.

Thorough, before you leave me as an idiot.

You are one though

Thank you for your thoughtful and well constructed rebuttal. You must have been a force to be reckoned with on debate team.

No but your mom was. Why is a Canadian on this forum?

OMG! It’s almost like DC isn’t an international, metropolitan, and politically significant area that attracts people there for all kinds of reasons!

Are you actually asking why someone from Canada may be on a board from such an area? Or have you only ever been to the vast country suburbs?

You’ve figured me out. I’m infiltrating your secret, password protected, closed door forum with absolutely no advertising interests so I can… shop the best deals at Burger King, seek bobcats, and make sure I get the best advice on how to secure an Egg Roll ticket, okay?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would be so pleased if you didn't attend my party because we are a no-shoe household. It tells me everything I need to know about you as a person.

We keep guest slippers on hand in a separate basket.

Are your guest slippers single-use? Because if not that's disgusting that you expect people to wear shoes that a stranger has worn. Way grosser than letting people leave their shoes on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would be so pleased if you didn't attend my party because we are a no-shoe household. It tells me everything I need to know about you as a person.

We keep guest slippers on hand in a separate basket.

Are your guest slippers single-use? Because if not that's disgusting that you expect people to wear shoes that a stranger has worn. Way grosser than letting people leave their shoes on.

Have you never ever tried on a shoe without a sock? Why is it so gross, are you eating with your feet or something?

[Anonymous]

Or gone barefoot?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:If you’re going to be that anal, just don’t host a formal event.

If you host, things can be broken and items can be stained. Do your best to clean to and move on. Or will you only serve beige food and drink?

I don’t get why you can’t just clean the floors after. It’s such an annoying control freak thing.

Would you be upset if it was a conservative religious family asking people to come with shoulders covered? Or a Muslim or Mormon family that didn't serve alcohol? People are allowed to have different traditions and customs even if you find it weird.

Announce it in the invitation. People who can't bear to be parted from their high heels can decline. Everyone else can bring socks (or, if they have orthotics issue, an appropriate pair of house shoes).

Removing shoes is a little more personal and is related to hygiene.

For a lot of Asians it's cultural. Yes, the origin of the cultural tradition is hygiene, but that doesn't mean it isn't cultural. The origin of a lot of religious food restrictions is health and hygiene, but you wouldn't tell a Jewish person they should eat shellfish because it's more sanitary nowadays, would you?

You really need to learn what an analogous situation is. Because none of the ones you have listed qualify.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Also, let people know in the invite. You could also provide shoe covers like realtors use, as a compromise? Or maybe that’s weird?

I would think it's really weird if you gave me shoe covers for my heels but I would prefer that to you making me walk around your house barefoot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Seriously curious about everyone's foot hygiene if they can't bear the thought of being in socks in someone else's home.

My tennis shoes and boots are the only shoes that I wear socks with. Heels? No. Sandals? No. Slip ons? No. So the majority of shoes I'm wearing do not go with socks. And I'm not putting on a pair of Adidas socks with a nice dress.

[Anonymous]

We host people at our house all the time. If it's a casual thing or with a few people, they tend to take their shoes off. If it's a more formal or larger event, they don't. Same people. I don't care one way or the other so I let my guests decide, but I just threw a dinner party and a baby shower and no one took their shoes off for either. I assume they were dressed similarly to how your guests would be, which was somewhat business casual/semi-formal.