I’m really surprised at the number of people who bring siblings to parties

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son was turning 4 and I was new to this party stuff in pre-school. She bought her son who was in his class and also brought her twins and they were begging for goody bags which were beyblades.

Later that year, she had a party for her son and I brought my 2 year old daughter and she said goody bags were only for the classmate, not the guest. What an Effing Biatch!

We know a family with 4 kids. They often come as a full family and bring all 4 kids to parties. I just saw the mom and she said she wanted to have a drop off party for her son’s birthday so parents and siblings don’t stay. I was surprised she felt this way because she brings the entire family to most parties.

RUDE!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get what you all are saying because hey we are American and this is our culture. But take a look at yourselves and read back over some of these things. We are a totally individualistic non family oriented, non community oriented society. This is exactly why our society is so lonely. It is a much nicer weekend activity for our family to go to a party with kids of all ages, socialize a bit with other adults, have everyone together, build a community than to have one parent go for two hours with one sibling and then come back. And the comments about the siblings is just taking it too far - like there is no possible way a kid two years older could have fun at a kids party that is not their specific friend. Actually my kids know the siblings of their friends partly because of the parties (and school). Other cultures handle this in a much different way than we do and I can definitely see the positives in that.

I just had a party at a venue that cost $2000 for 30 kids. With food and goody bags, it was $3000. I invited the entire class plus a few friends. Every single kid in my child’s class has 2-3 siblings. My party was for 30 kids. The party room had a max limit.

Even if I wanted, I couldn’t just add the 2-3 siblings of each kid and both parents. By inviting the entire class, I could not accommodate siblings.

When my kids were younger, the classes were smaller and it absolutely was more a family affair. When an elementary kid has a friend party, you are no longer inviting your adult family friends. This is a different type of party.

I think any person who has actually held a party at a venue that costs per person can understand why siblings would not be invited.

We have money. Would an extra 1k have broken the bank for us? Of course not but we just didn’t have the space.

WTAF. What venue costs $2000 for a kid party?? Even if you invite 30 kids I don’t see how you get $2000. Our kid just had a party w 20 kids at sky zone and it was around $500. And $1000 for goody bags and food?! That is totally outrageous, I don’t care how wealthy you are…$3000 for a kids’ bday party is idiotic.

We went to a party like this. The girl was turning 5. It was at the Marriott conference center in north Bethesda. There was a bounce house, golf, ballon animals, face painting, cotton candy, candy bar. Pizza and pasta for kids, heavy apps for adults. It was crazy. I was in shock at the amount of money spent. It was pre pandemic. It was probably about $5-7K!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get what you all are saying because hey we are American and this is our culture. But take a look at yourselves and read back over some of these things. We are a totally individualistic non family oriented, non community oriented society. This is exactly why our society is so lonely. It is a much nicer weekend activity for our family to go to a party with kids of all ages, socialize a bit with other adults, have everyone together, build a community than to have one parent go for two hours with one sibling and then come back. And the comments about the siblings is just taking it too far - like there is no possible way a kid two years older could have fun at a kids party that is not their specific friend. Actually my kids know the siblings of their friends partly because of the parties (and school). Other cultures handle this in a much different way than we do and I can definitely see the positives in that.

I just had a party at a venue that cost $2000 for 30 kids. With food and goody bags, it was $3000. I invited the entire class plus a few friends. Every single kid in my child’s class has 2-3 siblings. My party was for 30 kids. The party room had a max limit.

Even if I wanted, I couldn’t just add the 2-3 siblings of each kid and both parents. By inviting the entire class, I could not accommodate siblings.

When my kids were younger, the classes were smaller and it absolutely was more a family affair. When an elementary kid has a friend party, you are no longer inviting your adult family friends. This is a different type of party.

I think any person who has actually held a party at a venue that costs per person can understand why siblings would not be invited.

We have money. Would an extra 1k have broken the bank for us? Of course not but we just didn’t have the space.

WTAF. What venue costs $2000 for a kid party?? Even if you invite 30 kids I don’t see how you get $2000. Our kid just had a party w 20 kids at sky zone and it was around $500. And $1000 for goody bags and food?! That is totally outrageous, I don’t care how wealthy you are…$3000 for a kids’ bday party is idiotic.

We went to a party like this. The girl was turning 5. It was at the Marriott conference center in north Bethesda. There was a bounce house, golf, ballon animals, face painting, cotton candy, candy bar. Pizza and pasta for kids, heavy apps for adults. It was crazy. I was in shock at the amount of money spent. It was pre pandemic. It was probably about $5-7K!

Pp here. My party was not some crazy luxurious party. I won’t mention where to be anonymous.

I will say that I have thrown other parties that also cost me $2000 and it is because I am inclusive and invite the class or all of the same sex.

My friend had a party at the st James for her twins and it cost similarly. The whole point is that guests with whole families may not think it is a big deal to bring the siblings and parents but it costs the host extra and sometimes they really don’t have the space.

There are many parties that quickly moves to the $2000 number when you invite over 25 kids. This same party before Covid probably would have cost 500 but now it is over $1000 and if you invite 30-40 people because you invite the class and your soccer friends, it adds up. If every kid from soccer brings their siblings and everyone from their class brings siblings, the already large headcount will be double or triple.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get what you all are saying because hey we are American and this is our culture. But take a look at yourselves and read back over some of these things. We are a totally individualistic non family oriented, non community oriented society. This is exactly why our society is so lonely. It is a much nicer weekend activity for our family to go to a party with kids of all ages, socialize a bit with other adults, have everyone together, build a community than to have one parent go for two hours with one sibling and then come back. And the comments about the siblings is just taking it too far - like there is no possible way a kid two years older could have fun at a kids party that is not their specific friend. Actually my kids know the siblings of their friends partly because of the parties (and school). Other cultures handle this in a much different way than we do and I can definitely see the positives in that.

I just had a party at a venue that cost $2000 for 30 kids. With food and goody bags, it was $3000. I invited the entire class plus a few friends. Every single kid in my child’s class has 2-3 siblings. My party was for 30 kids. The party room had a max limit.

Even if I wanted, I couldn’t just add the 2-3 siblings of each kid and both parents. By inviting the entire class, I could not accommodate siblings.

When my kids were younger, the classes were smaller and it absolutely was more a family affair. When an elementary kid has a friend party, you are no longer inviting your adult family friends. This is a different type of party.

I think any person who has actually held a party at a venue that costs per person can understand why siblings would not be invited.

We have money. Would an extra 1k have broken the bank for us? Of course not but we just didn’t have the space.

WTAF. What venue costs $2000 for a kid party?? Even if you invite 30 kids I don’t see how you get $2000. Our kid just had a party w 20 kids at sky zone and it was around $500. And $1000 for goody bags and food?! That is totally outrageous, I don’t care how wealthy you are…$3000 for a kids’ bday party is idiotic.

We went to a party like this. The girl was turning 5. It was at the Marriott conference center in north Bethesda. There was a bounce house, golf, ballon animals, face painting, cotton candy, candy bar. Pizza and pasta for kids, heavy apps for adults. It was crazy. I was in shock at the amount of money spent. It was pre pandemic. It was probably about $5-7K!

My friend is a party planner. For the record, this type of party post pandemic would cost you over 10k. You can spend thousands on just decor.

Pp and many people on this thread seem to not realize how much more parties cost these days.

[Anonymous]

Just like the price of your hotel or rent or milk has gone up over the past 4 years, these party places also doubled in price and they charge you food and drink like you are at a restaurant. They charged me tip on the entire party bill. I remember before Covid, I used to hand each teen a $20. I was planning to give the teens $40. Instead, $300 was added to my bill for just gratuity.

[Anonymous]

And yesterday I got take out from a restaurant and I had to leave 18% gratuity on take out. That was the lowest tip amount. The tip culture these days is out of control.

End rant.

[Anonymous]

Twin mom sounds a bit crazy.

Signed,
Actually adult twin.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get what you all are saying because hey we are American and this is our culture. But take a look at yourselves and read back over some of these things. We are a totally individualistic non family oriented, non community oriented society. This is exactly why our society is so lonely. It is a much nicer weekend activity for our family to go to a party with kids of all ages, socialize a bit with other adults, have everyone together, build a community than to have one parent go for two hours with one sibling and then come back. And the comments about the siblings is just taking it too far - like there is no possible way a kid two years older could have fun at a kids party that is not their specific friend. Actually my kids know the siblings of their friends partly because of the parties (and school). Other cultures handle this in a much different way than we do and I can definitely see the positives in that.

I just had a party at a venue that cost $2000 for 30 kids. With food and goody bags, it was $3000. I invited the entire class plus a few friends. Every single kid in my child’s class has 2-3 siblings. My party was for 30 kids. The party room had a max limit.

Even if I wanted, I couldn’t just add the 2-3 siblings of each kid and both parents. By inviting the entire class, I could not accommodate siblings.

When my kids were younger, the classes were smaller and it absolutely was more a family affair. When an elementary kid has a friend party, you are no longer inviting your adult family friends. This is a different type of party.

I think any person who has actually held a party at a venue that costs per person can understand why siblings would not be invited.

We have money. Would an extra 1k have broken the bank for us? Of course not but we just didn’t have the space.

WTAF. What venue costs $2000 for a kid party?? Even if you invite 30 kids I don’t see how you get $2000. Our kid just had a party w 20 kids at sky zone and it was around $500. And $1000 for goody bags and food?! That is totally outrageous, I don’t care how wealthy you are…$3000 for a kids’ bday party is idiotic.

We will likely spend 1k for a party soon. We only have them for milestones but still.
525 venue- they provide decorations for the room
25 kids + 25-30 adults pizza= 200-250 + cake= 50 + drinks =50 + fruit= 50 + plates/napkins/silverware for adults=50
No goodie bags.
Tip for workers=50
1025 total

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get what you all are saying because hey we are American and this is our culture. But take a look at yourselves and read back over some of these things. We are a totally individualistic non family oriented, non community oriented society. This is exactly why our society is so lonely. It is a much nicer weekend activity for our family to go to a party with kids of all ages, socialize a bit with other adults, have everyone together, build a community than to have one parent go for two hours with one sibling and then come back. And the comments about the siblings is just taking it too far - like there is no possible way a kid two years older could have fun at a kids party that is not their specific friend. Actually my kids know the siblings of their friends partly because of the parties (and school). Other cultures handle this in a much different way than we do and I can definitely see the positives in that.

I just had a party at a venue that cost $2000 for 30 kids. With food and goody bags, it was $3000. I invited the entire class plus a few friends. Every single kid in my child’s class has 2-3 siblings. My party was for 30 kids. The party room had a max limit.

Even if I wanted, I couldn’t just add the 2-3 siblings of each kid and both parents. By inviting the entire class, I could not accommodate siblings.

When my kids were younger, the classes were smaller and it absolutely was more a family affair. When an elementary kid has a friend party, you are no longer inviting your adult family friends. This is a different type of party.

I think any person who has actually held a party at a venue that costs per person can understand why siblings would not be invited.

We have money. Would an extra 1k have broken the bank for us? Of course not but we just didn’t have the space.

WTAF. What venue costs $2000 for a kid party?? Even if you invite 30 kids I don’t see how you get $2000. Our kid just had a party w 20 kids at sky zone and it was around $500. And $1000 for goody bags and food?! That is totally outrageous, I don’t care how wealthy you are…$3000 for a kids’ bday party is idiotic.

We will likely spend 1k for a party soon. We only have them for milestones but still.
525 venue- they provide decorations for the room
25 kids + 25-30 adults pizza= 200-250 + cake= 50 + drinks =50 + fruit= 50 + plates/napkins/silverware for adults=50
No goodie bags.
Tip for workers=50
1025 total

Adding I cant WAIT for drop off parties. The biggest cost outside the venue is feeding adults, who likely wont eat, but you have to have food there. Its not even a eating time frame but we still have to provide it.

Id rather take 3 kids tubing, even if it was more expensive

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids come as a set. They are close enough in age to go to same parties. Parents need to get over themselves and let kids be kids and play together. Im over all of these extra party rules. My kid / sibling has never been turned away FWIW.

I have 3 kids. I don’t know anyone who thinks kids come as a set, not even twin moms.

When kids are young and in preschool, hanging out with multiple kids is ok. When kids attend elementary and kids are drop off ages, it is not ok to send big siblings as a set.

Twin mom here. My girls are definitely a set. We should at least be exceptions to the rule. If both my girls cant go, im declining the invite. But it has never been a problem.

Yeah, no. Stop treating your children like a matched set and see them as individuals.

Are they allowed to be in different classes? Have different interests?

If you are not a twin mom, you are clueless and should not speak on twin mom decisions. We have it hard enough. You basically sound like a childfree person telling you how to parent. Clueless! Those that get it- get it.

Hahaha- delusional twin mom. I knew it. You guys think NO ONE has it harder than you.

We DO have it harder at certain stages sweetheart! Its twice the work. YOU are delusional to think otherwise. In addition to my twins, they have an older sibling so I know how it is to parent one age at a time. Again, unless you are twin mom, you have no clue. My SET of twins go to the party together.

I’m not the PP you’re arguing with, but I think you’re missing the point. I don’t decide the guest list for my child’s birthday party based on who has it the hardest. I invite my child’s friends. If your family situation (or health or anything else) is too hard or too complicated to enable your child to attend, it’s completely ok for you to rsvp no. I understand that. We have had to rsvp to plenty of birthday parties.

Exactly. Twin moms think their challenges are unique and no one has it harder than them. And as the PP said, so now party invites are supposed to take into consideration everyone’s family circumstances? Of course, if a parent asks if they can bring a sibling due to spouse travel, whatever, that’s another story.

[Anonymous]

I don’t think I’ve been to a party where people brought siblings without checking with the host first.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think I’ve been to a party where people brought siblings without checking with the host first.

Op here. We actually had two parties this weekend. Both had many siblings. I was curious and checked the Evite and parents did not rsvp with siblings. One party it felt like the majority was full families. Second party had at least half the kids being siblings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get what you all are saying because hey we are American and this is our culture. But take a look at yourselves and read back over some of these things. We are a totally individualistic non family oriented, non community oriented society. This is exactly why our society is so lonely. It is a much nicer weekend activity for our family to go to a party with kids of all ages, socialize a bit with other adults, have everyone together, build a community than to have one parent go for two hours with one sibling and then come back. And the comments about the siblings is just taking it too far - like there is no possible way a kid two years older could have fun at a kids party that is not their specific friend. Actually my kids know the siblings of their friends partly because of the parties (and school). Other cultures handle this in a much different way than we do and I can definitely see the positives in that.

I just had a party at a venue that cost $2000 for 30 kids. With food and goody bags, it was $3000. I invited the entire class plus a few friends. Every single kid in my child’s class has 2-3 siblings. My party was for 30 kids. The party room had a max limit.

Even if I wanted, I couldn’t just add the 2-3 siblings of each kid and both parents. By inviting the entire class, I could not accommodate siblings.

When my kids were younger, the classes were smaller and it absolutely was more a family affair. When an elementary kid has a friend party, you are no longer inviting your adult family friends. This is a different type of party.

I think any person who has actually held a party at a venue that costs per person can understand why siblings would not be invited.

We have money. Would an extra 1k have broken the bank for us? Of course not but we just didn’t have the space.

WTAF. What venue costs $2000 for a kid party?? Even if you invite 30 kids I don’t see how you get $2000. Our kid just had a party w 20 kids at sky zone and it was around $500. And $1000 for goody bags and food?! That is totally outrageous, I don’t care how wealthy you are…$3000 for a kids’ bday party is idiotic.

We will likely spend 1k for a party soon. We only have them for milestones but still.
525 venue- they provide decorations for the room
25 kids + 25-30 adults pizza= 200-250 + cake= 50 + drinks =50 + fruit= 50 + plates/napkins/silverware for adults=50
No goodie bags.
Tip for workers=50
1025 total

I had a sky zone party and it cost over $1000. This is as basic as parties go. We had pizza and cake. This was not some fancy party.

I had a child in kindergarten last year and I invited the full class, some friends from preschool and a few family friends. Many of the classmates RSVPd for siblings. We purposely picked a venue that could accommodate a lot of people. Our party room had a maximum. I think it was 65. I remember being stressed without enough favors right before the event and being over the 65. I think we had 75 people because a class of 20 plus 10 others is 30 but when kids bring 2-3 siblings, the kids suddenly went to 50 kids. DH said parents could stand outside party room and it all worked out. That party definitely cost over $2000.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids come as a set. They are close enough in age to go to same parties. Parents need to get over themselves and let kids be kids and play together. Im over all of these extra party rules. My kid / sibling has never been turned away FWIW.

I have 3 kids. I don’t know anyone who thinks kids come as a set, not even twin moms.

When kids are young and in preschool, hanging out with multiple kids is ok. When kids attend elementary and kids are drop off ages, it is not ok to send big siblings as a set.

Twin mom here. My girls are definitely a set. We should at least be exceptions to the rule. If both my girls cant go, im declining the invite. But it has never been a problem.

Yeah, no. Stop treating your children like a matched set and see them as individuals.

Are they allowed to be in different classes? Have different interests?

If you are not a twin mom, you are clueless and should not speak on twin mom decisions. We have it hard enough. You basically sound like a childfree person telling you how to parent. Clueless! Those that get it- get it.

Hahaha- delusional twin mom. I knew it. You guys think NO ONE has it harder than you.

We DO have it harder at certain stages sweetheart! Its twice the work. YOU are delusional to think otherwise. In addition to my twins, they have an older sibling so I know how it is to parent one age at a time. Again, unless you are twin mom, you have no clue. My SET of twins go to the party together.

I’m not the PP you’re arguing with, but I think you’re missing the point. I don’t decide the guest list for my child’s birthday party based on who has it the hardest. I invite my child’s friends. If your family situation (or health or anything else) is too hard or too complicated to enable your child to attend, it’s completely ok for you to rsvp no. I understand that. We have had to rsvp to plenty of birthday parties.

Exactly. Twin moms think their challenges are unique and no one has it harder than them. And as the PP said, so now party invites are supposed to take into consideration everyone’s family circumstances? Of course, if a parent asks if they can bring a sibling due to spouse travel, whatever, that’s another story.

Twin moms often makes the problem worse. My son is friends with a twin who is much smarter than his twin sister. One twin went to AAP and other didn’t. Mom treats them as individuals and like siblings more than twins.

I know other twin moms who stress about one twin being smarter or having more friends. If they treated them like individuals instead of twins, they could become more independent. I have a friend who had identical twins and she is always trying to make things equal. It seems like she is creating more stress for herself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids come as a set. They are close enough in age to go to same parties. Parents need to get over themselves and let kids be kids and play together. Im over all of these extra party rules. My kid / sibling has never been turned away FWIW.

I have 3 kids. I don’t know anyone who thinks kids come as a set, not even twin moms.

When kids are young and in preschool, hanging out with multiple kids is ok. When kids attend elementary and kids are drop off ages, it is not ok to send big siblings as a set.

Twin mom here. My girls are definitely a set. We should at least be exceptions to the rule. If both my girls cant go, im declining the invite. But it has never been a problem.

Yeah, no. Stop treating your children like a matched set and see them as individuals.

Are they allowed to be in different classes? Have different interests?

If you are not a twin mom, you are clueless and should not speak on twin mom decisions. We have it hard enough. You basically sound like a childfree person telling you how to parent. Clueless! Those that get it- get it.

Hahaha- delusional twin mom. I knew it. You guys think NO ONE has it harder than you.

We DO have it harder at certain stages sweetheart! Its twice the work. YOU are delusional to think otherwise. In addition to my twins, they have an older sibling so I know how it is to parent one age at a time. Again, unless you are twin mom, you have no clue. My SET of twins go to the party together.

I look forward to when your SET of twins begin dating the same person. Because they come as a SET. Not weird at all.