Should the guy always pay?

[Anonymous]

This thread is really sad. Even more sad is how it's 2023 and American women still judge their entire self worth on how much money they can get a man to spend on them. And yet they complain about how unfair men are.

Go figure

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The problem is that men who want to take advantage of “equality” in splitting the check don’t necessarily want to put in equal work in the other aspects of the relationship/household.

The problem is that women who want to take advantage and not be equal in splitting the check don't necessarily want to put in equal work to be a financial partner in the relationship. They don't share the financial responsibility for the relationship or household.


They should just add traditional gender roles option to dating apps. Let the men who want to pay and the woman who want to be pretty for their man - meet up. Then the people for whom those qualities are important in a mate can find each other. Let the gentlemanly and ladylike people find each other easier and let those of us who want more equality rule them out faster.

You can't have your cake and eat it but not share the cost. Either have traditional roles or have modern style equality.

This might be what you think but there are plenty of men who are happy to pay for the dates and have an equitable marriage. A man insisting women pay for dates isn't some sign of commitment to feminism. I think it makes you sound like a jerk.

If a woman expects men to pay for dates, she is is also acting as a cheap jerk.

So…don’t date women who don’t want to pay. I don’t understand why this is hard.

Because they want to date a woman too hot and too young to offer to pay, then complain about her on the internet.

I never, ever complain about paying for a woman in her 20s. She doesn't even have to be hot. I'll happily pay, because those women are the best dates.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread is really sad. Even more sad is how it's 2023 and American women still judge their entire self worth on how much money they can get a man to spend on them. And yet they complain about how unfair men are.

Go figure

Read this poster who commented after you: men get invested financially in women and dates they like. It’s the men’s world. Yes, if a guy wants me to split the check my conclusion is he doesn’t find me hot so no point continue seeing him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Read this poster who commented after you: men get invested financially in women and dates they like. It’s the men’s world. Yes, if a guy wants me to split the check my conclusion is he doesn’t find me hot so no point continue seeing him.

This is also known as prostitution

[Anonymous]

Whoever invites, pays.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Whoever invites, pays.

Judging yourself on how much money you can attract. A tale as old as time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Read this poster who commented after you: men get invested financially in women and dates they like. It’s the men’s world. Yes, if a guy wants me to split the check my conclusion is he doesn’t find me hot so no point continue seeing him.

This is also known as prostitution

No, it’s called dating etiquette. First few dinners don’t end up in sex. Women who date you sleep with you for free, not for dinners, imbecile! Paying for dates is a small gesture he can make to show her his interest.

Beside, hiring non-trashy prostitutes would be far more expensive : they don’t do it for dinners or because they like you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Read this poster who commented after you: men get invested financially in women and dates they like. It’s the men’s world. Yes, if a guy wants me to split the check my conclusion is he doesn’t find me hot so no point continue seeing him.

This is also known as prostitution

You need to read up on prostitution, which is exchanging physical favors for money. Being treated to dinner by a date is, get ready, accepting a gesture of kindness and hospitality from a potential partner. There is no implication of an obligation and the kind of guy who thinks there is is the kind of guy who doesn’t get a second date.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Read this poster who commented after you: men get invested financially in women and dates they like. It’s the men’s world. Yes, if a guy wants me to split the check my conclusion is he doesn’t find me hot so no point continue seeing him.

This is also known as prostitution

You need to read up on prostitution, which is exchanging physical favors for money. Being treated to dinner by a date is, get ready, accepting a gesture of kindness and hospitality from a potential partner. There is no implication of an obligation and the kind of guy who thinks there is is the kind of guy who doesn’t get a second date.

What are these guys complaining about, really? Are they unhappy about not offered sex or second dates? A normal woman would never pick Black Salt for first few dates. It’s usually just a mid day coffee at Starbucks for me, then (if there is a second date) a tapas place (lunch again as I don’t commit my weekends for early dates). If there is a third date usually it’s a man I like in “that sense”. He will certainly be made aware of my interest in many ways and won’t feel used.

Men shouldn’t try so hard to impress with expensive restaurants right away, to avoid disappointments. Or just allow for “dating budget” and consider it an investment in finding the right partner.

[Anonymous]

Most women do not make a lot of money and are struggling to get by so of course the man pays.

[Anonymous]

The wealthiest pays more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Who are these women that all think they’re top 1% for looks and income?? If you’re on DCUM, you’re not. I work with women who are legit top 1% in looks and wealth, and I promise they ain’t on here. You’re probably like me - the prettiest in your high school class, maybe did some modeling, now make 6 figures. Sorry, but we’re nowhere near the top.

Also pretty horrible to teach your daughters to think this way. My parents drilled it into me that because I was beautiful and came from a wealthy family, I needed to find an attractive, wealthy man. It screwed me up BAD and it took me until my mid-30s to learn what it actually important in a partner.

I said I was top 1% brains and top 10% looks. Never said I was top 1% looks. I am not.

Dh is top 1% income and we are in top 1% NW.

[Anonymous]

Guys should not always pay. Absolutely not. It’s the 20s for heaven’s sake!

[Anonymous]

For the first 3-5 dates, the man should pay imo.

The woman should start offering to chip in after like the 4th or 5th date.
The man should refuse but be polite.

After about five dates (more or less), then the woman should pay for her half by going Dutch or trading off.

However if the guy makes good money + ends up paying often because of it - then it would be nice in return if the woman lets the man eat at her house a lot.

Bonus points if she is a good cook & cooks dinner for him a few nights per week.
And extra brownie points if she even does the dishes and clean up w/out complaining. 👍🏽

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are these women that all think they’re top 1% for looks and income?? If you’re on DCUM, you’re not. I work with women who are legit top 1% in looks and wealth, and I promise they ain’t on here. You’re probably like me - the prettiest in your high school class, maybe did some modeling, now make 6 figures. Sorry, but we’re nowhere near the top.

Also pretty horrible to teach your daughters to think this way. My parents drilled it into me that because I was beautiful and came from a wealthy family, I needed to find an attractive, wealthy man. It screwed me up BAD and it took me until my mid-30s to learn what it actually important in a partner.

I said I was top 1% brains and top 10% looks. Never said I was top 1% looks. I am not.

Dh is top 1% income and we are in top 1% NW.

So you're a 9 out of 10 in looks?

You realize that's pretty much model status right? Is that you?