Any men here who walked away from their families?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Second family dudes are my least favorite. I think it’s because of growing up around enough first family kids. But now as an adult, if you have a second family I have a really hard time respecting you even if you’re a senator or a fancy lawyer or whatever. It’s a red line for me. I understand that people get divorced, but I’ll never understand the do-over family.

+1. It's immoral to leave your first children behind in order to pursue a new family. It causes such betrayal pain and generational trauma.

Kids recognize when the SAHM just relies on her title and duties as Mom. They understand who the successful one is, and whose train they need to hitch. They can see when Dad is busting his butt and provides a huge house for the family, vs the Mom crying through making dinner because her own Dad died SIX months ago. They understand when they’re out at an event and people fawn over their Dad, and then turn to the supposedly indispensable SAHM and say “And you are?”

So like Nick in the Four Seasons, when I had the opportunity to leave SAHM for someone so much better, I didn’t hesitate. I demanded dual custody with no say for her on who spent time with the kids during my time (that’s really important). I wasn’t going to let her veto anyone I date. My girlfriend knows my kids are my legacy and is good with that.

I’m able to mold my girlfriend in ways that are better for all of us. She understands that her expectations and values need to align with mine, and she appreciates all I do for her professionally and personally. She’s only gotten hotter the last two years since we’ve gotten together.

We’re like the Four Seasons in that we do a big trip together four times a year. We did Disney in the spring, and St. Barts this summer. Fall is Vegas F1 and then we’re hitting Switzerland for Christmas. My ex just can’t compete, though she pitifully tries with overnights to the Greenbrier with the kids that eat up a week of client fees (she’s a therapist now that she has to work again). But when Dad takes you on elite vacations and his GF is within a decade of your oldest and can turn him on to new TikTok videos, the kids see Mom as pathetic. They know they’re far better off if they’re loyal to me, no matter how much “quality time” Ms. Psychoanalyst wants to spend with them exploring their feelings.

You are continually trying to defend your crappy choices and hot young gf on DCUM. I'm amazed to recognize you, Mr. Prominent Scientist, on DCUM, whenever you pop up.

You never learned that having a happy small home with healthy relationships is better than a large home with miserable people. You seem to think your genius entitles you to any selfishness you want to explore. I wouldn't be surprised if your kids take after you which is why they are delighted to use you for fun vacations and tolerate leaving their emotionally-crushed mother in the dust. BTW, with Greenbrier money, she could also afford European vacations and Disney.

Your hot young scientist girlfriend hopefully doesn't want to have kids. If she does, and she plans to stay with you, then she is not actually that smart.

Stop trying to get DCUM to validate your choices. Your recognizable bragging is heartless and makes me feel worse for your wife. When married people miss their parents that much it suggests they feel profoundly unloved.

I'm also never impressed by celebrities who crush their spouses into dust. Not the King of England, and not you.

I had to look up your Four Seasons reference. Your gf has much more work to do to bring your references up to date. I sentence you to more TikTok.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Second family dudes are my least favorite. I think it’s because of growing up around enough first family kids. But now as an adult, if you have a second family I have a really hard time respecting you even if you’re a senator or a fancy lawyer or whatever. It’s a red line for me. I understand that people get divorced, but I’ll never understand the do-over family.

+1. It's immoral to leave your first children behind in order to pursue a new family. It causes such betrayal pain and generational trauma.

Kids recognize when the SAHM just relies on her title and duties as Mom. They understand who the successful one is, and whose train they need to hitch. They can see when Dad is busting his butt and provides a huge house for the family, vs the Mom crying through making dinner because her own Dad died SIX months ago. They understand when they’re out at an event and people fawn over their Dad, and then turn to the supposedly indispensable SAHM and say “And you are?”

So like Nick in the Four Seasons, when I had the opportunity to leave SAHM for someone so much better, I didn’t hesitate. I demanded dual custody with no say for her on who spent time with the kids during my time (that’s really important). I wasn’t going to let her veto anyone I date. My girlfriend knows my kids are my legacy and is good with that.

I’m able to mold my girlfriend in ways that are better for all of us. She understands that her expectations and values need to align with mine, and she appreciates all I do for her professionally and personally. She’s only gotten hotter the last two years since we’ve gotten together.

We’re like the Four Seasons in that we do a big trip together four times a year. We did Disney in the spring, and St. Barts this summer. Fall is Vegas F1 and then we’re hitting Switzerland for Christmas. My ex just can’t compete, though she pitifully tries with overnights to the Greenbrier with the kids that eat up a week of client fees (she’s a therapist now that she has to work again). But when Dad takes you on elite vacations and his GF is within a decade of your oldest and can turn him on to new TikTok videos, the kids see Mom as pathetic. They know they’re far better off if they’re loyal to me, no matter how much “quality time” Ms. Psychoanalyst wants to spend with them exploring their feelings.

“They know they’re far better off if they’re loyal to me”
You sound like you’ve tried to purchase their affections. They might like you for your money, but having a child bride watching TikTok videos with them doesn’t build the sort of bond you’re theorizing. The men (people really) who hold money over people’s heads never do well in the long run.

Does your gf work? I wonder why you disparage SAHM when it was likely at least partly your idea.

Folks. This is satire, right?

No. This is some health scientist from NIH or similar who may have a few inventions who fell in love with a lab junior on a business trip.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My best friend’s dad did when she was in high school and her sibling was in middle school. High income family where everyone had grad degrees, so this wasn’t some poor teenage dad being a deadbeat.

It seemed like part of a bigger midlife crisis because he ended up marrying someone much younger, acting totally different, etc.

I married a poor teenage dad (at an older age) who was ANYTHING but a deadbeat. Your framing really illustrates that its not an income or an age thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Second family dudes are my least favorite. I think it’s because of growing up around enough first family kids. But now as an adult, if you have a second family I have a really hard time respecting you even if you’re a senator or a fancy lawyer or whatever. It’s a red line for me. I understand that people get divorced, but I’ll never understand the do-over family.

+1. It's immoral to leave your first children behind in order to pursue a new family. It causes such betrayal pain and generational trauma.

Kids recognize when the SAHM just relies on her title and duties as Mom. They understand who the successful one is, and whose train they need to hitch. They can see when Dad is busting his butt and provides a huge house for the family, vs the Mom crying through making dinner because her own Dad died SIX months ago. They understand when they’re out at an event and people fawn over their Dad, and then turn to the supposedly indispensable SAHM and say “And you are?”

So like Nick in the Four Seasons, when I had the opportunity to leave SAHM for someone so much better, I didn’t hesitate. I demanded dual custody with no say for her on who spent time with the kids during my time (that’s really important). I wasn’t going to let her veto anyone I date. My girlfriend knows my kids are my legacy and is good with that.

I’m able to mold my girlfriend in ways that are better for all of us. She understands that her expectations and values need to align with mine, and she appreciates all I do for her professionally and personally. She’s only gotten hotter the last two years since we’ve gotten together.

We’re like the Four Seasons in that we do a big trip together four times a year. We did Disney in the spring, and St. Barts this summer. Fall is Vegas F1 and then we’re hitting Switzerland for Christmas. My ex just can’t compete, though she pitifully tries with overnights to the Greenbrier with the kids that eat up a week of client fees (she’s a therapist now that she has to work again). But when Dad takes you on elite vacations and his GF is within a decade of your oldest and can turn him on to new TikTok videos, the kids see Mom as pathetic. They know they’re far better off if they’re loyal to me, no matter how much “quality time” Ms. Psychoanalyst wants to spend with them exploring their feelings.

You are a deeply disturbed human being. Life isn't a contest, and your children's feelings can't be bought. Your hot new plaything's ability to show your kids cool tiktoks isn't going to negate the complete lack of emotional intelligence in your post, and your contempt for the children's other parent is going to wreck your relationship to your kids.

And when they're sad, or scared, or stressed, or struggling, they're not going to come to you for anything more than money and a vacation. They'll go to her, because it's safe to be whole human beings with feelings in her care.

Enjoy dying lonely, guy who thought he could buy his family's loyalty with some trips and glitz. How pathetic.

PS - the new T&A is only with you for the $$$

Duh, can't you tell he's just a shallow person?
Whatever you ladies attack him for will go nowhere because his priorities are beyond comprehension.

He pays attention which is why he keeps coming back to present his case. He's looking for validation wherever he can get it. Still hoping for DCUM, but there are too many women his age here to buy his line of reasoning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know I will get slammed, but most of these marriages are dead and transactional by that point anyway. It’s rarely a shock to anyone, and in retrospect, often a blessing.

Marriage shouldn’t stop a father from being a father. If his marriage dissolves he’s no longer a husband, but he’s still a father. That isn’t an excuse for dead beats.

I don’t agree with the idea that somehow kids will always want have a connection with father. It’s completely unrealistic and ignores reality. Sure it’s true for some but not all situations. Mothers or fathers ( less likely) can turn the kids against the other parent

Some moms want to cover up their affair and play happy family with the ap. Dad’s role is only money and she refuses contact and alienates the kids. It goes both ways.

Nope. You can’t alienate the kids if you’re an involved caring parent to begin with. Stop making excuses for lazy men who refuse to parent.

A determined angry woman can absolutely alienate the kids. Stop making excuses for spiteful women.

They literally can’t though. If a dad is kind, caring, involved and the kids know that they would never believe any lies told. The only thing that kids know is if you show up and are there. If your ex is some all powerful wizard then sure, maybe I’d believe that she is magically strong enough to alienate your children. Otherwise? You’re just lazy and selfish. You care more about yourself and your ego than your kids. Those people? That’s not alienation, that’s just the common sense outcome of not caring about your kids.

It's hard to have a conversation with someone who is so simple minded and clearly has an axe to grind, but kids do believe their parents, even when they tell them things that don't seem right. The fact that you don't understand that (or refuse to acknowledge it) says a lot about your parenting. The more you post the more I feel sorry for your ex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Second family dudes are my least favorite. I think it’s because of growing up around enough first family kids. But now as an adult, if you have a second family I have a really hard time respecting you even if you’re a senator or a fancy lawyer or whatever. It’s a red line for me. I understand that people get divorced, but I’ll never understand the do-over family.

+1. It's immoral to leave your first children behind in order to pursue a new family. It causes such betrayal pain and generational trauma.

Kids recognize when the SAHM just relies on her title and duties as Mom. They understand who the successful one is, and whose train they need to hitch. They can see when Dad is busting his butt and provides a huge house for the family, vs the Mom crying through making dinner because her own Dad died SIX months ago. They understand when they’re out at an event and people fawn over their Dad, and then turn to the supposedly indispensable SAHM and say “And you are?”

So like Nick in the Four Seasons, when I had the opportunity to leave SAHM for someone so much better, I didn’t hesitate. I demanded dual custody with no say for her on who spent time with the kids during my time (that’s really important). I wasn’t going to let her veto anyone I date. My girlfriend knows my kids are my legacy and is good with that.

I’m able to mold my girlfriend in ways that are better for all of us. She understands that her expectations and values need to align with mine, and she appreciates all I do for her professionally and personally. She’s only gotten hotter the last two years since we’ve gotten together.

We’re like the Four Seasons in that we do a big trip together four times a year. We did Disney in the spring, and St. Barts this summer. Fall is Vegas F1 and then we’re hitting Switzerland for Christmas. My ex just can’t compete, though she pitifully tries with overnights to the Greenbrier with the kids that eat up a week of client fees (she’s a therapist now that she has to work again). But when Dad takes you on elite vacations and his GF is within a decade of your oldest and can turn him on to new TikTok videos, the kids see Mom as pathetic. They know they’re far better off if they’re loyal to me, no matter how much “quality time” Ms. Psychoanalyst wants to spend with them exploring their feelings.

You are continually trying to defend your crappy choices and hot young gf on DCUM. I'm amazed to recognize you, Mr. Prominent Scientist, on DCUM, whenever you pop up.

You never learned that having a happy small home with healthy relationships is better than a large home with miserable people. You seem to think your genius entitles you to any selfishness you want to explore. I wouldn't be surprised if your kids take after you which is why they are delighted to use you for fun vacations and tolerate leaving their emotionally-crushed mother in the dust. BTW, with Greenbrier money, she could also afford European vacations and Disney.

Your hot young scientist girlfriend hopefully doesn't want to have kids. If she does, and she plans to stay with you, then she is not actually that smart.

Stop trying to get DCUM to validate your choices. Your recognizable bragging is heartless and makes me feel worse for your wife. When married people miss their parents that much it suggests they feel profoundly unloved.

I'm also never impressed by celebrities who crush their spouses into dust. Not the King of England, and not you.

I had to look up your Four Seasons reference. Your gf has much more work to do to bring your references up to date. I sentence you to more TikTok.

💀

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Second family dudes are my least favorite. I think it’s because of growing up around enough first family kids. But now as an adult, if you have a second family I have a really hard time respecting you even if you’re a senator or a fancy lawyer or whatever. It’s a red line for me. I understand that people get divorced, but I’ll never understand the do-over family.

+1. It's immoral to leave your first children behind in order to pursue a new family. It causes such betrayal pain and generational trauma.

Kids recognize when the SAHM just relies on her title and duties as Mom. They understand who the successful one is, and whose train they need to hitch. They can see when Dad is busting his butt and provides a huge house for the family, vs the Mom crying through making dinner because her own Dad died SIX months ago. They understand when they’re out at an event and people fawn over their Dad, and then turn to the supposedly indispensable SAHM and say “And you are?”

So like Nick in the Four Seasons, when I had the opportunity to leave SAHM for someone so much better, I didn’t hesitate. I demanded dual custody with no say for her on who spent time with the kids during my time (that’s really important). I wasn’t going to let her veto anyone I date. My girlfriend knows my kids are my legacy and is good with that.

I’m able to mold my girlfriend in ways that are better for all of us. She understands that her expectations and values need to align with mine, and she appreciates all I do for her professionally and personally. She’s only gotten hotter the last two years since we’ve gotten together.

We’re like the Four Seasons in that we do a big trip together four times a year. We did Disney in the spring, and St. Barts this summer. Fall is Vegas F1 and then we’re hitting Switzerland for Christmas. My ex just can’t compete, though she pitifully tries with overnights to the Greenbrier with the kids that eat up a week of client fees (she’s a therapist now that she has to work again). But when Dad takes you on elite vacations and his GF is within a decade of your oldest and can turn him on to new TikTok videos, the kids see Mom as pathetic. They know they’re far better off if they’re loyal to me, no matter how much “quality time” Ms. Psychoanalyst wants to spend with them exploring their feelings.

“They know they’re far better off if they’re loyal to me”
You sound like you’ve tried to purchase their affections. They might like you for your money, but having a child bride watching TikTok videos with them doesn’t build the sort of bond you’re theorizing. The men (people really) who hold money over people’s heads never do well in the long run.

Does your gf work? I wonder why you disparage SAHM when it was likely at least partly your idea.

Folks. This is satire, right?

No. This is some health scientist from NIH or similar who may have a few inventions who fell in love with a lab junior on a business trip.

"in love" when will people realize that great or even just good sex doesn't translate into actual love without work?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Second family dudes are my least favorite. I think it’s because of growing up around enough first family kids. But now as an adult, if you have a second family I have a really hard time respecting you even if you’re a senator or a fancy lawyer or whatever. It’s a red line for me. I understand that people get divorced, but I’ll never understand the do-over family.

+1.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Second family dudes are my least favorite. I think it’s because of growing up around enough first family kids. But now as an adult, if you have a second family I have a really hard time respecting you even if you’re a senator or a fancy lawyer or whatever. It’s a red line for me. I understand that people get divorced, but I’ll never understand the do-over family.

+1. It's immoral to leave your first children behind in order to pursue a new family. It causes such betrayal pain and generational trauma.

Kids recognize when the SAHM just relies on her title and duties as Mom. They understand who the successful one is, and whose train they need to hitch. They can see when Dad is busting his butt and provides a huge house for the family, vs the Mom crying through making dinner because her own Dad died SIX months ago. They understand when they’re out at an event and people fawn over their Dad, and then turn to the supposedly indispensable SAHM and say “And you are?”

So like Nick in the Four Seasons, when I had the opportunity to leave SAHM for someone so much better, I didn’t hesitate. I demanded dual custody with no say for her on who spent time with the kids during my time (that’s really important). I wasn’t going to let her veto anyone I date. My girlfriend knows my kids are my legacy and is good with that.

I’m able to mold my girlfriend in ways that are better for all of us. She understands that her expectations and values need to align with mine, and she appreciates all I do for her professionally and personally. She’s only gotten hotter the last two years since we’ve gotten together.

We’re like the Four Seasons in that we do a big trip together four times a year. We did Disney in the spring, and St. Barts this summer. Fall is Vegas F1 and then we’re hitting Switzerland for Christmas. My ex just can’t compete, though she pitifully tries with overnights to the Greenbrier with the kids that eat up a week of client fees (she’s a therapist now that she has to work again). But when Dad takes you on elite vacations and his GF is within a decade of your oldest and can turn him on to new TikTok videos, the kids see Mom as pathetic. They know they’re far better off if they’re loyal to me, no matter how much “quality time” Ms. Psychoanalyst wants to spend with them exploring their feelings.

This will not end well for you and I think you know that. Your post sounds like you are trying to convince yourself otherwise. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Second family dudes are my least favorite. I think it’s because of growing up around enough first family kids. But now as an adult, if you have a second family I have a really hard time respecting you even if you’re a senator or a fancy lawyer or whatever. It’s a red line for me. I understand that people get divorced, but I’ll never understand the do-over family.

+1. It's immoral to leave your first children behind in order to pursue a new family. It causes such betrayal pain and generational trauma.

Kids recognize when the SAHM just relies on her title and duties as Mom. They understand who the successful one is, and whose train they need to hitch. They can see when Dad is busting his butt and provides a huge house for the family, vs the Mom crying through making dinner because her own Dad died SIX months ago. They understand when they’re out at an event and people fawn over their Dad, and then turn to the supposedly indispensable SAHM and say “And you are?”

So like Nick in the Four Seasons, when I had the opportunity to leave SAHM for someone so much better, I didn’t hesitate. I demanded dual custody with no say for her on who spent time with the kids during my time (that’s really important). I wasn’t going to let her veto anyone I date. My girlfriend knows my kids are my legacy and is good with that.

I’m able to mold my girlfriend in ways that are better for all of us. She understands that her expectations and values need to align with mine, and she appreciates all I do for her professionally and personally. She’s only gotten hotter the last two years since we’ve gotten together.

We’re like the Four Seasons in that we do a big trip together four times a year. We did Disney in the spring, and St. Barts this summer. Fall is Vegas F1 and then we’re hitting Switzerland for Christmas. My ex just can’t compete, though she pitifully tries with overnights to the Greenbrier with the kids that eat up a week of client fees (she’s a therapist now that she has to work again). But when Dad takes you on elite vacations and his GF is within a decade of your oldest and can turn him on to new TikTok videos, the kids see Mom as pathetic. They know they’re far better off if they’re loyal to me, no matter how much “quality time” Ms. Psychoanalyst wants to spend with them exploring their feelings.

You are continually trying to defend your crappy choices and hot young gf on DCUM. I'm amazed to recognize you, Mr. Prominent Scientist, on DCUM, whenever you pop up.

You never learned that having a happy small home with healthy relationships is better than a large home with miserable people. You seem to think your genius entitles you to any selfishness you want to explore. I wouldn't be surprised if your kids take after you which is why they are delighted to use you for fun vacations and tolerate leaving their emotionally-crushed mother in the dust. BTW, with Greenbrier money, she could also afford European vacations and Disney.

Your hot young scientist girlfriend hopefully doesn't want to have kids. If she does, and she plans to stay with you, then she is not actually that smart.

Stop trying to get DCUM to validate your choices. Your recognizable bragging is heartless and makes me feel worse for your wife. When married people miss their parents that much it suggests they feel profoundly unloved.

I'm also never impressed by celebrities who crush their spouses into dust. Not the King of England, and not you.

I had to look up your Four Seasons reference. Your gf has much more work to do to bring your references up to date. I sentence you to more TikTok.

Between the cringe girlfriend trying to play cool by showing the kids TikToks, and dad trying to pretend he's rich on a scientist salary, I'm betting the kids are calling these vacations a Jet2 Holiday.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m PP with the sister who has been alienated despite her being there. People who responded she just needs to demand respect - it’s really not as easy or black and white as you want to believe. When she defends herself or calls him out, he angrily attacks. The kids have asked her not to respond so he won’t yell because it scares them. Despite seeing this, the kids have been so poisoned by him that they are on his side. They wont participate in conversations with her at dinner or include her in theirs when he is present. They constantly look for his approval if they do say something to her. He plans family activities and short vacations and she is not included (he will buy tickets for all but her). The kids refuse overtures by her to spend time with them if he is home. They feed him information on her phone calls and her activities. He involves them in marital issues in entirely inappropriate ways and she refuses to disparage him to them because she does not want them in the middle. It’s not as easy as saying “she should demand respect” or “kids won’t be alienated from a good parent.”
Divorce is the obvious answer, and hopefully that happens eventually. I wish he would be a walk-away dad.

Kids can't be alienated from a good parent. But she isn't a good parent. These children are terrified of this man. She has allowed them to be abused.

Yes they can.
They want to People Please the bully parent plus are starving for attention from the neglectful bully parent so lap it up when it comes in small doses.

Immature kids especially do that and then seek out male attention everywhere. Coaches, teachers, family, classmates.

Not good.

You keep making this up. It's really weird and sad. If this is you or your child, get help. Otherwise, most other kids are not like this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Second family dudes are my least favorite. I think it’s because of growing up around enough first family kids. But now as an adult, if you have a second family I have a really hard time respecting you even if you’re a senator or a fancy lawyer or whatever. It’s a red line for me. I understand that people get divorced, but I’ll never understand the do-over family.

+1. It's immoral to leave your first children behind in order to pursue a new family. It causes such betrayal pain and generational trauma.

Kids recognize when the SAHM just relies on her title and duties as Mom. They understand who the successful one is, and whose train they need to hitch. They can see when Dad is busting his butt and provides a huge house for the family, vs the Mom crying through making dinner because her own Dad died SIX months ago. They understand when they’re out at an event and people fawn over their Dad, and then turn to the supposedly indispensable SAHM and say “And you are?”

So like Nick in the Four Seasons, when I had the opportunity to leave SAHM for someone so much better, I didn’t hesitate. I demanded dual custody with no say for her on who spent time with the kids during my time (that’s really important). I wasn’t going to let her veto anyone I date. My girlfriend knows my kids are my legacy and is good with that.

I’m able to mold my girlfriend in ways that are better for all of us. She understands that her expectations and values need to align with mine, and she appreciates all I do for her professionally and personally. She’s only gotten hotter the last two years since we’ve gotten together.

We’re like the Four Seasons in that we do a big trip together four times a year. We did Disney in the spring, and St. Barts this summer. Fall is Vegas F1 and then we’re hitting Switzerland for Christmas. My ex just can’t compete, though she pitifully tries with overnights to the Greenbrier with the kids that eat up a week of client fees (she’s a therapist now that she has to work again). But when Dad takes you on elite vacations and his GF is within a decade of your oldest and can turn him on to new TikTok videos, the kids see Mom as pathetic. They know they’re far better off if they’re loyal to me, no matter how much “quality time” Ms. Psychoanalyst wants to spend with them exploring their feelings.

“They know they’re far better off if they’re loyal to me”
You sound like you’ve tried to purchase their affections. They might like you for your money, but having a child bride watching TikTok videos with them doesn’t build the sort of bond you’re theorizing. The men (people really) who hold money over people’s heads never do well in the long run.

Does your gf work? I wonder why you disparage SAHM when it was likely at least partly your idea.

Folks. This is satire, right?

No. This is some health scientist from NIH or similar who may have a few inventions who fell in love with a lab junior on a business trip.

Eh. I think it's 90% made up. Happy men in happy relationships don't spend their time trying to convince anonymous people online that they're happy. Happy people also don't talk about their exes like that.

At best, he's a Disney dad who's still bitter his wife left him, and he sees his kids only a few times a year (notice he said dual custody, not 50/50 custody). More likely, he's a troll who made the entire thing up, there is no girlfriend, no job, no ex-wife, no kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know I will get slammed, but most of these marriages are dead and transactional by that point anyway. It’s rarely a shock to anyone, and in retrospect, often a blessing.

Marriage shouldn’t stop a father from being a father. If his marriage dissolves he’s no longer a husband, but he’s still a father. That isn’t an excuse for dead beats.

I don’t agree with the idea that somehow kids will always want have a connection with father. It’s completely unrealistic and ignores reality. Sure it’s true for some but not all situations. Mothers or fathers ( less likely) can turn the kids against the other parent

Some moms want to cover up their affair and play happy family with the ap. Dad’s role is only money and she refuses contact and alienates the kids. It goes both ways.

Nope. You can’t alienate the kids if you’re an involved caring parent to begin with. Stop making excuses for lazy men who refuse to parent.

A determined angry woman can absolutely alienate the kids. Stop making excuses for spiteful women.

They literally can’t though. If a dad is kind, caring, involved and the kids know that they would never believe any lies told. The only thing that kids know is if you show up and are there. If your ex is some all powerful wizard then sure, maybe I’d believe that she is magically strong enough to alienate your children. Otherwise? You’re just lazy and selfish. You care more about yourself and your ego than your kids. Those people? That’s not alienation, that’s just the common sense outcome of not caring about your kids.

It's hard to have a conversation with someone who is so simple minded and clearly has an axe to grind, but kids do believe their parents, even when they tell them things that don't seem right. The fact that you don't understand that (or refuse to acknowledge it) says a lot about your parenting. The more you post the more I feel sorry for your ex.

When was the last time you saw your kids? Maybe make more of an effort with them instead of posting on dcum all day complaining your ex alienated your kids.

If you were a kind, competent, involved father, this wouldn't be an issue. The issue lies squarely and singly with you. Stop blaming women for your own personal and parental failures.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Second family dudes are my least favorite. I think it’s because of growing up around enough first family kids. But now as an adult, if you have a second family I have a really hard time respecting you even if you’re a senator or a fancy lawyer or whatever. It’s a red line for me. I understand that people get divorced, but I’ll never understand the do-over family.

+1. It's immoral to leave your first children behind in order to pursue a new family. It causes such betrayal pain and generational trauma.

Kids recognize when the SAHM just relies on her title and duties as Mom. They understand who the successful one is, and whose train they need to hitch. They can see when Dad is busting his butt and provides a huge house for the family, vs the Mom crying through making dinner because her own Dad died SIX months ago. They understand when they’re out at an event and people fawn over their Dad, and then turn to the supposedly indispensable SAHM and say “And you are?”

So like Nick in the Four Seasons, when I had the opportunity to leave SAHM for someone so much better, I didn’t hesitate. I demanded dual custody with no say for her on who spent time with the kids during my time (that’s really important). I wasn’t going to let her veto anyone I date. My girlfriend knows my kids are my legacy and is good with that.

I’m able to mold my girlfriend in ways that are better for all of us. She understands that her expectations and values need to align with mine, and she appreciates all I do for her professionally and personally. She’s only gotten hotter the last two years since we’ve gotten together.

We’re like the Four Seasons in that we do a big trip together four times a year. We did Disney in the spring, and St. Barts this summer. Fall is Vegas F1 and then we’re hitting Switzerland for Christmas. My ex just can’t compete, though she pitifully tries with overnights to the Greenbrier with the kids that eat up a week of client fees (she’s a therapist now that she has to work again). But when Dad takes you on elite vacations and his GF is within a decade of your oldest and can turn him on to new TikTok videos, the kids see Mom as pathetic. They know they’re far better off if they’re loyal to me, no matter how much “quality time” Ms. Psychoanalyst wants to spend with them exploring their feelings.

“They know they’re far better off if they’re loyal to me”
You sound like you’ve tried to purchase their affections. They might like you for your money, but having a child bride watching TikTok videos with them doesn’t build the sort of bond you’re theorizing. The men (people really) who hold money over people’s heads never do well in the long run.

Does your gf work? I wonder why you disparage SAHM when it was likely at least partly your idea.

Folks. This is satire, right?

No. This is some health scientist from NIH or similar who may have a few inventions who fell in love with a lab junior on a business trip.

Eh. I think it's 90% made up. Happy men in happy relationships don't spend their time trying to convince anonymous people online that they're happy. Happy people also don't talk about their exes like that.

At best, he's a Disney dad who's still bitter his wife left him, and he sees his kids only a few times a year (notice he said dual custody, not 50/50 custody). More likely, he's a troll who made the entire thing up, there is no girlfriend, no job, no ex-wife, no kids.

He's a once-a-month weekend dad who buys them whatever they want and feeds them mcdonalds and lets them rot in front of the TV. They probably dont even look at him, just have their noses stuck in their phones watching tiktoks. He doesnt know their teachers name or what their interests are. But he takes them on spring break to party with his gf!!

[Anonymous]

My good friend's XDH did this to her and their daughter when the child was in middle school. He moved to an apartment 5 blocks away, saying he would see their DD al the time and just went AWOL. It was awful. They would run into him at the grocery store, CVS and he would act like he didn't know them.

He said he just didn't feel like being a father anymore. He didn't come to any more school events, I never saw him at social engagements anymore. He just acted all single and had a completely different life. My friend has been a rock and a saint, raising her daughter now alone.