Redshirting my son for pre-k - May birthday

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is fascinating. We were planning to hold back child who will turn 5 at the end of June. He seems much more comfortable playing with younger kids and withdraws with kids his age. Ready academically but not socially? I didn’t realize it would be looked down upon.

It’s not looked down on by normal people. DCUM is not a good representative of normal people, unfortunately. But you will be fine.

Naive woman.

+2 Definitely looked down on, even if it is behind your back. Just being honest. May seems a stretch for redshirting.

+3

I'll bet you gossiping, snide, nasty people hold yourselves out to be the "better" families and think awfully highly of yourselves despite how you talk about innocent children. Please do call redshirted kids out so you can alert everyone to what kind of foul people you really are.

Pot calling the kettle.

Are you admitting to being a child on this board? Are you on your mom's phone? Because we are talking about children.

The hypocrisy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:May is too old. Down the road, kids will begin to notice how much older he is and think he must have been held back. He will be almost a year and a half older than some classmates. There was a kid at our school who was redshirted with a May birthday and he stood out as too old. Ge will turn 7 while in kindergarten! I’m surprised schools allow this. There should be a cut off at some point.

This doesn't happen. I know you like to think it does, but it doesn't and kids do not care about this at all. Only nosy busybody parents.

Oh yes it happens.

No, it really doesn't. I was just at a birthday party for a kindergartener turning 7 and nobody said a thing. My 6 year old kindergartener only thought it was unfair he got to turn 7 first. Someone will always have to be first. My 5th grader is with kids already turning 12. Again, nobody says a thing and the other kids just wish it was their birthday. The insecurity is on the parent's side, not the kids.

+1

It doesn’t happen in real life. One of the most well-liked, nicest kids in my DCs elementary class was a Feb. kid who was a year older. That kid could not have been more well-liked if he tried. And he was the oldest by literally months.

You don't see an issue with having 5 year olds in a class with 7 year olds?

Nope. Look at Montessori programs where there are blended age groups for classes. It’s fine and in fact there are even tangible benefits (older children serving as peer mentors and younger kids learning from them).

Don’t some of you have kids with older siblings? Do they spend time together or do you shelter the younger child from their older sibling too? Seriously, what is the big deal with kids of different ages being in the same class? What a strange issue to fixate on.

Kids should learn how to be with peers of different ages and abilities. That’s part of life.

Maybe your 7 year old should learn to be in class with kids his own age? My 13 year old is with a 15 year old in 8th grade. It is ludicrous. Trust me, my son is not learning beneficial things from his older classmate.

My 8 year old is in class with a range of kids, ages 7-9. He gets along with a variety of kids, including those his own age. Your 13 year old will be in high school next year and around seniors who are 18/19, whether you like it or not. Guess you think you can shelter your child indefinitely.

Maybe it’s a cultural thing but we grew up playing with kids of various ages in our neighborhood and immigrant community. Kids and adults also interact more in our culture. Not sure why there is this obsession with only having kids spend time with people their exact age. That is so strange to me. I also played sports with kids of different ages. Do your children not to that? Are they really so limited in this way?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is fascinating. We were planning to hold back child who will turn 5 at the end of June. He seems much more comfortable playing with younger kids and withdraws with kids his age. Ready academically but not socially? I didn’t realize it would be looked down upon.

It’s not looked down on by normal people. DCUM is not a good representative of normal people, unfortunately. But you will be fine.

Naive woman.

+2 Definitely looked down on, even if it is behind your back. Just being honest. May seems a stretch for redshirting.

+3

I'll bet you gossiping, snide, nasty people hold yourselves out to be the "better" families and think awfully highly of yourselves despite how you talk about innocent children. Please do call redshirted kids out so you can alert everyone to what kind of foul people you really are.

Pot calling the kettle.

Are you admitting to being a child on this board? Are you on your mom's phone? Because we are talking about children.

The hypocrisy.

You're still confused.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is fascinating. We were planning to hold back child who will turn 5 at the end of June. He seems much more comfortable playing with younger kids and withdraws with kids his age. Ready academically but not socially? I didn’t realize it would be looked down upon.

It’s not looked down on by normal people. DCUM is not a good representative of normal people, unfortunately. But you will be fine.

Naive woman.

+2 Definitely looked down on, even if it is behind your back. Just being honest. May seems a stretch for redshirting.

+3

I'll bet you gossiping, snide, nasty people hold yourselves out to be the "better" families and think awfully highly of yourselves despite how you talk about innocent children. Please do call redshirted kids out so you can alert everyone to what kind of foul people you really are.

Ironically, you are trash talking people and claiming to be “better.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:May is too old. Down the road, kids will begin to notice how much older he is and think he must have been held back. He will be almost a year and a half older than some classmates. There was a kid at our school who was redshirted with a May birthday and he stood out as too old. Ge will turn 7 while in kindergarten! I’m surprised schools allow this. There should be a cut off at some point.

This doesn't happen. I know you like to think it does, but it doesn't and kids do not care about this at all. Only nosy busybody parents.

Oh yes it happens.

No, it really doesn't. I was just at a birthday party for a kindergartener turning 7 and nobody said a thing. My 6 year old kindergartener only thought it was unfair he got to turn 7 first. Someone will always have to be first. My 5th grader is with kids already turning 12. Again, nobody says a thing and the other kids just wish it was their birthday. The insecurity is on the parent's side, not the kids.

+1

It doesn’t happen in real life. One of the most well-liked, nicest kids in my DCs elementary class was a Feb. kid who was a year older. That kid could not have been more well-liked if he tried. And he was the oldest by literally months.

You don't see an issue with having 5 year olds in a class with 7 year olds?

Nope. Look at Montessori programs where there are blended age groups for classes. It’s fine and in fact there are even tangible benefits (older children serving as peer mentors and younger kids learning from them).

Don’t some of you have kids with older siblings? Do they spend time together or do you shelter the younger child from their older sibling too? Seriously, what is the big deal with kids of different ages being in the same class? What a strange issue to fixate on.

Kids should learn how to be with peers of different ages and abilities. That’s part of life.

Maybe your 7 year old should learn to be in class with kids his own age? My 13 year old is with a 15 year old in 8th grade. It is ludicrous. Trust me, my son is not learning beneficial things from his older classmate.

I thought redshirted kids were so unpopular and reviled. Weird that your darling seems so drawn to this one classmate.

Are any others 15 years old around 13 years old?

My kid is an athlete and on sports team with kids older and younger than them. 13-15 year old isn’t a weird range to spend time together and hang out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is fascinating. We were planning to hold back child who will turn 5 at the end of June. He seems much more comfortable playing with younger kids and withdraws with kids his age. Ready academically but not socially? I didn’t realize it would be looked down upon.

It’s not looked down on by normal people. DCUM is not a good representative of normal people, unfortunately. But you will be fine.

Naive woman.

+2 Definitely looked down on, even if it is behind your back. Just being honest. May seems a stretch for redshirting.

+3

I'll bet you gossiping, snide, nasty people hold yourselves out to be the "better" families and think awfully highly of yourselves despite how you talk about innocent children. Please do call redshirted kids out so you can alert everyone to what kind of foul people you really are.

Pot calling the kettle.

Are you admitting to being a child on this board? Are you on your mom's phone? Because we are talking about children.

The hypocrisy.

You're still confused.

Yes, I am confused about your bigot ways.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is fascinating. We were planning to hold back child who will turn 5 at the end of June. He seems much more comfortable playing with younger kids and withdraws with kids his age. Ready academically but not socially? I didn’t realize it would be looked down upon.

It’s not looked down on by normal people. DCUM is not a good representative of normal people, unfortunately. But you will be fine.

Naive woman.

+2 Definitely looked down on, even if it is behind your back. Just being honest. May seems a stretch for redshirting.

+3

I'll bet you gossiping, snide, nasty people hold yourselves out to be the "better" families and think awfully highly of yourselves despite how you talk about innocent children. Please do call redshirted kids out so you can alert everyone to what kind of foul people you really are.

Pot calling the kettle.

Are you admitting to being a child on this board? Are you on your mom's phone? Because we are talking about children.

The hypocrisy.

You're still confused.

Yes, I am confused about your bigot ways.

Do backpedal more and be proud of the way you and your child mock and gossip about kids at their school. It's not a good look.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:May is too old. Down the road, kids will begin to notice how much older he is and think he must have been held back. He will be almost a year and a half older than some classmates. There was a kid at our school who was redshirted with a May birthday and he stood out as too old. Ge will turn 7 while in kindergarten! I’m surprised schools allow this. There should be a cut off at some point.

This doesn't happen. I know you like to think it does, but it doesn't and kids do not care about this at all. Only nosy busybody parents.

Oh yes it happens.

No, it really doesn't. I was just at a birthday party for a kindergartener turning 7 and nobody said a thing. My 6 year old kindergartener only thought it was unfair he got to turn 7 first. Someone will always have to be first. My 5th grader is with kids already turning 12. Again, nobody says a thing and the other kids just wish it was their birthday. The insecurity is on the parent's side, not the kids.

+1

It doesn’t happen in real life. One of the most well-liked, nicest kids in my DCs elementary class was a Feb. kid who was a year older. That kid could not have been more well-liked if he tried. And he was the oldest by literally months.

You don't see an issue with having 5 year olds in a class with 7 year olds?

Nope. Look at Montessori programs where there are blended age groups for classes. It’s fine and in fact there are even tangible benefits (older children serving as peer mentors and younger kids learning from them).

Don’t some of you have kids with older siblings? Do they spend time together or do you shelter the younger child from their older sibling too? Seriously, what is the big deal with kids of different ages being in the same class? What a strange issue to fixate on.

Kids should learn how to be with peers of different ages and abilities. That’s part of life.

Maybe your 7 year old should learn to be in class with kids his own age? My 13 year old is with a 15 year old in 8th grade. It is ludicrous. Trust me, my son is not learning beneficial things from his older classmate.

I thought redshirted kids were so unpopular and reviled. Weird that your darling seems so drawn to this one classmate.

Are any others 15 years old around 13 years old?

My kid is an athlete and on sports team with kids older and younger than them. 13-15 year old isn’t a weird range to spend time together and hang out.

A 13 year old and a 15 year old have different academic expectations. If not, then there would be no need for putting kids in specific grades. Many sports teams do follow age. Nice try.

[Anonymous]

Was your child accepted to an ongoing school with a preschool program, or is your preschool suggesting that you hold him back? If the latter, go public and reapply. What you don’t want to do is keep him back and try to apply out next year and find yourself in the same position, but now with a kid who is arguably too old. If he has been accepted to an ongoing school with a preschool program, and has a guaranteed spot at that ongoing school, I think it is less of a problem.

I live in NYC and we had siblings/legacies at my preschool who turned 5 in April, May, and June of their preschool years - the ongoing schools for which they were siblings/legacies had too many old boys that year and made them hang out in preschool for another year. I will agree that at that age, they weren’t teaching the kids any good habits/mentoring younger kids - those kids were the worst behaved of the bunch!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Was your child accepted to an ongoing school with a preschool program, or is your preschool suggesting that you hold him back? If the latter, go public and reapply. What you don’t want to do is keep him back and try to apply out next year and find yourself in the same position, but now with a kid who is arguably too old. If he has been accepted to an ongoing school with a preschool program, and has a guaranteed spot at that ongoing school, I think it is less of a problem.

I live in NYC and we had siblings/legacies at my preschool who turned 5 in April, May, and June of their preschool years - the ongoing schools for which they were siblings/legacies had too many old boys that year and made them hang out in preschool for another year. I will agree that at that age, they weren’t teaching the kids any good habits/mentoring younger kids - those kids were the worst behaved of the bunch!

That should have said turned six in preschool, not five. Even now in an ongoing school, we have first-grade kids who are already eight! And others who haven’t even turned seven (and won’t for months). The huge age span is bizarre (and the older kids are, again, some of the worst behaved).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You’re fine, OP. Our private school has spring boys redshirted all the time. He won’t be the only one. Plus, if admissions suggested it, it means they thought it was appropriate for him. Private school boys tend to be on the older side.

Totally agree with this Mom. My child has an early October birthday so I though she would be the oldest like in preschool abut she is more in the middle of the pack age wise. The older boys in her class are ahead academically and doing great. I was a June birthday and always the youngest -- that extra year would have done me a world of good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:May is too old. Down the road, kids will begin to notice how much older he is and think he must have been held back. He will be almost a year and a half older than some classmates. There was a kid at our school who was redshirted with a May birthday and he stood out as too old. Ge will turn 7 while in kindergarten! I’m surprised schools allow this. There should be a cut off at some point.

This doesn't happen. I know you like to think it does, but it doesn't and kids do not care about this at all. Only nosy busybody parents.

Oh yes it happens.

No, it really doesn't. I was just at a birthday party for a kindergartener turning 7 and nobody said a thing. My 6 year old kindergartener only thought it was unfair he got to turn 7 first. Someone will always have to be first. My 5th grader is with kids already turning 12. Again, nobody says a thing and the other kids just wish it was their birthday. The insecurity is on the parent's side, not the kids.

+1

It doesn’t happen in real life. One of the most well-liked, nicest kids in my DCs elementary class was a Feb. kid who was a year older. That kid could not have been more well-liked if he tried. And he was the oldest by literally months.

You don't see an issue with having 5 year olds in a class with 7 year olds?

Nope. Look at Montessori programs where there are blended age groups for classes. It’s fine and in fact there are even tangible benefits (older children serving as peer mentors and younger kids learning from them).

Don’t some of you have kids with older siblings? Do they spend time together or do you shelter the younger child from their older sibling too? Seriously, what is the big deal with kids of different ages being in the same class? What a strange issue to fixate on.

Kids should learn how to be with peers of different ages and abilities. That’s part of life.

Maybe your 7 year old should learn to be in class with kids his own age? My 13 year old is with a 15 year old in 8th grade. It is ludicrous. Trust me, my son is not learning beneficial things from his older classmate.

I thought redshirted kids were so unpopular and reviled. Weird that your darling seems so drawn to this one classmate.

Are any others 15 years old around 13 years old?

My kid is an athlete and on sports team with kids older and younger than them. 13-15 year old isn’t a weird range to spend time together and hang out.

A 13 year old and a 15 year old have different academic expectations. If not, then there would be no need for putting kids in specific grades. Many sports teams do follow age. Nice try.

So, does you 8th grade middle schooler not take classes by different levels and abilities? Is everyone in their grade in all the same classes?

Still don’t understand why it’s a big deal for your 13 year old to be around an older child.

And yes, lots of sports practice together regardless of age. Take swim team, for example. My other child is a gymnast and they compete by level so are with kids of all different ages. I would never think to make an issue and fuss over it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is fascinating. We were planning to hold back child who will turn 5 at the end of June. He seems much more comfortable playing with younger kids and withdraws with kids his age. Ready academically but not socially? I didn’t realize it would be looked down upon.

It’s not looked down on by normal people. DCUM is not a good representative of normal people, unfortunately. But you will be fine.

Naive woman.

+2 Definitely looked down on, even if it is behind your back. Just being honest. May seems a stretch for redshirting.

+3

I'll bet you gossiping, snide, nasty people hold yourselves out to be the "better" families and think awfully highly of yourselves despite how you talk about innocent children. Please do call redshirted kids out so you can alert everyone to what kind of foul people you really are.

Pot calling the kettle.

Are you admitting to being a child on this board? Are you on your mom's phone? Because we are talking about children.

The hypocrisy.

You're still confused.

Yes, I am confused about your bigot ways.

Do backpedal more and be proud of the way you and your child mock and gossip about kids at their school. It's not a good look.

You’re projecting and the only one who is backpedaling. You claim to be so righteous and your claim about others mocking and making fun of kids, yet that’s precisely what you are doing. Being a hypocrite is not a good look.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:May is too old. Down the road, kids will begin to notice how much older he is and think he must have been held back. He will be almost a year and a half older than some classmates. There was a kid at our school who was redshirted with a May birthday and he stood out as too old. Ge will turn 7 while in kindergarten! I’m surprised schools allow this. There should be a cut off at some point.

This doesn't happen. I know you like to think it does, but it doesn't and kids do not care about this at all. Only nosy busybody parents.

Oh yes it happens.

No, it really doesn't. I was just at a birthday party for a kindergartener turning 7 and nobody said a thing. My 6 year old kindergartener only thought it was unfair he got to turn 7 first. Someone will always have to be first. My 5th grader is with kids already turning 12. Again, nobody says a thing and the other kids just wish it was their birthday. The insecurity is on the parent's side, not the kids.

+1

It doesn’t happen in real life. One of the most well-liked, nicest kids in my DCs elementary class was a Feb. kid who was a year older. That kid could not have been more well-liked if he tried. And he was the oldest by literally months.

You don't see an issue with having 5 year olds in a class with 7 year olds?

Nope. Look at Montessori programs where there are blended age groups for classes. It’s fine and in fact there are even tangible benefits (older children serving as peer mentors and younger kids learning from them).

Don’t some of you have kids with older siblings? Do they spend time together or do you shelter the younger child from their older sibling too? Seriously, what is the big deal with kids of different ages being in the same class? What a strange issue to fixate on.

Kids should learn how to be with peers of different ages and abilities. That’s part of life.

Maybe your 7 year old should learn to be in class with kids his own age? My 13 year old is with a 15 year old in 8th grade. It is ludicrous. Trust me, my son is not learning beneficial things from his older classmate.

I thought redshirted kids were so unpopular and reviled. Weird that your darling seems so drawn to this one classmate.

Are any others 15 years old around 13 years old?

My kid is an athlete and on sports team with kids older and younger than them. 13-15 year old isn’t a weird range to spend time together and hang out.

A 13 year old and a 15 year old have different academic expectations. If not, then there would be no need for putting kids in specific grades. Many sports teams do follow age. Nice try.

So, does you 8th grade middle schooler not take classes by different levels and abilities? Is everyone in their grade in all the same classes?

Still don’t understand why it’s a big deal for your 13 year old to be around an older child.

And yes, lots of sports practice together regardless of age. Take swim team, for example. My other child is a gymnast and they compete by level so are with kids of all different ages. I would never think to make an issue and fuss over it.

Differentiation is not the same situation. Keep trying to reach.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:May is too old. Down the road, kids will begin to notice how much older he is and think he must have been held back. He will be almost a year and a half older than some classmates. There was a kid at our school who was redshirted with a May birthday and he stood out as too old. Ge will turn 7 while in kindergarten! I’m surprised schools allow this. There should be a cut off at some point.

This doesn't happen. I know you like to think it does, but it doesn't and kids do not care about this at all. Only nosy busybody parents.

Oh yes it happens.

No, it really doesn't. I was just at a birthday party for a kindergartener turning 7 and nobody said a thing. My 6 year old kindergartener only thought it was unfair he got to turn 7 first. Someone will always have to be first. My 5th grader is with kids already turning 12. Again, nobody says a thing and the other kids just wish it was their birthday. The insecurity is on the parent's side, not the kids.

+1

It doesn’t happen in real life. One of the most well-liked, nicest kids in my DCs elementary class was a Feb. kid who was a year older. That kid could not have been more well-liked if he tried. And he was the oldest by literally months.

You don't see an issue with having 5 year olds in a class with 7 year olds?

Nope. Look at Montessori programs where there are blended age groups for classes. It’s fine and in fact there are even tangible benefits (older children serving as peer mentors and younger kids learning from them).

Don’t some of you have kids with older siblings? Do they spend time together or do you shelter the younger child from their older sibling too? Seriously, what is the big deal with kids of different ages being in the same class? What a strange issue to fixate on.

Kids should learn how to be with peers of different ages and abilities. That’s part of life.

Maybe your 7 year old should learn to be in class with kids his own age? My 13 year old is with a 15 year old in 8th grade. It is ludicrous. Trust me, my son is not learning beneficial things from his older classmate.

I thought redshirted kids were so unpopular and reviled. Weird that your darling seems so drawn to this one classmate.

Are any others 15 years old around 13 years old?

My kid is an athlete and on sports team with kids older and younger than them. 13-15 year old isn’t a weird range to spend time together and hang out.

A 13 year old and a 15 year old have different academic expectations. If not, then there would be no need for putting kids in specific grades. Many sports teams do follow age. Nice try.

So, does you 8th grade middle schooler not take classes by different levels and abilities? Is everyone in their grade in all the same classes?

Still don’t understand why it’s a big deal for your 13 year old to be around an older child.

And yes, lots of sports practice together regardless of age. Take swim team, for example. My other child is a gymnast and they compete by level so are with kids of all different ages. I would never think to make an issue and fuss over it.

Not my kids basketball team. As it should be, why should 8th grade age kids play high school aged kids?