How To Find A SAHM?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is it only me, or 400k is just not enough money to expect a wife that does not work? It is good money, but if the wife does not work and has some help, that won’t give you a very confortabile lifestyle. I am guessing you want to have 2 or 3 kids. You probably want to send them to Private school and have them do sports and camps, etc... unless you make 800+ your wife should be working so you can have that comfortable lifestyle.
The housewives someone mentioned you could meet at charity events and private schools have hisband’s that make milltions

lol - this is so dcum it hurts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tale as old as time, man seeks traditional woman, but demands modernity when it comes to a prenup.

You want tradition without any downsides.

+1.

Op - the prenup needs to reward her for staying home with children. Something like - 50% of any assets earned after the marriage date.

Even then, gosh this is so transactional. Again, don’t see why you should get married!

This is the math that is needed to make the pre-nup fair — 50% of the post-marital net asset increase of your share of the business. The problem is if your business is worth a million now, and it increases to 10 million by the time you divorce, you will owe her 5 million and you may not have 5 mill cash sitting around. Maybe you’ll have to refinance to pull cash out of the business or maybe her payout is structured with a large lump sum initially and tbe rest paid out over time.

If she is a SAHM, she is absolutely and equal partner to you in your business - you are pushing off tons of other house and family work on you and you get the benefit of her labor which you are investing in your business.

She needs her own attorney and she needs to be able to negotiate the prenup. there are a lot of other concerns I would have. How much will you participate in the family - weekly dinners, bed and bath time, weekend time? How much will you put into a retirement account for her each year? How much extra help will she have access to — nanny? housekeeper? cook? will she have free time to herself. will you pay for healthcare paot divorce but pre medicaid. will she work when the kids are in elementary. will she keep her salary? how will you split bills? will she get access to higher education? what will the custody arrangement be if you divorce? will the marriage be monogamous or not?

If she doesn’t have her own lawyer and she can’t negotiate pre-nup details, then you aren’t really being fair.

[Anonymous]

OP, you’re getting a bit long in the tooth for all this. You’re 37–realistically, it will take you a bit of time to meet a woman, date her, propose, marry, and impregnate. By that time you will be 40 and your sperm will be over the hill. You’ll have special needs children, who are expensive and will require lots of time, being taken to therapies, etc. Face it, you missed the boat on this. Your fantasy marriage is just that, a fantasy.

[Anonymous]

I think you sound like a great catch and are offering up an lifestyle that many woman would love to be part of.
37 years old is still young.
DC is such a lousy place for dating, but I am certain you can and will meet someone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dude, you aren’t that rich. $400k is not huge salary around here with kids.

How many kids? $40-50k/year private school for each. $6k each for travel sports.

$2 million for a house in any great neighborhood.

I make what you do. I’m a woman.

OP here. I have plenty of money saved which is why I want a prenup.

[Anonymous]

Here. You can find a SAHM here. I will have your babies, clean house, etc. You will need to pay off my student loans and provide me an allowance, with a separate personal shopping stipend, and keep me in a late model car. Leasing is fine if you end up needing to do that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anyone else getting abusive red flags from OP?

Nope, he's a troll. An attractive, mentally healthy, successful guy will not be single at 37.

OP here. Would you say this about a woman? I put my career over marriage. Many people are waiting until later in life to settle down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Serious question - why have kids if you don't really want anything to do with them?

If you want to be hands-off and continue working 80 hour weeks, just stay a bachelor and become an awesome uncle.

It's not okay to bring children into this world if you're not totally invested in it. And I don't mean financially - children would rather have an involved parent than college tuition or a car.

OP here. I want kids and will be involved. I’m not much of a baby person, and I don’t think many men are. I want to work as much as I can and have my family set for life so when they get schools aged, I’m able to be more invested in their life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dude, you aren’t that rich. $400k is not huge salary around here with kids.

How many kids? $40-50k/year private school for each. $6k each for travel sports.

$2 million for a house in any great neighborhood.

I make what you do. I’m a woman.

Same. OP you suffer from minor to large delusions of grandeur. Forget luring some woman into this ludicrous arrangement; I'm not even hearing that you can afford the life you want. SAH spouse with kid(s) undoubtedly in private school and household help in the right neighborhood in the DC area? Unless you already own the house or have socked away a small fortune, come back when you add a zero to that income.

OP here. I have a net worth of almost $5million. I’m good and can afford it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I get where you are coming from and don’t think you are crazy. Protecting a business that you have built seems like an okay goal. But you are approaching this like the woman won’t be giving up things, too. Divorced women with children are a very financially vulnerable population and you seem to forget that someone who gives us their career isn’t just giving up their salary, they are giving up many years of salary growth and ability to renewer the workforce and support herself.

Your pre-nup needs to account for that trade-off.

I think many women enjoy staying home with the kids but without assurance that they won’t be living in a 2-bedroom apartment barely holding things together if you decide you are ready for something new, it’s not going to be a good proposition for the “smart” woman you are hoping to find.

This.

If I were OP's gf, I'd demand a pre-nup. But it would state that in the event of a divorce, I'd be set for life.

Yup. 200k/year for each year married for first 5 years. Subject to going up from there to adjust for inflation and COL.

Yes OP, would you be willing to sign a prenup?

OP here. I would sign a prenup.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Make a ton of money. A fair amount of women would be willing to do the bulk of of the child/household work, so long as you make plenty to provide a good lifestyle and house help when she needs/wants it, since you aren’t willing to pitch in. She will also want to make sure, in the event of divorce, that her “half” will be still be a lot and keep her comfortable , since she pretty much gave up a career and even if she goes back to work, so won’t make nearly what she could have or once did.

OP here. I was in a relationship that just ended here I thought I found the one. We were very in love and happy but she refused to sign a prenup. I own multiple businesses and have a decent net worth. A prenup is non-negotiable. Most women do not want to sign one.

Be sure to lead with that in your dating profile! Bwahaha

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dude, you aren’t that rich. $400k is not huge salary around here with kids.

How many kids? $40-50k/year private school for each. $6k each for travel sports.

$2 million for a house in any great neighborhood.

I make what you do. I’m a woman.

Same. OP you suffer from minor to large delusions of grandeur. Forget luring some woman into this ludicrous arrangement; I'm not even hearing that you can afford the life you want. SAH spouse with kid(s) undoubtedly in private school and household help in the right neighborhood in the DC area? Unless you already own the house or have socked away a small fortune, come back when you add a zero to that income.

OP here. I have a net worth of almost $5million. I’m good and can afford it.

"I want to work as much as I can and have my family set for life so when they get schools aged"

Your story makes less sense with each post.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, you’re getting a bit long in the tooth for all this. You’re 37–realistically, it will take you a bit of time to meet a woman, date her, propose, marry, and impregnate. By that time you will be 40 and your sperm will be over the hill. You’ll have special needs children, who are expensive and will require lots of time, being taken to therapies, etc. Face it, you missed the boat on this. Your fantasy marriage is just that, a fantasy.

Not on OPs side but this is a load of bull. So a 40 year old man will automatically have special needs children? Go get an education. Many men over that age have kids who are not special needs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Serious question - why have kids if you don't really want anything to do with them?

If you want to be hands-off and continue working 80 hour weeks, just stay a bachelor and become an awesome uncle.

It's not okay to bring children into this world if you're not totally invested in it. And I don't mean financially - children would rather have an involved parent than college tuition or a car.

OP here. I want kids and will be involved. I’m not much of a baby person, and I don’t think many men are. I want to work as much as I can and have my family set for life so when they get schools aged, I’m able to be more invested in their life.

Well, apparently most women aren’t much of a douche person, which is why you’re having such trouble finding a wife.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you’re getting a bit long in the tooth for all this. You’re 37–realistically, it will take you a bit of time to meet a woman, date her, propose, marry, and impregnate. By that time you will be 40 and your sperm will be over the hill. You’ll have special needs children, who are expensive and will require lots of time, being taken to therapies, etc. Face it, you missed the boat on this. Your fantasy marriage is just that, a fantasy.

Not on OPs side but this is a load of bull. So a 40 year old man will automatically have special needs children? Go get an education. Many men over that age have kids who are not special needs.

It’s scientifically proven that old sperm isn’t as healthy as young sperm. Sorry, geezer.