38F - OLD apps: not getting any matches

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have been on the apps on and off since I separated from my STBXH. I am looking to gently dip a toe in dating and…it’s not going well!

My stats:

5’0 118lbs
Brunette with nice skin and classic style
UVA grad making 130k
I am told I am quite pretty and sweet. I have no idea why I’m receiving no matches!

It is very demoralizing.

Please don't listen to some of the guys on here, I would expect you would be getting more matches as well. I am 41, 5'10" and am getting tons of matches and dates. For me you are a bit below my height range, but if you had something in your profile that really stood out I would be more interested. For me at least, I agree with others, please don't put photos with kids on or at least put in there that you love kids and it is your niece. Also what are you putting as your career? I'm looking for a partner not someone to support. So I am sorry for any nurses or teachers out there you are competing with lawyers, engineers, doctors, directors etc. Lastly, are you fully filling out your profile? There are hundreds of 38F profiles so you need to stand out.

For other photo advice, I can say that every woman seems to take the same 6 photos so if you can show a bit more personality that would help. I always see: holding a class of wine, hugging a dog (same three breeds), photo hiking (great falls or skyline), photo with group of friends that makes me question where you are. All of my best dates have been with someone with a really great/unusual photo and something in their profile that is bold and showed real personality

So a nurse practitioner making $200k wouldn’t be competitive enough for you ?

[Anonymous]

I think it’s the age and kid factors. Men age 35-40 who are unmarried and want kids aren’t looking for a 38 year old woman, they want someone 35 and under. Men who already have kids but who are single don’t want more kids at this point. People roughly OP’s age who got married in their mid or late 20s and then divorced relatively quickly are probably remarried by now; people who are on the way to divorce but are sticking it out until the kids are a bit older (HS age+) are still married. It’s a weird time. Like I could absolutely see how the 50 year old woman got a lot of matches because it’s just a different time in her life.

I would say if OP wants a kid she should look into becoming a single mom by choice.

[Anonymous]

You are chunky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are chunky.

She posted a pic a while back which has since been deleted. She is a very curvy 5’0”. Not fat, but not “slim” either.

There are plenty of men who like that look, but they are not the same men who like thin petite women. OP is simply unrealistic about her wants and what she brings to the table as a 38F at her size.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are chunky.

She posted a pic a while back which has since been deleted. She is a very curvy 5’0”. Not fat, but not “slim” either.

There are plenty of men who like that look, but they are not the same men who like thin petite women. OP is simply unrealistic about her wants and what she brings to the table as a 38F at her size.

She posted a photo? Oh, OP. Just no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're short and fat. And you won't date short men. And the tall men can do waaaaay better. I can't believe you didn't figure this out on your own.

OP is slim. The rest is true.

OP is not slim. She is average, which is fine. Men looking for very thin women won’t be interested.

She's fat. My wife is 5 ft 1 and 108 and she is normal.

Why do you track your wife’s weight? That’s straight up weird.

Knowing = "tracking"? You are the weird one.

[Anonymous]

38 is pretty old in the eyes of most men in the age group she is looking at. She needs to up the age to mid 50s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are chunky.

She posted a pic a while back which has since been deleted. She is a very curvy 5’0”. Not fat, but not “slim” either.

There are plenty of men who like that look, but they are not the same men who like thin petite women. OP is simply unrealistic about her wants and what she brings to the table as a 38F at her size.

Where is the pic?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:38 is pretty old in the eyes of most men in the age group she is looking at. She needs to up the age to mid 50s.

What are you talking about ? I’m 48 never dated anyone more than 5 years older. Mid 50s man is unlikely to want kids, and he will be too low energy to run after a new toddler.
Of course 38 is young. It’s just men her age group are at different life stages by now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:118 pounds at 5'0 is a normal BMI for a woman.

It’s not thin though. For reference I am 5’8” and 124. BMI 18. That is slim. She is a full 8 inches shorter and only 6 pounds lighter. She may still be plenty attractive but slim she is not.

You are clinically underweight. Please don’t bring this ana shit into DCUM.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:118 pounds at 5'0 is a normal BMI for a woman.

It’s not thin though. For reference I am 5’8” and 124. BMI 18. That is slim. She is a full 8 inches shorter and only 6 pounds lighter. She may still be plenty attractive but slim she is not.

You are clinically underweight. Please don’t bring this ana shit into DCUM.

+1.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:38 is pretty old in the eyes of most men in the age group she is looking at. She needs to up the age to mid 50s.

What are you talking about ? I’m 48 never dated anyone more than 5 years older. Mid 50s man is unlikely to want kids, and he will be too low energy to run after a new toddler.
Of course 38 is young. It’s just men her age group are at different life stages by now.

I'm saying that single men who dont want kids and are mid 40s aren't looking at their peers . They are looking at the late 20s to early 30s. Trust me, I was one once.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:38 is pretty old in the eyes of most men in the age group she is looking at. She needs to up the age to mid 50s.

What are you talking about ? I’m 48 never dated anyone more than 5 years older. Mid 50s man is unlikely to want kids, and he will be too low energy to run after a new toddler.
Of course 38 is young. It’s just men her age group are at different life stages by now.

She’s too old for the young guys but too young for the old guys. Especially when you factor wanting a kid into the picture. If she didn’t want kids, totally different story.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:118 pounds at 5'0 is a normal BMI for a woman.

It’s not thin though. For reference I am 5’8” and 124. BMI 18. That is slim. She is a full 8 inches shorter and only 6 pounds lighter. She may still be plenty attractive but slim she is not.

You are clinically underweight. Please don’t bring this ana shit into DCUM.

Yeah I had to keep double checking BMI calculators to make sure they didn't change the standards.

OP, I'm sure your body type is fine. Ignore the trolls.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, if you get your BMI down to 20 and get better pics you will get plenty of interest. Sorry to say it, but I get way more attention from men with a BMI of 19 than I got when I had a BMI of 23. They are so shallow.

Men wanting a certain weight is shallow but women wanting a certain height is not?