38F - OLD apps: not getting any matches

[Anonymous]

Ditch photo with niece
Set age filter to 55
Reduce height requirement

[Anonymous]

Op here. The responses here make me want to cry. Should I try to make it work with my STBX? He was 5’10 and had a grad degree. I miss him so much already!

But he didn’t want the married with kids life; at least with me!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Male opinion. I don't think she's being too picky at all. Her filters are about what I'd expect. It's a mystery why she's not getting any matches - especially because there are guys who spam likes on every woman on the site.

Op here. Maybe I’m ugly. 😩

Pinkmirror.com is brutally honest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here. The responses here make me want to cry. Should I try to make it work with my STBX? He was 5’10 and had a grad degree. I miss him so much already!

But he didn’t want the married with kids life; at least with me!

NO! He cheated on you. Don’t throw bad years after good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. The responses here make me want to cry. Should I try to make it work with my STBX? He was 5’10 and had a grad degree. I miss him so much already!

But he didn’t want the married with kids life; at least with me!

NO! He cheated on you. Don’t throw bad years after good.

OP, that is so messed up. You should miss his company or his character. Please go to a therapist. Otherwise, you’ll just choose another loser.

[Anonymous]

1. Slightly sexier photos, with a mix of full body and face. Not vulgar! But outfits and poses that flatter your figure. Good lighting. A pic is worth a thousand words, OP. It's important that each photo be a really good quality shot. Work with a photog if you must. People do this for LinkedIn, you can do this for finding a mate.

2. Get rid of that ridiculous height requirement. Seriously, you can live with a 5'5" man, and they might be a lot more interested and loyal, given they don't often get matches.

3. Personally, I would not get rid of the academic requirement. An undergrad degree is really a basic minimum in a way that height isn't - but that's just me.

4. No pictures of kids! What's wrong with you?! You're signaling you're a single mother and/or calling for pedos.

[Anonymous]

Are you not getting any hits on multiple apps? Because that’s uncommon. There must be a red flag on your profile, or your pics are bad. Most men don’t even read the profile when swiping.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you not getting any hits on multiple apps? Because that’s uncommon. There must be a red flag on your profile, or your pics are bad. Most men don’t even read the profile when swiping.

Op here I don’t photograph well

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you not getting any hits on multiple apps? Because that’s uncommon. There must be a red flag on your profile, or your pics are bad. Most men don’t even read the profile when swiping.

Op here I don’t photograph well

You need a professional photographer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ditch photo with niece
Set age filter to 55
Reduce height requirement

Uh, no. You are better off single forever than taking on a man 17 years older than you. If you really want to have kids, having them as a true single mom is way better than having little kids plus an elderly husband to care for.

OP, it's natural that you feel your biological clock ticking, but remember that no husband is sooooooo much better than a bad husband.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you not getting any hits on multiple apps? Because that’s uncommon. There must be a red flag on your profile, or your pics are bad. Most men don’t even read the profile when swiping.

Op here I don’t photograph well

Try Lisa Damico photography in Alexandria, she does a great job of taking photos for dating that don't look artificial.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're 5'0 and you want a man at least 5'9? Now you know how short men feel when they never get picked.

About 57% of the men in the US are at least 5'9", but when you add in your other reuqirements (education), that % will go down a lot. Only about 36% of men in their 30s' in the US have a college degree.. so those 2 requirements alone reduces you to about 20% of the male dating pool.

Oh and by comparison, only 6% of women in the US are 5'0" or shorter.

So.. you're in the bottom 6% height-wise, and searching for a man who is stastically rare.

OP don’t listen to this nonsense. Of course if you are college educated yourself you should not settle for anyone who is not. Ridiculous fantasy from some incel male.

College educated men are looking for college educated women so this isn’t a barrier, it’s an advantage.

There's nothing stopping her from having the height and education filter without stating them overtly. She just has to swipe left on the guys who "like" her who are short or uneducated. And usually the filters don't stop guys from "liking" you anyway - they either ignore them or lie. That's what's so weird about her not getting any matches.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You're 5'0 and you want a man at least 5'9? Now you know how short men feel when they never get picked.

About 57% of the men in the US are at least 5'9", but when you add in your other reuqirements (education), that % will go down a lot. Only about 36% of men in their 30s' in the US have a college degree.. so those 2 requirements alone reduces you to about 20% of the male dating pool.

Oh and by comparison, only 6% of women in the US are 5'0" or shorter.

So.. you're in the bottom 6% height-wise, and searching for a man who is stastically rare.

Yeah that part gives me major ick, OP. Makes me assume you're very entitled in general.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're 5'0 and you want a man at least 5'9? Now you know how short men feel when they never get picked.

About 57% of the men in the US are at least 5'9", but when you add in your other reuqirements (education), that % will go down a lot. Only about 36% of men in their 30s' in the US have a college degree.. so those 2 requirements alone reduces you to about 20% of the male dating pool.

Oh and by comparison, only 6% of women in the US are 5'0" or shorter.

So.. you're in the bottom 6% height-wise, and searching for a man who is stastically rare.

OP don’t listen to this nonsense. Of course if you are college educated yourself you should not settle for anyone who is not. Ridiculous fantasy from some incel male.

College educated men are looking for college educated women so this isn’t a barrier, it’s an advantage.

I would argue that having a degree is an advantage. Only being willing to date guys with degrees limits you. I personally a family of millionaires who work for themselves. It’s rare, sure. Nobody is suggesting OP date the farmers from WV with some high school. Just don’t discount the guys who own their own businesses, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're 5'0 and you want a man at least 5'9? Now you know how short men feel when they never get picked.

About 57% of the men in the US are at least 5'9", but when you add in your other reuqirements (education), that % will go down a lot. Only about 36% of men in their 30s' in the US have a college degree.. so those 2 requirements alone reduces you to about 20% of the male dating pool.

Oh and by comparison, only 6% of women in the US are 5'0" or shorter.

So.. you're in the bottom 6% height-wise, and searching for a man who is stastically rare.

OP don’t listen to this nonsense. Of course if you are college educated yourself you should not settle for anyone who is not. Ridiculous fantasy from some incel male.

College educated men are looking for college educated women so this isn’t a barrier, it’s an advantage.

I would argue that having a degree is an advantage. Only being willing to date guys with degrees limits you. I personally a family of millionaires who work for themselves. It’s rare, sure. Nobody is suggesting OP date the farmers from WV with some high school. Just don’t discount the guys who own their own businesses, OP.

Same. My parents didn't go to college but earned 7-figures starting in the early 90s from their business. I wouldn't filter for education; you can get a good sense of a person's intelligence and financial compatibility on the first 3 days without using an undergraduate degree as a hard stop. At 38 with a shrinking fertility window and a strong desire to have a child, you need to be open-minded. There may be a 5'4 intelligent hustler out there who never finished his degree but would be a great husband to you.