Making sure partner isn’t a creep

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sadly moms boyfriend is more likely to abuse her kids than dads girlfriend. My ex wife let her boyfriend move in. I told my son to watch over his sister. There is nothing I can do about this. All I can do is hope and pray he is who he told her he was.

That's why you choose someone whose not a) selfish b)selfish

My mom never left my dad though he was a liar/player. One of her reasons was she didn't want to remarry and risk a boyfriend abusing her kids.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I’m a widow with a 6 year old daughter. My current partner would like to get married. I love him and think he’s wonderful. Something that gives me pause is that as a child one of my aunts married a pedophile who ended up abusing her kids. I don’t want to introduce anything like that to my kid.

For those of you who remarried with kids, how did you determine your new partner wasn’t an abuser?

If you don't know this person well enough to not be sure he isn't a.child abuser then why are you even anywhere close to talking marriage.

If you have a shred of doubt he might be an abuser why are you in a relationship with him at all.

What the actual

All this. How are you spreading your legs for someone who you think might want to spread your daughters’?

You are an idiot. You never know anyone, ever. You think any mother went along with a new man in the house thinking they would ever abuse their children? What a stupid comment you made!

I said what I said. I would never sleep with anyone I thought could potentially abuse a child. Apparently OP is doing so. So who’s the idiot here?

You have to be a virgin then, because by your standard you can never ever know.

Nope. Most men aren’t molesters. A lot of women have terrible pickers, though.

So it's...it's a woman's fault if her partner molests her child? It is the molester's fault.

In the broadest sense, yes, it is her fault. She invited this person into their lives. Most men don’t molest, yet somehow she blew past the normal men and chose someone who hurts her child. She’s probably either deeply damaged herself, or desperate for male companionship, for any number of reasons. Or both.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sadly moms boyfriend is more likely to abuse her kids than dads girlfriend. My ex wife let her boyfriend move in. I told my son to watch over his sister. There is nothing I can do about this. All I can do is hope and pray he is who he told her he was.

That's why you choose someone whose not a) selfish b)selfish

My mom never left my dad though he was a liar/player. One of her reasons was she didn't want to remarry and risk a boyfriend abusing her kids.

My mom, too. Unfortunately, she never dealt with her childhood abuse. While my dad was off carousing, she was drinking and abusing me. I escaped by going out and I was abused by a psycho boyfriend. When I tried to get help from her, she blamed me. Meanwhile, my dad came and went as he pleased and just generally ignored me.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I’m a widow with a 6 year old daughter. My current partner would like to get married. I love him and think he’s wonderful. Something that gives me pause is that as a child one of my aunts married a pedophile who ended up abusing her kids. I don’t want to introduce anything like that to my kid.

For those of you who remarried with kids, how did you determine your new partner wasn’t an abuser?

If you don't know this person well enough to not be sure he isn't a.child abuser then why are you even anywhere close to talking marriage.

If you have a shred of doubt he might be an abuser why are you in a relationship with him at all.

What the actual

All this. How are you spreading your legs for someone who you think might want to spread your daughters’?

You are an idiot. You never know anyone, ever. You think any mother went along with a new man in the house thinking they would ever abuse their children? What a stupid comment you made!

I said what I said. I would never sleep with anyone I thought could potentially abuse a child. Apparently OP is doing so. So who’s the idiot here?

You have to be a virgin then, because by your standard you can never ever know.

Nope. Most men aren’t molesters. A lot of women have terrible pickers, though.

So it's...it's a woman's fault if her partner molests her child? It is the molester's fault.

In the broadest sense, yes, it is her fault. She invited this person into their lives. Most men don’t molest, yet somehow she blew past the normal men and chose someone who hurts her child. She’s probably either deeply damaged herself, or desperate for male companionship, for any number of reasons. Or both.

It is the mother's responsibility to protect her children. 100% The person who actually physically abuses or molests the child is ar fault, though. If I had my way, child molesters and rapists would be receiving capital punishment. Mothers and other enablers/ignorers/facilitators of that abuse would spend 30 years in prison. Unfortunately, our society does not value children or women, so child abuse largely goes unreported and unprosecuted. There is no justice for many of us who suffered abuse as children. The worst part of it all is knowing one's mother stood by and did nothing to protect you.