Genuinely asking both parties: where do you want friends/family relationships to go from here?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have written off the other side. Truly I want nothing to do with these morons who vote against their own interest and those of others

Yup.
It’s a question of morals, not political differences.

OK, so…then what? You want the majority of the country to be “immoral and unreachable,” and you want your party to keep losing again and again, because without any connection or healing of division or understanding, this is going to be it going forward? What do you want? Where do you want to go from here?

I’m tired of being in the only party that keeps looking for connection and healing. At least for now, I’m writing people off.

OP here. When I think about my family members who voted for Trump, I don’t think they want disconnect. They’ve never stopped talking to me or inviting me or wanting good things for me and my family. I think they are hurt that “people think I’m racist because I voted for Trump” but they can’t make the connection because, to them, racism means white hoods and burning crosses, and nothing else. Sexism means you, personally, wouldn’t hire a woman or have made a woman uncomfortable at work.

So I would say the Trump voters I know want more unity and for the tension to lessen, but they think that means liberals should “get over” Trump, and they genuinely don’t see why that is problematic. They think it’s “the same” as if Trump were John McCain or Mitt Romney or someone else who ran for president as Republican in recent memories. They truly don’t get why This is Different.

So given how everyone thinks and feels and views “the other side,” what is the actual best and most productive way forward? Do you honestly think “writing people off” is going to get Democrats power back in two or four years? How? How would that possibly work?

I'm a Trump voter in DC, OP, and I would say all of this is true. I get that my many Democratic friends are smarting a bit over this election; I've been around long enough to have been on the losing side of many campaigns. But I moved on and so should they.

The country has spoken. Loudly, in fact. If you don't like it, I would submit that you consider how you, your party and other Dems might just be the ones out of step, and do some real soul-searching.

And yes, of course, I expect to move on from this in conversation and can we have lunch next week?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: I hope all the Trump voters and people who sat out the election get exactly what they chose.

Yes but then all the anti-Trump Harris voters will get that too…everyone is punished. To what end?

To the end of making people see how harmful this is, and hopefully choosing something better next time

We're all just stupid optimists like that

I’m so sick of hearing that “people just need to see how harmful Trump is and then this won’t happen again.” On Trump’s second time getting elected. If people didn’t learn that the first time, they ain’t gonna learn it now.

Then I don't know what to say. We tried. We failed.

[Anonymous]

Our family has dual citizenship in a EU country. We’ve been primarily us based but now thinking more seriously about options to live primarily in EU. Financially we’re banking gains a while longer and will then reduce exposure. No interest in remaining connected to family who are Trump voters (because in my family these people are mean-spirited racists) so no loss there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have written off the other side. Truly I want nothing to do with these morons who vote against their own interest and those of others

Yup.
It’s a question of morals, not political differences.

OK, so…then what? You want the majority of the country to be “immoral and unreachable,” and you want your party to keep losing again and again, because without any connection or healing of division or understanding, this is going to be it going forward? What do you want? Where do you want to go from here?

I’m tired of being in the only party that keeps looking for connection and healing. At least for now, I’m writing people off.

OP here. When I think about my family members who voted for Trump, I don’t think they want disconnect. They’ve never stopped talking to me or inviting me or wanting good things for me and my family. I think they are hurt that “people think I’m racist because I voted for Trump” but they can’t make the connection because, to them, racism means white hoods and burning crosses, and nothing else. Sexism means you, personally, wouldn’t hire a woman or have made a woman uncomfortable at work.

So I would say the Trump voters I know want more unity and for the tension to lessen, but they think that means liberals should “get over” Trump, and they genuinely don’t see why that is problematic. They think it’s “the same” as if Trump were John McCain or Mitt Romney or someone else who ran for president as Republican in recent memories. They truly don’t get why This is Different.

So given how everyone thinks and feels and views “the other side,” what is the actual best and most productive way forward? Do you honestly think “writing people off” is going to get Democrats power back in two or four years? How? How would that possibly work?

I'm a Trump voter in DC, OP, and I would say all of this is true. I get that my many Democratic friends are smarting a bit over this election; I've been around long enough to have been on the losing side of many campaigns. But I moved on and so should they.

The country has spoken. Loudly, in fact. If you don't like it, I would submit that you consider how you, your party and other Dems might just be the ones out of step, and do some real soul-searching.

And yes, of course, I expect to move on from this in conversation and can we have lunch next week?

My answer would be no, I will not have lunch with you.

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have written off the other side. Truly I want nothing to do with these morons who vote against their own interest and those of others

Yup.
It’s a question of morals, not political differences.

OK, so…then what? You want the majority of the country to be “immoral and unreachable,” and you want your party to keep losing again and again, because without any connection or healing of division or understanding, this is going to be it going forward? What do you want? Where do you want to go from here?

I’m tired of being in the only party that keeps looking for connection and healing. At least for now, I’m writing people off.

OP here. When I think about my family members who voted for Trump, I don’t think they want disconnect. They’ve never stopped talking to me or inviting me or wanting good things for me and my family. I think they are hurt that “people think I’m racist because I voted for Trump” but they can’t make the connection because, to them, racism means white hoods and burning crosses, and nothing else. Sexism means you, personally, wouldn’t hire a woman or have made a woman uncomfortable at work.

So I would say the Trump voters I know want more unity and for the tension to lessen, but they think that means liberals should “get over” Trump, and they genuinely don’t see why that is problematic. They think it’s “the same” as if Trump were John McCain or Mitt Romney or someone else who ran for president as Republican in recent memories. They truly don’t get why This is Different.

So given how everyone thinks and feels and views “the other side,” what is the actual best and most productive way forward? Do you honestly think “writing people off” is going to get Democrats power back in two or four years? How? How would that possibly work?

I'm a Trump voter in DC, OP, and I would say all of this is true. I get that my many Democratic friends are smarting a bit over this election; I've been around long enough to have been on the losing side of many campaigns. But I moved on and so should they.

The country has spoken. Loudly, in fact. If you don't like it, I would submit that you consider how you, your party and other Dems might just be the ones out of step, and do some real soul-searching.

And yes, of course, I expect to move on from this in conversation and can we have lunch next week?

My answer would be no, I will not have lunch with you.

Not PP, but I’m curious. Are we over forever? Where do we go from here? And why aren’t you telling people you’re done forever?

[Anonymous]

I don't want to talk politics with people. I didn't before the election either. I am lifelong democrat. I see why people voted for Kamala but think Trump is an abhorent rapist felon who is only out for himself and is a fascist.


I won't be friends with anyone who takes action to prevent the democratic process or is actively racist or fascist. If people undercut science and spread misinformation I will speak out.

But cutting off people about how they voted in this election seems short sighted. I have friends and colleagues with religions I think have terrible practices that they support, with jobs with cultures that make me uncomfortable and many other things. There are things I don't like about just about everyone, including myself. There are no absolutes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I want is simple. I want to not discuss politics nonstop at family get togethers. We voted for Trump. Everyone else in the family voted for Harris. My parents and one of my siblings can only discuss their hatred for Trump now. That’s the only topic of conversation.

I didn’t grow up in a house where politics was the main conversation, ever. There are a lot of grandkids involved. My kids don’t want to go there now since all they do is yell about Trump 24/7. There are millions of other things we can talk about as a family. As the kids about their lives. Come to one of their sports events. I want them to think about life other than Trump.

Dp. That is impodsible now that your Dear Leader is going to be in our face for four years. I hope your family cuts you off.

It’s the opposite. My kids don’t want to see their grandparents and it makes me really sad. It is not because they voted for Harris. It’s because they can’t talk about anything other than politics now and it’s exhausting. We don’t love Trump. I don’t even like him. I regret ever participating in their conversations. But come on, talk to the kids about something else. None of the grandkids can even vote!

How sad you voted for someone you didn't even like. It hasn't even been a week and you expect people to care about your stupid soccer game when the whole world is on fire and so many people are in a world of pain over this one man.

If your kids don't have any empathy than perhaps it is best they stay away from their family. Even if they can't vote your family knows you are all for Trump, the felon and sexual predator. Congrats on your victory. Hope you don't have daughters.

I liked Harris even less. You sound like my family. It’s toxic and this is the type of conversation my children have been hearing for months and are sick of. Frankly, I am sick of it too and try to change the subject.

Are you saying Trump is a better person than Vice President Harris? Trump has raped women and bragged about assaulting them. Trump calls veterans 'suckers'. He calls his opponents childish names. He gets others to do his dirty work so he can deny any involvement. He failed and continues to say the election in 202 was stolen. He has never conceded even today. Harris conceded and is planning on participating in the peaceful transfer of power. That alone should give her more respect than him.

I haven’t read every post but see you responded to mine. I think Trump is an awful person. What I meant is I felt he would be better as a president. Morally, I thought Bill Clinton was an awful person too. As a wife, I don’t see see how Hilary could have stayed with Bill. But I can separate the person from how I think they would run our country. I think Trump would do a better job running the country than Harris. That’s why I voted for him. It was that simple.

As for my family, I think they are behaving poorly in front of their grandchildren. If you reread all of my posts, they never once are trying to cut us off or freeze us out. They just won’t stop the nonstop Trump talk. It’s been going on for months. The grandchildren don’t want to be around it and would like a little attention. OP asked how we move on and i suggested families get back to basics. For example in my situation, it would be nice for grandparents to show interest in grandchildren instead of Trump hate. No, they are not threatening to cut us off. They just want to obsess over politics when the kids don’t care.

Wait what? Why would “an awful person” be a good president?

He was the president before. Things were better. Much better. We have given you reasons. And come on, do you have a job? Don’t you know people who you don’t like as people but they are competent at their job? This is why we aren’t friends with our coworkers. The person next to me has had affairs and is generally nasty to everyone at work. She’d fine to clients and gets the job done. Her personal life doesn’t affect work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have written off the other side. Truly I want nothing to do with these morons who vote against their own interest and those of others

Yup.
It’s a question of morals, not political differences.

OK, so…then what? You want the majority of the country to be “immoral and unreachable,” and you want your party to keep losing again and again, because without any connection or healing of division or understanding, this is going to be it going forward? What do you want? Where do you want to go from here?

I’m tired of being in the only party that keeps looking for connection and healing. At least for now, I’m writing people off.

OP here. When I think about my family members who voted for Trump, I don’t think they want disconnect. They’ve never stopped talking to me or inviting me or wanting good things for me and my family. I think they are hurt that “people think I’m racist because I voted for Trump” but they can’t make the connection because, to them, racism means white hoods and burning crosses, and nothing else. Sexism means you, personally, wouldn’t hire a woman or have made a woman uncomfortable at work.

So I would say the Trump voters I know want more unity and for the tension to lessen, but they think that means liberals should “get over” Trump, and they genuinely don’t see why that is problematic. They think it’s “the same” as if Trump were John McCain or Mitt Romney or someone else who ran for president as Republican in recent memories. They truly don’t get why This is Different.

So given how everyone thinks and feels and views “the other side,” what is the actual best and most productive way forward? Do you honestly think “writing people off” is going to get Democrats power back in two or four years? How? How would that possibly work?

I'm a Trump voter in DC, OP, and I would say all of this is true. I get that my many Democratic friends are smarting a bit over this election; I've been around long enough to have been on the losing side of many campaigns. But I moved on and so should they.

The country has spoken. Loudly, in fact. If you don't like it, I would submit that you consider how you, your party and other Dems might just be the ones out of step, and do some real soul-searching.

And yes, of course, I expect to move on from this in conversation and can we have lunch next week?

OP here, I would love to! Thank you so much for responding.

My soul-searching has already begun. I used to be a Republican (as in when I was 18 and voted in my first election), I’m from a “red state,” and most of my family are working-class Republicans, some are middle class Republicans. I’m grateful for the conversations and connections I have with my family. We don’t talk about politics a ton, but we do sometimes. It helps to hear their perspective. And I’m sure it would be interesting to hear yours!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have written off the other side. Truly I want nothing to do with these morons who vote against their own interest and those of others

Yup.
It’s a question of morals, not political differences.

OK, so…then what? You want the majority of the country to be “immoral and unreachable,” and you want your party to keep losing again and again, because without any connection or healing of division or understanding, this is going to be it going forward? What do you want? Where do you want to go from here?

I’m tired of being in the only party that keeps looking for connection and healing. At least for now, I’m writing people off.

OP here. When I think about my family members who voted for Trump, I don’t think they want disconnect. They’ve never stopped talking to me or inviting me or wanting good things for me and my family. I think they are hurt that “people think I’m racist because I voted for Trump” but they can’t make the connection because, to them, racism means white hoods and burning crosses, and nothing else. Sexism means you, personally, wouldn’t hire a woman or have made a woman uncomfortable at work.

So I would say the Trump voters I know want more unity and for the tension to lessen, but they think that means liberals should “get over” Trump, and they genuinely don’t see why that is problematic. They think it’s “the same” as if Trump were John McCain or Mitt Romney or someone else who ran for president as Republican in recent memories. They truly don’t get why This is Different.

So given how everyone thinks and feels and views “the other side,” what is the actual best and most productive way forward? Do you honestly think “writing people off” is going to get Democrats power back in two or four years? How? How would that possibly work?

I'm a Trump voter in DC, OP, and I would say all of this is true. I get that my many Democratic friends are smarting a bit over this election; I've been around long enough to have been on the losing side of many campaigns. But I moved on and so should they.

The country has spoken. Loudly, in fact. If you don't like it, I would submit that you consider how you, your party and other Dems might just be the ones out of step, and do some real soul-searching.

And yes, of course, I expect to move on from this in conversation and can we have lunch next week?

Except that you voted for a candidate who is still going around arguing the 2020 election was stolen. So I don’t really think that is moving on from the L.

Dems are mostly just commiserating online and wishing the republicans everything they voted for. I mean shouldn’t they want what they voted for? Congrats to them on mass deportations, union busting, supporting a rapist, and tax breaks for the elite. I mean it sincerely, when I say I love this for them.

Find me a single dem storming the Capitol building?

Sorry, but you don’t get to be all kumbaya and pretend you’re taking the high road when you are ok with Jan. 6th enough to vote for that man again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have written off the other side. Truly I want nothing to do with these morons who vote against their own interest and those of others

Yup.
It’s a question of morals, not political differences.

OK, so…then what? You want the majority of the country to be “immoral and unreachable,” and you want your party to keep losing again and again, because without any connection or healing of division or understanding, this is going to be it going forward? What do you want? Where do you want to go from here?

I’m tired of being in the only party that keeps looking for connection and healing. At least for now, I’m writing people off.

OP here. When I think about my family members who voted for Trump, I don’t think they want disconnect. They’ve never stopped talking to me or inviting me or wanting good things for me and my family. I think they are hurt that “people think I’m racist because I voted for Trump” but they can’t make the connection because, to them, racism means white hoods and burning crosses, and nothing else. Sexism means you, personally, wouldn’t hire a woman or have made a woman uncomfortable at work.

So I would say the Trump voters I know want more unity and for the tension to lessen, but they think that means liberals should “get over” Trump, and they genuinely don’t see why that is problematic. They think it’s “the same” as if Trump were John McCain or Mitt Romney or someone else who ran for president as Republican in recent memories. They truly don’t get why This is Different.

So given how everyone thinks and feels and views “the other side,” what is the actual best and most productive way forward? Do you honestly think “writing people off” is going to get Democrats power back in two or four years? How? How would that possibly work?

I'm a Trump voter in DC, OP, and I would say all of this is true. I get that my many Democratic friends are smarting a bit over this election; I've been around long enough to have been on the losing side of many campaigns. But I moved on and so should they.

The country has spoken. Loudly, in fact. If you don't like it, I would submit that you consider how you, your party and other Dems might just be the ones out of step, and do some real soul-searching.

And yes, of course, I expect to move on from this in conversation and can we have lunch next week?

I’m an Independent.

I will never consider myself “out of step” for refusing to vote for a convicted felon/lifelong crooked conman for President of the United States.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, start by having some common sense and ask this question much later. Perhaps in 6 months to a year.

People are mourning politics more than they mourn a death in the family. Ridiculous.

+1, some of these responses are just wild. I do not comprehend allowing yourself to be so completely taken in by our political environment that you are mourning and devastated. I know DCUM is a bit of a liberal echo chamber, but the hyperbolic responses are over the top.

+2

Some seem more like satire, hard to tell.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't want to talk politics with people. I didn't before the election either. I am lifelong democrat. I see why people voted for Kamala but think Trump is an abhorent rapist felon who is only out for himself and is a fascist.


I won't be friends with anyone who takes action to prevent the democratic process or is actively racist or fascist. If people undercut science and spread misinformation I will speak out.

But cutting off people about how they voted in this election seems short sighted. I have friends and colleagues with religions I think have terrible practices that they support, with jobs with cultures that make me uncomfortable and many other things. There are things I don't like about just about everyone, including myself. There are no absolutes.

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have written off the other side. Truly I want nothing to do with these morons who vote against their own interest and those of others

Yup.
It’s a question of morals, not political differences.

OK, so…then what? You want the majority of the country to be “immoral and unreachable,” and you want your party to keep losing again and again, because without any connection or healing of division or understanding, this is going to be it going forward? What do you want? Where do you want to go from here?

I’m tired of being in the only party that keeps looking for connection and healing. At least for now, I’m writing people off.

OP here. When I think about my family members who voted for Trump, I don’t think they want disconnect. They’ve never stopped talking to me or inviting me or wanting good things for me and my family. I think they are hurt that “people think I’m racist because I voted for Trump” but they can’t make the connection because, to them, racism means white hoods and burning crosses, and nothing else. Sexism means you, personally, wouldn’t hire a woman or have made a woman uncomfortable at work.

So I would say the Trump voters I know want more unity and for the tension to lessen, but they think that means liberals should “get over” Trump, and they genuinely don’t see why that is problematic. They think it’s “the same” as if Trump were John McCain or Mitt Romney or someone else who ran for president as Republican in recent memories. They truly don’t get why This is Different.

So given how everyone thinks and feels and views “the other side,” what is the actual best and most productive way forward? Do you honestly think “writing people off” is going to get Democrats power back in two or four years? How? How would that possibly work?

I'm a Trump voter in DC, OP, and I would say all of this is true. I get that my many Democratic friends are smarting a bit over this election; I've been around long enough to have been on the losing side of many campaigns. But I moved on and so should they.

The country has spoken. Loudly, in fact. If you don't like it, I would submit that you consider how you, your party and other Dems might just be the ones out of step, and do some real soul-searching.

And yes, of course, I expect to move on from this in conversation and can we have lunch next week?

My answer would be no, I will not have lunch with you.

PP here. Wow. And is there any question now as to which party is truly comprised of the mentally depressed and self-absorbed?

You are not the only friend I've lost. I'm hoping that with time, you will come to see the foolishness of throwing away a 15+ year friendship over politics. I will forgive you when you're ready, and hope we can move forward then, but please know that I've now seen an ugly side of you that I will never be able to forget is there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have written off the other side. Truly I want nothing to do with these morons who vote against their own interest and those of others

Yup.
It’s a question of morals, not political differences.

OK, so…then what? You want the majority of the country to be “immoral and unreachable,” and you want your party to keep losing again and again, because without any connection or healing of division or understanding, this is going to be it going forward? What do you want? Where do you want to go from here?

I’m tired of being in the only party that keeps looking for connection and healing. At least for now, I’m writing people off.

OP here. When I think about my family members who voted for Trump, I don’t think they want disconnect. They’ve never stopped talking to me or inviting me or wanting good things for me and my family. I think they are hurt that “people think I’m racist because I voted for Trump” but they can’t make the connection because, to them, racism means white hoods and burning crosses, and nothing else. Sexism means you, personally, wouldn’t hire a woman or have made a woman uncomfortable at work.

So I would say the Trump voters I know want more unity and for the tension to lessen, but they think that means liberals should “get over” Trump, and they genuinely don’t see why that is problematic. They think it’s “the same” as if Trump were John McCain or Mitt Romney or someone else who ran for president as Republican in recent memories. They truly don’t get why This is Different.

So given how everyone thinks and feels and views “the other side,” what is the actual best and most productive way forward? Do you honestly think “writing people off” is going to get Democrats power back in two or four years? How? How would that possibly work?

I'm a Trump voter in DC, OP, and I would say all of this is true. I get that my many Democratic friends are smarting a bit over this election; I've been around long enough to have been on the losing side of many campaigns. But I moved on and so should they.

The country has spoken. Loudly, in fact. If you don't like it, I would submit that you consider how you, your party and other Dems might just be the ones out of step, and do some real soul-searching.

And yes, of course, I expect to move on from this in conversation and can we have lunch next week?

OP here, I would love to! Thank you so much for responding.

My soul-searching has already begun. I used to be a Republican (as in when I was 18 and voted in my first election), I’m from a “red state,” and most of my family are working-class Republicans, some are middle class Republicans. I’m grateful for the conversations and connections I have with my family. We don’t talk about politics a ton, but we do sometimes. It helps to hear their perspective. And I’m sure it would be interesting to hear yours!

PP again. When you say you used to be a Republican, from a red state, what does that mean? How and why did you come to change your views? Are you really sure that is a good thing?

As my mother said when I moved here, "don't let DC ruin you!" Always remember who you are and where you came from.