My husband just made a snide Peloton comment

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find it hard to work out. I have to gear up to do it, I hate it, but we just bought this costly Peloton and I'm trying to stay committed. But I don't like the instructor rides; I prefer scenic rides that I can do at my own pace and speed, while just zoning out.

I had a rough day and dragged myself to the bike. Cued up my scenic, easy ride. Began pedaling. Husband appears over my shoulder and asks why I'm not doing a "real" ride to get better.

WTF! I am doing a real ride, just not the kind he prefers.

He does this in the kitchen too. Why are you making brownies with two eggs? Why are you heating the pan so hot? Why why WHY

I AM ANNOYED

Your post is eye opening. I do this to my husband and I need to stop.

[Anonymous]

“This is the way I prefer to do it”. Repeat.

Btw OP, even when I was 100 percent motivated to work out, I hated classes. I have enough stress in my life, I do not need some random person yelling at me. I know some people find it motivating, but I do not.

[Anonymous]

Jesus Christ! He sounds like an ass.

[Anonymous]

The correct response is, "F%$k off."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mine does this, too, and it drives me bonkers. It's this veiled way of criticizing. I just say, "Why do you ask?" to all of them. Then he either has to back off, or he has to make the criticism overtly.

How is that veiled? How the eff do you guys live with partners who are trying to make you feel like shit, fully intentionally?

Because, honestly, that's not his conscious intention. If you asked him, he'd say he was trying to be helpful, and that's what he genuinely thinks. He's condescending, not negging. He's "just asking a question," so if I bring it out in the open directly, I turn into the one picking the fight, and I just can't deal with that all the time. It's just easier to deflect it this way, because I don't have the energy for arguments.

I would say something along the lines of, I really think you are trying to be helpful but what I hear in your questions is criticism and that is upsetting to me, am I right that is not what you intended? Try to speak honestly without accusing.

I seriously had no idea that I had a habit of responding in a very condescending manner when I was surprised that someone did not know something I thought was common knowledge until DH pointed it out to me. Literally a 40 plus year manner of speaking to people I care about and nothing could be further from my intent.

[Anonymous]

Best line I heard from a neighbor who was weeding when her husband came up and told her she had missed a few:

“I don’t need a supervisor “

Rinse and repeat

[Anonymous]

My husband does this, but honestly, I don’t mind. He’s right. If I’m just sitting there spinning my legs, not getting an actual workout, I’m just wasting time. I find it motivating, maybe try to look at it that way?

[Anonymous]

Stupid man thinking his experience on a high school basketball team has made him an expert. Tell him to move on and work on his own body.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband does this, but honestly, I don’t mind. He’s right. If I’m just sitting there spinning my legs, not getting an actual workout, I’m just wasting time. I find it motivating, maybe try to look at it that way?

+1

[Anonymous]

If you spent the money on the peloton you should do the real exercises. Have you been to SoulCycle? The 45 minutes on the bike is supposed to be intense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find it hard to work out. I have to gear up to do it, I hate it, but we just bought this costly Peloton and I'm trying to stay committed. But I don't like the instructor rides; I prefer scenic rides that I can do at my own pace and speed, while just zoning out.

I had a rough day and dragged myself to the bike. Cued up my scenic, easy ride. Began pedaling. Husband appears over my shoulder and asks why I'm not doing a "real" ride to get better.

WTF! I am doing a real ride, just not the kind he prefers.

He does this in the kitchen too. Why are you making brownies with two eggs? Why are you heating the pan so hot? Why why WHY

I AM ANNOYED

This is why one should never criticize someone else until you have walked (or biked?) a mile in their shoes. That way, when you make the criticism, you are a mile away. And you have their shoes.

[Anonymous]

Because you could have bought a stationary bike for 1/10 the price and watched something scenic on your TV.

[Anonymous]

“You do your things your way and I don’t interfere. Let me do my things my way without comments”

My husband will ask a question sometimes that he totally thinks is legit but I just take the tone and the timing as criticism. You just both need to be aware of it and speak up (kindly) when it happens.

[Anonymous]

Maybe explain to him you’re doing this to relax, not exercise?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because you could have bought a stationary bike for 1/10 the price and watched something scenic on your TV.

+1