My husband just made a snide Peloton comment

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He sounds awful. I could never be married to a person like that

Seems like a bit of an overreaction. Annoying but frankly maybe OP is being a bit defensive about all of this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mine does this, too, and it drives me bonkers. It's this veiled way of criticizing. I just say, "Why do you ask?" to all of them. Then he either has to back off, or he has to make the criticism overtly.

How is that veiled? How the eff do you guys live with partners who are trying to make you feel like shit, fully intentionally?

agree. We're they always like this?

No, or I wouldn't have married him. We've hashed this out many times, and it's moderately better, but he just thinks he knows every damn thing. The irony is that he's super sensitive to criticism himself.

So you say exactly that. Say, "why do you think you know every damn thing, and yet are super sensitive to criticism yourself?"

Some men need it brought right in front of their face like this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have been an athlete my entire life. I played on a very competitive team for most of my childhood through HS..and ran indoor track. I am a woman.

I have met so many women throughout my life that say they want to be fit like me. Can I help them? When I was in my 20s/early 30s, random women at my gym would pare up with me. I'd show them weights, they wanted to run on treadmill next to me, etc. Out of more than 10 women only 1 stuck with any of it...even more than a few weeks.

I came to realize that a vast majority of Americans don't know what is truly needed for fitness. This BS about a 10 min walk a day and low intensity is crap. You need variety: weights, some type of core training and some type of cardio. If you trot along at a slow pace on a walk, very little is being done in terms of fitness and even less (nothing) at weight loss.

I see your husband's frustration. Your slow peddling and mind wandering on Peloton might be good for your mental health, but in terms of fitness you are not getting much benefit at all and most likely upping your calorie intake because you think you got 'exercise'.

It's tough love. I have a neighbor that is similar and asked what she should do..but then had a litany of reasons why she couldn't do X, Y or Z. Ok.

It's hard work to go from zero to being an 'athlete', but people that stick with it generally reap the rewards and then catch 'the bug'.

+1000

I am not an athlete but I am in decent shape and when I have put effort into trying to get into shape I have worked very very hard. I have a peloton, have had it for three weeks and had a baby last year and I've been beating my PRs every day. I know what you speak of is what I'm saying.

That said this message is super super damaging. Going from couch to walking can dramatically improve the health of someone who is inactive. Riding that peloton on a scenic ride everyday is better than instead watching bravo for that hour.

This like, demands of perfection in fitness or else 'you're not doing anything its pointless' is a good way to keep people on the couch.

People make excuses for fitness but OP doesn't sound like she's looking to be a triathlete, sounds like she just wants to move a little every day. And if her husband turns her movement into an opportunity to criticize, she'll stop doing it entirely, and that will actually be bad.

So get off your high horse athlete and exercise some empathy muscles instead of your lats.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have been an athlete my entire life. I played on a very competitive team for most of my childhood through HS..and ran indoor track. I am a woman.

I have met so many women throughout my life that say they want to be fit like me. Can I help them? When I was in my 20s/early 30s, random women at my gym would pare up with me. I'd show them weights, they wanted to run on treadmill next to me, etc. Out of more than 10 women only 1 stuck with any of it...even more than a few weeks.

I came to realize that a vast majority of Americans don't know what is truly needed for fitness. This BS about a 10 min walk a day and low intensity is crap. You need variety: weights, some type of core training and some type of cardio. If you trot along at a slow pace on a walk, very little is being done in terms of fitness and even less (nothing) at weight loss.

I see your husband's frustration. Your slow peddling and mind wandering on Peloton might be good for your mental health, but in terms of fitness you are not getting much benefit at all and most likely upping your calorie intake because you think you got 'exercise'.

It's tough love. I have a neighbor that is similar and asked what she should do..but then had a litany of reasons why she couldn't do X, Y or Z. Ok.

It's hard work to go from zero to being an 'athlete', but people that stick with it generally reap the rewards and then catch 'the bug'.

And?

Your response does not address OP's question. You made it an excuse to congratulate yourself on how much fitter you are than anyone else. Too bad you were unable to include a photo of your abs for people to admire.

In the history of the world has anyone's spouse or parent telling them they are fat ever resulted in sustained weight loss? I would venture a guess the answer is no.

This problem is about communication, not the actual peloton.

+1. The husband is being a jerk and well as this poster bragging about themselves. Holy projection. Geez.

Some people, especially if they grew up with a parent who was constantly critiquing everyone and announcing their totally irrelevant and unasked for opinions also behave like this husband.

ex: My husband and MIL. I was a competitive athlete and seriously injured my head and spine. SO did not become athletic until after we got together. He sometimes made those jabs when I was working out (aka: PT exercises, rowing, etc) because his ego is inflated from all of his times and awards and people kissing his feet.

Only people who are jerks demonstrate this excessive nit-picking critique behavior. Nothing is more discouraging or rage-inducing and demonstrates a lack of support or natural leadership ability. I have limitations set by my specialists otherwise I get injured. Idc for feedback on my marriage, btw, so don't bother because I won't bother to read it.

I'd really snap at him over these things since it seems frequent and consistent passive-aggressive critiquing of OP. It isn't coming off as encouraging or curious, which would change my reaction. Boundaries and expectations of what is considered acceptable behavior need to be maintained in couples. This is definitely not something to let slide.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like people don't realize how much a Peloton costs and how that compares to a bike that just gives you scenic rides. A Peloton costs about $2K, whereas a nice quality normal exercise bike costs about $350. Not sure if that $2K includes shipping costs. https://www.onepeloton.com/shop/bike There is also a charge for the subscription for the classes.

The classes are what distinguishes the Peloton from the other bikes out there, and increases the price. But it is a better quality piece of equipment than the average exercise bike.

The reason people are saying she's being wasteful is that she's seriously underutilizing the equipment. They've made the investment in this very expensive exercise bike yet she refuses to use the features that made it so expensive. She should have told him before they spent their money that she wasn't planning to use it to do what it was designed for. It's possible he would have chosen a less expensive option if he'd known that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like people don't realize how much a Peloton costs and how that compares to a bike that just gives you scenic rides. A Peloton costs about $2K, whereas a nice quality normal exercise bike costs about $350. Not sure if that $2K includes shipping costs. https://www.onepeloton.com/shop/bike There is also a charge for the subscription for the classes.

The classes are what distinguishes the Peloton from the other bikes out there, and increases the price. But it is a better quality piece of equipment than the average exercise bike.

The reason people are saying she's being wasteful is that she's seriously underutilizing the equipment. They've made the investment in this very expensive exercise bike yet she refuses to use the features that made it so expensive. She should have told him before they spent their money that she wasn't planning to use it to do what it was designed for. It's possible he would have chosen a less expensive option if he'd known that.

It sounds like you don't know how to MYOB.

Per the OP

"I'm the OP. We bought it as a joint purchase to use to exercise during the winter especially when we'd be cooped up and quarantined.
I use it in my own way. I had been happy with my progress."

I wonder how many of the people sure that OP & OP's spouse should have bought a less-expensive bike own something (a house, a car, a computer, clothes) that does more and costs more than they actually need but are happy with the purchase nonetheless?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He sounds awful. I could never be married to a person like that

Seems like a bit of an overreaction. Annoying but frankly maybe OP is being a bit defensive about all of this.

It sounds like he does this a lot, though. Once, maybe she’s overreacting. Regularly - DH is supremely annoying.