My husband just made a snide Peloton comment

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have been an athlete my entire life. I played on a very competitive team for most of my childhood through HS..and ran indoor track. I am a woman.

I have met so many women throughout my life that say they want to be fit like me. Can I help them? When I was in my 20s/early 30s, random women at my gym would pare up with me. I'd show them weights, they wanted to run on treadmill next to me, etc. Out of more than 10 women only 1 stuck with any of it...even more than a few weeks.

I came to realize that a vast majority of Americans don't know what is truly needed for fitness. This BS about a 10 min walk a day and low intensity is crap. You need variety: weights, some type of core training and some type of cardio. If you trot along at a slow pace on a walk, very little is being done in terms of fitness and even less (nothing) at weight loss.

I see your husband's frustration. Your slow peddling and mind wandering on Peloton might be good for your mental health, but in terms of fitness you are not getting much benefit at all and most likely upping your calorie intake because you think you got 'exercise'.

It's tough love. I have a neighbor that is similar and asked what she should do..but then had a litany of reasons why she couldn't do X, Y or Z. Ok.

It's hard work to go from zero to being an 'athlete', but people that stick with it generally reap the rewards and then catch 'the bug'.

I am not an athlete but I am in decent shape and when I have put effort into trying to get into shape I have worked very very hard. I have a peloton, have had it for three weeks and had a baby last year and I've been beating my PRs every day. I know what you speak of is what I'm saying.

That said this message is super super damaging. Going from couch to walking can dramatically improve the health of someone who is inactive. Riding that peloton on a scenic ride everyday is better than instead watching bravo for that hour.

This like, demands of perfection in fitness or else 'you're not doing anything its pointless' is a good way to keep people on the couch.

People make excuses for fitness but OP doesn't sound like she's looking to be a triathlete, sounds like she just wants to move a little every day. And if her husband turns her movement into an opportunity to criticize, she'll stop doing it entirely, and that will actually be bad.

So get off your high horse athlete and exercise some empathy muscles instead of your lats.

100 percent this! Any movement is good movement. A scenic ride is better than sitting on the sofa. This kind of all-or-nothing attitude is what keeps people glued to the couch -- they feel judged. Unless OP is using her Peloton as a clothes hanger. it's not a waste of money -- let and let live.

[Anonymous]

Yet more evidence that advice to husbands to "encourage your wife to walk after dinner!" is not going to change her body.

[Anonymous]

I read through this entire thread and OP never came back to say whether her DH wanted the bike and uses it (for the instructor rides), or did she want the bike. If he wanted it and uses it then he has no right to judge how she chooses to use it. If she wanted it and he agreed because he thought it would get her to exercise, but she doesn’t get the full experience, he has a right to be annoyed that they spent so much money on the actual Peleton, instead of some $300 spin bike off Amazon. I get annoyed when my spouse buys all the gear for their hobby du jour and then loses interest. Even if it has nothing to do with fitness or weight or touchy subjects like that. OP may have thought this new shiny thing would magically help her to get fit, but then lost interest when she realized it is really hard and maybe even uncomfortable. OP may be the type to constantly try the next new diet, but never sticks to it. But who knows? OP never clarified.

[Anonymous]

I'm the OP. We bought it as a joint purchase to use to exercise during the winter especially when we'd be cooped up and quarantined.
I use it in my own way. I had been happy with my progress.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm the OP. We bought it as a joint purchase to use to exercise during the winter especially when we'd be cooped up and quarantined.
I use it in my own way. I had been happy with my progress.

Was his comment a one-off remark or is he still criticizing you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find it hard to work out. I have to gear up to do it, I hate it, but we just bought this costly Peloton and I'm trying to stay committed. But I don't like the instructor rides; I prefer scenic rides that I can do at my own pace and speed, while just zoning out.

I had a rough day and dragged myself to the bike. Cued up my scenic, easy ride. Began pedaling. Husband appears over my shoulder and asks why I'm not doing a "real" ride to get better.

WTF! I am doing a real ride, just not the kind he prefers.

He does this in the kitchen too. Why are you making brownies with two eggs? Why are you heating the pan so hot? Why why WHY

I AM ANNOYED

"I'm practicing so I can be a better cook for my next husband."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm the OP. We bought it as a joint purchase to use to exercise during the winter especially when we'd be cooped up and quarantined.
I use it in my own way. I had been happy with my progress.

Was his comment a one-off remark or is he still criticizing you?

I bit his head off, so he has slunk away...

[Anonymous]

Reading through the responses... my god some of your marriages sound so stressful

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm the OP. We bought it as a joint purchase to use to exercise during the winter especially when we'd be cooped up and quarantined.
I use it in my own way. I had been happy with my progress.

Was his comment a one-off remark or is he still criticizing you?

I bit his head off, so he has slunk away...

Good for you!

[Anonymous]

I’m so confused about why people think the scenic rides are automatically wussy. You can adjust the resistance and cadence on those the exact same way you would in an instructor-led class. Even if OP used it is a recovery or meditation ride, it’s awesome that she clipped in and chose to move. I am positive that she felt better afterward. What kind of person would criticize that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m so confused about why people think the scenic rides are automatically wussy. You can adjust the resistance and cadence on those the exact same way you would in an instructor-led class. Even if OP used it is a recovery or meditation ride, it’s awesome that she clipped in and chose to move. I am positive that she felt better afterward. What kind of person would criticize that?

He probably wants her to lose weight. Seems obvious to me.

[Anonymous]

He sounds awful. I could never be married to a person like that

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm the OP. We bought it as a joint purchase to use to exercise during the winter especially when we'd be cooped up and quarantined.
I use it in my own way. I had been happy with my progress.

Was his comment a one-off remark or is he still criticizing you?

I bit his head off, so he has slunk away...

Good for you!

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have been an athlete my entire life. I played on a very competitive team for most of my childhood through HS..and ran indoor track. I am a woman.

I have met so many women throughout my life that say they want to be fit like me. Can I help them? When I was in my 20s/early 30s, random women at my gym would pare up with me. I'd show them weights, they wanted to run on treadmill next to me, etc. Out of more than 10 women only 1 stuck with any of it...even more than a few weeks.

I came to realize that a vast majority of Americans don't know what is truly needed for fitness. This BS about a 10 min walk a day and low intensity is crap. You need variety: weights, some type of core training and some type of cardio. If you trot along at a slow pace on a walk, very little is being done in terms of fitness and even less (nothing) at weight loss.

I see your husband's frustration. Your slow peddling and mind wandering on Peloton might be good for your mental health, but in terms of fitness you are not getting much benefit at all and most likely upping your calorie intake because you think you got 'exercise'.

It's tough love. I have a neighbor that is similar and asked what she should do..but then had a litany of reasons why she couldn't do X, Y or Z. Ok.

It's hard work to go from zero to being an 'athlete', but people that stick with it generally reap the rewards and then catch 'the bug'.

Maybe they don’t stick with you because you’re insufferable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m so confused about why people think the scenic rides are automatically wussy. You can adjust the resistance and cadence on those the exact same way you would in an instructor-led class. Even if OP used it is a recovery or meditation ride, it’s awesome that she clipped in and chose to move. I am positive that she felt better afterward. What kind of person would criticize that?

He probably wants her to lose weight. Seems obvious to me.

Yup. He's trying all the classic recommendations to "gently" help your wife lose weight. But of course women see through them.