Marriage without sex

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly don't think she's cheating. I think she just doesn't want to have sex with me. And we're still both reasonably attractive. We're not movie stars but nobody's gained a ton of weight or suddenly become ugly.

I don't think she's cheating either but go to therapy. She should also see her doctor and check her hormones. Life is too long to live it sexless for no good reason. If she balks at therapy you need to impress upon her that it's important to you and the issue isn't just going to go away, and just cause you don't nag her about it doesn't mean you are alright with the status quo.

+1. Try a sex therapist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think she's cheating. I haven't had sex in over a year, neither of us are interested. Still enjoy life together though, and neither one of us is looking to destroy our marriage by cheating.

Your marriage is destroyed. You are roommates.

Why is everyone so melodramatic? OP, do some fun, new things with your wife. Sometimes people just get bored.

no it does not matter if you do the laundry, or take care of the kids, or take her out to dinner, or do something different. she doesnt care about the marriage. You are not that important to her. been there, get out now. there are other women that will actively take part in a marriage.

[Anonymous]

Ha, marriage without sex. That’s my marriage. Had a kid four years ago. Haven’t had sex in five year. Yes, that’s five years.

Wife went from 120lb to 190lb during pregnancy. Doc told her to watch her weight. She didn’t. Three years later she’s 155lb. Today she’s 145lb. Won’t go to gym or eat healthy. We joined a gym with a day care. Paid $5000 over two years. She went maybe 15 times. Waste of money. I stopped paying and cancelled.

Yeah, no sex. A good amount of arguing talking about how different we are. I bike 50-60 miles a week. Watch what I eat. We’re so different with nothing in common anymore. When we became parents I changed. Became more mature, responsible, focused on future financials, etc. She stayed the same.

If I was a betting man we’ll be separated within two years from now. I’m halfway through my life, I want to be in a loving relationship. This isn’t one.

I tell her all the time we are roommates raising a kid together. And we argue about how to raise our kid. Life...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ha, marriage without sex. That’s my marriage. Had a kid four years ago. Haven’t had sex in five year. Yes, that’s five years.

Wife went from 120lb to 190lb during pregnancy. Doc told her to watch her weight. She didn’t. Three years later she’s 155lb. Today she’s 145lb. Won’t go to gym or eat healthy. We joined a gym with a day care. Paid $5000 over two years. She went maybe 15 times. Waste of money. I stopped paying and cancelled.

Yeah, no sex. A good amount of arguing talking about how different we are. I bike 50-60 miles a week. Watch what I eat. We’re so different with nothing in common anymore. When we became parents I changed. Became more mature, responsible, focused on future financials, etc. She stayed the same.

If I was a betting man we’ll be separated within two years from now. I’m halfway through my life, I want to be in a loving relationship. This isn’t one.

I tell her all the time we are roommates raising a kid together. And we argue about how to raise our kid. Life...

There’s a lot of stuff going on there. It’s probably not as simple as you think. Your wife may have deep issues with you. The weight could even be a security blanket. Maybe she’s very unhappy. Who knows. But it’s most likely not what you think and what you’ve been doing isn’t working

[Anonymous]

I think OP wants suggestions not judgments, people. Here’s mine: get some high quality porn videos. There’s one I used to have that was a loving couple, not gross. Since she doesn’t want sex, the least she could do is watch with you. Guarantee she will get at least a bit interested. Works for me!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think OP wants suggestions not judgments, people. Here’s mine: get some high quality porn videos. There’s one I used to have that was a loving couple, not gross. Since she doesn’t want sex, the least she could do is watch with you. Guarantee she will get at least a bit interested. Works for me!

Not a bad idea.

[Anonymous]

The nice guy routine won’t work. Be direct. If she won’t meet you half way you have a game changing problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't think she's cheating. I haven't had sex in over a year, neither of us are interested. Still enjoy life together though, and neither one of us is looking to destroy our marriage by cheating.

Dude. She's not interested in sex with you. That doesn't mean she's not interested in sex with other men.

If you are "enjoying your life together" what's the problem? Will it destroy your life together if she never has sex with you again?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think she's cheating. I haven't had sex in over a year, neither of us are interested. Still enjoy life together though, and neither one of us is looking to destroy our marriage by cheating.

Your marriage is destroyed. You are roommates.

Why is everyone so melodramatic? OP, do some fun, new things with your wife. Sometimes people just get bored.

no it does not matter if you do the laundry, or take care of the kids, or take her out to dinner, or do something different. she doesnt care about the marriage. You are not that important to her. been there, get out now. there are other women that will actively take part in a marriage.

It really is that simple, she doesn't care about the marriage OR has zero respect for you. Therapy wont work, you cant "therapy" someone into respect or caring. The only thing that may is if it becomes apparent to her that he is willing to leave or if she sense another woman is a threat because she may be interested in him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ha, marriage without sex. That’s my marriage. Had a kid four years ago. Haven’t had sex in five year. Yes, that’s five years.

Wife went from 120lb to 190lb during pregnancy. Doc told her to watch her weight. She didn’t. Three years later she’s 155lb. Today she’s 145lb. Won’t go to gym or eat healthy. We joined a gym with a day care. Paid $5000 over two years. She went maybe 15 times. Waste of money. I stopped paying and cancelled.

Yeah, no sex. A good amount of arguing talking about how different we are. I bike 50-60 miles a week. Watch what I eat. We’re so different with nothing in common anymore. When we became parents I changed. Became more mature, responsible, focused on future financials, etc. She stayed the same.

If I was a betting man we’ll be separated within two years from now. I’m halfway through my life, I want to be in a loving relationship. This isn’t one.

I tell her all the time we are roommates raising a kid together. And we argue about how to raise our kid. Life...

Not sure I understand. Looks like she lost a lot of the weight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ha, marriage without sex. That’s my marriage. Had a kid four years ago. Haven’t had sex in five year. Yes, that’s five years.

Wife went from 120lb to 190lb during pregnancy. Doc told her to watch her weight. She didn’t. Three years later she’s 155lb. Today she’s 145lb. Won’t go to gym or eat healthy. We joined a gym with a day care. Paid $5000 over two years. She went maybe 15 times. Waste of money. I stopped paying and cancelled.

Yeah, no sex. A good amount of arguing talking about how different we are. I bike 50-60 miles a week. Watch what I eat. We’re so different with nothing in common anymore. When we became parents I changed. Became more mature, responsible, focused on future financials, etc. She stayed the same.

If I was a betting man we’ll be separated within two years from now. I’m halfway through my life, I want to be in a loving relationship. This isn’t one.

I tell her all the time we are roommates raising a kid together. And we argue about how to raise our kid. Life...

There’s a lot of stuff going on there. It’s probably not as simple as you think. Your wife may have deep issues with you. The weight could even be a security blanket. Maybe she’s very unhappy. Who knows. But it’s most likely not what you think and what you’ve been doing isn’t working

That is typical woman nonsense. "Deep issues", equals "I want to blame you for my issues" and do nothing about it myself. Funny how women claim to be such great communicator yet commonly have problems speaking up on important issues.

[Anonymous]

How often do you do things together, like go on date nights? What do you do for birthdays, anniversaries, etc?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think OP wants suggestions not judgments, people. Here’s mine: get some high quality porn videos. There’s one I used to have that was a loving couple, not gross. Since she doesn’t want sex, the least she could do is watch with you. Guarantee she will get at least a bit interested. Works for me!

If she is actively avoidingsex she isn't going to watch it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think she's cheating. I haven't had sex in over a year, neither of us are interested. Still enjoy life together though, and neither one of us is looking to destroy our marriage by cheating.

Dude. She's not interested in sex with you. That doesn't mean she's not interested in sex with other men.

If you are "enjoying your life together" what's the problem? Will it destroy your life together if she never has sex with you again?

If a man is such a p*ssy they would stay under that circumstance, its no wonder she would not what to have sex with him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think OP wants suggestions not judgments, people. Here’s mine: get some high quality porn videos. There’s one I used to have that was a loving couple, not gross. Since she doesn’t want sex, the least she could do is watch with you. Guarantee she will get at least a bit interested. Works for me!

If she is actively avoidingsex she isn't going to watch it.

+1

Why people use words like 'guarantee' is beyond me.