What happens to the "dud" husbands after divorce?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She only _thought_ I was a dud. I was a winner all along, and she was and continues to be a loser.

My income is up 40 percent, and I've slept with a couple of dozen women who are 10-30 years younger than me since the divorce.

I've made two major mistakes in life: getting married, and having children.

She was right and you just admitted it. Anyone who regrets their children IS a dud as a father and parenting partner. I doubt your ex is impressed by your sex life now, but I hope she’s keeping an eye on your bank account and taking what her kids are owed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, ladies but men have a lot easier of a time rebounding after divorce than you do.

This is just not true. It is not 1965. It is far easier for women

Look, not every thing said on DCUM when it comes to men versus women is sexist. Some of it is actually true. Men remarry more quickly and more often than women in this country after divorce. FACT. That to me is pretty good evidence that they “rebound” more quickly.

[Anonymous]

It seems they keep being duds. They trick another woman with their "charm" but they're still the same immature, cheating, alcoholic and that side eventually slips out.

[Anonymous]

My ex wife made me a better husband for my current DW.

[Anonymous]

They remarry a woman about 10 years younger, in my experience.

[Anonymous]

They usually remarry someone who really needs money or has been lonely for a while. Not all these guys are "duds" but many are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, ladies but men have a lot easier of a time rebounding after divorce than you do.

This is just not true. It is not 1965. It is far easier for women

As a divorced man I have to admit this is true. Dating is mostly online these days. And for every 10 likes I get, women will get like 200. And there are a lot of good single men out there for decent divorced women. But once a guy is 50 or so, it’s really tough to find women, exception is only with very rare rich and fit guys. It’s so much easier for women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She only _thought_ I was a dud. I was a winner all along, and she was and continues to be a loser.

My income is up 40 percent, and I've slept with a couple of dozen women who are 10-30 years younger than me since the divorce.

I've made two major mistakes in life: getting married, and having children.

She was right and you just admitted it. Anyone who regrets their children IS a dud as a father and parenting partner. I doubt your ex is impressed by your sex life now, but I hope she’s keeping an eye on your bank account and taking what her kids are owed.

I am a woman and I agree with the previous poster… The biggest mistakes in my life were getting married and having children. I love my kids and I’m a great mom but these were still two of the biggest mistakes of my life. It’s simply not worth it and has derailed to the things that I really wanted to do. I am so sick of this society glorifying motherhood and parenthood. A lot of it sucks and it’s not worth the “reward” everyone espouses.

[Anonymous]

Judging from the neighborhood, they become hermits, their yards get overgrown and weedy, no house maintenance happens, once a year a female relative shows up to clean up enough to prevent neighbors from calling authorities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, ladies but men have a lot easier of a time rebounding after divorce than you do.

This is just not true. It is not 1965. It is far easier for women

Look, not every thing said on DCUM when it comes to men versus women is sexist. Some of it is actually true. Men remarry more quickly and more often than women in this country after divorce. FACT. That to me is pretty good evidence that they “rebound” more quickly.

Then you’re clearly not divorced because it’s much easier for women to get attention divorced than men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They remarry a woman about 10 years younger, in my experience.

I’m divorced and haven’t seen that yet. You must be over 55 to say that because that’s not currently happening with people in their 40s.

[Anonymous]

They find another sucker and the two of them talk about how horrible his ex is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, ladies but men have a lot easier of a time rebounding after divorce than you do.

This is just not true. It is not 1965. It is far easier for women

As a divorced man I have to admit this is true. Dating is mostly online these days. And for every 10 likes I get, women will get like 200. And there are a lot of good single men out there for decent divorced women. But once a guy is 50 or so, it’s really tough to find women, exception is only with very rare rich and fit guys. It’s so much easier for women.

I am the PP. 100%. Much to migrate shock when I thought nobody would be interested when I was divorced in my 40s I have more male attention than I ever had in my 20s and more than I know what to do with. My ex-husband even admitted before we were divorced that it would be 100 times easier for me post divorce than him and this has proven to be the case. It’s not 20 or 30 years ago when men have all the cards. A lot of it’s because women make their own money and they don’t need to just go and marry somebody else like they used to—and that’s why it was easier for men to marry women 10 years younger than them but now women 10 years younger than him make their own money so they don’t need to settle for some old guy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She only _thought_ I was a dud. I was a winner all along, and she was and continues to be a loser.

My income is up 40 percent, and I've slept with a couple of dozen women who are 10-30 years younger than me since the divorce.

I've made two major mistakes in life: getting married, and having children.

She was right and you just admitted it. Anyone who regrets their children IS a dud as a father and parenting partner. I doubt your ex is impressed by your sex life now, but I hope she’s keeping an eye on your bank account and taking what her kids are owed.

Agreed. If you regret your kids please have that flashing in neon lights on your dating profile so we can all avoid you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, ladies but men have a lot easier of a time rebounding after divorce than you do.

This is just not true. It is not 1965. It is far easier for women

As a divorced man I have to admit this is true. Dating is mostly online these days. And for every 10 likes I get, women will get like 200. And there are a lot of good single men out there for decent divorced women. But once a guy is 50 or so, it’s really tough to find women, exception is only with very rare rich and fit guys. It’s so much easier for women.

I am the PP. 100%. Much to migrate shock when I thought nobody would be interested when I was divorced in my 40s I have more male attention than I ever had in my 20s and more than I know what to do with. My ex-husband even admitted before we were divorced that it would be 100 times easier for me post divorce than him and this has proven to be the case. It’s not 20 or 30 years ago when men have all the cards. A lot of it’s because women make their own money and they don’t need to just go and marry somebody else like they used to—and that’s why it was easier for men to marry women 10 years younger than them but now women 10 years younger than him make their own money so they don’t need to settle for some old guy.

+1

I also think that back when less was expected of men as fathers, it was possible for men with kids to divorce and find younger wives eager to start new families. But because these guys are now expected to actually be involved in the lives of the kids from their first marriage, and the law does a better job of ensuring they are also paying child support, that becomes WAY less attractive to a woman in her 20s or 30s who hopes to have her own family. Back in the 60s, that guy could effectively abandon his first family and start over and face pretty limited reprobation for it. It doesn't work that way anymore.

I will say that women with young kids still face systemic challenges as divorced women. Even with joint custody, they are often perceived as less available and more focused on their kids (even if they are not) and thus less desirable. But once kids are old this is less of an issue.

Though here I will also note that among the women I know who have divorced "duds", the majority were not super interested in dating until a few years after the divorce. Mostly they are just excited to no longer be picking up the slack for their dud husbands and get to focus on themselves for the first time in a long time. Eventually they use some of dad's custody time for dating, but my observation is that this is rarely the focus for these women. They've pretty much had it with men, at least for a while, and I don't blame them. It sucks dragging around all that dead weight while also working and raising kids.