Reply to What happens to the "dud" husbands after divorce?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Sorry, ladies but men have a lot easier of a time rebounding after divorce than you do. [/quote]

This is just not true. It is not 1965. It is far easier for women [/quote]

As a divorced man I have to admit this is true. Dating is mostly online these days. And for every 10 likes I get, women will get like 200. And there are a lot of good single men out there for decent divorced women. But once a guy is 50 or so, it’s really tough to find women, exception is only with very rare rich and fit guys.  It’s so much easier for women. [/quote]

I am the PP. 100%. Much to migrate shock when I thought nobody would be interested when I was divorced in my 40s I have more male attention than I ever had in my 20s and more than I know what to do with. My ex-husband even admitted before we were divorced that it would be 100 times easier for me post divorce than him and this has proven to be the case. It’s not 20 or 30 years ago when men have all the cards. A lot of it’s because women make their own money and they don’t need to just go and marry somebody else like they used to—and that’s why it was easier for men to marry women 10 years younger than them but now women 10 years younger than him make their own money so they don’t need to settle for some old guy. [/quote]

I also think that back when less was expected of men as fathers, it was possible for men with kids to divorce and find younger wives eager to start new families. But because these guys are now expected to actually be involved in the lives of the kids from their first marriage, and the law does a better job of ensuring they are also paying child support, that becomes WAY less attractive to a woman in her 20s or 30s who hopes to have her own family. Back in the 60s, that guy could effectively abandon his first family and start over and face pretty limited reprobation for it. It doesn't work that way anymore.

I will say that women with young kids still face systemic challenges as divorced women. Even with joint custody, they are often perceived as less available and more focused on their kids (even if they are not) and thus less desirable. But once kids are old this is less of an issue.

Though here I will also note that among the women I know who have divorced "duds", the majority were not super interested in dating until a few years after the divorce. Mostly they are just excited to no longer be picking up the slack for their dud husbands and get to focus on themselves for the first time in a long time. Eventually they use some of dad's custody time for dating, but my observation is that this is rarely the focus for these women. They've pretty much had it with men, at least for a while, and I don't blame them. It sucks dragging around all that dead weight while also working and raising kids.[/quote]

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