SAHM-friend has NEVER once asked about my job

[Anonymous]

Why on EARTH would I want to hear about your job?

Jobs are jobs because they have to pay you to get you to show up. It is not remotely interesting for the other person in 98% of cases, and I’ll bet that’s low for DC. (Maybe if you’re the chief gorilla person at the zoo or something.)

I would be relieved to have a friend who isn’t the typical DMV drone who can barely string a story together if it isn’t about their TPS reports.

[Anonymous]

This has absolutely nothing to do with your friend being a SAHM.

[Anonymous]

I hate talking about work and this would not bother me at all.

Does she ask you about other stuff? Your family, interests, what you do with your time, how you are feeling lately? If not, the issue is not that she doesn't ask about work, it's that she's not interested in you at all. But if she asks about the other stuff and not work, that's normal to me. Work is usually pretty boring, and can be a source of stress, and unless someone expresses an interest in talking about it, I leave it alone.

The exception is when someone has a really interesting job, I might ask about it. But honestly, I think I'm being rude when I do this! They probably don't want to discuss it, or get sick of talking about their interesting job because people always ask about it.

[Anonymous]

She sounds like someone I want to be friends with! I hate talking about my job when I'm not at work (and sometime when I am).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This has absolutely nothing to do with your friend being a SAHM.

I disagree. If a huge part of her day was the office, her boss, her projects, I think it would come up.

I see it as self-centeredness. If is does not exist in her bubble, it does not exist.

[Anonymous]

OP doesn’t seem very interested in engaging with us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This has absolutely nothing to do with your friend being a SAHM.

I disagree. If a huge part of her day was the office, her boss, her projects, I think it would come up.

I see it as self-centeredness. If is does not exist in her bubble, it does not exist.

+1.

[Anonymous]

I feel like job stuff is only interesting to a coworker or someone in the same field.

That said, I realized my friend was really into her job and proud of her accomplishments, so I asked her about it. She spoke in a not-overly detailed way, about what her success means to her life and how grateful she is for her work, and where she sees it taking her. I could relate, even though I do something totally different. I could tell she was happy/relieved/ pleased to talk about it, and I was happy to have provided the opportunity. I understand my friend better. Usually we talked about relationships, mutual friends, kids, going out, vacations so this conversation let me in on an important part of her life that I didn't know much about -- and this a friend I have had for 30 years, since we were in school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This has absolutely nothing to do with your friend being a SAHM.

I disagree. If a huge part of her day was the office, her boss, her projects, I think it would come up.

I see it as self-centeredness. If is does not exist in her bubble, it does not exist.

+1.

Bullshit! I work and I don't ask my friends about work unless they bring it up. For most people work isn't that interesting. OP simply doesn't have an identity outside of her job and is looking for a way to bash SAHMs. Sad.

[Anonymous]

Do people actually want to talk about their jobs? No. It’s not interesting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t ask people about their jobs. For one, it’s usually boring and for two, it’s usually hard to explain to an outsider and for three, most people who aren’t at work don’t want to spend social time talking/thinking about work.

This is clearly about your hang up about her being a SAHM so work on that.

When you have “grown children” (per the OP), you are no longer a “SAHM.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do people actually want to talk about their jobs? No. It’s not interesting.

Boring people talk about their jobs.

[Anonymous]

People don’t ask because it’s kind of intrusive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This has absolutely nothing to do with your friend being a SAHM.

I disagree. If a huge part of her day was the office, her boss, her projects, I think it would come up.

I see it as self-centeredness. If is does not exist in her bubble, it does not exist.

I think not. I work FT, I listen to my friends if they want to talk about their jobs, but I don't ask about them. Unless something is going on at work (and they shared it).

I think it is kind of self-centered to think that your friend WOULD ask about your job.

Your job is dull to other people. I mean, we don't even want to hear about our spouse's jobs, why would we want to hear about our friends' jobs??

[Anonymous]

You sound like a disdainful person who casually demeans her “friend.” I also don’t care about your job!