I haven't heard from my boyfriend since Friday night

[Anonymous]

This really makes me mad. If I had a relative who went missing for 3 days and I knew someone was aware of this fact and didn't fill out a missing person's report I would be furious at that person. OP, act like an adult with some common sense. Even if he's sleeping off a drunk somewhere he DID say he would contact you and he didn't. Time to fill out a missing person's report. We can help you find the correct agency to contact for this. Do you have a mild learning disability? Just trying to understand why you would not step up and fill out the report.

[Anonymous]

Normally I wouldn't suggest this but since OP is obsessed why don't you just whole hog and drive to his house???

[Anonymous]

Do you have a key to his place? It seems really silly for you to file a missing person's report if he could just be home.

You met him online. Maybe he met someone else online too. Maybe he didn't go hunting with his uncle and you are making it very awkward for his uncle.

I have known lots of scumbags out there. My very good friend was in a relationship with a guy in NYC for over a year. She later realized he had another girlfriend in the same city. DH has a friend who had a long distance girlfriend in another city while living it up dating in his current city. People I consider very decent have gone on weekend getaways and cheated. List goes on and on.

Sorry, stranger things have happened.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Normally I wouldn't suggest this but since OP is obsessed why don't you just whole hog and drive to his house???

We suggested this yesterday.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This really makes me mad. If I had a relative who went missing for 3 days and I knew someone was aware of this fact and didn't fill out a missing person's report I would be furious at that person. OP, act like an adult with some common sense. Even if he's sleeping off a drunk somewhere he DID say he would contact you and he didn't. Time to fill out a missing person's report. We can help you find the correct agency to contact for this. Do you have a mild learning disability? Just trying to understand why you would not step up and fill out the report.

She should go to his apt and work first. He could just be living his life and blowing her off.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This really makes me mad. If I had a relative who went missing for 3 days and I knew someone was aware of this fact and didn't fill out a missing person's report I would be furious at that person. OP, act like an adult with some common sense. Even if he's sleeping off a drunk somewhere he DID say he would contact you and he didn't. Time to fill out a missing person's report. We can help you find the correct agency to contact for this. Do you have a mild learning disability? Just trying to understand why you would not step up and fill out the report.

1. It hasn't been 3 days
2. He's disappeared and not called/texted OP when he should've before
3. Uncle was fishing this weekend and had pictures up on his FB of the people with him. The boyfriend wasn't one of them. He was not with his uncle this weekend therefore likely not in Maine at all
4. OP's guy is probably sitting in his house right now

That said, she should do a wellness check for her own sanity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This really makes me mad. If I had a relative who went missing for 3 days and I knew someone was aware of this fact and didn't fill out a missing person's report I would be furious at that person. OP, act like an adult with some common sense. Even if he's sleeping off a drunk somewhere he DID say he would contact you and he didn't. Time to fill out a missing person's report. We can help you find the correct agency to contact for this. Do you have a mild learning disability? Just trying to understand why you would not step up and fill out the report.

She should go to his apt and work first. He could just be living his life and blowing her off.

He lives 4 hours from her, and he doesn't have a physical work location. Don't suggest things if you haven't read through!

[Anonymous]

People are bat-shit crazy. Confronting someone in person is risky. This guy is not trustworthy. Keep your distance, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This really makes me mad. If I had a relative who went missing for 3 days and I knew someone was aware of this fact and didn't fill out a missing person's report I would be furious at that person. OP, act like an adult with some common sense. Even if he's sleeping off a drunk somewhere he DID say he would contact you and he didn't. Time to fill out a missing person's report. We can help you find the correct agency to contact for this. Do you have a mild learning disability? Just trying to understand why you would not step up and fill out the report.

She should go to his apt and work first. He could just be living his life and blowing her off.

He doesn't have a normal "work" place - he seems to freelance hauling cows for two farms. She also doesn't want to go to his house.

The following steps should be taken (I suggested this yesterday and she ignored it and now another 24 hours have gone by):

1) Call cops and ask for wellness check
2) If he's not home, fill out a missing person's report

Better safe than sorry. He genuinely could have come to a bad end.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This really makes me mad. If I had a relative who went missing for 3 days and I knew someone was aware of this fact and didn't fill out a missing person's report I would be furious at that person. OP, act like an adult with some common sense. Even if he's sleeping off a drunk somewhere he DID say he would contact you and he didn't. Time to fill out a missing person's report. We can help you find the correct agency to contact for this. Do you have a mild learning disability? Just trying to understand why you would not step up and fill out the report.

1. It hasn't been 3 days
2. He's disappeared and not called/texted OP when he should've before
3. Uncle was fishing this weekend and had pictures up on his FB of the people with him. The boyfriend wasn't one of them. He was not with his uncle this weekend therefore likely not in Maine at all
4. OP's guy is probably sitting in his house right now

That said, she should do a wellness check for her own sanity.

Op here: It's been 3 days, he was supposed to be home Sunday night, it's not Wednesday. His phones been off since Saturday and haven't heard from him since friday night. Also, he's never disappeared like this before. In my other post I said how we'd be texting in the morning and then he'd disappear all day. Never has he gone more then 24 hours without being in touch.

[Anonymous]

He also TOLD her that he was going up there to hunt bobcat pelts. He could easily still be in jail if he got caught.

[Anonymous]

OP, I read your previous thread months ago. I'm really, really sad for you that you have invested more time in a guy that you knew was fundamentally dishonest back then. Have you stopped for a minute to think about why you are still investing your time and energy in a guy who you knew you couldn't trust months ago?

I worry about you. I worry about what you are avoiding in your own life right there in Rhode Island that you would even consider someone who lives so far away to have a LDR with. It's one thing to have an LDR with someone you know and love who had to move away for some reason. But to start a relationship with a stranger, and then keep up a "relationship" with someone who lied to you so much, kept up a dating profile after you were dating, etc....and now all this! You are worth so much more than this. What's going on, OP?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This really makes me mad. If I had a relative who went missing for 3 days and I knew someone was aware of this fact and didn't fill out a missing person's report I would be furious at that person. OP, act like an adult with some common sense. Even if he's sleeping off a drunk somewhere he DID say he would contact you and he didn't. Time to fill out a missing person's report. We can help you find the correct agency to contact for this. Do you have a mild learning disability? Just trying to understand why you would not step up and fill out the report.

1. It hasn't been 3 days
2. He's disappeared and not called/texted OP when he should've before
3. Uncle was fishing this weekend and had pictures up on his FB of the people with him. The boyfriend wasn't one of them. He was not with his uncle this weekend therefore likely not in Maine at all
4. OP's guy is probably sitting in his house right now

That said, she should do a wellness check for her own sanity.

Op here: It's been 3 days, he was supposed to be home Sunday night, it's not Wednesday. His phones been off since Saturday and haven't heard from him since friday night. Also, he's never disappeared like this before. In my other post I said how we'd be texting in the morning and then he'd disappear all day. Never has he gone more then 24 hours without being in touch.

It's not Wednesday night yet but that's beside the point- what are you going to do about it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This really makes me mad. If I had a relative who went missing for 3 days and I knew someone was aware of this fact and didn't fill out a missing person's report I would be furious at that person. OP, act like an adult with some common sense. Even if he's sleeping off a drunk somewhere he DID say he would contact you and he didn't. Time to fill out a missing person's report. We can help you find the correct agency to contact for this. Do you have a mild learning disability? Just trying to understand why you would not step up and fill out the report.

1. It hasn't been 3 days
2. He's disappeared and not called/texted OP when he should've before
3. Uncle was fishing this weekend and had pictures up on his FB of the people with him. The boyfriend wasn't one of them. He was not with his uncle this weekend therefore likely not in Maine at all
4. OP's guy is probably sitting in his house right now

That said, she should do a wellness check for her own sanity.

Op here: It's been 3 days, he was supposed to be home Sunday night, it's not Wednesday. His phones been off since Saturday and haven't heard from him since friday night. Also, he's never disappeared like this before. In my other post I said how we'd be texting in the morning and then he'd disappear all day. Never has he gone more then 24 hours without being in touch.

Ahhh, OP...he was testing out what you would do if he ceased contact for a little while. And, you passed his test! You took him back! He obviously wants to be the driver in this relationship. Do you feel ok never having control? If so, when he finally does get in contact with you and offer his lame excuse and apologize, be sure to take him back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I read your previous thread months ago. I'm really, really sad for you that you have invested more time in a guy that you knew was fundamentally dishonest back then. Have you stopped for a minute to think about why you are still investing your time and energy in a guy who you knew you couldn't trust months ago?

I worry about you. I worry about what you are avoiding in your own life right there in Rhode Island that you would even consider someone who lives so far away to have a LDR with. It's one thing to have an LDR with someone you know and love who had to move away for some reason. But to start a relationship with a stranger, and then keep up a "relationship" with someone who lied to you so much, kept up a dating profile after you were dating, etc....and now all this! You are worth so much more than this. What's going on, OP?

+1

I asked similar questions and expressed similar concerns yesterday.