I haven't heard from my boyfriend since Friday night

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just don't accept OP's explanation that she can't email the uncle and ask after the BF because she is afraid someone might read the work email. All the email has to say is, "Hi, Uncle J, I am a friend of your nephew Bobcat. He was supposed to be in touch with me on Sunday night, but he did not call and I have not been able to reach him. I wanted to check and make sure he was ok. Have you heard from him?" What possible issue could there be with sending such an innocuous email to the uncle's work address at his fishing business? So what if someone else there read it?

OP here: please keep up. I just posted 2 pages ago that I sent an email to his personal email last night at 10 and have had no response. I'm gonna call uncles work now becauase im starting to get pissed off.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just don't accept OP's explanation that she can't email the uncle and ask after the BF because she is afraid someone might read the work email. All the email has to say is, "Hi, Uncle J, I am a friend of your nephew Bobcat. He was supposed to be in touch with me on Sunday night, but he did not call and I have not been able to reach him. I wanted to check and make sure he was ok. Have you heard from him?" What possible issue could there be with sending such an innocuous email to the uncle's work address at his fishing business? So what if someone else there read it?

This morning OP said that she did finally email Uncle J at 10 pm last night and he has not responded (yet).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just don't accept OP's explanation that she can't email the uncle and ask after the BF because she is afraid someone might read the work email. All the email has to say is, "Hi, Uncle J, I am a friend of your nephew Bobcat. He was supposed to be in touch with me on Sunday night, but he did not call and I have not been able to reach him. I wanted to check and make sure he was ok. Have you heard from him?" What possible issue could there be with sending such an innocuous email to the uncle's work address at his fishing business? So what if someone else there read it?

OP here: please keep up. I just posted 2 pages ago that I sent an email to his personal email last night at 10 and have had no response. I'm gonna call uncles work now becauase im starting to get pissed off.

OP - PLEASE be patient, some people are not quick to reply to e-mail.

[Anonymous]

OP, I would call the sheriff and ask for a wellness check, since he did tell you he was going into the Maine woods and he's now three days overdue coming back. Most likely they will tell you he is fine, which should give you the closure you need. Hopefully he will be at least a little bit embarrassed that his disappearing act got the police involved. He's only 26 and making a bunch of stupid mistakes, but he needs to learn that his actions have consequences.

If you do speak to him again, don't give him the satisfaction of freaking out on him. He'll only take that as validation that you are controlling and he had no choice but to lie to you. Just tell him that he's an asshole for not being honest and that it's over.

I agree with others that your picker is off. Maybe take some time away from dating and focus on yourself. I'm very happy that I didn't marry any of the losers and jerks I was in love with in my 20s, and hopefully that will be your experience, too. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

OP will seek suggestions and advice but will not follow through to resolution, because as long as the issue is unresolved the drama continues. And she NEEDS that. OP will never date a nice, honest guy from RI because a stable relationship will not fulfill her needs. She's gleaned as much info as she possibly could from this thread and yet continues to post, defending and imploring. Drama drama drama.

Although I guess as long as we're entertained....

[Anonymous]

I just don't accept OP's explanation that she can't email the uncle and ask after the BF because she is afraid someone might read the work email. All the email has to say is, "Hi, Uncle J, I am a friend of your nephew Bobcat. He was supposed to be in touch with me on Sunday night, but he did not call and I have not been able to reach him. I wanted to check and make sure he was ok. Have you heard from him?" What possible issue could there be with sending such an innocuous email to the uncle's work address at his fishing business? So what if someone else there read it?


This morning OP said that she did finally email Uncle J at 10 pm last night and he has not responded (yet).

Well, given that most of that time was overnight, that doesn't mean he's not going to. Why on earth did she wait till 10 pm?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just don't accept OP's explanation that she can't email the uncle and ask after the BF because she is afraid someone might read the work email. All the email has to say is, "Hi, Uncle J, I am a friend of your nephew Bobcat. He was supposed to be in touch with me on Sunday night, but he did not call and I have not been able to reach him. I wanted to check and make sure he was ok. Have you heard from him?" What possible issue could there be with sending such an innocuous email to the uncle's work address at his fishing business? So what if someone else there read it?

OP here: please keep up. I just posted 2 pages ago that I sent an email to his personal email last night at 10 and have had no response. I'm gonna call uncles work now becauase im starting to get pissed off.

OP - PLEASE be patient, some people are not quick to reply to e-mail.

Except Uncle J is pretty active on FB.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh, I see you said he doesn't really work for that farm. Are you sure? How come it's on his fb page?

Op here: it's not at all, idk where people
Even found that

Yeah, you're right. Where did I see that then?? I definitely saw it somewhere online, that's strange.

ANOTHER FB profile for someone by that same name comes up when you combine all those details. I'm willing to bet that's her "BF" alternate or older profile that he's either used to ensnare other girls or that's the one he uses for his real relationships.

She said that she knew it was an old profile.

Not everything confusing is a lie. If you look at some of my old social media, which still exists in cached versions because that's the nature of the internet, it will show me as living in a place I haven't lived for many years, married to someone I'm not married to. I'm also blonde in those pictures, which I am not now.

I'm referring to one that comes up with his full name (not nickname). If you type in www.facebook.com/firstname.lastname.9 you'll see it. It's still up, not deleted.

It shows nothing at all

True. But it does come up in the searches. That fact that it is completely closed off makes me wonder if it's his "real" account.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP will seek suggestions and advice but will not follow through to resolution, because as long as the issue is unresolved the drama continues. And she NEEDS that. OP will never date a nice, honest guy from RI because a stable relationship will not fulfill her needs. She's gleaned as much info as she possibly could from this thread and yet continues to post, defending and imploring. Drama drama drama.

Although I guess as long as we're entertained....

It's true. Eventually people lose patience with these perpetual victims.

[Anonymous]

OP will seek suggestions and advice but will not follow through to resolution, because as long as the issue is unresolved the drama continues. And she NEEDS that.

I think this is an accurate assessment. She either delays doing something that could resolve the issue, or has some completely lame excuse about why she can't do it. She just wants to continue the drama and angst for as long as possible. Whatever, I'm out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I would call the sheriff and ask for a wellness check, since he did tell you he was going into the Maine woods and he's now three days overdue coming back. .

This is really the only thing that needs to happen now.

And if it embarrasses the bf, he needs to come up with better lies.

Especially since the Maine game warden might be looking for him, thanks to DCUM.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Whatever, I'm out.

Be honest- no you're not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, did he seem depressed at all? I hate to mention this as a possibility but could he have committed suicide out there at the cabin? I think you should definitely make it a priority to talk to the sheriff and fill out a missing person's report.

Op here: im not getting into a lot of details now that some know his family info but yes, he had been going through some things regarding his grandfathers health that has really been effecting him a lot. So even though he is a "jerk" or "liar" like some are saying, I am still concerned that something could have happened.

He is a jerk and a liar! Don't put quotes around that. Stop defending him. Dang!

[Anonymous]

Op here: just tried uncles work again and no answer for me. Idk how people got through yesterday but I can't seem to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

OP will seek suggestions and advice but will not follow through to resolution, because as long as the issue is unresolved the drama continues. And she NEEDS that.

I think this is an accurate assessment. She either delays doing something that could resolve the issue, or has some completely lame excuse about why she can't do it. She just wants to continue the drama and angst for as long as possible. Whatever, I'm out.

I don't think it's is quite true. What's really going on, IMO, is that as long as she doesn't know the real answer, she's got a boyfriend. As soon as she finds out he played her, she's alone and single. It's a loneliness thing. BTDT.