Work 65+hour weeks + young baby

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

But who says working more than 40 hours a week means your job is your priority? Smh. Ridiculous.

There is a huge difference between 45+ and 65+ and you know it. Don’t be disingenuous. (Also you might be confused because more than one poster was responding in that thread...)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op, everyone is shit-Ing on you because they don’t live in nyc and have no idea how much it costs to live here. 400k really doesn’t go as far as people think here. I empathize. I don’t work 65 hour weeks but DH regularly works 70 plus hour weeks and I’m at 45hrs. This is just the reality of what two working professional families do in Manhattan. You situation may seem crazy by DC standards but it’s not uncommon in nyc.

I was unaware that people are forced to live in Manhattan.

Listen, if money is your priority have at it, the kids are certainly well provided for and will most likely be fine, but don’t lie to yourself that working so much isn’t a choice.

Lots of jobs are based only in Manhattan. Commuting from burbs or an outer borough takes time away too.

Well then you need to decide what is most important. I know numerous people who commute from CT and have a HHI way lower than $400k. If you live somewhere cheaper and still have the flexibility to WAH then you wouldn't need to work 65 hrs per week.

[Anonymous]

OP, what is your job?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I dont know how yall accept that this is our work culture. If the job cant be done in 40 hours then you need another person on it. Theres not an amount in the world that would make my entire life be work 1st and everything else around it. Man or Woman. If thats the only place you find value then you are seriously lacking.

So...a surgeon who hits 40 hours in the middle of a surgery should just say, "well, I'm done here"? The fact that you can't conceive of ANY job that would require more than 40 hours a week shows how limited your world view is. Shockingly limited, actually. I find your narrowmindedness to be more surprising than the OP.

DP, but - I assume surgeries are scheduled? And there is a general idea of how long a surgery should take? So, yes, don’t schedule so many surgeries that the surgeon would be likely to go over 40 hours per week... sometimes a surgery will take longer than the expected time, plus the fudge factor, but that should be the exception.

It doesn’t seem that complicated, actually.

For a plastics surgeon, maybe. I have a ton of friends who are surgeons in a hospital and they are always dealing with emergent, unplanned surgeries. You are aware that accidents happen like, a lot, right?

Hence the need for MORE surgeons (i.e. the “another person” in the original post), NOT for each surgeon to do the work of 2+ people... 🙄

Um...are you aware of how difficult it is to become a surgeon? They don’t exactly grow on trees. And we’re not just talking 40 hours of OR time - they still have to do paperwork and prep for surgery. And if you think you can appropriately train to become a surgeon in 40 hours a week or less, you are dead wrong. So either you lower thresholds a lot and have lower average quality, or you basically tell people sorry, you’re SOL, supply is infinitely greater than demand. I bet you’re also pretty damn glad that Moderna, Pfizer and j&j scientists were working around the clock last year.

Maybe your field and your lifestyle choice is different than others and that is fine, but don’t twist yourself into knots trying to convince everyone they’re boring or worthless if they have professional ambition

My DH is a surgeon. We had a kid during residency and another during his surgical fellowship. He worked 80 hours per week during training, had to study for his board exams and also did research and wrote papers. During fellowship, he took half a day off when our second child was born.

He does have more control over his schedule now. DH operates 3.5 days per week and sees patients in his clinic 1.5 days per week. He is reliably home for dinner 2 out of 5 days per week. 2 days he is home late and 1 day per week we are not sure. He works around 60 hours per week.

I am a SAHM though. Before I stopped working, I took every sick day and every snow day. DH would not cancel surgeries or cancel 40 patients in clinic because our kid had a 101 fever. When I worked, DH did take some days off when school had teacher work days. He makes his schedule 3 months in advance so he can’t just take off on the fly.

[Anonymous]

Op, what do you do for a living? Finance? Lawyer?