Out of town in laws attendance at birthdays

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids party is later this month and I’m totally dreading the in-laws coming. I know that sounds terrible. I just don’t have the energy to host, nonstop cleaning, cooking 3x a day. I also feel like I can’t focus on what my kids need and making sure the day is wonderful for them. All of that sounds stupid, but I become an anxious mess. My own parents are local and just come for the party and leave after. It’s not a big production for them.

Don’t cook three times a day.

Period.

[Anonymous]

OP reminds me of a friend who didn’t send me an invite to her baby shower because she thought I’d feel out of place as I didn’t know anyone else there. Why assume? Just invite and see what the other person says. Maybe they would’ve said no. Or do they stay with you and so you didn’t want them to spend the night?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP reminds me of a friend who didn’t send me an invite to her baby shower because she thought I’d feel out of place as I didn’t know anyone else there. Why assume? Just invite and see what the other person says. Maybe they would’ve said no. Or do they stay with you and so you didn’t want them to spend the night?

Same thing happened to me. My former best friend didn't invite me to her daughter's 1st birthday party. I was the godmother. Our relationship fell apart and now we never talk anymore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s ridiculous to invite the out of town grandparents. The party is for and about the child, not the grands. They can make the trip another time and let the child have her party.

Troll. And not a good one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids party is later this month and I’m totally dreading the in-laws coming. I know that sounds terrible. I just don’t have the energy to host, nonstop cleaning, cooking 3x a day. I also feel like I can’t focus on what my kids need and making sure the day is wonderful for them. All of that sounds stupid, but I become an anxious mess. My own parents are local and just come for the party and leave after. It’s not a big production for them.

Your husband is helping with cleaning and you don’t need to prepare 3 meals a day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Am I supposed to be inviting my out of state in laws to my kids birthday parties? I've never considered that. Why am I going to pay for 2 grandparents to come to SkyZoe from out of state. I wouldn't even have time to chat with them I'd be busy making polite small talk with the parents who didn't drop off, and arranging cake and pizza etc and making sure no one has a broken femur on the trampoline. I'm not interested in hosting a kids birthday party AND hosting my in laws at the same time.

Yeah, we get it. You don’t give a shit about your family. It’s all good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I supposed to be inviting my out of state in laws to my kids birthday parties? I've never considered that. Why am I going to pay for 2 grandparents to come to SkyZoe from out of state. I wouldn't even have time to chat with them I'd be busy making polite small talk with the parents who didn't drop off, and arranging cake and pizza etc and making sure no one has a broken femur on the trampoline. I'm not interested in hosting a kids birthday party AND hosting my in laws at the same time.

We don’t focus on socializing with the in-laws during the actual party..that’s for the kids and chatting with other parents.

The in-laws stay with us for at least 3 days and we talk then. Plenty of time to catch up with them.

I guess I wonder why on earth theyd even want to come. They arent going to be spending time with my kids, unless they think theyre going to be able to drag them out of the trampoline and make them chat with them on the sidelines or something. Theyre not going to be chatting with me or DH. Theyre just going to be standing there and probably bored and over stimulated, for 2 hours. Again- never even crossed my mind. We usually invite them down the weekend before or the weekend after to say happy birthday and go out to dinner if they want.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I supposed to be inviting my out of state in laws to my kids birthday parties? I've never considered that. Why am I going to pay for 2 grandparents to come to SkyZoe from out of state. I wouldn't even have time to chat with them I'd be busy making polite small talk with the parents who didn't drop off, and arranging cake and pizza etc and making sure no one has a broken femur on the trampoline. I'm not interested in hosting a kids birthday party AND hosting my in laws at the same time.

You don't pay for people who don't jump at Sky Zone, dork.

It was just an example. And FWIW, I do have to give a head count for pizza, so yeah I'd be ordering an additional pizza if my in laws were coming, because you can't run out of slices, that would be impolite. Even if my in laws won't eat them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP reminds me of a friend who didn’t send me an invite to her baby shower because she thought I’d feel out of place as I didn’t know anyone else there. Why assume? Just invite and see what the other person says. Maybe they would’ve said no. Or do they stay with you and so you didn’t want them to spend the night?

What she meant was, she knew you wouldn't know anyone there, and she didn't want to be stressed out about making sure you felt welcomed, included in conversations, and got introduced around. I've been there, with guest lists before. I solve it by making sure I invite an additional 1-2 people that do in fact know the friend in question, but if there were space constraints, and 19 out of the 20 people are old friends from high school and the 20th is a work friend who has never met anyone before, it sounds exhausting to me as a hostess to invite that work friend and then spend half the party making sure they don't feel out of place. Because as a hostess, that responsibility does in fact fall on me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I supposed to be inviting my out of state in laws to my kids birthday parties? I've never considered that. Why am I going to pay for 2 grandparents to come to SkyZoe from out of state. I wouldn't even have time to chat with them I'd be busy making polite small talk with the parents who didn't drop off, and arranging cake and pizza etc and making sure no one has a broken femur on the trampoline. I'm not interested in hosting a kids birthday party AND hosting my in laws at the same time.

Yeah, we get it. You don’t give a shit about your family. It’s all good.

Do you people who always invite grandparents to 7 year olds’ birthday parties never see them the rest of the year or something? We see my in-laws for every holiday and my parents for most of them as well. (Parents are much further away.) We see the in-laws for the kids’ birthdays separate from the parties - they come for dinner and cake. We see them for every adult birthday and Mother’s Day, Father’s Day etc. We vacation one week each summer with the in-laws and one week with my parents. We additionally see them all at least every couple of months just to get together. Also there is a magical thing called the phone.

I think they can all handle not coming to jump parties and birthday parties.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I supposed to be inviting my out of state in laws to my kids birthday parties? I've never considered that. Why am I going to pay for 2 grandparents to come to SkyZoe from out of state. I wouldn't even have time to chat with them I'd be busy making polite small talk with the parents who didn't drop off, and arranging cake and pizza etc and making sure no one has a broken femur on the trampoline. I'm not interested in hosting a kids birthday party AND hosting my in laws at the same time.

Yeah, we get it. You don’t give a shit about your family. It’s all good.

I love my family including my in laws but no, i'm not inviting everyone I'm related to to every thing our family does. A 8 year old's birthday party is for the 8 year old to enjoy with her friends. It doesn't involve grandma and shouldn't have to. A polite dinner with grandma can happen the next day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I supposed to be inviting my out of state in laws to my kids birthday parties? I've never considered that. Why am I going to pay for 2 grandparents to come to SkyZoe from out of state. I wouldn't even have time to chat with them I'd be busy making polite small talk with the parents who didn't drop off, and arranging cake and pizza etc and making sure no one has a broken femur on the trampoline. I'm not interested in hosting a kids birthday party AND hosting my in laws at the same time.

You don't pay for people who don't jump at Sky Zone, dork.

It was just an example. And FWIW, I do have to give a head count for pizza, so yeah I'd be ordering an additional pizza if my in laws were coming, because you can't run out of slices, that would be impolite. Even if my in laws won't eat them.

What kind of cheap ass minimal food parties are you throwing? Do you have an exact count of pizza slices allotted to each guest such that there will be no left overs?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I supposed to be inviting my out of state in laws to my kids birthday parties? I've never considered that. Why am I going to pay for 2 grandparents to come to SkyZoe from out of state. I wouldn't even have time to chat with them I'd be busy making polite small talk with the parents who didn't drop off, and arranging cake and pizza etc and making sure no one has a broken femur on the trampoline. I'm not interested in hosting a kids birthday party AND hosting my in laws at the same time.

We don’t focus on socializing with the in-laws during the actual party..that’s for the kids and chatting with other parents.

The in-laws stay with us for at least 3 days and we talk then. Plenty of time to catch up with them.

I guess I wonder why on earth theyd even want to come. They arent going to be spending time with my kids, unless they think theyre going to be able to drag them out of the trampoline and make them chat with them on the sidelines or something. Theyre not going to be chatting with me or DH. Theyre just going to be standing there and probably bored and over stimulated, for 2 hours. Again- never even crossed my mind. We usually invite them down the weekend before or the weekend after to say happy birthday and go out to dinner if they want.

You can always spot the entitled grandparents from miles away. They compete with the mom and insist on talking to everyone. Lady, I’m your grandchild’s classmate’s mom. I don’t want to talk to half the parents let alone listen to you talk at me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I supposed to be inviting my out of state in laws to my kids birthday parties? I've never considered that. Why am I going to pay for 2 grandparents to come to SkyZoe from out of state. I wouldn't even have time to chat with them I'd be busy making polite small talk with the parents who didn't drop off, and arranging cake and pizza etc and making sure no one has a broken femur on the trampoline. I'm not interested in hosting a kids birthday party AND hosting my in laws at the same time.

You don't pay for people who don't jump at Sky Zone, dork.

It was just an example. And FWIW, I do have to give a head count for pizza, so yeah I'd be ordering an additional pizza if my in laws were coming, because you can't run out of slices, that would be impolite. Even if my in laws won't eat them.

What kind of cheap ass minimal food parties are you throwing? Do you have an exact count of pizza slices allotted to each guest such that there will be no left overs?

I mean I think you just want to argue with me about anything at this point. This is so far off topic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I supposed to be inviting my out of state in laws to my kids birthday parties? I've never considered that. Why am I going to pay for 2 grandparents to come to SkyZoe from out of state. I wouldn't even have time to chat with them I'd be busy making polite small talk with the parents who didn't drop off, and arranging cake and pizza etc and making sure no one has a broken femur on the trampoline. I'm not interested in hosting a kids birthday party AND hosting my in laws at the same time.

You don't pay for people who don't jump at Sky Zone, dork.

It was just an example. And FWIW, I do have to give a head count for pizza, so yeah I'd be ordering an additional pizza if my in laws were coming, because you can't run out of slices, that would be impolite. Even if my in laws won't eat them.

What kind of cheap ass minimal food parties are you throwing? Do you have an exact count of pizza slices allotted to each guest such that there will be no left overs?

I mean I think you just want to argue with me about anything at this point. This is so far off topic.

Well, you keep making up bizarre scenarios to explain OPs oversight. Now it's pizza and too cheap to spring for Sky Zone? What's next?