Question for child health experts: Does a tween/teen HAVE TO shower every single day?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:All the teens and adults I know who only shower every other day or third day do in fact smell. They think they don’t, but they do.

Didn't take you long. You must have an alert set for shower posts.

Admit it, you're the 3 times a day underwear changer.

OP, it's perfectly fine to not shower every day. Ignore these nutjobs.

Look, just because you are nose blind to your own pungent funk doesn't mean others don't notice it.

DP here. I have one teen that needs a daily shower and one that doesn’t. Sorry nuance is hard for you.

Just says one of your kids is inactive and lazy.

Jesus woman. You are a massive b1tch.

x1 million

WTF is wrong with you?

Facts. If you are sweating then shower. Get some exercise it will help you! Many more benefits than being so lazy you never break a sweat and would rarely need a shower. That is nothing to brag about.

NP. How old are you?

How much do you exercise? Do you ever break a sweat?

I exercise and shower daily.

How old are you?

I also exercise and shower daily. Age is irrelevant. What age is told not to exercise or shower after? Certainly not teens.

Are you PP? I was asking how old you are to gauge how embarrassed I should be for you based on your earlier comments

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:OP here, first of all THANK YOU for all the answers, I appreciate everyone who took the question seriously even though there was a range of answers.

To answer the couple of people who asked what the issue the meeting was to discuss, it was bedtime routines that will help her sleep better. It's not that I silently disagreed with a nightly shower as a way to relax, I get that. It's that the therapist said "How about you do ______ every night before you take your shower to save time, then take your nightly shower, then - " and the teen interrupted and said "I don't shower every night. Usually every other night." And the therapist was visually surprised and bothered, and instead of asking questions like "So, tell me about your choice not to shower every night, or is there something that stops you from doing it?" And she said "I just don't feel like it every night" and then the therapist went on to say she had to, that it was the only way to stay adequately clean and not smell. AS IF your genital health will actually be compromised and your body odor noticeable if you don't, in every case.

That's what I took issue with, since the therapist had been seeing the girl in person for over a year and no one had complained about any smell or odor, she'd never been bullied or made fun of about it (bullying wasn't an issue at all in her case), and she has many friends.

Again, I am fine with the idea of a shower every night to help relax and make it more likey she'll fall asleep faster (getting to sleep was sometimes an issue for her so overall the parents are being advised to have a more structured routine, which makes perfect sense). It was the therapist going straight in on insisting on daily showers and telling her it was a healthy body/healthy privates issue and very important she do it daily that bugged the hell out of me.

Anonymous wrote:This is why professionals need to give a basis for their recommendations, so you can see if the premise makes sense. Daily bathing is not, for example, a medical/health necessity, but I can see where for some people (adhd, depression, etc) the recommendation is more about sticking to a routine or demonstrating ability to care for oneself. Does not sound like this was needed here though.

Thank you for this, I explained the bigger point above, but you're right, it was originally about the routine but there were other things she offered as ideas to get to sleep faster that the teen or her parents shot down, and the therapist was very flexible. But this she was like "Oh, NO, you MUST SHOWER DAILY!!!" Specifically for medical/health reasons, and that is what bugged me because I've never ever had anyone (and I used to have to train temporary care parents and adoptive parents in the basic necessities and basic practices and of course hygeine was important for both physical and emotional/mental reasons, but never was a daily shower insisted on by the experts. Daily recommended, but clean and at least a few showers/baths a week was mandatory.

Thank you and thanks everyone!

Sorry. But your therapist is right. She really should be showering daily. Perhaps her delivery if that message could be better. But you should have been telling her this all along. So I guess someone else had to.

As you have read from various posts here, there is NO medical need to shower daily. Different bodies have different needs. Not all bodies smell after 23 hours. A lot depends on activity level, climate, and temperature/humidity, too.


The problem with what the therapist said is that she framed it as a medical necessity. That's simply not true.

Dermatologists recommend daily showering. Is that not medical advice?

They don't though. Not all of them anyway and not universally.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There is one anti-shower old lady in here sock-pocketing. Go away already. No one cares what your dermatologist advises you to do

I think you might be talking about me. I am neither old nor am I anti shower. Get a grip and take your own advice to "go away already." I care about what my dermatologist advised me and my child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If OP's daughter is at a therapist, she probably has more important concerns than whether her 10 yo showers every day.

Every other day is passable at thst age unless they have a sport every day.

Sorry saw it was an older child, but regardless their "smell" may be the least of OP's concerns.

It’s not OP’s daughter. OP is just a busybody who observes therapy sessions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
This. I myself am not sure how I would thoroughly wash my pits and privates without getting into thw shower or making a big mess of the bathroom.

Seriously? Use a washcloth, wet and soapy, clean the underarms and genitals/anal area of the body. Rinse the washcloth, rinse the underarms and genitals/anal area of body - or use two washcloths if you prefer and wish to be really decadent.

Honestly the way some of you are posting, it’s seemingly unimaginable to you that human beings survived millions of years before showers even existed.

You’re all examples of successful brainwashing and nothing more. Any actual medical professionals reading this thread are laughing at your idiocy.

[Anonymous]

It's not about smell. It's about reducing stress, getting better sleep and increasing dopamines.

[Anonymous]

Dermatologist almost universally agree that showering or bathing every day is neither necessary or ideal for most people.

https://www.metrolinadermatology.com/charlotte-dermatologist/dermatology-guidelines-for-how-often-you-should-shower#:~:text=Hence%2C%20the%20showering%20frequency%20can%20vary%20from%20person%20to%20person.&text=Dermatologist%20almost%20universally%20agree%20that,or%20ideal%20for%20most%20people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
This. I myself am not sure how I would thoroughly wash my pits and privates without getting into thw shower or making a big mess of the bathroom.

Seriously? Use a washcloth, wet and soapy, clean the underarms and genitals/anal area of the body. Rinse the washcloth, rinse the underarms and genitals/anal area of body - or use two washcloths if you prefer and wish to be really decadent.

Honestly the way some of you are posting, it’s seemingly unimaginable to you that human beings survived millions of years before showers even existed.

You’re all examples of successful brainwashing and nothing more. Any actual medical professionals reading this thread are laughing at your idiocy.

Washcloth 🤢. Only if it’s burgundy

I’d rather not shower if this is the other option.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you really dislike this woman? Are you gathering evidence against her?

Because your reaction to her comment is bananas.

Disagree that OPs reaction is “bananas.”

She’s a little verbose in just asking “is this an accurate clinical standard”—but I don’t think that’s a crazy question.

OP seems to be quite reasonably stating that she understands having a baseline expectation for hygeine and cleanliness, but is questioning whether “showering every day” is that clinical baseline.

IMO (based on OP’s retelling of the story), it sounds as though the therapist expressed shock that a teen would say they only showered every other day or every three days. To me, this would only be concerning if the teen in question were an athlete whose daily practice causes him/her to sweat. Otherwise I think it’s totally normal and hygienic to shower every other day. (As an aside, I think it’s weird for a therapist to react with shock to anything. Especially something as minor as this when it isn’t the reason for the appointment. But my guess is this is what rattled OP. The therapist shouldn’t be coming at you with all kinds of judgment about something that isn’t even a thing….)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All the teens and adults I know who only shower every other day or third day do in fact smell. They think they don’t, but they do.

Didn't take you long. You must have an alert set for shower posts.

Admit it, you're the 3 times a day underwear changer.

OP, it's perfectly fine to not shower every day. Ignore these nutjobs.

Look, just because you are nose blind to your own pungent funk doesn't mean others don't notice it.

DP here. I have one teen that needs a daily shower and one that doesn’t. Sorry nuance is hard for you.

Just says one of your kids is inactive and lazy.

Jesus woman. You are a massive b1tch.

x1 million

WTF is wrong with you?

Facts. If you are sweating then shower. Get some exercise it will help you! Many more benefits than being so lazy you never break a sweat and would rarely need a shower. That is nothing to brag about.

NP. How old are you?

How much do you exercise? Do you ever break a sweat?

I exercise and shower daily.

How old are you?

I also exercise and shower daily. Age is irrelevant. What age is told not to exercise or shower after? Certainly not teens.

Are you PP? I was asking how old you are to gauge how embarrassed I should be for you based on your earlier comments

No need. I'm already embarrassed for the people bragging that their lazy teens who scroll social medial all day rarely shower. I wonder what they say when the pediatrician asks them how often they exercise?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All the teens and adults I know who only shower every other day or third day do in fact smell. They think they don’t, but they do.

Didn't take you long. You must have an alert set for shower posts.

Admit it, you're the 3 times a day underwear changer.

OP, it's perfectly fine to not shower every day. Ignore these nutjobs.

Look, just because you are nose blind to your own pungent funk doesn't mean others don't notice it.

DP here. I have one teen that needs a daily shower and one that doesn’t. Sorry nuance is hard for you.

Just says one of your kids is inactive and lazy.

Jesus woman. You are a massive b1tch.

x1 million

WTF is wrong with you?

Facts. If you are sweating then shower. Get some exercise it will help you! Many more benefits than being so lazy you never break a sweat and would rarely need a shower. That is nothing to brag about.

NP. How old are you?

How much do you exercise? Do you ever break a sweat?

I exercise and shower daily.

How old are you?

I also exercise and shower daily. Age is irrelevant. What age is told not to exercise or shower after? Certainly not teens.

Are you PP? I was asking how old you are to gauge how embarrassed I should be for you based on your earlier comments

No need. I'm already embarrassed for the people bragging that their lazy teens who scroll social medial all day rarely shower. I wonder what they say when the pediatrician asks them how often they exercise?

well stop wondering. it's none of your business.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All the teens and adults I know who only shower every other day or third day do in fact smell. They think they don’t, but they do.

Didn't take you long. You must have an alert set for shower posts.

Admit it, you're the 3 times a day underwear changer.

OP, it's perfectly fine to not shower every day. Ignore these nutjobs.

Look, just because you are nose blind to your own pungent funk doesn't mean others don't notice it.

DP here. I have one teen that needs a daily shower and one that doesn’t. Sorry nuance is hard for you.

Just says one of your kids is inactive and lazy.

Jesus woman. You are a massive b1tch.

x1 million

WTF is wrong with you?

Facts. If you are sweating then shower. Get some exercise it will help you! Many more benefits than being so lazy you never break a sweat and would rarely need a shower. That is nothing to brag about.

NP. How old are you?

How much do you exercise? Do you ever break a sweat?

I exercise and shower daily.

How old are you?

I also exercise and shower daily. Age is irrelevant. What age is told not to exercise or shower after? Certainly not teens.

Are you PP? I was asking how old you are to gauge how embarrassed I should be for you based on your earlier comments

No need. I'm already embarrassed for the people bragging that their lazy teens who scroll social medial all day rarely shower. I wonder what they say when the pediatrician asks them how often they exercise?

well stop wondering. it's none of your business.

We already know the answer. It's strange that people think this is evidence of best practices or good for the mental health of teens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:goodness gracious. this is disgusting. teens have all kinds of odors. gender doesnt matter. showering is a must! especially boys

[Anonymous]

OP, some real advice:

Your teen should *need to shower daily. If they don’t, they aren’t getting enough activity and are slovenly

1) exercise/sports daily or at least most days
2) shower daily

These two things will tremendously help their ability to feel tired and fall asleep at night and improve their mental health

[Anonymous]

Its cultural. I’m from Colombia and people will dismay if someone says they don’t shower daily. Teachers will absolutely call the parents if a child reveals non-daily showers at school, no matter the age (even in pre-school). And it has to be in the morning. Evening showers are frowned upon.